Title: Master of games
Rating: G
Pairing / characters: Urahara Ksuke, Yamamoto Genryuusai Shigekuni
Word count: 412 words
Warnings: Generally spoilerish
Summary: Kisuke, the self confessed Master of Games, cannot be trusted
A/N: grimace I was aiming for funny and instead I got… this?
It is a lesson most shinigami have learned.
(some have had to learn it the hard way, but that is more to blame on Kisuke's charm rather than outright stupidity – except in the case of Abarai Renji, who lost a bet he should never have made.)
The problem is that one should never, ever, ever trust Urahara Kisuke.
In his first month at the Academy, Kisuke's conquests outnumbered many of the third years, including a certain very disgruntled Yamamoto Genryuusai Shigekuni – who was reputed to have quite a way with the ladies.
To mention that a little over half of Kisuke's conquests were male only served to make matters worse. (A self confessed Master of Games, Kisuke always said he never took anything too seriously, but no one ever believed him.)
In his first decade as a shinigami, Kisuke's scientific triumphs earned him the respect of many fellow shinigami. Aside from his dubious experiments on 'File X – the result of pheromones and their varied effects on souls both human and shinigami', it was widely accepted that he was well on the way to gaining his captaincy.
(Yamamoto, who had been an unwitting participant in those experiments, was never certain if Kisuke could be trusted with the lives of his subordinates, and by the time the Hougyoku came to light, he knew Kisuke couldn't.)
The only obvious solution was to ban him to Earth, but with so many supporters in both Sereitei and Rukongai, Kisuke really couldn't be trusted to stay where Yamamoto had put him.
Very few people trusted Kisuke with their lives, since he was apt to half kill them in order to make them stronger. Ichigo, who had suffered his tuition more than once, always found himself wondering why Yoruichi chose to stay with him despite their shared history, when it was painfully apparent that Kisuke was liable to kill anyone who looked… out of place. (Clearly, Yoruichi didn't know she was sleeping with a sadistic maniac with a penchant for creating mod souls and shoving them into strange gigais.)
Ironically, it was probably those gigais that had saved Rukia's life but Ichigo preferred to believe otherwise.
Urahara had a reputation for doing things like that, Soul Society's history was littered with the proof.
No one was ever really certain Kisuke could be trusted to keep his nose out of trouble, but when the first of the Arrancar invaded Earth, Yamamoto was among the first to hope that he couldn't.
