Title: Vongola Decimo is dating WHO?

Summary: A rumor is spreading like fire across the Mafia. Twenty-one year old Vongola Decimo is DATING. It's a rush to protect his chastity (and bash whoever he is dating)!

Disclaimer: Katekyo Hitman Reborn! belongs to Akira Amano

Pairing: ?27

Warning: Crack! Also, rated for suggestiveness. Very, very suggestive suggestiveness.

Beta'd by Lightning515.


Vongola Decimo is dating WHO?!

A rumor is spreading like fire across the Mafia.

Twenty-one year old Vongola Decimo is DATING.

It's a rush to protect his chastity (and bash *cough*kill*cough* whoever he is dating)!

Sawada "Tsuna" Tsunayoshi, 10th Vongola Sky Guardian, Vongola Decimo, sighed. Beside him, Reborn, Sun Arcobaleno and world's greatest hitman, chuckled. Tsuna covered his face with a hand and groaned. Reborn spared him a glance and smirked.

Tsuna huffed and glared at his former tutor. "Really? An entire ball, just for that?!"

"Apparently." Reborn nodded.

"Why are they so concerned with whoever I'm dating?!" Tsuna fumed as he glared at the entire ballroom.

Some who met his glare flinched and quickly turned away; others merely smirked and continued mingling. Tsuna huffed and crossed his arms, defiantly glaring at anyone who dared to near the utterly and completely pissed off Vongola Decimo. Screw the formalities and courtesies; it's not like this is a formal business ball or anything. It was an impromptu ball, spurred by none other than the rumors that Vongola Decimo was now dating. Tsuna refused to comment on the matter, be it if he was dating or who he was dating.

And because of that, the Tenth Generation Vongola Guardians actually planned and called a ball for the Mafia ―an entire friggin' ball!

Just about all the entire bleeping Mafia was called: From all of Vongola (including CEDEF and Varia) to the closest allies (like the Shimon Famiglia and the Cavallone Famiglia) to the not-so-close-but-still-kind-of-close allies (like the Bovino Famiglia and the newly-reformed Millifiore Famiglia) to those who are simply in the Alliance (like the Triad 6 Famiglia, Tomaso Famiglia, Difo Famiglia, Nuevo Famiglia, Beccio Famiglia and the Leilei Brothers) to those who are allies but not in the Alliance (the Arcobaleno) and some random Families (like the Momokyokai Yakuza and the Carcassa Famiglia). Heck, even the Vendice showed up ―the Guardians swore no one called them; apparently, even the Vendice were interested in the Vongola Decimo's dating life.

Tsuna didn't know if he should be impressed or horrified.

And speaking of the Guardians, Tsuna has yet to see any single one of them since the ball started. It wasn't exactly surprising. The Guardians probably figured that organizing an entire ball just to find out their Boss' lover just because their Boss has repeatedly declined to reveal the name was probably more than enough to piss off the Vongola Decimo thrice over. And since Tsuna had once, rather gleefully, informed them that he is Vongola Decimo and that he can make their lives miserable (just that he chose not to), the Guardians wisely figured that showing their faces to their Boss in the ball was probably an even worse idea than hosting the ball.

Tsuna scowled. If he saw any one of his Guardians right now, he was liable to commit murder.

"It seems that they are more concerned about your chastity." Reborn remarked, chuckling at the murder intent rolling off his student. Rather interestingly, the same murder intent was the reason why many dare not approach the seething Vongola Decimo to ask about The Question.

Tsuna blushed. "My sex life ―lack of thereof or otherwise― is none of their business, thank you very much."

"Try telling them that then." Reborn chuckled.

Tsuna groaned. "Aren't you interested, Reborn?" He arched an eyebrow questioningly.

Reborn merely smirked and walked away, disappearing into the crowd. Tsuna figured the hitman would either be looking for the Ninth Vongola Generation or the Arcobaleno, or even ―Tsuna shuddered― gathering blackmail material.

Tsuna groaned quietly, "Someone save me…"

"It's not that bad."

Tsuna cracked an eye open. "…D-Dino… nii…" The Vongola Decimo whimpered, launching and burying himself in Dino's open arms.

The older blond chuckled, gently stroking Tsuna's hair as he spoke, "What's wrong? This ball isn't satisfactory?"

"Dino-nii…" Tsuna spoke, though it came out muffled with the brunette's face still buried in Dino's chest. "Please don't make me personally introduce the beautiful floor of my estate to your face. We're on the second floor."

Dino gulped and wisely reined in his teasing side. "Alright, alright. I won't tease. Just take it like any other ball: endure until it's over."

"How can I?" Tsuna's head shot up as he huffed. "I have practically the entire Mafia here! And all of them are after me!"

"You could end this earlier if you just told us who it was…" Dino replied.

"Dino-nii…!" Tsuna groaned. "Not you too…"

"Hey! I need to know who's the bastard that stole my cute little otouto's vi―"

Tsuna slammed a hand onto Dino's mouth, effectively cutting the blond off. As he glared, killer intent flared from him, making him every bit of the Don of the most powerful Family in the Mafia in that moment. "Dino-nii. If you ever finish that sentence, I'll make sure you won't just see the beautiful concrete floors of my estate, you'll also meet the nice soil of the forest surrounding the estate." Tsuna growled. Dino nodded, several muffled words spilling from his lips, which Tsuna roughly translated to, 'Sorry. I'll stop. Really.' Humming in satisfaction, Tsuna pulled back.

Dino looked a little pale as he asked, "Umm, Kyouya is here, right?"

"Yeah." Tsuna nodded, gesturing at the crowd. "He's somewhere in there."

"Okay. I'll… just go find him. Or maybe I'll go find Reborn. Haven't seen my old teacher in a while." Dino mumbled.

As Dino left, disappearing into the crowd, Tsuna crossed his arms and pressed himself up against the cold hard wall of the ballroom. The brunette figured that he might as well attempt and fail spectacularly at melting into the wall ―it was honestly a better option than going into the information-hungry crowd of Mafiosi. Come to think of it, who was the one who spread the rumor that the Vongola Decimo was dating? Tsuna growled; if he found out who that idiot was, he was so abusing his Don Vongola title and throwing him to the Vendice.

…Unless it was the Vendice themselves, in which case he'll send his fight-hungry Cloud Guardian after them.

Speaking of Vendice, here comes the Boss of Vendice, one Bermuda von Veckenschtein, was swiftly approaching in all his adult ―or was it teen?― glory, flanked by none other than his Second-in-Command, Jager. The two bowed in respect as Bermuda greeted, "Vongola Decimo. Congratulations."

Tsuna groaned, "Bermuda, you know, don't you?"

Bermuda gave a wry smirk. "It is the job of the Vendice to make sure the laws of the Mafia are strictly followed. Naturally, that means that we keep a close eye on all those involved in the Mafia." Bermuda answered professionally. "Therefore, I hereby offer my congrats on… both of the matter."

Tsuna blushed, "You…!"

"Vongola Decimo need not worry." Jager spoke. Tsuna was absolutely sure that the man was smirking gleefully under all those bandages. "After this ball, what Boss saw will no longer be a secret."

"If the Vendice already knows, then why the hell are you here?!" Tsuna demanded.

"Isn't it obvious?" Bermuda chuckled. "Our form of surveillance has always been… dull. We thought it was a good opportunity for us to do a… personal surveillance."

Personal, my ass. They just want to see the entire Mafia in an uproar. Tsuna's eyebrow twitched. "How… thoughtful of you."

"Not at all, Vongola Decimo." Jager gave a mock bow. "It is only our duty."

"Well now, we shall take our leave." Bermuda announced. "Your next… guests are here, after all."

Tsuna slapped a hand over his face as he watched the two Vendice leave, groaned when the next inquirer came. "If you care about me and the Vongola, then help me destroy this blasted ball, Enma." Tsuna sighed; was everyone really deadset on finding out who he was dating? It's not like they could do anything about it even if they know…

The Shimon Decimo smiled, "Tsuna-kun, everyone is just concerned." Enma chuckled when his dear friend groaned. "I'm rather curious too. About this person… and why you are keeping it a secret. The other person doesn't want to tell?"

"The other person's fine with it. It's just…" Tsuna paused, pondering over his next words. "I'm Vongola Decimo. It's like I can't have anything private. I can't even date in peace!" The brunette groaned out, running a hand through his messy hair. "And I'm not so sure if everyone's 'just concerned'. They all look like they want to kill whoever I'm dating."

"Well, knowing Tsuna-kun, you wouldn't date anyone outside the Mafia, so I'm sure whoever it is can defend themselves." Enma replied.

"I know that person definitely could." Tsuna smiled. "Doesn't mean I want to subject that person to it."

Enma glanced at the smile on Tsuna's face. It was faint, yet, Enma could see that Tsuna loved that person every much. If it was Tsuna, the brunette definitely loved that person with all of his heart. Enma gave a small smile of his own, his crimson eyes softening as he stared at his dear friend. That smile on Tsuna's face… It made him… "…so jealous."

"Ehh?"

"I'm… so jealous of that person." Enma clarified. "Because if Tsuna-kun falls in love with someone, Tsuna-kun will definitely… pour all his love into it…"

Tsuna blushed lightly, "E-Enma…"

"Tsuna-kun? Will you be telling us your secret lover by the end of this ball?" Enma asked.

Tsuna sighed and leaned back into the wall. "To be honest, I really want to keep it a secret. It's practically the only thing left private of me. But…" Tsuna glanced out into the ballroom, watching as people interacted, danced and ate; listening as the murmurs and laughter spread all over the great hall. Tsuna saw the inquisitive looks shot at him as well as the other guests and heard the speculations of the crowd. The brunette sighed, "…I suppose… that's not possible."

Enma gently wrapped an arm around his best friend, "Sorry, Tsuna-kun."

"Now I see why Primo rejected all offers until he retired." Tsuna joked pathetically.

"…Ano, Tsuna-kun… The person you're dating… is it…" Enma whispered into Tsuna's ear.

Tsuna's blush gave Enma all the answer he needed. "H-How did…"

"If one really knows Tsuna-kun, then by calming down and carefully thinking it through, there are really only a few people that Tsuna-kun would date; you can count them with one hand." Enma smiled.

"I supposed you're right about that." Tsuna sighed.

"Don't worry about it, Tsuna-kun." Enma said. "If Tsuna-kun really loves that person, we'll all understand and support you; especially your Guardians and the Cavallone Decimo. Of course, myself and the Shimon Famiglia will also support you to the very end. To us, your happiness is much more important than our own feelings, after all."

"Thank you, Enma." Tsuna smiled brightly.

"It's alright, Tsuna-kun. It's what friends do." Enma replied. "Well, I have to go now. I'm under orders to mingle around more, since the Shimon Famiglia is a relatively new addition to the Alliance. Any recommendations?"

"Go look for Dino-nii. He knows just about everyone here. You might have to find Kyouya though; Dino-nii said he was going to look for him." Tsuna answered.

Enma couldn't help but cringe at the name of the Vongola Cloud Guardian. Years may have passed since high school, but the memory of the terror of the head of the Namimori Disciplinary Committee was still clear in the Shimon Decimo's mind. Unlike Tsuna, who had long since become used to the raven's antics (Tsuna had to, being the Don of Vongola), Enma was still not comfortable around the now-Foundation leader, preferring to steer clear of him as much as possible. Tsuna could only give his dear friend an apologetic and sympathetic smile as the redhead pulled himself into the crowd.

Tsuna sighed when he saw two whiteheads coming towards him, barely a minute after Enma left. "Yuni-chan, Byakuran-san." He greeted.

The two Dons of the Millifiore Famiglia smiled; one in teasing and one in kind as they both returned the greeting. While Yuni stood at a comfortable distance from Tsuna, Byakuran moved over to practically glomp the Vongola Decimo, pulling the poor brunette into a (almost deadly) hug.

"B-Byakuran-san…!" Tsuna winced as he tried, but failed, to get the marshmallow-lover off him.

"Mou, Tsuna-chan! Yuni-chan is being mean!" Byakuran pouted. "She knows who your mysterious little lover is, but she wouldn't tell me, even when I offered my marshmallows."

"That's because Yuni-chan here doesn't have an unhealthy obsession with marshmallow like you." Tsuna grumbled, shooting the Sky Arcobaleno a grateful smile. "And Byakuran-san, please cut down on your marshmallow intake. Kikyo-san nearly got a heart attack when he saw the amount of marshmallow you ordered."

Byakuran whined petulantly as he rubbed his face into Tsuna's fluffy brown locks, "I am cutting down! It's not as bad as the amount of meat Xanxus-chan eats. You should tell him off too."

"Been there, done that. He threw a bottle of whisky at me, and proceeded to demand that I pay for the damages. I shot an X-Burner in his face." Tsuna deadpanned. "Oh, for the love of― Byakuran-san! Will you stop rubbing against me like an animal in heat?!"

"But Tsuna-chan's hair is so fluffy! Like marshmallows!" Byakuran replied brightly.

Beside them, Yuni burst into uncontrollable giggles as she covered her mouth with a hand. "Byakuran-san. Do let go of Tsunayoshi-san. He is dating someone."

"Nuh-uh." Byakuran pouted, hugging Tsuna to himself even more tightly. Tsuna cringed; the brunette was beginning to feel a little… sexually harassed. "I'm not letting go until Tsuna-chan tells me who it is."

Tsuna groaned. By now, the entire ballroom was becoming eerily quiet as the guests stared at the three Skies of the Tri-ni-Sette. Tsuna didn't even want to think of what his lover was thinking right now, or what that person would do to him later. Besides, he didn't have time to think of that ―not when Byakuran was currently trying to hug him to death. Tsuna couldn't help but thought of how humiliating it would be if he, Don of the friggin' Vongola Famiglia, was hugged to death. The brunette toyed with the idea of blasting a XX-Burner in the Don Millifiore's face, but decided that the damages (since a XX-Burner had enough power to decimate at least half ―if not all― of the ballroom) weren't worth it. For starters, the damages would be coming out of his own pocket, but more importantly, it would mean more paperwork.

…Yep. Definitely not worth it.

Still, if Tsuna didn't think of a way to get out of the marshmallow-addict's grasp, he would be doomed in more ways than one. After all, even if he did survive an attempt on his life by hugging, the after-punishments… let's just say it was torture worthy of hell. Seeing that Byakuran was hugging him in a way that did not let him get to his gloves, and he doubted a roar in Byakuran's face by Natsu would work. He could attempt to rid Byakuran of his family jewels, but unfortunately, being a male himself, Tsuna found that too cruel to execute (damn him and his softness). Which means…

"…Fine." Tsuna sighed. "Fine!" He repeated, this time in a shout that gathered the last of the attention of the guests. "Let me go, and I'll show you who it is."

"Promise?" Byakuran asked childishly.

"…I swear it on Primo's grave." Tsuna sighed.

Byakuran giggled ―Tsuna swore the marshmallow-lover giggled― and happily released Tsuna from his death-grip. Tsuna groaned and gently shifted his body a little to get his blood flowing again. Straightening up, Tsuna strode purposefully into the crowd, chocolate brown eyes, tinged with the slightest bit of orange, glanced around the crowded ballroom for his lover. It didn't take him long ―be it with the help of his Hyper Intuition, or how he was used to finding his lover in crowds― and Tsuna readjusted his destination. The crowds made way whether he went, and soon he approached a small group hanging around the back of the ballroom.

In a flowing, graceful movement, Tsuna circled around his lover and pressed their lips together. The crowd burst into furious murmurs, but all those melted into white noise in the background as Tsuna wrapped his arms around his lover's neck, bringing them closer together. Tsuna gave a low growl when he felt the other smirk against his lips, only for that growl to turn into a groan when the brunette felt arms sneak around his waist just as his bottom lip was nibbled on. Tsuna parted his mouth almost instinctively, moaning when a familiar tongue shoved its way into his mouth. The crowd was silent once more, too shocked at the identity of Vongola Decimo's lover and the fact that the couple was making out ―rather hotly, they might add― in public; though all of this escaped Tsuna's mind as he was thoroughly lost in the intensity of the make-out session.

Tsuna couldn't help but give a small chuckle; so his lover was jealous. The other growled, displeased by Tsuna's amusement, and proceeded to ravish the brunette utterly senseless. Tsuna could barely feel his legs by the time the two finally broke apart, breathing in deeply for air. He laughed at the dumbfounded looks on the guests' faces, collapsing against his lover, who wrapped an arm around his waist to support him.

In the stunned crowd, a figure began to move until he finally broke through. Kozato Enma, Shimon Decimo, smiled and spoke, "I forgot about this till just now, but congratulations, Tsuna-kun, Reborn-san."

Reborn smirked and tilted his fedora forward, both in greeting and in gratitude. Tsuna, on the other hand, smiled brightly as he answered, "Thank you, Enma."

"R-Reborn…?"

Reborn's smirk widened, if possible. "Why, hello there, idiot student number one." Reborn greeted pleasantly, sending a shiver down everyone's spines. "I was planning on looking for you."

"Umm…" The Cavallone Decimo said meekly. "W-What… Whatever for, my dearest teacher?"

"Well, I do recall my beloved idiot student number one saying that he needs to know who's the 'bastard' that―"

Tsuna slapped a hand over his boyfriend's mouth, "I think Dino-nii remembers now, Reborn."

"N-No, I don't…!" Dino squeaked out ―an obvious lie.

Reborn pried the hand away and chuckled ominously. "Romario, clear your Boss's schedule tomorrow ―it's not like anyone's going to be sober tomorrow anyway. And you, idiot student number one." The hitman smirked, "Training, tomorrow morning at nine. 2nd Training Room here."

As Dino started completely breaking down, Tsuna, however, had other ideas.

"Hell no!" Tsuna protested. "Nine is way too early. Noon."

Reborn snickered as he tilted his head down to whisper into the brunette's ears, "You and your need to cuddle."

"Hey, I'm giving you more time to have your way with me." Tsuna replied with a wicked grin. "Go easy on Dino-nii, would you?"

"Shall I go harder on you in exchange?" Reborn quipped. He chuckled at the beautiful blush that bloomed on Tsuna's cheeks and he leaned down to kiss his lover once more.

There were a few groans from the crowd with murmurs of, "I so didn't need to know that…", as well as several smirks and grins at the implications. Dino, on the other hand, barely noticed as he had long since turned pale from needing to spar with his former tutor again. He groaned ―there was no way he was getting out of this alive…

"Now then," Reborn addressed the crowd when the two finally broke apart. A shift of his body and a swipe of his arms and Reborn had Tsuna hoisted in his arms, bridal-style ―much to the protest of said 'bride'. "Since the purpose of this ball has been accomplished, we'll be taking our leave now." And with that, Reborn turned and headed out of the ballroom with Tsuna still struggling in his arms.

The crowd watched them walk away in shock, much to Reborn's amusement.


"Stop struggling already." Reborn grumbled as Tsuna continued moving about restlessly in his arms.

"This is so embarrassing…" Tsuna groaned, finally giving up as he slumped in Reborn's embrace.

With a sigh, the brunette reached a hand up to adjust Reborn's fedora before wrapping both of his arms around his lover's neck. Reborn hummed in gratitude at the adjustment and shifted Tsuna a little in his arms. A small part of Reborn noted that Tsuna was a tad too light for his liking, and the hitman made a mental note at the back of his mind to talk to the chefs about the Vongola Decimo's diet.

"You know," Tsuna spoke up, resting his head against Reborn's shoulder blissfully. He shoved that small thought that he really felt like a bride at the moment to the back of his mind and continued, "I'm surprised you didn't shoot Byakuran-san for trying to hug me to death. Or Enma for hugging me."

"Enma didn't need to be shot. Byakuran, however…"

Tsuna chuckled when Reborn's eyes narrowed, the hitman's hands gripping his body just a little bit tighter. "Ah. So you were jealous."

"Yes." Reborn admitted shamelessly. "As for you… You should have kneed that marshmallow-addict where it hurts instead of letting him hug you for so long."

"Oh, come on. That's way too heartless." Tsuna huffed.

"Well, since you're unable to be heartless…" Reborn smirked again. "I'll just have to punish you instead."

Tsuna grinned wickedly, "Punish me all you like. I'm taking my customary post-ball half-day off."

"Don't complain to me when you can't walk tomorrow." Reborn remarked.

Tsuna merely smiled and leaned up to press their lips together for start of the first of the many searing kisses for that night.


A/N: So. I think everyone probably guessed it before you reached the end, given my... history of pairings. Anyways. I couldn't fit in the Guardians (since that would make it too long and too draggy) so the explanation is in the fic itself. If anyone is wondering where Iemitsu is, he was, uhh, thrown out the moment he got in (by Tsuna's orders, of course).

Many thanks to Lightning515 for beta-ing this for me. Spanner-candy? ;)

Thanks to you guys for reading too! Ciao Ciao~