Sound of Pulling Heaven Down
There's no body, not really. And I guess I like that, because without a body, there is no blood. No flesh to be torn, muscles to be pulled, no bones to be broken. No pain. God knows I've had my share of it.
Instead, I simply see, I feel and I relish in this warming glow. This softness. This comfort. I feel like a newborn, swaddle in white silk beside her mother. My mother is just softness and warmth, just her scent of fresh rain, of lilacs.
Time doesn't exist here. It just doesn't seem to pass. But the scenes are ever changing, becoming whatever we wish.
The beach, with crystal blue water sparkling and glittering, crashing with foaming white waves against the sandy shores. The scent of sweet dune grass and salt mingling with the warmth of the sun above, the silky sand tickling my toes as we simply sit side by side and enjoy it. We don't have to worry about getting home, about being elsewhere. We can just stay here. Forever.
Then we're atop a mountain, rocks jut out beneath us as the fall seems to go on forever, the cliffs of stone grey with blotches of bright white snow. Evergreens paint the land with deep green, rivers and lakes crisscross with shining blue's like stitches across the land. The air is fresh and crisp. I feel more alive here than I ever did in life.
But when we don't want to be anywhere in particular, we seem to just… dissolve. To become our essence at its purest. And sometimes I see nothing; it's almost like the most blissful sleep, sleep where darkness never comes. Other times I let this place or maybe some being, take us to see things. It's then I see the greatest things.
The swish of waves above me as blues of every sort surround me, flashes of light as the sun dances in the sky above. A school of fish flashes silver, I hear the beautiful call of a whale, I see exotic oranges, yellows, reds, greens, blues and purples painting the coral reef. But I don't have to worry about drowning here. I don't breath, I'm not a body in the ocean, I'm a soul in depths of the deep blue sea.
Puffs of fluffy cotton candy, they look as soft as pillows, as smooth as velvet. Bright white and clean clouds against the ever expanding cerulean sky. To fly is to be free, and that is what I am. Free.
Little specks of bright white lights surrounded by misty darkness and lavished with every color of the spectrum. Sparkling, glittering, shimmering as they dance with eternal passion. Those near me are huge, bigger than anything on earth, they are burning bright, pulsing with life and feeding the ever growing universe.
I laugh as fly through the stars. My essence carried through the universe, witness to pure beauty, to these magnificent creations, to this euphoric existence that is truly living. That is truly being, that truly feels happiness and warmth and comfort and love.
Then I feel the weight, the tug, the pressure of something coming close. Then it's on me, icy sharp claws clutch my essence, plucks it right from the sky as I soar, like a wounded bird I fall. All those things I left behind flood back into me. Fear grips me tight, anguish rips me apart, agony engulfs me and pain fills me as everything races away. I hear nothing but a screaming wind, or maybe it's my soul screaming as it's dragged to hell. Or maybe it's the sound of pulling heaven down…
…
I wrote this after watching many sad Buffy videos. As I neared the end I remembered the song the "Sound of Pulling Heaven Down" by Blue October and thought it would be a good title. Curious I looked up the lyrics and was shocked to find they matched my fic almost EXACTLY. Not kidding you, I had not heard this song in years! Must be a subconscious thing…
