Author's Note : This story isn't really a story, this is a group of chapters with 3 or 4 tales each some of them are comedy others are tragedy others are just ridiculous as you will see, that is if you got enough nerve to do it (just kidding), each of this tales is not related to each other. Ps: in the 2nd tale I was inspired by a video of youtube :P. Enjoy and review, please pretty please with cherries on top! Lol
Disclaimer: I don't own harry potter or any of these characters or the songs, or the restaurants or the whatever comes up here.
Tale 1: Harry's first love
Harry was 7 years old and he was walking down the Constitution Hill Street in London next to the Buckingham palace with his dad. He was on vacations.
It was a rainy day, as usual in London, but the street's still had the same charm of England. There were lots of tourists around the palace taking photos and, has James noticed, stealing wallets, he always had good eyes, that contributed to the fact that he was a great seeker.
"Dad can I have some candy?" Harry said pointing with his finger towards a candy kiosk.
"Your mother doesn't like you eating candies before lunch..."
" Ohhh come on... just one!"
"I don't know... promise not to tell your mother?"
"Yep..." he crossed his heart.
"Ok let's go."
When they got to the kiosk the candy man said:
"Hello little fellow, what can I do you for?"
And then it happened, if this was a movie you'd be watching one of those scenes where everything turns into slow motion, "At Last" by Beyoncé Knowles is playing in the background, the wind blows lightly and the frame of the picture turns either blue or pink. Harry saw a GIANT lollipop with every color of the rainbow, and he knew he had just fell in love.
The End
Tale 2: Hermione removes her wisdom tooth
Hermione had just turned fourteen, she lived with her parents in Richmond, near London. Hermione's parents were dentists; they worked in an office called The Smile Studio in the Hill street, Richmond. That day Hermione had an appointment with her own father in order to remove her wisdom tooth. While Hermione's father was working with other patients her and her mother went to a restaurant next to the office, called Giraffe.
"Can I take your order?" the waiter got to their table.
" I'd like a…" Hermione's mother grabbed the menu "I'd like a "Bang Bang Chicken Salad" please"
"I want something fat! Hmm… How many calories is there in the "Mexican Grilled Chicken & Chorizo Burger"? "
"Hermione!" her mother pinched her under the table.
"What! I'm nervous…"
"Miss, I don't know but I can ask."
"It's ok. I'll have the Mexican Chorizo burger thing, double sized."
"Ok… To drink?"
"Water thank you." the waiter walked away "Hermione! What's there to be so nervous about? It's just a tooth."
"I'm just nervous ok? Let me be… And I wanted a triple size soda!"
After lunch they asked for another salad to take for her father and went to the office.
"Hmmm, delicious! I just love this salad. Thank you honey. So where is she?"
"In the bathroom, she's really anxious you know?"
"It's going to be ok, the only thing she has to worry about is the anesthetics, sometimes people have weird reactions to them."
30 min. later Hermione was already under operation and her mother was in the waiting room reading a magazine. About an hour later the operation had ended and her husband came out of the room to call her.
"She's waking up, talk slowly she might be a little sleepy."
"I know honey, I'm also a dentist."
Hermione was laying on the bed. Her mother walked into the room, her father stayed outside, she sat in the chair next to the bed.
"Oh. Hello sweetie, are you ok?" she leaned towards her daughter.
"Are YOU ok?" she uncomfortably opened her eyes and pointed to her mother granting her the weirdest look, also because she was white as flour and her mouth was full of cotton making her sound funny.
"I'm fine, I guess… But, do you feel any pain?" she pulled her chair a bit further away from the bed.
"I … am… good." Hermione answered slowly. "I feel like… if a Hippogriff just took me for a ride through a field of pixies dancing with elves."
"Yes sweetie, I think I'm going to get you something to eat…"
"What for? Join me in this ride through wonderland! And there will certainly be enough food for everyone!" She smiled wildly.
"Ok… You are really freaking me out! I think it's the drugs, If you eat something it will pass faster."
"They tried to make go rehab, I said no, no, no;
Yes I've been black, but when I come back you'll know know know
I ain't got the time but if my daddy thinks I'm fine
He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go!" (Rehab, Amy winehouse) out of nothing Hermione started singing really loud making her mother fall from the chair " Are you ok mother?"
Hermione's father walked into the room " Is every… Omg are you ok? What happened?" he helped his wife getting up.
"She's having a reaction to the drugs.
"I'm so thirsty! Gimmie Gimmie Gimmie a bottle of water
before I disintegrate to the floor" (Gimmie gimmie gimmie, Abba) she sang.
The End
Tale 3: The ridiculous interview with Ronald Weasley
Ronald Weasley has agreed to participate in this interview and tell us a little bit about his life, He is a young star who triumphed by the side of the MAJOR STAR HARRY POTTER one of the most famous wizards of all times who defeated He-who-must-not-be-named, and has accomplished many achievements from saving Hogwarts several times to saving the world itself.
Q: So, Ronald Weasley, when did you meet the amazing Harry Potter?
A: I've met Harry for the first time on Kings Cross Station in our first year at Hogwarts.
Q: And did you know you had just met the, yet to be, killer of Lord Voldemort, Harry Potter?
A: No, I only realized who he was when I saw his scar on the way to Hogwarts, in the train I mean.
Q: Where you excited when you met him?
A: Of course! Who wouldn't be excited to meet Harry Potter?
Q: Right… I know that Hogwarts team Gryffindor won the first game of quidditch that Harry Potter had ever played because of him, were you there to see his amazing performance under the attacks of black magic?
A: Yes, yes I was…
Q: At Harry's second year he fought against the frightening Basilisk, where you there to witness that as well?
A: No… I got stuck in the middle of rocks!
Q: Ok… At Harry's third grade he fought 100 Dementors! Did you observe that too?
A: *sigh* No I was in the ward…
Q: Hmm, ok. Harry was a champion of Hogwarts School on his fourth grade and he fought against a Dragon, water creatures and a damn scary maze, did you see it all.
A: Yes! Of course I did, every single student at that school did!
Q: You don't need to be so frustrated, we know you probably don't like us invading your privacy like this.
A: My privacy? Haha! You mean Harry's privacy…
Q: Any who, when Harry reached 15 he proved the world wrong and showed us, with an incredible battle, that Voldemort was really still alive. Do you keep that battle in your memories?
A: I was kind of unconscious because of an octopus brain thing.
Q: Really? Did Harry fight against that?
A: As I said I can't remember I was UNCOSCIOUS!
Q: Right right… The next year Harry witnessed the death of Albus Dumbledore. Did he cry?
A: WHAT THE HELL! It's none of your business!
Q: Finally, the next year, the war collapsed upon us and Harry went by himself to fight against evil in long journey that ended with the war of Hogwarts and the death of Voldemort. And…
A: WHAT? He wasn't alone! Hermione Granger and myself were a part of that journey TOO!
Q: Ok but, it seems to me that you, after all, aren't that much of side-kick…
A: WTF! I'm not a side-kick! I'm Harry's friend! And is this interview about Harry or about me?
Q: Well… Harry wasn't available so...
The end
