Noticing Mickey

Fiona Gallagher had never liked the Milkovich's very much, she disliked Mandy when she started doing Lip. She was fine with Ian being friends with the girl, because Mandy needed friends, but she didn't like Lip throwing away his future with the girl who "got around".

So when Mickey Milkovich made an appearance around her house it was unusual. It was even before Ian came back. Fiona had spotted Mickey outside their home. He would stand on the corner and stare at the house just smoking a cigarette.

Fiona's curiosity had gotten the best of her and she walked outside and looked at the spot on the house Mickey was always staring at. It was Ian, Carl, and Liam's bedroom. Fiona shrugged and went back into the house.

But Mickey's presence was on going. Fiona never asked any questions until the day Mickey knocked on the door and flat out asked for Ian. Of course, he made it seem casual, like maybe Ian owed him money, but there was something else there that Fiona couldn't figure out at the time. Something in Mickey's voice and his eyes that felt deep, but she had no clue what it was they were trying to say.

Then it was Mickey's presence at the Alibi. Fiona had gone in to talk to Kev and saw the Milkovich boy sitting at the bar wearing his best beige sweater. He was clean. Fiona had never seen any of the Milkovich's take pride in their appearances, except Mandy. But Mickey looked clean and Fiona had to admit, quite handsome.

"Why are you here, Mickey?" Fiona asked.

"Having a drink, why the fuck are you here?" Mickey asked. He stared at her for a second before knocking back the rest of his beer and asking, "You heard from Ian yet?"

"No," Fiona said.

"Well, aren't you worried? He's seventeen for fuck's sake."

"Of course I'm worried, Mickey. He's my brother. I'll always worry. Ian's never really needed anyone to take care of him. I trust him. This is something he probably needed to do."

"I'm worried," said Kev.

"Why do you care so much anyway?" Fiona asked Mickey.

But Mickey didn't answer. He looked down at the bar and away from them. Fiona didn't miss the look, which she noticed Kev had caught to. What was it? Fiona didn't know. She patted Mickey on the back and left the Alibi.

So when Ian suddenly showed up, so did Mickey. He barged right in the house without knocking and asked for Ian. Up the stairs he went to find Ian. But he didn't leave. Not that night or many to follow. Fiona figured it out when she made her usual rounds through the house at night to check on everyone.

She peeked in on the boys. Ian was sound asleep with his hand hanging off the bed. He had somehow gotten tangled in his covers. Fiona would have fixed Ian's covers, but she didn't have to. Mickey was already doing it. Fiona stood in the doorway and watched Mickey gently lift Ian's leg to pull the cover out from under it and cover him back up. He tucked the edges of the blanket under the bed so that they would be snug around Ian.

It wasn't that gesture that solved the equation for Fiona, it was Mickey holding Ian's hand while he slept and delicately lace their fingers together. Mickey was into Ian.

During breakfast, Ian's first morning back in the Gallagher home, Fiona got to see Ian's side of this. Ian stared at Mickey with heart eyes. His eyes held the smile that his sleep-heavy mouth failed to put on. Ian was into Mickey.

But it was more than that. Fiona watched them. She didn't miss the heart eyes Mickey gave Ian, or the puppy look Ian had on his face. There was something off about him, but she was just happy he was home.

When Ian stepped out it was Mickey and Fiona home with Liam. Mickey was sitting on the couch in nice jeans. He took real pride in his appearance because of Ian. He wore jeans that fit him. Fiona sat on the couch with him and slapped him on the knee.

"What the fuck, Fiona?"

"Nothing, I just wanted to show you something," Fiona said. He got out a thin photo album and turned to a picture of Ian on a little league team. She pointed to the grumpy boy in the corner giving the camera guy the finger. Mickey started laughing. "Ian came home from practice one day and told me 'the dirty boy was kicked off the team. He was pissing on first base.' He was so upset he cried for two days."

Mickey took the photo album. He touched Ian's face in the little league photo. "Fucking little carrot top. No wonder I don't remember him on the team. I forgot he used to look like that."

"You haven't changed at all," Fiona told Mickey.

"Is this your only picture of Ian?" Mickey asked.

"You want to see more?"

"Ian," said Liam crawling on Mickey's lap to look at the book. Mickey seemed bothered by the fact that Liam chose him over Fiona, but he didn't make the kid move. Fiona turned the page to a picture of Lip and Ian by the pool. Ian was shirtless. It was last summer when it was taken; Ian had beefed up over the summer.

"Ian," said Liam.

"He really likes Ian," Mickey said.

"He does!" Fiona said nudging Mickey with her elbow. She saw Mickey blush for the first time. His whole face and neck turned so red it would have matched Ian's hair.

"Yeah, okay," Mickey said, "fuck off."

When Ian got sick, Fiona really noticed Mickey. He wasn't just into her brother. He was in love with him. This was real. That was why to Fiona, Mickey was different from Mandy. Lip was never really in love with Mandy and Fiona was certain Mandy never really loved Lip, but Mickey and Ian were over the moon in love with each other.

How it came to pass she would probably never know. It wasn't any of her business how it started. She was just happy that it had. Ian had someone who could love him, and the unlovable Milkovich boy had someone who loved him. They were reasonably well matched.

Fiona processed Mickey's words, "He's fucking family," over and over until they kept her up all night. She thought of Jimmy-Steve—would he have loved her deeply enough to fight her own family for her? The thought hit her stomach like bile and she wanted to throw up. The obvious truth was no.

Fiona went to sleep thinking of Ian. She had a feeling he was in good hands.