Nightmares Excellent Adventure

We all know the stories by now. Nightmare is the evil guy from SC2 ( Soul Calibur 2 for all you retards out there). He's got an evil sword named soul edge. Its got an eye ball on it and it really makes you tempted to poke it with a stick. If you like SC2, Jackass, and Ferris Beulers day off then here's your story.

Day 1: The Birthday

Today it is nightmare's daughters birthday ( I know it's shocking). And just to make it more worse she's goin through PMS. Nightmare is at the local Wal-Mart trying to buy his daughter a present.

"Hi im looking for a present for my daughter" says nightmare.

" Really? good for you. How old is she?" says clerk.

" I have no fricken clue. Whats the age where they get really bitchy?"

"18?" says clerk.

"Bingo!!!!"

" You know I have a son who is eighteen. He's a goof. He runs off into the middle of the night and gets drunk. Then goes and gets high and OD's on heroin. He's a bastard but I still love him as a kid you know. But he's lik……"

Nightmare is singing in his head " love and marriage, love and marriage. Go together like a horse and carriage. This I tell you brother. You can't have one without the other. Love and marriage, love and marriage." (this is the married with children theme)

"So does she like jewelry?" clerk says.

"Oh sure I guess…" says nightmare.

"Well we have this really nice diamond ring. For only 40000$!"

"………..hahahahahahahaha……..no."

Nightmare then bitch slaps her across the face with his mutant hand and walks out.

"God damn clerks thinking they're al that and a bag of potato chips!"

"Now what will I get her man…."

"Wait I know exactly what to get her…"

Back at the house.

"Nathalie come down here." yells nightmare.

"Yah dad" says Nathalie.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

"Oh yay thank you daddy"

Nathalie open up the box.

"It's….keys?"

"Ya the thing they go in is outside"

Nathalie gasps, runs outside and see's a….

"It's a donkey.."

"Oh ya!"

"Then what are the keys for?"

Nightmare takes the keys and looks at the donkey.

"Uhhh wait here is is!"

Nightmare takes the keys with his big mutant hand and shoves em up the donkeys ass.!

I know short chapter more comin soon.