Me *happily spreading my arms*: Welcome back everybody to another cartoon one-shot!
Voice: Eh. What's up doc?
*I turned around and saw Bugs Bunny munching his carrot. I smiled as he approached.*
Me: Boy am I so excited cause it's my first Looney Tunes fanfic.
Bugs *smiling*: It sure is. Welcome to the Looney Tunes fanfic kiddo.
Me: Thanks.
Bugs: And now since it's your first Looney Tunes fanfic, let us play some music.
*Bugs left and came back with a few musical instruments.*
Me: A bit later if you don't mind.
Bugs: If you say so.
Me: Well then, thank you all so much for supporting me by reviewing and liking my others stories. It's been a great pleasure.
Now Bugs. Since you are the main star, you have the honor to say the disclaimer.
Bugs: No problem. *Munches his carrot before saying* And Zahir890 doesn't own The Looney Tunes. It belongs to its respective owners.
Me: And now without any further delay, let's get to my first Looney Tunes fanfic which is a one-shot. Enjoy reading :).
Now then Bugs, you can play the music. What's the music you want to play?
*Bugs then began to play the Looney Tunes opening theme in which I enjoyed it.*
Food Fight Massacre!
It is a sad day today in the Warner Brothers Studio and a very sad day for all the Looney Tunes. Usually the Looney Tunes would laugh, chat and do funny stuffs happily but today isn't that day.
Why are they sad? It's because their latest movie, Looney Tunes: Back in Action didn't do so well. Although it received mixed to positive reviews, it was a box office flop, falling way short of its budget.
When the Looney Tunes gang received that news, they couldn't believe their eyes and ears! They are utterly devastated. All their hard work they did was wasted.
And now here there are. It is lunch time but the Looney Tunes gang didn't feel like eating. Perhaps feeling even more gloomier is an anthropomorphic gray hare or rabbit name Bugs Bunny, the star of the gang. Normally, you would see him munching carrots but today he doesn't feel like doing so. Sitting beside him on the left side is an anthropomorphic Tuxedo cat with a big red nose and he comes by the name Sylvester. He is having his fish meal. Bugs looked at him and said:
"Well doc. After hearing that damning news, it looks like our future are at stake and my head is just jumbling up."
"Well you are not the only one Bugs." Sylvester said while he is eating his fish, "All of us are very worried. Besides, I only appeared twice so what's the use?"
"That's true but what will happen to us now? How are we gonna live? How are we gonna eat? We will starve and we might end up having to eat some trash."
"I remember you saying in the year 2000, which I think is the millennium year, that the gang will always be together no matter what happens."
"Thanks doc but what if we are forced by circumstance to go in our separate ways?"
"I have no idea."
"That's my another fear as well."
Bugs and Sylvester then sighed for a moment. Suddenly they could hear the swearing words of an anthropomorphic black duck with an orange beak whose name is Daffy Duck. Steam is coming up from his head and he is definitely not too pleased. He sat beside Bugs, slammed his lunch on the table and growled angrily:
"The movie was a bomb blast! What a waste!"
Upon hearing that, everyone is even more depressed. Not happy about it, Bugs said sternly to Daffy:
"Daffy. Cut it out! You're depressing everyone!"
"Am I?! It's your fault buster!" Daffy said angrily.
Everyone now is starting to look at Bugs and Daffy. Bugs is totally shocked at Daffy just said.
"What do yer mean it's my fault?!" Bugs asked in shock.
"It's your fault because I literally had to team up with you!" Daffy said.
"That's totally nonsense! Hey mister, it's actually your fault! And I have a clear reason to it! We gave you the chance and you took the chance. They wanted to see if both of us teaming can work and I was even excited that you could share the spotlight with me but look what happened as a result! The movie failed financially! So it's your fault technically."
"I guess the wabbit is wight (right)." A bald headed hunter name Elmer Fudd said.
Many Toons are whispering and small talks about it. Daffy slammed his fist on the table and shouted:
"Well that's because I always had to play second-fiddle to you Bugs! You always beat me and took the spotlight away from me! Chuck Jones and others had neglected me! Had I bested you in one of those hunting seasons, I would had become the star and people would love me! But no! You were the star and I'm sure people were disgusted when they had seen me teaming up with you!"
"You are shouting as if you have no fans!" Bugs shouted back, "You won't had even exist if you had zero fan base!"
And so Bugs and Daffy continued to argue here and there. Many toons are getting extremely worried as they are thinking that Bugs and Daffy are making this personal. A large, white adult Leghorn rooster name Foghorn Leghorn approached them and tried to separate them.
"Cut it, I say, Cut it out! This argument won't do any good for you boys." Foghorn said.
But Bugs and Daffy ignored him and continued to argue back and forth. Daffy then suddenly grabbed his lunch and slammed it into Bugs! Everyone is shocked at what Daffy just did. Bugs looked at himself in shock.
"That will teach yer to keep your big mouth shut!" Daffy exclaimed.
"Well of course you don't realize that this means war!" Bugs proclaimed sternly.
Bugs then is about to spill some carrot juice on Daffy but Daffy ducked and it went to a Martian name Marvin the Martian. Everybody gasped.
"Oh! You make me so angry." Marvin said in a bit of anger.
Marvin then threw a tomato but both Bugs and Daffy dodged and it went straight to coyote, name Wile E. Coyote, instead. Soon, out of nowhere, other toons started to throw food randomly at each other and within a few minutes, ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE! Soon the walls, tables and floors are in a mess! Everyone is going crazy!
"Take that you wabbit!" Daffy exclaimed as he threw a pie on Bugs, who dodged it.
"Have some carrots!" Bugs exclaimed as he charged, caught Daffy and put two carrots on his mouth.
Daffy immediately spat.
"Yuck! Your carrots taste like garbage bins!" Daffy spat.
"How about some carrot juice?" Bugs asked sarcastically.
Bugs then grabbed a carrot juice and immediately poured it on Daffy's mouth. Daffy immediately spilled it and it surprisingly went straight to Speedy Gonzales, an anthropomorphic Mexican Mouse who can run very fast and wears a yellow sombrero, white shirt and trousers and a red kerchief.
A whole lot of food throwing and food bashing is going on and around crazily. A fiery red-haired cowboy name Yosemite Sam and Elmer Fudd spilled at each other with tomato and chill sauce bottles. Sylvester threw a pie at Foghorn Leghorn's face. Poor Porky Pig is being hit all over without him throwing food at anybody. Wile E. Coyote is searching for Road Runner, a fast-running ground bird, with few tomatoes in his hand. All off a sudden, out of nowhere, the Road Runner is behind the coyote and gave the 'Beep Beep!' sound in which the coyote jumped in fright and all the tomatoes he carried flew and went straight at him.
Meanwhile a anthropomorphic French striped skunk whose name is Pepé Le Pew is hugging a black cat, whose name is Penelope Pussycat and whom Pepé mistaken her as a skunk. Pepé seems like he is in love and doesn't care about foods being thrown at him.
"Come my little darling. Let's make some love." Pepé said sweetly as he repeatedly kissed her, "We will always be together."
Penelope, of course, would have none of it and tried to get away but she couldn't. She then saw a fried chicken on the table. Likely, they are near the table so Penelope grabbed the chicken and stuffed it on Pepé's mouth. She then made her escape. Pepé chewed it before saying it in awe:
"Would you believe it? My darling gave me this. This is ze true love!"
And so Pepé started strolling happily to reach Penelope.
The carnage is going on and on. Marvin and his alien dog, K-9, are being hit by chocolate cakes. A small, brown chickenhawk with a forelock of feathers name Henery Hawk, Speedy Gonzales and Sylvester Junior, who is Sylvester's son and is miniature version of his father, having a large head in proportion to a small body, are having a bit of a wrestling Food Fight match. Taz, the anthropomorphic ferocious Tasmanian Devil, is spinning around and throwing tomatoes everywhere. Soon, the other toons started throwing at him. Granny is hiding under the table and is using her umbrella to protect herself from the flying food. The bulldog name Hector the Bulldog and Barnyard Dawg, an adult anthropomorphic basset hound, are having a food brawl.
An anthropomorphic Yellow canary bird name Tweety Bird noticed that Sylvester is talking to someone on the phone. Tweety then picked up a pie, flew up a bit high and dropped it right straight to Sylvester's head. Tweety then flew towards him.
"Whom are you talking to, putty tat?" Tweety asked curiously.
"Why you!" Sylvester growled a bit before saying on the phone, "I'll talk to ya later."
And within 5 seconds, Sylvester cut the call and jumped on Tweety. Tweety just flew away and Sylvester landed flat on his face.
"Ohhh. I never thought the putty tat has a phone." Tweety said to himself in awe, "He must be talking to someone special."
But then, all off a sudden, Tweety got hit by a tomato in which he didn't see that coming. He looked and saw that it is none other than Sylvester who threw it. Sylvester jumped in joy.
"Yeah! Take that bird!" Sylvester said happily, "Strike."
"Bad putty tat." Tweety murmured.
The food is still flying everywhere when all off a sudden, there is a flash. The toons stopped and turned around to the direction of the flash and they saw an anthropomorphic female rabbit who has tan fur, blonde bangs, and wears a purple rubber band on both ears like a ponytail and has aqua colored eyes. She is smiling and holding a camera.
"Lola!" Bugs gasped.
"Whoops. I have put the flash by accident." Lola said.
Everybody gasped.
"Then wait a darn sec. You have been taking pictures all this time?" Bugs gasped in a bit of shock.
"But it's really fun to take pictures at you guys throwing food at each other." Lola smiled, "Even though I wasn't there on that Back in Action Movie, it's still fun to witness this food fighting craziness."
Suddenly, someone threw milk at Lola. Lola stared at herself in horror. Everybody looked to see it is Daffy Duck who threw the milk.
"Then have this, yer doll!" Daffy said.
Everyone then again looked at Daffy and he realized that he has made a big mistake.
"Oh Daffy. You have just dug your own grave." Bugs said.
"Me and my big mouth." Daffy muttered.
Lola, after hearing that word 'doll', is fuming. She grabbed two chocolate cakes and looked at Daffy.
"Did you just call me doll?" Lola asked.
"Mother." Daffy whimpered.
"Thanks for that, I'm all fired up! Prepare to face my wrath."
And so Lola started to throw the chocolate cakes at Daffy, who got hit by one and dodged the another. Soon, out of nowhere, everyone started to throw food again.
Many Minutes Later:
Everyone is so tired after so many minutes. They have no idea what to say after what they just did. Everything is a mess! Walls, floors, tables, chairs, etc. Everything!
After a minute silence, Sylvester chuckled a bit before starting to laugh. Everybody looked at him in surprise. Soon Bugs also laughed as well. Then Lola, Sam and others. Soon everyone started to laugh as well. Daffy, Bugs and Lola laid on the floor for a while with Bugs and Lola holding each other's hands.
"Whoo-Hoo! That was awesome!" Daffy said before looking at Bugs, "Right Wabbit?"
"Yeah doc. You can say that again." Bugs said before looking at Lola, "You alright?"
"Yeah. I'm okay." Lola smiled, "At least, my camera isn't broken and I was able to take photos of it."
"That's great! I think I have something to say."
"Eh?"
Bugs then got up and stood on the table. He clapped to get the other toons' attention. He then said:
"Attention toons! This is very important. Now all of us have no idea of what's gonna happen to us in the future given the financial flop of the latest movie but should things go badly for in the coming days or we are forced to go in our separate ways, then I want to say this. That what we did just now was really awesome and messy and it would forever be in our heads. And since Lola has taken photos of it, the photos would all be delivered to you so that you will never forget about us and this moment."
The toons cheered loudly. They have finally something to cheer for after the bad news they received.
"It would have been awesome if Chuck Jones and others could had made an episode of us doing the Food Fight Massacre." Sylvester said in which everybody nodded.
"My thoughts exactly son." Foghorn Leghorn said.
"Okay. So now what?" Granny asked.
"How about we take one photo of all of us?" Daffy asked.
Everybody seems to like that idea.
"Well okay then. Gather everybody cause we are about to take one last gang photo in case we have to go in our own ways." Bugs said.
"I'll set the camera." Lola said.
And so while Lola is setting up the camera, the other toons have gathered in a group. They are all messy but they are really happy.
"Am I in the photo?" Daffy called.
"In a few seconds." Lola said.
After a few seconds, Lola then said:
"The camera will shoot in 10 seconds."
"Alright then gang. Say FOOD FIGHT MASSACRE!" Bugs called cheerfully.
"FOOD FIGHT MASSACRE!" The other toons called cheerfully.
Lola then joined them and said "FOOD FIGHT MASSACRE!" as well. After 4 more seconds, the camera finally CLICKS.
Me: And that's the end of my first Looney Tunes fanfic.
Bugs *excitingly*: And you started with a Food Fight Massacre bang! Awesome! Hopefully we can get to see more...
*Out of nowhere, a pie came and hit Bugs Bunny on the face. Then we saw Sylvester appearing and giggling a bit.*
Sylvester *giggling*: He He. Hey guys! That was fun. Perfect sneak attack.
Bugs *snickering*: Sneak attack eh? Well we will see about that when I give you this!
*Bugs then threw a tomato at Sylvester, who ducked. Bugs then chased Sylvester, throwing as many different food as he can with Sylvester doing the same thing. I watched the chase.*
Me: While they are chasing and throwing food at each other, I just want to say that next week, another one-shot will be coming. So stay in your gears.
And until then, don't forget to review and like this and my other stories. So until then...
*Bugs and Sylvester stopped midway.*
Me, Bugs and Sylvester *exclaiming happily*: That's All Folks!
*Bugs and Sylvester then resumed the chase while I played the ending theme of the Looney Tunes.*
