AN: Here we go again; another one-shot. This time I've tried to dive into the head of Arizona in the last Calzona scene of 6x24. Hope you'll like it.
Once again I've used the original lines of Callie and Arizona to make it real; hope I'll be able to do the scene justice.

Disclaimer: All rights and characters belong to Shonda Rhimes.


My pulse is still throbbing, even though it's all over with and the man who shot is gone, even though I'm sending Ruby off with an ambulance to another hospital. I know I did a good job, I know I did the best a surgeon could possibly do under such circumstances. But something still makes my heart pound and it's not the fact that I'm scared; not anymore. I know that whatever I have to do, I need to do with my heart completely in it. And I know the woman standing beside me still holds my heart, actually I've never claimed it back – it's hers forever, as long as she'll have it. I just don't know how to tell her that I'll do whatever she wants me to do as long as we do it together; as long as we face it together. I know we'll be able to move even the biggest mountains because the love I hold for her is nothing I've ever felt before, and if the love she feels for me is half as strong as that – we'll be able to do anything. Even get through this barrier of different opinions of our future. Being threatened on your life does that to you, I suppose. Though I'm sure I knew all along that I couldn't stay away from Callie, that I wouldn't be able to truly live without having her in my life – and with that life suddenly threatened, it hit me straight in the all the chambers of my heart and I just knew it. She didn't even have to stand up for me, for Ruby, for me to know that I would throw away all my reservations against having children to be with her again – but the way Callie so bravely faced the gunman made all my doubts about her not being in love with me disappear. And I swear I couldn't have been more afraid. The thought of him killing the woman I love so fiercely and not being with her, mixed with the fear of her being gone and leaving me to forever mourn the loss, and regret that I couldn't get over myself and give the woman I loved the child she desperately needed. I couldn't bear that, I couldn't live like that. And that's why I'm here now – that's why I'm here, trying to figure out how to tell Callie that I love her. That I can't stop loving her.

I still feel her hand across my cheek, I still feel the burning of my tears on that same cheek. But just as much or even more, I feel the love and caring she poured right into me in that moment, telling Ruby that everything would be okay because I was there. I didn't even know she felt like that which has left me breathless and speechless...again. And I don't really know where to go from here. I know that I don't want to go another minute without knowing that she is mine, knowing that I can be in those arms again and feel her lips caress mine again. As the ambulance take off, leaving me alone on the pavement with the most beautiful woman in the entire world, I turn to look at her and I'm immediately taken in by her constant beauty. I let a deep breath escape my mouth with a sigh, locking my eyes with those of deep, swirling chocolate before me. And it's like she sees right through me, reads my deepest fears and as I go to pull my soul away she drags me in closer using the perfection of her facial expression.

Not being able to handle it anymore I give her a weak jerk with my head and a soft smile. "I'm gonna go see if kids need help finding their parents," is my getting away card because how am I able to look at her knowing I can't hold her, knowing I can't love her the way I want to? I need to find a place to calm my heart, think all this through, find a way to spill my revelation to the love of my life. Because I need to do so if I want to survive, if I want to keep breathing – and with both of us breathing and living right now, I won't ever let something as surreal as a shooting be the only way for me to see clear. Callie will help me see further on, and I can only hope she will do so. But right now all I'm grateful for is Callie's shaky breath and the beating of her strong, caring and big heart – it gives me the most powerful reason to breathe as well. So, running away with the tail between my legs, I leave love behind.

"People died," Callie states which makes me turn around. "People are dead. I – I don't wanna have kids if it means I can't be with you," Callie tells me, the love in her words mirroring exactly what's in my heart. And the sacrifice in those words makes me love her even more, it makes me want to forever keep her from getting hurt because she constantly protects me, she never falters to love me with no reservations – and that is something to be even more thankful for, for the rest of my life. My heart pounds with a force I haven't felt in a long time as I set my mind on the time to come clean, to finally tell Callie that all I want is for her to be happy and I'm in for whatever that happiness contains.

"No. No. We'll have kids. We'll have all kinds of kid," and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. I'll have as many kids as she wants because having a bunch of tiny Calliopes running around isn't a bad thing, in fact it's a very, very beautiful thing. And I'm all set for it, I will give the woman that I love what makes her happy and I will try the best I can to be the parent I never dreamt of being. I will…because I love her, and I can honestly say that I will love whatever we make, or decide or choose – and that because everything with Callie is everything I need. Everything I need evolve around this perfect woman, and I will make the greatest effort on being whatever she's dreamed about her entire life. I just hope it's enough.

"And I always thought I wasn't cut out to be a mom, but…you'll be a great mom. You'll be an amazing mom," I release all the words that has been floating inside my head the last couple of hours or days or weeks, I don't know. I just let go because I know whatever Callie will do, she'll do it with such a grace that'll take my breath away again and again. That kind of breathtaking I don't mind because it's the kind that makes me know I'm breathing, that I'm so much alive that it hurts. The good kind of hurting. And the way Callie lets a shaky breath leave her throat and lets her eyes softly glisten with unshed tears of joy, I know that she is on the same path as me. She's on the exact same road where love is the only destination. And if that destination holds a child, then bring it!

"And…I love you so much and I can't live without you and our ten kids," and the moment I've been yearning and almost died for arrives as Callie crashes her lips on mine in pure passion. My whole body explodes with relief and gratitude, with love and hope, as Callie tangles her hand in my hair while keeping me in place by my neck. I want to feel all of this woman; her heart race under her smooth skin, her silky hair between my fingers, her lips on every part of my body. I just can't get enough of feeling her, not to mention the way her tongue seeks out every nook and cranny in my mouth. This is why I was placed on Earth; meeting this woman and loving her, feeling the indescribable loss when I lost her and now feeling the never-ending love pouring from my mouth and into hers, Callie giving me the exact same nectar as we reunite. That is what it's all about, dying a little to know that you actually are able to live because of that. After all, we are not dead – we are so very much alive, and I intend on staying like that as long as Callie lets me love her.


I'm actually in a pondering state to find out if I should make this a two-chapter fic, because this scene is pretty much shown from both perspectives; so could be interesting. Let me know if you want me to :-)