Thanksgiving Madness

I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, or any other show, brand name, song, or anything else in that nature (if used). I do, however, own all OCs and the Millennium Medallion. This is just a one-shot holiday special. It's not recommended for children under the age of 13. People of the internet, you have been warned. Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Enjoy!

"Huh," Ryo asked, "us?" Each year for Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years, Yugi and his gang would select a hikari and their yami to host a party for one of the holidays. This year, Ryo and Bakura were hosting the Thanksgiving party.

"Don't worry, Ryo," Bakura assured, "we can do it, and it'll be a lot better then Yami and Yugi's Halloween party."

"I heard that," Yami growled, "and look, I'm sorry. Yugi told me to get soda and he didn't tell me that there are other drinks in bottles, too!"

"Right," Bakura retorted, "and I my hair is the color blue." Chihiro scratched her head.

"Um," she mumbled, "Bakura…" The female hikari was cut off when her yami, Fukayna, smacked her lightly on the back of the head.

"Shush," she whispered, "with great power, comes great responsibility." Chihiro nodded, rubbing the back of her head.

"But there's another problem," Ryo announced, "neither Bakura or I can cook."

"How do you feed the poor child?" Fukayna asked Bakura with slanted eyes.

"Frozen meals," Bakura announced, "particularly Hot Pockets." Fukayna raised an eyebrow, and shook her head.

"Men," she growled to herself.

"Keep this in mind, Chihiro," the female yami advised, "men have always been stupid and clueless… even in ancient Egypt three thousand years ago."

"Oh yeah," Yami challenged, "prove it." Fukayna grinned.

"Gladly," she retorted, "the Millennium Items. Most of them are worn around the neck… like jewelry. You and Bakura have been fighting over them for countless centuries. In other words, two grown men have risked life and limb fighting over a few pieces of jewelry and accessories! And a man decided that it'd be best to slaughter an entire village to make them, and don't even get me started on Lord of the Rings!" Now everyone was looking at her like deer to headlights. She looked at each of them, still wearing a grin.

"Pretty impressive, huh?" she chuckled.

"Let's get back on subject," Anzu announced, "we still need to figure out who's going to help out Ryo and Bakura with the food. And I think I know the right person to do it." She smiled and kept pointing at herself.

"Yeah," Ryo agreed, "Chihiro and Fukayna should help." Anzu's mouth dropped open.

"No," she growled, "Me! Neither one of them is even from this country!"

"But Chihiro's really nice," Ryo said.

"And I need a better excuse to get away from the kitchen," Bakura mumbled. Everyone stared at the white-haired yami, even Ryo and Fukayna.

"I didn't mean that," he yowled in his own defense, "you all just have sick minds… well, everyone but Ryo."

"I don't get it," Ryo mumbled to Chihiro, "what was he talking about?"

"Uh," Chihiro replied with her face twitching, "I'll explain it later."

"Alright," Fukayna announced, "we'll go over and help Ryo and Bakura with the food… and we are ALL staying in the kitchen until the party begins."

Chihiro knocked on Ryo's apartment door. Yesterday, they had all decided that he and Bakura were going to be hosting the Thanksgiving party, and since their cooking is lower then Marie Calendar's warm-up meals, Chihiro and Fukayna were going over to help them out. Ryo opened the door and let them in.

"Hey guys," he welcomed, "Bakura's in the kitchen with the turkey, and…" He was cut off when Fukayna pushed him out of her way and ran to the kitchen.

"Fukayna," Chihiro yelled after her, "can't you control your hormones for a few seconds?!" The pale hikari sighed.

"You might not want to go in there for a few minutes," she advised. Chihiro peeked into the kitchen, and said it was safe. Their yamis were just staring at the turkey.

"Bakura," Fukayna finally said, "staring at the turkey isn't going to cook it."

"Fine," he yelled, "do you have any other ideas, Ms. I-apparently-know-eveything-about-cooking-a-21st-century-meal?"

"Why don't you put it in the oven?" the female yami smirked.

"You know what," Ryo said, "Chihiro and I will take care of the turkey. Why don't you guys do something similar, like making the cranberry sauce?"

"How do you do that?" Fukayna asked.

"It's easy," Chihiro instructed, "just open the can, slip out the cranberries, use a fork to smash it up, and then warm it up in the microwave."

"Alright." As the yamis got the can of cranberries, the hikaris picked up the turkey and placed in the oven. Ryo set it to the time and temperature that Chihiro told him.

"Sorry," Ryo apologized.

"For what?" Chihiro asked with a confused look on her face.

"For making you guys come over like this," the white-haired hikari explained, "I feel bad. We should be able to handle this fine."

"Dude," Chihiro replied, "we live a whole four doors down the hall. And besides, it's fun to hang out with your friends, no matter what you're doing." She smiled, and Ryo copied her. Soon, they heard a chainsaw being turned on behind them.

When they turned around, Bakura and Fukayna were wearing goggles, and the female yami was lowering her chainsaw on a single can of cranberry sauce.

"Fukayna," Chihiro yelled, "You seriously brought that?! Turn it off!" Fukayna stopped, and she and Bakura removed their goggles.

"This thing is impossible to open," the female yami complained.

"Yeah," Bakura agreed, "We need a jackhammer or something."

"Oh," Ryo said, "I'll be right back!" He ran out of the kitchen and out the apartment.

"Where is he going?" Fukayna asked. Bakura shrugged.

"Probably to go get a Hot Pocket," he replied. At that moment, the doorbell rang. Bakura answered it and let Marik, Malik, Ishizu, and Odion in.

"Where's Ryo?" Malik asked. Bakura just shrugged and shook his head.

"What's wrong, Bakura," Marik smirked, "can't take care of your hikari?" Bakura growled. When he was walking back to the kitchen, the doorbell rang again. This time, it was Jonouchi, Anzu, and Honda. They just ran inside and raced over to the television.

"Bakura," Fukayna cooed, "why don't you stay out here and take care of your guests? Chihiro and I have got it covered in the kitchen." Bakura looked at her with suspicion, but nodded.

"Alright," he agreed. As he leaned over to kiss her, they heard screaming from the living room.

They ran over to the television, where everyone was at.

"What's football doing on my 52 inch?!" Bakura roared. Fukayna had walked over Ishizu and whispered in her ear. Soon the two women were gone, probably back into the kitchen.

"Wait," Odion asked next to the pale yami, "we're in America? I thought we were in Japan."

"Well I thought we were in Berlin," Malik stated.

"Do you even know where Berlin is?" Marik asked.

"I-it's a country in Antarctica, right?" the tan hikari answered. Bakura just rolled his eyes and walked over to the kitchen. To his surprise, Chihiro was standing in the doorway.

"Let me pass," Bakura growled. Chihiro shook her head.

"Sorry, Bakura," the female hikari answered, "but Fukayna told me not to let you or Ryo in the kitchen, or else."

"Or else what?" the yami challenged.

"She still has the chainsaw," she replied.

"Hey," Ryo yelled, "I'm back!" Ryo had come back, and Duke and Serenity were behind him.

"Oh, Serenity," Chihiro announced, "You're needed in the kitchen." Serenity nodded and ran passed the black-haired hikari. What are you up to, Fukayna?

"Hey Ryo," Bakura asked, "Why did you bring him?"

"You said that you needed a jackhammer," the innocent hikari said, "and Duke here said that he's got a great one that Fukayna can use!" Chihiro and Bakura's jaws dropped. Bakura's eyes turned red from fury, and then tackled Duke onto the floor.

"Why you," the yami yowled, "when I get through with you, you'll with you were never even born, you damn mortal!" As they wrestled, Duke and Bakura began cussing at each other, and Ryo just cocked his head.

"Did I mess up?" he asked Chihiro.

"Ryo," she replied, "it's time you knew the truth." She began whispering things in his ear, and the innocent hikari's eyes widened in horror. Ryo dropped onto the floor, rubbing his arms and rocking back and forth.

"Unclean," he mumbled, "so, very… un…clean… I'm unclean…"

"I hope I didn't scar him too bad," Chihiro whispered to herself.

Bakura was pinning Duke down with his foot and held a knife above his head.

"Suck on this, pretty boy," Bakura laughed. Fukayna was now standing behind her hikari wearing a smile.

"Hey, Bakura," Yami announced, "your front door was opened to Yugi and I just walked in. I hope you don't mind."

"Sorry Pharaoh," Bakura growled, "but there's a line for my torture service at the moment."

"Why is Ryo shivering in the corner?" Yugi asked Chihiro.

"He's going a very important phase right now," she replied.

"No way," Yami yowled, "Bakura, you get the football game? Wow!" He ran over and sat down on the couch with everyone else. Bakura raised an eyebrow and let Duke go, who ran over to the television as well.

"Chihiro," Fukayna instructed, "you back in the kitchen. I need to talk to Bakura, and he'll only be honest if we're alone." Chihiro nodded, and then left her post.

"Fukayna," Bakura mumbled, "this is a disaster. My apartment looks as if a twister had passed through, there's some sport that I have absolutely no idea about on my 52 inch, my hikari is scared, and I don't even know what the hell you've been doing in the kitchen."

"Know that doesn't sound like the great thief of Egypt I knew," Fukayna responded while putting her arms around his torso, "come on, Chihiro is getting everyone for the meal." The female yami lead him into the dining room, and when they got there Bakura stared in amazement. Everything was on the table: the turkey, the cranberry sauce, the pies, and other Thanksgiving necessities. Even the basket that looks like a hat with the autumn leaves and fall fruits was in the center of the table.

"This is perfect," he mumbled, "everything's just… Fukayna, how?"

"It's a girl thing," she replied with a wink, "that's why I asked for Ishizu and Serenity."

"Hey, what about me," Anzu cried, "I'm a woman, too!"

"Yeah," Fukayna said, "but I don't like you."

As the meal progressed, Bakura found it very difficult to see straight. As he tried to look around, Fukayna was swaying from side to side, Marik was gibbering and laughing, and Yami had fallen completely out of his seat. Bakura picked up his glass and looked into it, and he looked at his hikari, Ryo, who was staring at him with and evil grin on his face. When he saw the other three hikaris, they were all doing the same thing.

"W-what kind of," Bakura mumbled, "k-kind of damn cranberry juice is this?!"

"Woops," Chihiro giggled, "it looks like I picked up the wrong jug!"

"Why," Fukayna tried to growl, "why did you four do it?"

"Revenge," Ryo replied, "you guys have been stealing all of our time in Foreign! All the readers think that we're weak and unimportant, so we're fighting back!"

"B-but," Marik stumbled, "w-we haven't even a-appeared in Foreign!"

"Yeah," Yugi explained, "but we didn't want Malik feel left out."

"Then," Yami asked has he tried to stand up, "why did you get Anzu drunk as well?" Everyone looked at the girl, who apparently thought she was Dorthy from Wizard of Oz, and that Odion was Toto.

"Come on Toto," she laughed, "Remember, there's no place like home, there's no… no… pet like gnome!"

"We just don't like her," Malik answered. Everyone nodded, and just continued with there food, except for Marik and Anzu, who skipped out of the door singing something about a yellow brick road, a witch… and Hot Pockets.

"Aren't you going to go after him?" Ryo asked Malik. The tan hikari shook his head.

"No," he replied, "I've got a chip on him."

A/N: *SMILES* my first holiday special! I loved typing about the football game, and when all the yamis and Anzu got drunk. And for all of you who are wondering what I was talking about, yes, it's the American football, the one that doesn't make any sense and is apparently more important then eating. *EYES ROLL* and I couldn't remember what Duke and Serenity's Japanese names were, so if I could get that information for further writing, it would make me very happy! Happy Thanksgiving!