Harry Potter and the Enchanted TV!!!
A/N: This is just a short, funny story which came to me (Tom). I hope you enjoy it and have a laugh.
Harry is on the train to Hogwarts.
Ron had recently and very stupidly turned his mam into and rat, which he boiled and ate forgetting she was a rat. Arthur was not too happy! In fact he was extremely angry so angry that he lost control and broke Ron's arm!
Hermione, who had been reading magic for dummies, just gave up and threw the book out the window. She forgot that the window had been closed earlier that morning, and as the book hit the window with such force the glass broke.
It was thundering and lightening outside and Harry said, "Wonderful weather where are having outside, eh?"
"Yes, its glorious isn't it," replied Ron
Hermione was in a bit of a mood and had had enough of Harry and Ron's sarcasm. So she screamed back at them, "No it's not you idiots!" But then Hermione let out an actual scream. "I've just saw a thing with a green face and underwear on their head fly out the window!"
Suddenly the door flew open and in came Draco Malfoy. He looked quite amused but at the same time distressed. "Professor McGonagall has just fell through a window and got fried!"
"Really!" said Ron speedily.
"Yeah, I know isn't it cool!" replied Malfoy. He then realised his mistake and said, "I'm only joking!" Everyone except Ron was staring at Draco.
"You….." but she was interrupted by Harry rejoicing.
"That's one teacher down and half a billion left!"
Just then a fat kid from Brownies club smashed down the door and said in a fast accent, "Some one named Crab has been eaten by a TV!"
"Was it a real Crab?" asked Draco quizzically. Someone must have hit him with the confondo spell.
Everyone looked stupidly at Draco except for the fat Brownie kid. "I don't know I couldn't tell the difference" said the girl truthfully.
Hermione, Ron and Harry had there fingers crossed whispering, "Human Crab, Human Crab, Human Crab!"
"Well I've got to get back to poaching" said the Brownie kid.
"Wait a minute, I thought you went to Brownies!" said Draco obviously trying to redeem himself.
"I do….. for 21 – 30 year olds." She answered sincerely. Then she pulled out a rifle and started to skip down the hall.
"She's gone." gasped Draco. Everyone was very relieved. "Wait… was that TV there before?" stuttered Draco.
"No it wasn't." said Ron in a voice only the dogs could hear.
Everyone screamed. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"Anything from the trolley dears?!" said the dear old trolley lady.
"No thanks I'm set." cried Ron dramatically while pulling out a mouldy apple from his pocket. He then looked at Harry. Harry simply shook his head.
"Ok then but I'll be back when you least expect it. HAHAHAHAHA!" she said in an evil man voice and walked away with an evil grin on her face.
"I don't think that's a woman." said Harry when the trolley lady was out of ear shot.
"Where here!" cried Hermione.
"Where?" said Ron stupidly
"HOGWARTS!" cried Hermione.
"Look there's Hagrid!" said Harry happily as they stumbled off the train. Harry jumped into Hagrid's awaiting arms.
"A bit eager there Harry." But none the less Hagrid hugged him back.
"Ok let's go," Said Hagrid. "On the boats everyone and row it yourselves." Hagrid started jumping from boat to boat, to check everyone was rowing.
They arrived at Hogwarts and they saw a new professor called Feezle-bubbu-washibonga-flabba, but everyone called him Fizzy. Everyone always talked when he talked because he was a teacher that had no control of students.
"Can everyone…"
"Blah blah blah...." said some of the students.
"Can everyone shut up before I get call for Dumbledore?" Fizzy shouted. "Right good, I was going to say you could go for the feast in the Great Hall but instead you can just go to your roomsssssssssssssssssssssssss." He said snake-ishly. Just then a TV ate Fizzy and then legged it down the hall.
The next day word got out that all of Slytherin had been eaten, including Snape. They had been eaten by a TV with bad graphics. Harry was very pleased with this.
Just then Harry found out that the TV was outside the common room eating people. Harry cleverly picked up his invisibility cloak to get out of the room. The TV was confused when the portrait hole opened and no one came out.
A kid was crying in the corner of the room. When they saw Harry they said that Hermione and Ron had been eaten together.
"Christmas come early" said Harry happily.
Harry started thinking. He thought so hard that steam started coming out of his ears. A first year boy walked but to Harry. "Are you okay?"
"Shut up, I'm thinking" yelled Harry.
Everyone was in the Great Hall and Dumbledore started talking. Harry stormed up to the front of the Hall and threw Dumbledore out of the way.
"I have something I'd like to say. We must stop this walking TV that haunts us."
"Yeah, let's go for it!" shouted Dumbledore. The TV entered the Hall and instantly everyone whipped there wands out. Harry grabbed the Gryffindor sword, which conveniently happened to be on the floor.
Harry charged at the TV and swung the sword at it. He missed and chopped the cable.
Everyone cheered!
"It is a victory, a victory for the Fox Channel!" cried Harry, re-phrasing the famous WW1 quote.
You may ask why everyone acted so weird this year at Hogwarts. Well let's just ask Voldemort.
"What a waste of stupidity and dumbo spells, even when Harry is hit with a stupid spell he still manages to beat me!" Voldemort continued to moan and cry.
A/N: This story is not supposed to be a serious story. I was a bit down and decided I needed a bit of cheering up, so wrote a funny story. Hope you found it funny! Please give me another minute of your time and press the green button just below. Thank you.
Tom =)
