Ok, I honestly don't really know what this is. It's an idea that's kind of been bouncing around in my head for months, and I've worked on it here and there. I haven't seen 6.01 or 5.24 actually, so canon post 5.23 only loosely applies.

This is inspired by A.E. Housman's "When I was one-and-twenty"

Characters not mine, neither are any spelling mistakes, skipped words, grammar whoopsies, or general lameness. If these things bother you, feel free to contact Stephanie Savage, though she might be too busy weeping over the train station scene in 4.2 to listen.


When Dan was ten, Ms. Noelle, his fifth grade teacher, asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up.

"A writer," voice so full of confidence and conviction that it surprised her. Such self-assuredness was something rarely found in her peers, let alone a small, quiet, introverted child.

"Why?"

"Because I can give myself a happy ending." He said this like it was the most obvious thing in the world. She supposed it was.

When Dan was fifteen, he received a "B" on a creative writing assignment.

"Your style is good. There is a lot of potential, but the ending was completely unrealistic."

"Why?"

"In real life, not everyone gets a happy ending. The hero doesn't always win. Bad things happen to good people. You can't just write that all away."

Dan thought of his parents increasing hostility towards one another. He thought of Vanessa, leaving without saying anything to him after he had confessed his feelings for her. He thought about the fact that even this teacher, his favorite, thought his name was Dave.

"Well, I can try."

When Dan was twenty, his agent Alessandra asked about the ending of Inside.

"Why was Clair the only person who got to escape and be happy?"

She saw his eyes dart to the floor. She watched him shift uncomfortably and run his hand through hair before answering.

"Because she needed a happy ending, and I wanted to be the person to give it to her."

When Dan was twenty-one, a small brunette showed up at his door, hair perfectly curled, pale hands holding his newest book.

"I knew you were mad at me." She said as she stood in place, looking up at him. "I didn't know you hated me."

He sighed heavily. "I don't hate you Blair."

"Well, your prose tells another story. Is that all our relationship was to you? Inspiration for another story? Did it really mean that little to you? Did I mean that little to you?"

He let out a small laugh. "You're joking right?"

He saw the outrage fill her eyes, her jaw tense. She lifted her hand and began poking his chest. "How dare you laugh at me! You used me. You took what we had and you used it and twisted it so you could sell another book. You-"

"I loved you Blair," his voice silenced her. She dropped her hand. "I was willing to do anything for you. I didn't need special parties or fancy galas. I just wanted to be with you, be there for you. I tried for so long to be what you said you wanted, what you needed."

She shifted her weight and crossed her arms. "I think you're-"

"You broke my heart. Don't try to hide behind your false anger and distort events. I asked you if you wanted him, you lied to me. You picked him. You left me. You broke up with me. Not even warped Blair-logic can change that." He looked at her for a moment before fixating on a spot over her shoulder. He licked his lips and swallowed before continuing softly, "I loved you and I was nothing to you."

Blair stood there for a moment longer, no longer angry and indignant. No, now all she could muster up was sorrow, embarrassment, and regret. She turned to leave, but stopped when she remembered something that had confused her about the ending of the book last night.

"If I meant so much to you. If our relationship was so important, then why did we not end together? Why didn't I choose you? Why didn't we drive off into the sunset, happily ever after?"

His response was quick and firm, "Happy endings don't exist in real life." His words were dark, cold, and completely void of warm idealism she had long ago associated with him.

She frowned. "Dan, I'm-"

He lowered his head and quietly said, "Goodbye Blair." He shut the door, and left her standing alone in the dimly lit hallway.

I guess you're finally one of us, she thought sardonically, as she turned to leave.