Disclaimer: I'm not affiliated with Disney Channel, It's A Laugh Production, or the actors who portrayed the characters. No money was gained on the making and distribution of this fanfiction. Characters, settings, places and events are fictitious. Any resemblance to real life event, place or person is completely coincidental.

Warnings: Sensitive subjects: drugs and alcohol abuse, death, violence, strong language, sensual/sexual situations.

AN: I fought and fought with myself before writing this story, ultimately, decided to go for it. It's not an easy read and deals with very hard situations. Is certainly a story not suited for the faint of heart, but ultimately is about resilience, learning to pick up the pieces after tragedy strikes and family.

Read, Review and Enjoy.


Deal Breaker

Chapter One


Once upon a time our world was on fire and I loved to watch it burn

Wild and reckless, never any limits, guess I had a lot to learn

Cause fire turns to embers, embers to ashes that blow away too soon


She let out a shriek of laughter as Taylor dipped her, then almost drop her. Their impromptu dance was received with cheers and thunderous claps from their fellows cast and crew members. Since Taylor was far from a professional, and they had tripped several times, CeCe was sure half of them were well and truly drunk. She loved them all.

"I'm so going to miss all this." Said Taylor looking down at CeCe with affection. For the last three years they had worked side by side on the medical drama. With a wicked grin, he leaned down and kissed his on screen lover deeply, before setting her upright again. "And that would have to hold me for the next forever." He said laughing.

"So true, pal." Said Cameron, who used to play Taylor's evil step brother, clasping him on the back. "I doubt CeCe's husband will appreciated you having your lips on his wife without a script as an excuse."

CeCe giggled, wrapping an arm around Cameron's waist, bringing the two men, - with whom she had been involve in a romantic triangle to the enjoyment of the million of people who had followed their show fanatically- close to her. She was about to retort, when another voice joined in. "Cameron is right. Lips, and all other body parts, away from the wife, Lautner."

Amid the laughter, CeCe unwrapped herself from the boys, turning in one quick motion towards the sound of the voice. A warm smiled covered her face as her eyes settled on Logan. "Honey, you are here!" Without worrying about who was watching, she threw her arms around her husband, holding tightly onto him as if she would lose him if they let go. A big part of her, one she was trying to ignore at the moment, was scared of just that.

"I wouldn't miss the wrap party." Logan murmured into her ear, his own arms wrapping around CeCe's much smaller body. "I live in fear Mr. Bodybuilding over there will steal you from me." He said more loudly, causing both Taylor and Cameron to break into guffaws. If CeCe had hoped to keep a secret the fact that she used to have a celebrity crush on Taylor when she was younger, Logan had made that impossible. From their first meeting he had been teasing her about getting to be Taylor Lautner's leading lady. The actor had been more than quick to pick up the teasing and through the years working together it had turned into an inside joke between all of them, that he was now with the celebrity crush on her, and was trying to steal CeCe away from Logan.

Despite the fact that Logan often wondered just how real or not Taylor's feeling for CeCe were, he never once really worried that something might have happened between the two of them. Even though their scenes had been more steamy and sensual than he had been comfortable with. Simply fact was, CeCe's biggest trait was her loyalty to those she cared about. She would sooner cut her own arm than cheat. With a mock glare at the guys, he untangled himself from his wife, but he kept an arm wrapped possessively around her waist.

"I can't believe this is the last time we'll be here." Said CeCe, letting some of the sadness she was feeling leaked into her voice. Because she was close to crying, she hid her head on the curve of Logan's neck.

"Hey now, none of that." Logan rubbed her back, "I caught some of the scenes from the last episode. I'm sure all of you will get together again when it's time to celebrate your Emmy."

CeCe smiled brightly at Logan and brushed her lips on the cheek, but she was pulled soon after from him by one of her cast mates, so she left him with Cameron and Taylor and made her way around the set, mingling with people who had become like family during the last three years.

CeCe did her best to keep an eye on Logan during the night. The need to be with him for as long as she could was building inside of her, as did the fear. The knowledge that she would lose him soon enough was threatening to spill over and break her at random moments through the night. Thankfully, whenever she lost momentary control of herself, whoever happened to be near her at the time just chalked it up at the emotional turmoil they were all feeling over the ending of their series.

It was well pass midnight when Logan finally claimed CeCe back again, this time from the arms of the Executive Producer of the show, and proclaimed he was taking the practically sleep walking woman back to their place. Grateful that he had the forethought of calling a limo, Logan slipped into the back of it, CeCe's body curling comfortably around his, even before the driver close the door behind them. "Man, you are really beat." He murmured, pulling her to rest across his lap.

With a sleepy smile, CeCe snuggled close to him, her head coming to rest against his chest. The regular, rhythmical sound of his heart lulling her into a semi coma. "I'm awake." she protested, doing her best to bring herself back to the moment.

"Of course you are." Logan said amused. Unlike his wife, he was far from tired. But then again, CeCe had been running all over the set and dancing with everyone who crossed her way. And the party had come after they finished filming the last scene, so his poor wife had been up since dawn. In fact, now that Logan thought about it, CeCe had been getting up well before him -which was unlike her- for weeks.

"I am." She insisted, then yawned widely.

With a roll of his eyes, Logan decided to humor her. "It's a good thing we are taking a vacation. You really need time off after all this."

"Though you were too busy with work." CeCe said, then repeat herself when she realize that he wouldn't understand what she was saying through her yawning.

"I was. But then I saw how many offers you were getting, so I thought it was better to take the time off now, otherwise you'll start working on a new project and I'm not sure when we'll get another chance." He waited to see if CeCe would reply, then looked down at her when she didn't. He smiled, love plain on the gesture, as he looked as his snoring wife. He supposed it was a good thing she was sleeping once more. If not, she probably would start asking questions about him suddenly agreeing to take time off and knowing how he could never keep a secret from her, he would have spilled about the trip he booked them to Hawaii.

Really, there was no surprising his woman.


She woke up in tears and fright. The nightmare was a recurrent one by that point and she could only be grateful over the fact that she didn't woke up screaming. Sitting up against the headboard of her bed, CeCe took a deep breath and wiped her tears with her hand, then let out a relieved, shuddering breath, when she saw her husband was sleeping peacefully besides her.

Tears continued coming down, and she didn't bother to try to stop them. She wondered, as she observed Logan's face if she was doing the right thing. How could she leave him? How could she go on through life without being with him?

As if sensing that she needed him, he shifted restlessly on the bed, before opening his eyes. "CeCe?" He sat in bed and watched his wife wearily. He could see her clearly through the early morning light slipping through the windows, and what he saw scared him. "What's wrong, baby?" He asked. Logan knew that she had been working through something for the last couple of weeks, but he thought at the time it was the ending of her series. Now though, he was beginning to wonder if something more serious was going on. "Talk to me, CeCe, you are scaring."

CeCe opened her mouth, despair filling her heart. But she couldn't make the words cross her lips. "I'm fine." she finally managed.

"Honey, you can't really said you are fine between sobs and think I'll buy that." He straddled her thighs, one of his hand cupping her chin, making him look at her, while he wiped her tears with the other. "CeCe, please, tell me what's going on." He begged.

But she only shook her head. Maybe she was a coward. But she wasn't ready to lose him just yet. "I love you." she said, looking directly into his brown eyes. "I love you." She repeated, cupping his cheek.

"CeCe."

"Just.. just let me love you." She leaned forward, kissing him softly at first, then applying more pressure. He seem reluctant to kiss her back at first, wanting to know what was going on with her, but after eight years of marriage, CeCe knew exactly what to do to make him lose control. To make him forget everything but her.

Swearing lightly against CeCe's lips, Logan pull her closer to him, kissing her with all the passion and lust he felt for her. "I love you." She said, kissing his cheek, down the column of his throat. His taste was a familiar one now, one she would never get tired of. "Love you." She repeated, desperation clinging to her words, as her hands glided around the naked flesh of Logan's back.

"I love you, too." He said, matching her passion, "CeCe." He pushed her to lie back against the pillows, before settling his body over her smaller frame. Bringing his lips back to CeCe's he kissed her deeply, his tongue invading her mouth, running against hers. "Mine. You are mine." He said, biting into her lower lip gently.

On a choked sob, she brought his mouth back to her.


It was Hawaii that broke her.

After their passionate encounter early in the morning, Logan had tried to get CeCe to talk to him again. To explain what was wrong with her. But CeCe had been close mouthed about it, and after a short fight he had left her on their bedroom, slamming the door behind him. He came back later in the afternoon with the tickets. He had hope that the trip would cheer her up, even if she didn't share with him the reason of her angst. Yet.

But CeCe hadn't been happy about their vacation. One looked at the tickets and she had turned a devastated gaze on her husband like he had ripped her heart out.

"That's it. CeCe, tell me what the hell is going on." Logan demanded, hurt and confused at her reaction. "Just tell me."

"I'm pregnant." The words almost burnt her tongue. But once she said them, it was like a weight was lifted from her shoulders. She could, for the first time in weeks, breath again.

"You are what, now?" As he waited for CeCe to confirmed what she just said, he made sure to keep his face from showing any of his feelings.

"I'm pregnant." She repeated more forceful this time. Her brown eyes were fixed on Logan's. Her heart was beating a million beats a second, her stomach was threatening to revolt and make her throw up what little she had managed to eat. But CeCe didn't allowed any of that show on her face. Right that moment, she wasn't speaking for herself. She wasn't fighting for her.

Logan seemed to withdraw into himself, his eyes, usually warm and filled with affection when he looked at CeCe were now ice cold. Taking a deep breath, he stood from the kitchen stool where he had been sitting besides CeCe, and walked around the counter, as if the small marble island would put distance between them.

Feeling as she had been slapped in the face, CeCe flinched slightly as he walked away from her. Her heart broke, as her deepest fears were confirmed. She refused, however, to accept defeat that easy. "Say something." she practically demanded. Though she wasn't sure just what she wanted Logan to tell her.

For several seconds he just stared at her, betrayal shinning on his eyes for a brief instance before indifference replace it. But it had been there long enough for CeCe to see it. "You know what I'm going to say. You know how I feel about this." His gaze flickered for a moment between CeCe's face to her still flat belly, before coming back to her eyes.

"Logan I did not seek this. I did not got pregnant by myself." She snapped at him, fury coming suddenly and replacing everything else.

"Look, mistakes happen all the time." Logan snapped back, anger quickly coming to the surface on him as well. But he had to believe her. Had to believe it had been an accident rather than a trick on her part. "There is a simple way to fix this." He said without thinking.

The slap came quickly and before he could avoid it. Brown eyes that he loved so much were looking at him with disgust and so much anger, that Logan was surprise he hadn't burst into flames. "Don't," she said in a cloak of ice calm that was frightening. "If you ever loved me, don't you ever said that to me." Holding her hands protectively over her belly, CeCe shot one last disdainful look at Logan and walked away from the kitchen.


He sword loudly and profoundly, his hand gripping the glass of whiskey tightly, as the voice of his wife came from the radio on the bar, echoing against the walls. Her dark, seductive voice, that so often would turned him into a mass of lust and faulty self control, teased him now. Reminding him of what had happened between them not three hours ago.

After she stalked out of the kitchen, Logan had gone out too. Leaving the house and his -he gulped as he thought it- pregnant wife, probably hating his guts in there. He took a long walk, and when that has done nothing to calm down his rising panic and ire, he sneaked into a bar.

He hadn't gotten drunk, though he had wanted to. Logan knew he would have to returned home at some point and the last thing he needed was to face CeCe while drunk. So he nursed his second glass of whiskey and tried to figure out what to do.

Truth was, Logan didn't want to think about what was happening. He wished he hadn't pushed CeCe into confessing what was happening with her. Ignorance, he thought nastily, was bliss.

He didn't want a baby. To have a child had never been on his plans. CeCe had know that. He supposed that's why she had been suffering so much since she found out. Why she had been so reluctant to speak with him. As he thought of how upset CeCe had been when he woke up that morning. How much she had been through, he cursed again.

"And that was CeCe Jones's latest hit." said the radio's DJ. "Already top of the charts!"

Logan sighed and tried his best to ignore even that. But the mention of his wife's name just caused his heart to ache. Closing his eyes for a second, he brought back that last moment with her on the kitchen, before his eyes snapped open. "Scooter, you thoughtless dick." shamed filled him, as his last words to her finally caught up to him. With a shake of his head, he paid for his drink and jumped from the bar-stool. He needed to get home to CeCe, to asked her to forgive him for his thoughtless words. "Dammit." He murmured, trying to hold back the urge to break out in a run.

He still didn't want to have a baby, and he wasn't sure just what he would say to her when he arrive home, but he knew he had to fix the hurt he caused, because he crossed a line he shouldn't have.

But by the time he arrived, CeCe was already gone.


AN(2): If you made it this far, thank you. I hope you enjoy this and stay around for the next chapter. Good news is, that this story is actually complete. Next chapter will be published next week.

As always, questions, suggestions, opinions are more than welcome. Let me know what you thought of it! Thanks again for the support.

LadyGuilt