A/N: This is my first attempt at writing a Lily and Snape piece. I don't think it turned out too badly… but some feedback would be immensely helpful.
The italicized lyrics within the story are taken from the song "So Goodbye" performed by Redgum, with all rights belonging to their respective owners.
No copyright infringement intended. I own nothing.
Enjoy.
So Goodbye
'I've just begun to notice the cold steel in your eyes…'
He was not the man she once knew.
Not anymore.
The boy that had first introduced her to a world she loved, a world she now called home, and told her that she was a Witch. Her best friend who had stood by her side through thick and thin, good times and bad, tumult and strife and supported the decisions she made, no matter what. The man she had trusted with so many of her deepest and darkest secrets.
That man was gone.
He had broken her heart.
All she had wanted to do was help him, to be there for him like he had been there for her. To make that obnoxious git Potter leave him alone, and her too for that matter. Was it so much to ask?
Apparently so, it had seemed.
In return for caring for him, all she had gotten was a cold glance, a cruel insult and the aforementioned broken heart.
How could he?
She sighed. She already knew the answer.
It wasn't so much him, as them.
Even though they'd been sorted into different houses, their first few years at Hogwarts hadn't changed anything. They were closer than they'd ever been. Yes, their friendship had been the cause of numerous scandalous whispers and countless outraged stares, but they hadn't cared. As long as they had each other, nothing else mattered.
They had been happy.
It was when they returned to school after the holidays for the new school year that things had started to change, and definitely not for the better.
They had begun to spend less and less time together, each finding other friends within their own houses. But while she spent the majority of her time surrounded by caring, harmless and well-meaning Gryffindor's, he had done the complete opposite.
Her best friend had fallen into a dangerous crowd. In fact, they were the very epitome of dangerous. Cruel, vindictive and malicious, they were your stereotypical Slytherin gang of heartless brutes. Mindless in their worship of forces they didn't understand, fooling around with powers that, she was sure, would one day kill them all and everyone around them, or at least see them with life sentences in Azkaban.
She utterly loathed them.
Severus was different.
He wasn't like them.
She was frightened for him. He didn't know what he was getting himself into.
She'd always believed that he deserved so much more. So much better.
But now she wasn't so sure.
She didn't quite know why he did it. She supposed that it was a combination of frustration, humiliation, spite, selfishness and their influence. But it didn't matter. What mattered was that he had done it.
With one, single word he had managed to shatter everything they had built together.
He didn't deserve her anymore.
When she had looked into his eyes at that moment, she couldn't see him anymore. It was then that she realised that the Severus Snape she had once known, perhaps even loved, was long dead, buried and forgotten.
All that remained was a strange, empty blackness, devoid of any real emotion. It was the exact same colour as that of his soulless heart and one which perfectly corresponded with that of both his hair and wardrobe.
Maybe she should've recognised that as a sign of what was to come. After all, clothes make the man, if he could even be called that anymore.
Despite everything, she knew that some small part of her would always care about him, always worry about him, and always remember him. But she would do her best to drown it, through whatever means necessary. Harsh as it sounded, it was all she could do now.
There was nothing left anymore. No reason to stay by his side. No reason to believe in him.
There was only one thing that she could do.
She had to walk away.
She knew that he would follow, sooner or later. Apologizing for his mistakes and grovelling for her forgiveness. He would tell her that he was a fool and that he hadn't meant to use that particular word. But it didn't matter. None of it did anymore.
It was too late.
Too late to take back what was said, too late to earn her forgiveness, and too late for them.
She had only one word left for him now, and that one, tiny word was perhaps the hardest to utter.
But she had to.
'So I say to you goodbye.'
Don't be shy, tell me what you think. Loved it? Hated it? Comments and reviews are always welcome and much appreciated.
