Never Again

Summary: ...and his last words to me were, "please, please, never again."

Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist (c) Hiromu Arakawa

Rate: PG

Warnings: Elricest? Swords (really small AU)

Author's comments: So this was what I wrote for the English Exam. But not exactly, I corrected some mistakes and added a whole lot more description to this. I didn't have much time to write this during the Exam so the real version's way shorter but I'm too ashamed of the original version to show it ;

The topic was: Create a story ending with "...and his last words to me were, "please, please, never again." I don't think it's really Elricesty, but if you're going to view it that way then fine. ¬¬

I got an A!! Yay!! xD


We've been together for as long as I can remember. Well, actually for as long as he lived. He's my older brother and from the day I was born, according to him, he had always kept an eye on me not only it was because it was an older brother's duty, but because I was all he had.

As I sit here on his birthday, I wonder what it must be like in Heaven. Strange thought to have on a day like this, such a day when the flowers by the crematorium are blooming and the almost-dead willow on the other side of the hill is combing the wind, creating a strange, mourning tune. His birthdays remind me of him and our mother. I smile as I look back, it was on those days he would try to stand taller than me (as I was nearly taller than him) and my mother would pull him and I onto her lap, laughing at his attempts to get off. When I asked her why he was trying to stay away from us, she merely replied, "He's growing up."

She passed when he was nine and I, eight. Since then we were closer than brothers, some friends even saying that we had become "like two inseparable wings on a bird. Without one, there's no use of the other and flight is barred from the bird."

Indeed he was like a wing. A tender and warm wing that forever protected me. It wasn't until the day he was picked up by the Army that I wished to spread my own wings and take the both of us to a far away place with no war. But the army was lacking soldiers and the minimum age had dropped just like my fearful heart had when I found out he was obliged to fight. How many tears had marked the coming of my greatest fear, I do not remember. But the next day he was up and gone, leaving me like a loose string on a big winter coat.

I didn't mean to go after him. I could have told myself that he was strong, that I couldn't keep on depending on his protection, that it was about high time I moved on. But my wings had already spread, encasing myself. Feathers whispering against my shivering skin that I must fight back. War wasn't going to separate us, no! If I can bring him back, and take him away to a safe place then I can prove myself worthy of him and I'll have passed the test. I could happily leave him in that place and I can go on with my life in a separate way.

How proud he'd be. How proud he'd be.

It was easy at first, I just changed my age to a year older, got in and was automatically appointed to a different unit than my brother since I was not as heavily packed as he was. But I had kept a careful eye on him as he had before, fighting side by side with him without being neither close nor seen. This went on for a year, two months, and sixteen days.

Suddenly, there was a panic in the Army. They had lost a big battle, units needed to be upgraded to the front. All soldiers, inexperienced, sick, injured, shell shocked, anyone that can stand on their two feet were sent to the front. In the confusion, I was accidentally placed in the same unit as my brother. But he did not notice me; war had given him glazed eyes that blocked everything but survival in his sight.

The enemy was coming, and none of us were ready. Only my brother and other victims of shell shock and fear stood numbly in place, waiting for orders. Finally, the generals could not calculate timing and with a "Forward, march!" we stepped forward towards our fate.

My comrades fell on either side of me but I only had eyes for my brother. A fire of determination to live, that only I could identify, burned in his eyes. We marched closer and close, until we had reached the point where we unsheathed our swords.

The fight began.

I do not remember much of the fight but every time I dodged a fatal blow, I thanked Luck. Now I know that it was Fate, because I was meant to survive long enough to experience a stomach dropping thought that he was wounded. Sure enough, I whirled around and there he was, pinned to the muddy ground on his back by a sword lodged into his stomach. It was only afterwards that I noticed that it was blunt and the attacker had a lot of strength to drive that through his body to the ground. As soon as I trailed the hand on the hilt to the body, my own sword had found its target. It wasn't until his body hit the ground, did I hear the echo of my scream reflecting off the bodies of the dead. A few seconds of silence followed my cry, not a single clash of swords heard in the distance. Then, like a trigger, the enemy retreated, tumbling, tripping, running, jumping over the bodies.

I did not know that I had killed the person who had brought the war.

I fell to my knees before my brother and he immediately recognized me. He gave me a weak smile in response to my trembling hands cupping his face and my silent, dry, open mouth watered by my tears. I couldn't meet his eyes and I bent my head over, sobbing uncontrollably into his chest, my own heaving over the hilt that was slowly killing him.

I couldn't think.

"Hey, bro."

I continued to cry. Trying to stop the tears proved to be useless.

"You did it…my little brother ended the war. My only family…" He coughed and blood drenched the front of his uniform.

I grabbed the blood and in vain tried to push it back into his mouth, desperation causing me to do the impossible. Already his blue uniform was turning red.

"Don't talk, brother. It's all right. We'll get out of here and I'll take you to a safe place. You'll see, it will be all right. We'll be happy. Just don't die!" Panic gripped my voice and clutched my chest, equally squeezing more tears out of my eyes. But I couldn't fight it off. I didn't want to. I believed at the moment that I will suffocate from lack of oxygen, all because my heart's broken pieces were clogging all access to air.

"You're not even supposed to be here. But you've made me proud, just remember that. Don't worry little brother, I'll be waiting…"

"Waiting where!?" He let his head loll backwards, making my voice crack in surprise. "Brother!? BROTHER!"

I made him proud, I took him to a paradise, he gave me a chance to live without him. My wishes were half coming true and it was all my fault.

"Don't you come chasing after me," he gasped. I leaned in, wanting to tell him how sorry I was, but my anguish had silenced my voice. "Don't. Or my death would've been for nothing. Please, little brother. Don't go chasing after people. Live your life, don't run after me again...there's a reason why people go and come back. Don't go chasing…ever." His eyelids fluttered and closed, his breaths becoming shallower and shallower.

And his last words to me were, "Please, please, never again."