Rating: K+. And this does contain femslash, so don't read if you're not mature enough to handle it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Hannah Montana.
Note: Eh. I think it was a better idea than story. Anyway, the girls are 14 in this chapter. And for the sake of the story, Miley dated Jake back then even though I don't think they got together for real until she was older. Whatever. And forgive any problems with tense. I had some issues but I think I fixed them all.
First Kiss
There is something about how the darkness of night changes perception. Familiar things are suddenly shrouded in mystery as the pale moonlight casts strange, unearthly shadows in the consuming silence of night. This effect is heightened when in unfamiliar places, like I was in this moment. Not that Miley's bedroom isn't a place I frequent almost as often as my own home; I'm just normally here in the waking hours, with an occasional sleepover thrown in every other weekend.
And this happened to be one of those weekends. But rather than drifting off to sleep like my best friend, my traitorous mind was occupied by the typical fourteen-year-old drama and insecurities, refusing to let me fall prey to Mr. Sandman. Instead, my senses took in the night persona of Miley's house. There was a full moon tonight, the lunar glow shining through the slats of Miley's blinds that were blowing lightly in the open window, casting dancing shadows across the dark forms of the furniture. A muffled cough sounded through the wall from Jackson's room and I could hear Mr. Stewart strumming on a guitar somewhere in the house, the sound low and soothing. Outside, Mr. Donzig's little yippy dog barked and another dog answered its call, howling into the dark night at the full moon.
Suddenly I heard Miley sigh as she rolled onto her back next to me. "You awake?" she whispered, the pillow rustling beneath her hair as she turned her head in my direction. A faint smell of her fruity shampoo reached my nose across the small space separating us.
"Yeah, can't sleep," I whispered back. What is it about darkness that causes people to talk in muted voices?
"Me neither. I think I ate too many of those fudgy buddies we stole from daddy's private stash. My head's buzzin' with all the sugar."
Silence filled the space between us for a few minutes, the only sound the faint guitar playing and Miley's gentle breathing. It was oddly comforting and I soaked it all in to remember for another time, when I'm home in my bed all alone, my mom on another date or business trip.
I was suddenly jealous of Miley. She had it all – loving father who was home all day and cooked dinner every night; a brother who was, admittedly, annoying but had good intentions and was someone whom Miley shared her life and family experiences with; plus, an amazing career at the innocent age of fourteen; a beautiful house on the beach; and the hottest boy at school - as well as the current celebrity scene - as her boyfriend, Jake Ryan.
And then there was me – dorky skater chick with only a few close friends and nothing else. No warm loving family, no talents or hobbies or anything I could be really proud of, and especially no boyfriend. I didn't even know what it was like to be kissed.
That was one of the things on my mind which was keeping my brain from shutting down tonight, brought on by watching yet another of Miley's cheesy chick flicks that only taught me to have high and unrealistic expectations of love and happiness. And no, I'm not disgruntled, in case you were wondering.
"Miles?" I asked quietly as I took an interest in how the shadows from the blinds played on the clothes hanging in Miley's open closet. I could see the new shirts she had bought last weekend, tags still attached as they hung amidst the plethora that was Miley's wardrobe.
"Yeah?" Her response was equally quiet.
"What's it like? Kissing someone?"
Miley was silent and I was afraid she had fallen back asleep. But after several long moments and a deep breath, she finally spoke.
"Well, it's warm 'n' soft, and a little wet. But it feels amazing, kinda like you're tingling. And there are butterflies…I know that wasn't a good explanation…" Miley hesitated. "Does that answer your question?"
Miley's description definitely left some to the imagination, and I was still afraid of my first kiss. I didn't exactly know how to go about doing it.
"Yeah, it's just…what do you do? I mean, with your hands, and your lips…" I felt myself blushing and turned away from Miley. She wasn't looking at me, but I still didn't want her to see the embarrassment at my lack of knowledge on the subject.
Miley cleared her throat and took a deep breath, and for a moment I thought she was going to speak. But the only sound that filled the room was Mr. Stewart's guitar. Finally she rolled onto her side, propping her head against her upturned palm and looked down at me. I turned my head back in her direction and held her gaze as I waited for her to speak. Her eyes were dark in the black of the night and I had a hard time reading what was hidden in their depths.
"I'm not exactly experienced."
Her gaze was making me feel uncomfortable and I wasn't sure why. A lot of things about Miley left me feeling nervous and uncertain. "I know. I wasn't saying you were. I'm just scared because I don't know what to do. Tell me, Miles?"
Miley regarded me for a moment before nodding her head and lying back on her pillow, hugging it to her body. Her face was only inches from my own and I could smell the mint of her toothpaste on her warm breath as she quietly spoke. "Ok. Well, first you get real close to the other person, until you're breathin' their air. Your eyes kinda close by themselves as the distance gets smaller until your lips touch. Then you just kiss. I usually let my hand play with the hair at the nape of their neck but you can do whatever with them."
"Is it scary?" I asked as I gripped my own pillow and watched her closely. I don't know why, but the thought of kissing a boy still terrified and grossed me out.
"No, it's really nice," Miley rejoined. For a few silent moments she held my gaze and I couldn't bring myself to look away. Her eyes were veiled secrets set in a face shrouded in moonlight and mystery. I felt as if some unseen force was pulling me towards her and I simply couldn't resist. I was intrigued by their obscurity. "Do you want to try?"
The cogwheel in my brain turned several times before I fully comprehended what she had just said. If she had indeed just said it. "Crazy southern best friend, say what?"
"Yeah. Nothing like getting over your fears than just getting it over with."
Now I really was terrified. "Uhh…"
"If you don't want to kiss me, it's ok. It was just a suggestion." There was a hint of sadness in Miley's voice, and she began picking at the comforter between us.
"No, it's not that. I just…" Just what? Even I didn't know. "…You're my best friend. Won't it be kinda weird?"
Miley stopped picking at the loose thread and smoothed the fabric down, paying far more attention to her fiddling than was necessary. She kept her gaze on the blanket. "No. I don't know. I've never kissed my best friend before. And it's not like it means anything, right?"
Miley was right. What was a simple kiss between friends? I probably won't even remember it once I get my first real kiss. She was only offering to help me get over my fears.
I took a deep breath, letting the cool night air calm my nerves and clear my head. Then, with the shield of the night giving me a false sense of courage, I replied with a single word. "Okay."
"Really? You sure?" Miley's voice was warm and soothing, and with her scent surrounding me in the soft sheets, I felt safe.
"Yeah. But you can't laugh at me or anything if I do it wrong."
Miley's tone was mocking now. "Come on, Lils. Would I do that to you? And besides, it's almost impossible to screw up a kiss. Just don't slobber on me, okay?"
"Yeah, I'll try not to."
"Good." She inched closer to me, our bodies barely brushing against one another through the sheets. I could feel the radiating heat from her body and she was surprisingly warm. "Ready?"
So this was it. Miley's breath was warm against my face as I stared into her dark eyes. They looked beautiful in the gray hue of the night, and I could see only love and friendship in their depths.
"Y-yeah. I think so," I stammered. No matter how much I trusted Miley, the realization that my beautiful best friend - whom the rest of the world knew as Hannah Montana - was about to kiss me hit me like a ton of bricks. I felt like I couldn't breathe.
Miley edged even closer until our noses were scarcely touching, her voice now a husky whisper in the night. "Don't be scared, Lils. A kiss is nothing. Just close your eyes, okay?"
I swallowed thickly and could only nod in response as she brushed a bang out of my eye. With one last look into Miley's assuring eyes, I closed my own and waited.
"Breathe Lilly," came her voice from the blackness behind my eyelids.
I let out the breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding and felt, rather than heard, Miley's quiet chuckle. A breeze from the open window blew across my face and the smell of sea air mixed with the sweet intoxicating scent of Miley, relaxing me. I could sense her nearness, knew she was only inches away, but I didn't know what to expect.
There I was, lying in Miley's bed in the middle of the night while the rest of the world was sound asleep, waiting for her to kiss me. How had this happened? Have you ever had one of those moments where you take a step back and observe your life and what you're doing in that moment from the viewpoint of yourself at a different point of time in your life? Like, what would my twenty-five-year-old self think of me in this moment? Or my five-year-old self? I couldn't imagine what they'd think, though, because I'd never imagined myself kissing Miley before. Except for now. And it's all I could think about, all I could anticipate. I wondered what –
Miley's lips were suddenly on mine, pressing firmly but gently. They were warm and soft, and it felt nice. Very nice. She pulled away after a few seconds.
Cracking open my eyelids, I could see through my lashes that she hadn't moved away, and as she moved forward again I let them flutter shut. Miley's lips were slightly damp this time as she caught my upper lip between her own. I felt her feather light touch on my arm and was again amazed at the warmth of her skin. I was quickly becoming engrossed in the moment and barely realized that Miley had rolled me onto my back. Her lips were becoming more sure - more demanding - as they moved against mine, and I felt an unfamiliar fluttering in my stomach.
As if pulled by invisible puppet strings, my hands raised to her shoulders and slid along the smooth fabric of her pajama top where they found her silky hair, my fingers quickly becoming tangled in the soft curls and pulling her closer. Miley was a shock to my senses – unbelievably soft and warm, gentle, and deliciously sweet. I felt like I was falling, with nowhere to land, yet I didn't want it to stop. She was right, kissing someone did feel amazing.
But all too soon, Miley's lips left mine as gently as they'd come. I could still feel her close to me and kept my eyes closed, reveling in the warmth flooding my body and the tingling on my lips where Miley's had just been. She shifted further away, rustling the sheets as she slid her body off of mine. I felt suddenly cold without her pressed against me and the conflicting feelings left my head spinning.
"So..." Miley's voice broke through the haze and I lazily opened my eyes, slowly blinking as I focused on her face hovering next to mine.
"…So?" I repeated, unable to think of anything else to say. Seriously, my brain felt like mush as it tried to process the past few minutes of my life.
"This is usually 'bout the time you say somethin'."
"Umm…thanks Miles. It was…nice." I was starting to feel slightly awkward. Actually, I was starting to feel more than slightly awkward. In fact, it was a little hard to look her in the eyes at the moment. I just kissed my best friend, shared something intimate with her, and I'm supposed to not look at her differently? I don't think I can do that.
"Nice?"
"Well, what do you want me to say?"
"I don't know…" Miley chewed on her bottom lip as she looked down at me. "Am I a bad kisser?"
I could help but laugh quietly at her question. "You're asking the girl who has never been kissed until now whether or not you're a good kisser?"
"Well…how come it was just nice?" Jeez, Miley could be pushy when she wanted to be.
"It was nice because one, I don't have anything to compare it too. And two, you're my best friend. My girl best friend. I'm pretty sure a kiss between us isn't supposed to be anything but just nice." I let out a frustrated sigh. "Plus, aren't you supposed to be the one telling me if I suck?"
Miley grinned shyly as she lowered her head back down to her pillow, holding my gaze for a few moments before speaking. "I'm sorry. And you're right. You're also a pretty good kisser."
"Thanks Miles. You too…from what I can tell." I grinned.
Miley let out a loud yawn, scrunching her nose in the process as she rolled onto her back. "You're welcome. Okay, now I'm tired. 'Night Lils."
I couldn't help but stare at her half-turned profile, noticing for the first time how long her eyelashes were and how delicate her features looked when she was at peace. Miley Stewart was going to be one gorgeous heartbreaker.
A giant yawn of my own tugged at my lungs and I snuggled deeper into my pillow as I finally closed my eyes, taking a deep breath of Miley as I buried my face in the soft feathers. "Mmm…'Night Miles. Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs bite."
My last thought as I felt sleep creeping in around the edges of my mind was that I didn't hear the guitar anymore. And Miley smelled good. Like cherry blossoms.
Questions, comments, or concerns? I was thinking about doing this as a three-shot of different 'firsts', but not all the chapters would be rated the same, so I'm doing another trilogy. I was going to wait until I had written the other two before posting this, but I'm lazy and haven't gotten around to it…so don't expect anything soon.
