Genre – Angst/Romance

Format –1st person speech (strange je sais)

Couplings – Joey/Chandler

Warnings – slash, cynicism, possibility of character death, foul language

A/N PLEASE READ – OK, so this was a strange one. I copied the technique by a remarkable story; 'Insomnia' by paranoidkitten which you will find in my favourites. The idea is that you read one side of a dialogue, in this case from the point of view of Chandler. I feel that the story itself is a little long for style, but, meh, I can't seem to cut it, so up it goes.
This is set some time during Season 2 or 3? Ross and Rachel are together, as are Monica and Richard.
Also I'm aware that Chandler doesn't swear this much in FRIENDS, and my Beta reader (Moose, who I am as always eternally grateful to) pointed this out. I am aware of this and would like to explain that in this fic the amount Chandler swears is directly proportional to the amount of emotional stress he's under, so fuck is basically a Chandler's-mental-state-o-meter. Thanks, enjoy and REVIEW as always.

Summary – The One Where Chandler Loses his Mind

The One Where Chandler Loses his Mind

Chapter I
- Hey Mon.

-Yeah, I'm OK.

-Yes I'm sure! Why?

- Oh – yeah I've been sleeping alright. Well, as 'alright' as I can under the circumstances.

- It's kind of hard to get that much sleep when you've got Joey in the next room practicing his horizontal jogging techniques all night. It's alright for him; 'Days of Our Lives' don't seem to want him in the studio until midday.

- Nah, I don't need any sleeping pills, I'll be fine.

- I know, I know, I just… I don't need pills or anything.

- Thanks for your concern though, I'll see you later.

---

- Hey Joe.

- Why do people keep asking me that? Yes I'm fine.

- Yeah alright, what you want to do?

- Well, maybe we could just stay in and get pizza.

- No we don't, we always go out and you pick up some dumb chick from a bar and spend all night… connecting.

- Well sometimes I get fed up with the emotionally unstable train-wreck of a friend. And besides, I have work tomorrow.

- OK, OK. But try to restrain yourself.

---

- Joe?

- Yeah, when I said restrain yourself I meant bring less than two women back to the apartment.

- Really? One's for me?

- No… I knew you were kidding.

- Look, can you just try and keep the noise down tonight, I'd really like some sleep for once.

- Well can't the Joey love be quiet Joey love?

- Oh get over yourself.

---

- Mon?

- Yeah, I'm thinking about taking your advice, about the sleeping pills I mean.

- I keep zoning out at work, my secretary had to slap me to get me out of my chair when the fire alarm went off.

- No, nothing serious, one of the janitors tried to smoke up in the photocopy room again. A stoned man, fire and a room full of paper is like Page 1 of 'The Beginners Guide to getting fired from your job and being jailed for arson'.

- Well then my boss told me that I'd been acting strange lately and if I didn't pull myself together he may have to 'let me go'.

- I know I hate my job, but I can't just quit!

- Because it's the only job I've got, and who else is going to pay for Joey's headshots when he gets fired off 'Days of Our Lives'?