I don't own the characters but I'm pretty sure it's an original plot.
Ok, this is my second fanfic and I'm hoping you like it. It's different from my other one; Destiny but hopefully as good or better. Review people. Thankies
Sacrifice
Preface
I'd never been a good liar. Everyone could tell when I was trying to cover something up, hide something, it was written all over my face. I gave away all the signs of lying so I learned there was no point in lying at all, when the truth always followed after very little interrogation.
I'd never been good at lying till recently, when it became necessary for the sanity of my parents, for the comfort of my friends, and for my benefit. I didn't like lying, don't get me wrong, but I had to. It was important. If I told my parents how much it was costing me I know what their reactions would be: my mum would gasp and frantically try and fix the problem which we all knew she could never fix, my dad would scrunch his eyes up and go red, trying to block out the painful memories. If I told my friends they would be even more distant, as if my pain was contagious, if I told Jacob I would see the pain it cost him every time I looked up into his eyes.
So I lied, I lied to my parents, my friends, Jacob and most of all, I lied to myself. I was getting pretty good at it. I thought that if I continually told myself I was OK, if I kept up the charade with myself which I did with everyone else, I wouldn't need to lie; eventually it would become true.
But I'm not OK and I highly doubt I ever will be.
At first, I only needed to lie about small things, like amnesia and that was solely for dads benefit. I pretended I couldn't remember anything from that night, I pretended that the glare of headlights didn't wake me in the early hours of morning, I pretended that loud noises didn't break me out in cold sweats, I pretended that I had totally blacked out all events between getting in dads car, to waking up in hospital.
And once everyone became briefly happy thinking that I didn't relive the sequence of events, that brought me to this point, in my dreams, they worried about my welfare, my mental state, how the outcome was taking its toll on me. They worried nonstop.
So I became an accomplished liar. I laughed off their questions, brushed aside their concerned looks and said "I'm fine...I'm OK...don't worry...lighten up...let it go...stop looking at me like that" all the time. It was the only way because what was worse than their worry was their pity, their pained expressions if I let my charade down momentarily. So I spent every minute of every day pretending to be fine, OK, alright...happy...
And slowly, their worry died away. Their concerned expressions turned to smiles as I grew more accomplished at lying and the mask I had put on every morning to fool them was stuck in place.
That only made it hurt more. That only made me feel like a fake.
Read and Review people
