This is the story of Harry Potter, (re)told in the words of The Tombstone Quill. Basically, the Quill is enchanted to read the personality of a person who has died, and write the inscription to be placed upon their tombstone - but of course, it doesn't always write happy, bubbly R.I.P.s...
Let's start with the tombstone inscription of Bellatrix Lestrange.
--
Here lies a woman
Who is no longer here
Though her charm entertain'd
And her brain well-pertain'd
To the issues of the present year
Sadly, she has left us
But wonders will ensue!
For she's sure she's in Hell
Such a grandiose flaming well
Surrounded by demons
Wreathed in great fire
And they're all congratulating
Such a brilliant liar
Schemed the schemes of the age
Drank the ink off the page
She'll naer disparage
All the blood cast in shade
And her life now has ended
Her skin perhaps flayed
Ribs sawed into strips
Or crucified out of rage
But all's well that ends well
Just like good old World War II
Stabbed with blackened shells
Which, like dead fish, smells
And we'll all dance until the end
Flying so high on this cloud of mine
And we'll all party until the smoke rises
From the bombs on the hills
And we're all going to end up like her
Buried in the ground
Left to rot, 'til even maggots we deter
But all's well that ends well
And our hearts will soar sky-high
--
If you've taken the time to read this, please review it. Suggestions for future tombstone inscriptions are welcome!
