I don't think anyone's done a Pingu fanfic before! WOO!
Right: Pingu all grown up.
"Noorgh noorgh!" cried Pingu as he hung his hat up on the hat stand.
"Flubberblub gabulog shuu shuu melabubu," replied Pingu's wife.
Err... I think I should translate the penguin talk. Oh, and Pingu's wife is called Choochoo
Ok
Take Two.
"Honey! I'm home!" cried Pingu as he hung his hat up on the hat stand.
"Hi honey," replied Choochoo.
Then Pingu's 2 kids, Chinchoo and Poopoo came running out of their bedroom.
"DADDY!" they shouted, "How was your day at work?"
They clung to his stubbly legs.
"Ahh, so so," he replied, "Working at the power station isn't ideal, what with all the nuclear radiation and all, but it gets the bills paid."
"Err, honey, can I have a private word," asked Choochoo sheepishly.
"Sure thing, off to bed kids," ushered Pingu.
"YEY! BEDTIME!" cried the kids as they ran into bed cheerfully.
"I think you ought to know, I'm having an affair," Choochoo began, "It's been going on for a while now, I just thought you ought to know."
"Who is it?" asked Pingu.
"Charchar."
"Ahh."
"Yes."
"Well that's OK. It's a good thing I stopped off at the solicitors on my way home and picked up a divorce application!" said Pingu cheerfully.
"Ooh great!" cried Choochoo, "It'll be like it never happened!"
"All that's left now is to throw the kids off a bridge," sighed Pingu unhappily.
"Oh, don't worry about that," laughed Choochoo, "I'll sort that out. You'll have enough trouble as it is when I wipe you clean and you'll be left in the gutter to starve."
"Great!" exclaimed Pingu happily, "You're the greatest dear. Goodbye now. Bye kids!"
"Bye dad!" cheered the kids from their beds.
Pingu skipped out of the door taking a handily placed and tied rope with him.
"Don't forget your gun dear, in case it doesn't work," reminded Choochoo.
"Oh yes," laughed Pingu, "I knew I forgot something!"
Pingu went inside the garage to collect his gun and off he skipped into the distance.
Choochoo took a large pillow and went inside the children's bedroom. She hovered over one bed and pressed the pillow against Chinchoos face. The child squirmed and then died. She removed the pillow and saw the grinning face of Chinchoo beneath her.
"Ooh, ooh! Me next, me next!" cried Poopoo excitedly, "My turn, my turn!"
"Yes dear," sighed Choochoo, "How could I forget?"
She waddled over and smothered Poopoo. She removed the pillow and saw Poopoos psychotic smile staring up at her.
She heard a bang in the distance.
THE END
