The Christmas Karaoke Contest

A/N: This fic is not my fault. Blame David Carner for posting his own personal Christmas fic challenge and of course DC's 12 Days of Christmas got me in a Christmas song fic mood. Blame it on ne71. I really like his Chuck vs the Friendly Wager and he was nice enough to let me play in this sandbox (you don't have to read it to make sense of this, but you are missing out if you don't). Put the two together, mix in a little holiday egg nog, and viola, you get something I never thought I'd do – a second story. This doesn't fit in the Trust universe – and it's hard to place it time wise. Let's say it's Christmas time Season 4.

Here's a tip on formatting – dialogue is in "quotes", thoughts in italics and singing in bold italics.

With apologies to songwriters Joan Javits & Philip Springer and Eartha Kitt who does the definitive version of the featured song, I give you my humble Christmas gift – The Christmas Karaoke Contest.

I'm not really sure who owns Santa Baby, and I don't own Chuck - but I really do believe in them.

Really!

XXXXX

It all started when KOST, "Southern California's official Christmas station", began its seasonal programming – all Christmas music all the time.

It was nice at first. Festive. A joyous reminder of the season.

But after hearing all 259 versions of Jingle Bell Rock played 5 times each, it can grate on your nerves. Let's face it, Christmas is the season for cover songs.

That sparked a lively discussion about Christmas cover songs and who sang them better. The discussion morphed into a debate. The debate got emotional, although how you can get emotional over "Drummer Boy" by Justin Bieber & Busta Rhymes is beyond me, and turned into an argument. That's when Chuck made his first mistake. He opened his mouth.

"Some of these versions are so bad, we could do better."

Chuck must not have been looking at Sarah because his mistake triggered a memory of a lost "friendly" wager, Karaoke, Madonna - virgins - and a very evil smile that should have made him nervous if he saw it. Sarah schooled her features and proposed a karaoke contest. Put the titles of the best Christmas songs with the worst covers in a hat. Everybody picks one, prepares their version and sings it. Winner would be chosen by applause level and would have boorish bragging rights for the entire season – and the right to change the radio station at whim.

It didn't take long for them to pick the seven songs to put in the hat. Sarah had to play it cool to make sure the song she wanted Chuck to sing was part of the group without sounding too enthusiastic about it.

She needn't have worried, it was the first song Chuck suggested.

Sarah could barely suppress her wicked grin and Ellie caught a glimpse of it shooting her a look that said You're planning something evil aren't you?

Sarah just grinned and nodded.

Getting Chuck to pick the right song required nothing more than Con Artist 1.01 skills. A little sleight of hand and Sarah hid her giggle behind a cough when she heard Chuck groan.

They agreed not to disclose their song title – another part of Sarah's karaoke payback plan – and the contest would be in the courtyard next week.

XXXXX

The courtyard was decorated for Christmas with twinkling lights, red bows, holly and wreaths. Café tables with festive tablecloths and pine scented candles were set out and Devon made sure there was a fully stocked bar. The participants were mingling in their best Christmas sweaters (except for Morgan who thought ugly was the way to go), having a cocktail or two to loosen up the vocal cords.

Jeff and Lester finagled their way into the contest by promising – and delivering on – the appropriate karaoke equipment. They even brought video equipment to record the contestants.

This just keeps getting better and better. Sarah thought, finding it difficult to contain her excitement. So far her plan had been a huge success – And success is the sweetest revenge!

Morgan kicked things off with Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer, trying his best to sound like he was from the back hills of Kentucky. He even decided to ramp up the authenticity with some chewing tobacco strategically placed behind his lower right molar. Having never used chewing tobacco before, Morgan didn't really know what to do with all the … fluid … that was building up while singing, so he swallowed it, which of course made him gag and swallow the entire chew. Needless to say he didn't finish the song, but did break the land speed record to the bathroom. At least the green he turned matched his ugly Christmas sweater.

Sarah tried to get thing back on track with the song she had "picked" from the hat. Her version of Jingle Bell Rock wasn't as … flashy … as the Plastics. She didn't want to get Chuck all riled up and miss the headline moment of the night.

Maybe I'll soothe his embarrassment later and put on that little Santa outfit and sing it for him when we're alone she thought.

Predictably, Jeffster refused to go on as a single. What wasn't predictable was how good they sounded. Jeff had picked Little Drummer Boy and Lester Peace On Earth(although how that got in Sarah had no idea). Turns out Jeff has a rich baritone and Lestor's tenor didn't have to be listened to ten or twelve miles away. Their rendition was as surprisingly good as Bing and Bowie's and earned them a standing ovation, probably a bad omen for everyone in the coming days.

Sarah had to admit that Casey's rendition of O Holy Night was pretty good too. The song is difficult - it spans an octave and a half - but Casey was able handle it with ease. Choirboy Sarah thought. Equally impressive though was his ability to sustain the high notes

Huh, wonder if that has anything to do with being able to hide in Premier Alejandro Goya's wall for so long. she chuckled to herself.

Ellie did a – ahem - spirited version of All I Want For Christmas Is You which had the unfortunate effect of delaying ("I need a minute babe") Devon standing up to deliver his campy Blue Christmas, complete with hip thrusts and Elvis lip smolder. Sarah was surprised they didn't sneak off to unwrap each oth….. er, their gifts. Until she saw Ellie's devilish smile when Morgan came up to announce the next singer.

Morgan had recovered enough so he didn't look florescent green and stood tall at the microphone (at least as tall as he could) as he announced with pride to the crowd. "And now, our last performer, singing Santa Baby, my best friend in the whole wide world, Chuck Bartowski!"

Sarah sat in the front row, arms crossed, a satisfied, confident smirk firmly planted on her face. Until….

…the lights in the courtyard suddenly went out and Sarah immediately reached for one of her knives when Casey put his hand on her shoulder "It's part of the staging"

Sarah was confused. "Staging? Everyone just got up and sang."

Casey shrugged one shoulder "It's Chuck" and moved to sit in the back row.

The music began, but something was wrong.

This didn't sound like the Santa Baby she knew.

Madonna sang it, right?

It was an infantilized-Lolita take - all dumb California blonde sounding.

This wasn't that.

This is…. this is slow and sultry and provocative and …. a spotlight came on Where the hell did that spotlight come from? Sarah thought.

Chuck stepped into the spotlight, dressed in a well tailored red wine, velveteen pleuche jacket that accentuated his broad shoulders, slim fitting slacks a white shirt and a slim green tie. He made eye contact white Sarah as he reached for the mic – and

Oh my God, he smoldered

Sarah trembled

I'm in trouble.

Then Chuck started singing.

She wasn't wrong.

He didn't sound like Madonna.

And she was in trouble.

Sarah baby, I've put your presents under our tree, from me

He wasn't singing the right words either.

You've been an awful good girl

Sarah baby, let's hurry back to our place tonight

Chuck's voice sounded like Jack Daniel's Tennessee Honey, smooth and sweet, it went down so easy but burned Sarah all the way down, leaving a trail of fire.

Is it getting hot? We're outside, why is it getting hot? she thought as she reached for a napkin to dab her forehead.

Sarah baby, a brand new Porsche convertible too, not blue
I'll warm it up for you, dear
Sarah baby, let's hurry back to our place tonight

He was changing the words!

Okay, I like the change, but he's cheating.

Sarah looked around for someone to complain to when she realized that she was the only one sitting up front. Everyone had moved to the back of the courtyard.

And they were quiet.

Very quiet.

She was about to spin around when she realized Chuck was there, sitting right next to her, gently putting his hand on her cheek and directing her gaze to him.

Think of all the fun we've missed
Think of all the times that we - haven't kissed
Tonight we could be
ohso good
While I'll check off your Christmas list

Sarah focused on the word kissed and stared at his lips. They were moving alright, singing the words to the song, but her mind had them elsewhere. She started to calculate how to grab Chuck and get past everyone in the back of the courtyard and into his room when his fingers slid down her cheek, down her neck, down her arm and she just kept on sliding.

Sarah baby, you know I think you are hot – a lot
You've been an angel all year
Sarah baby, let's hurry back to our place tonight

Why was this song so long? Really, did he have to drag it out. She began wondering if the fountain would give them enough cover.

Sarah honey, one thing we really do need, the deed
To a house that's yours and mine
Sarah baby, let's hurry back to our place tonight

That seemed to snap Sarah out of her … haze?... Wait, what? A house? Yours and Mine? What?

Sarah cutie, and if you're wondering what happens next - great sex
Sign your 'x' on the line
Sarah baby, let's hurry back to our place tonight

And that put her right back. Her eyes glazed over and her mind was so preoccupied with sex, she paid no attention to the rest of lyric.

Good thing.

Let's go trim our Christmas tree
With some decorations bought for you and me
I really do believe in you
Let's see if you believe in me

Sarah's breath caught. She knew he believed in her, but hearing it, hearing him tell everyone - wherever they are - was entirely different. I do believe in you Chuck. And I believe is us. I do. I will. I do.

Sarah baby, forgot to mention one little thing, a ring….

The music just stopped, and Chuck - Chuck wasn't sitting next to her. Sarah looked around, confused – until she noticed him.

Chuck was ….. kneeling in front of her.

Holding a box.

A little red box with a gold clasp.

A ring box.

Will you be my wife? he sang softly.

Chuck undid the clasp and lifted the lid to the box and there it was.

A ring.

Not just a ring, a beautiful ring. An engagement ring.

MY engagement ring! her heart cheered

My 2.02ct Oval Knife-Edge Classic 4-Prong Engagement Ring in 14K White Gold. her spy self applauded.

Her heart gave her spy self the stink eye as it explained Spy. Remember?

Sarah baby, say yes to my proposal tonight

So we can hurry back to our place tonight

hurry back t…mhhmmmpph

Chuck wasn't able to finish his song.

It's difficult when a beautiful blonde stealth missile launches itself at you knocking you on your back. It's impossible when said missile attaches her lips to your lips in an airtight seal that would satisfy NASA for pressurization requirements when docking in space.

Eventually, the need for oxygen outweighed Sarah's need for kissing (although she knows she held her breath longer under water in Thailand once – but that's another story) and they broke apart. She looked down at her smiling …. fiancée? Wait, did I say yes? Do my actions speak louder than words?

Chuck, as usual, read her mind. "Was that a yes? Cause ya know, you didn't actually say "yes", but I kinda got the impression that…"

"Yes" she interrupted followed by a kiss, followed by another "Yes" and a kiss,

"Yes" – Kiss

"Yes" – Kiss

"Yes" – Kiss

Anyway, Chuck got the idea. If he didn't, with her last "Yes", Sarah looked down at Chuck with predatory eyes and kissed him like he had never been kissed before in his life.

The courtyard went silent, that is until Awesome, who had finally discovered what the big deal about mojitos was, let out a loud wolf whistle followed by an equally loud "Way to go Chuckster. Looks like you're ready to take the bike out for a ride, you know? Oil up that chain, hop on that seat and start pedaling away, bro. You never forget how to ride, okay? Lock it out." Devon put his fist out for Chuck to bump – and waited

– and waited

– and waited.

Finally, Ellie, who had been trying so hard to hold in a mega squeal that she was vibrating in place, gently pulled her buzzed beau's arm down saying, "Come on Devon, let's give them some privacy."

Devon obediently shuffled away mumbling "I can't believe he left me hanging."

Chuck and Sarah lips parted, like the pop of a champagne cork, both struggling to catch their breath.

In between pants, Sarah wheezed out "You said … something …. about …. sex?"

Chuck sprang up like he had just finished off a blender full of Awesome's green wonder wang potion, scooped up Sarah in his arms, took three giant steps and hurdled through the Morgan door into his bedroom, closing the window and locking it in one fell swoop behind him.

A hush fell over everyone left in the courtyard. They looked on in wonder until Jeff whispered in awe "My Hero!"

XXXXX

Sometime later in the wee hours of the morning Sarah mumbled into Chucks chest

"Where'd you get the suit?"

"Really? After all that, that's the first question you have?"

Sarah snuggled in a little tighter "Only 'cause I opened one eye and saw the jacket. How did it get on the ceiling fan anyway?"

"Enthusiasm" he chuckled. "And Roan was a big help."

"Roan? Montgomery?" Really?"

"Yeah, well he felt kinda bad about the white dinner jacket, rose and red wine thing going bad so…."

"Not as bad as I felt" Sarah groused.

"Yeah" Chuck said "but things have a way of turning around. You know, like fixed karaoke contests." giving her the Bartkowski eyebrow dance with his final words.

She giggled into his chest and lifted her hand up to admire her ring. My ring.

"Pretty clever what you did with that song. So we're engaged?"

Chuck gave one vigorous nod of his head "Yup" popping the p on his lips.

"Not how I thought you were gonna ask me." she said

"Me neither." he sounded a little … worried. "Disappointed?"

"Nope!" she said popping the p. "but if there isn't a Porsche under the tree…."

Chuck sighed saying "There isn't." sounding a bit defeated.

Sarah started to rush to reassure him she was only kidding when a set of keys magically appeared in his hand. "It's in the garage. Too big for under the tree."

She bolted up in bed, eyes wide "You're kidding? Really?"

"Really. I learned never to joke about your car in a way that could be considered detrimental. Want to go for a ride?"

"Yes" she purred as she climbed on top of him "The car can wait."

"Oooo Sarah baby" he squeaked

"Merry Christmas Chuck."

"Merry Christmas Sarah."

C'est fini!

A/N2:

"Santa Baby" is a 1953 Christmas Song written by Joan Javits (the niece of Senator Jacob K. Javits) and Philip Springer, sung originally by Eartha Kitt – easily the best version and the one I listened to while writing this. The song is a tongue-in-cheek look at a Christmas list addressed to Santa Claus by a woman who wants extravagant gifts such as sables, yachts, and decorations from Tiffany's. The song has been covered by numerous artists, including Madonna, R.E.M. (no, I'm not kidding), Sheila E., Kylie Minogue, Gwen Stefani, Miss Piggy, Taylor Swift (easily the most boring) and Michael Buble – so Chuck isn't the first guy.

Thanks again to ne71 for your continued inspiration (this is the second fic you've done that for me) and for your astute counsel "We're all playing in a sandbox with someone else's toy's anyway, so go ahead and write whatever you feel like writing." Thanks Nic ; to David Carner for inspiring a Christmas song fic, for including so much music in his stories for pre-reading and checking my fluff level – thanks David.

And to all of you reading - Happy Christmas! May your world be filled with warmth and good cheer this season and throughout the year.

Pssst Don't be shy. Write a little somethin'-somethin'…..