„The fire, someone stop the fire!" I screamed as it burned me.
„Carlisle! Her hand!"
„He bit her." Carlisle's voice was no longer calm, it was appalled.
I heard Edward catch his breath in horror.
„Edward, you have to do it." It was Alice's voice, close by my head. Cool fingers brushed at the wetness in my eyes.
„No!" he bellowed.
„Alice," I moaned. I was desperate to tell her about James even if I was soon to be a toast.
„What if... could I suck the venom back out, Carlisle?" Edward's voice was desperate.
„I don't think you could. The venom has spread in her system already. There's no way," Carlisle said with a drop of sadness in his voice.
I was still burning and I had no idea what were they talking about. I was wondering why didn't they put the fire out. It was the worst pain in my life and it seemed to spread in my body.
I couldn't see my burning hand because Carlisle held my head still.
„Stop the fire!" I screamed again.
Suddenly I saw Edward's face just a few inches from mine.
He whispered: "Bella? Bella! Listen to me! There is no fire, James bit you." His voice became bitter, "You're turning into a vampire. I'm so sorry, Bella! I never wanted it to happen. I'm sorry."
He apologized. For what? For a second I felt happy. I could be with Edward for all eternity. Then I felt a new kind of pain in my neck. I screamed.
"What are you doing, Edward?" Carlisle's voice asked. The pain I felt in my neck was starting to feel as the burning pain in my hand. I screamed once again and I couldn't stop. My voice was filling the room and there was nothing I could do. I couldn't stop screaming because I just couldn't handle the pain.
"I… When there's more venom in her system, it takes less time." I felt a pain in my other hand.
„Edward, you have to stop. She's losing too much blood," Carlisle warned.
„Kill me," I screamed.
„We have to get her out of here," someone said. It was Alice.
I felt a pair of arms picking me up like I was easy as a feather. I felt a hand on my screaming mouth. I felt wind for a second and then I was in a strange car with feader seats and dark windows. I closed my eyes. I thought it would make the pain go away. Maybe I could fall asleep and it would be better then. Could I fall asleep when...
„Edward," I moaned, trying to sound as pain free as possible, „is it possible to fall... to... fall asleep?"
„No, I don't think so," it wasn't Edward. It was getting harder for me to think clear or even remember anything.
„Where's..." I couldn't finish.
„Edward is with Carlisle. Jasper and I are taking you to somewhere safe." So it was Alice.
Pain. Pain. Pain. More pain. I was burning. Kill me. I can't do this. That was all I could think about but I didn't say anything. I wanted to cry but I had no tears. I wanted to scream but I knew it didn't help me.
I barely felt when the car stopped and Alice held me like a baby and we were running and we didn't stop.
I started to count. When I was at 946 I heard a familiar, very worried voice.
„Bella, I'm so sorry," it said. So sorry, so sorry.
It's OK I wanted to say, just kill me now and everything will be alright, but I didn't open my mouth because I didn't want Edward to be more worried. I tried to stay still as well but I didn't succeed. I grabbed the soft carpet and pulled it. I was afraid I was going to destroy it completely.
2670... 2671... 2672... I counted.
Mostly my eyes were closed. Sometimes when I opened them I could see Edward's tortured face. He just looked at me like he wanted to cry when I asked him to kill me. He never left my side. I wanted him to. He needed to hunt and I couldn't stand his face. It was just like was sharing my pain.
I didn't know if it was day or night, there were no windows in the room but the room was well lightened. The room was overall well decorated. Two armchairs and a sofa, paintings on the walls, a bookshelf with a lot of books, the carpet I was lying on.
In a few hours Carlisle came. I wondered where Alice had gone. Maybe hunting. I didn't care. I was wondering if Carlisle was merciful enough to kill me.
"Kill me!"
"Bella, I know this hurts," hurts? I was burning! "but you have to stay strong, two more days."
Two days… So I had burned one day. It felt like an eternity. How am I supposed to suffer two more days, two more eternities? I might as well die.
I heard Carlisle talking in a silent voice. "Edward, you have to go hunting, I will take care of Bella. And Alice will soon be here."
"No," Edward pushed through his teeth, "I won't leave her. It's my fault. I wasn't fast enough. I could have saved her. She could still be human. I ruined her life."
I didn't want to hear them talking so I tried to concentrate on something else. Unfortunately it's barely impossible when you're burning. I tried harder.
I was thinking about my mother. What would she think? I will be beautiful, my eyes will be different, I would be different. I the only way is to fake my own death. It will ruin her. I can't do this but I have to. She would be more than suspicious when she'd see me like that. I tried to picture it. Me, a vampire, and my mother in the same room. She would be terrified. But maybe she wouldn't even recognize me. That hurt me even more and besides, I couldn't risk that.
And Charlie… He just got me back. But I had hurt him so bad. Edward said he would forgive me but what's there to forgive if he will never see me again. The sadness almost as strong as the pain at this moment.
At some point I heard Alice arriving. She tried to convince Edward into leaving me for a while but he didn't obey. He stayed and so did Alice. She didn't say anything, just sat beside me and looked at nothing.
13 542… 13 543… 13 544…
I was surprised how I could count, think and hear people talking at the same time.
"One day, 6 hours and 24 minutes," Alice said, seeing my question. I sighed. I was half-way through.
I started to hear better and smell better. I didn't want to open my eyes but I was sure I could see better, too. I could hear the clock ticking in some other room. Tick-tock. Tick-tock. I could hear Alice's silent breathes – it seemed like Edward wasn't breathing at all. I could smell wood, it must have been the bookshelf. I smelled the books, I used to love the scent but now it didn't seem so good.
I had started all over again with counting but now I didn't count so slowly, I counted seconds so I would now when the end is near. I was at 72608 when Alice stood up and left without saying a word.
"Where…" I wanted to ask where she went but my throat was killing me.
"She went to get Carlisle." Funny, I hadn't noticed him leaving. Why wouldn't Alice just call him? Maybe she hadn't taken a phone with her.
I had approximately 8 hours to burn and I needed a distraction but I couldn't get myself to say a word to Edward.
Soon Carlisle and Alice arrived. Carlisle asked how much time have I left and Alice said 6 hours and 53 minutes. That was almost comforting. I noticed my breaths were deeper now and I had a urge to open my eyes. I didn't.
108 492… 108 493… 108 494… I had less than an hour left. I felt the pain fading from my toes and finger tips. I felt relieved. It must be over real soon.
Then I felt a bigger pain in my heart, just like it would suck all the pain from my body and gather it to one place. I lost my control and screamed in agony. I felt my body twisted in weird angles. It was because of the pain. I had to stop screaming. My throat was almost as bad as my heart and it was also so dry. I wanted to drink. I needed some water.
Suddenly I stopped screaming. I didn't need water, it was blood I desired.
Now that I was silent I heard my heart. It wasn't beating in rhythm. It was getting faster and faster.
"Listen," said Edward's ever so smooth voice, "it's ending."
"Two more minutes," Alice announced happily.
My heart had sucked all the flames from my body in one big fire ball. I felt tears coming but still they didn't. I rolled on the floor in agony and tried to breathe. Soon there was barely a pause between my heartbeats. The fire was unbearable in my heart and then it stopped. The fire was put off and my heart did it's last heartbeat. That was it.
I didn't breathe, neither did Carlisle, Alice or Edward.
It was over. I opened my eyes.
