Two years ago my life changed and I suppose right now I'm coping well. Sure, it was a difficult time and I guess I coped with it better back then but now it was getting the better of me. I suppose the drama from then only just kicked in and even now, everyone says they can see it in me. All I do now it sit in my room, avoiding everyone and it sucks really.

You see, two years ago I fell in love with my best friend, Jack Barakat. It was my birthday and he told me how he felt. It was going to happen sometime and I failed to tell myself that at the time. I said to myself that best friends always try and see if they can be more than friends... unfortunately that was the case and it didn't go as planned. A year before then I'd cheated on my then-boyfriend with Jack's best friend Alex and hoping to keep it a secret, Jack's ex girlfriend went and told everyone whilst on tour with Alex's bands and supports. That's how it ended between me and Jack. Searching for support, I went to a guy called John, lead singer of The Maine and spent the rest of the tour with him. We got it on before tour finished and I had to leave him.

I spent my time after with my friends and the boy's from One Direction who'd I'd met on a shopping spree (yes, that easily). I thought everything was fine until I was told that John was involved in a car crash. And well... he was killed.

That was what made me suffer so much these past few years. I wasn't affected that much for some reason but now it was killing me. We'd had the funeral and everything and even then, I wasn't affected that much. But I guess it's thinking back on everything and even talking about it is a problem.

Anyway, current life is okay. Jordan had her child with Harry and it was a boy. Harry was pleased and so was Jordan because of the thick dark curls he'd inherited from Harry. She named him Jason Edward and he turned 2 last week. My current boyfriend Louis, who's also Harry's best friend, is probably the person I can relate to the most.

Life now was just basically a routine for me now. I finished studying at college with Jordan but we stayed on to do our degrees at the same college. She was doing a degree in Maths while Harry was looking after Jay and I was studying Music Practice. I really wanted to become a tour manager after hanging around with Flyzik, the tour manager for All Time Low (Alex's band), for a while when we were all on tour.

So, the day started when I woke up to the sounds of arguing and a few balloons popping.

Wait, balloons?

I dragged myself out of bed and attempted to go and find out what was going on. I was still living with the boys and Jordan and Jess but I didn't think they minded. Of course, all three of us got attention from media, about the fact that we were dating 'some of the most popular guys in history' but I just shrugged and walked away if they caught sight of me in the street.

I opened the bedroom door, the bedroom I shared with Louis and walked out to the hallway, just to walk straight in him.

'I thought you learned to look where you're going the first 5 times you did that.' His voice echoed in me and made me weak at the knees. If his voice did that, you'd imagine what his face did. Luckily, I wasn't in the mood this morning to be all love-sick over my boyfriend.

I stumbled and Louis grabbed me by the arms and pulled me against the wall trying to steady me, but taking it as an advantage. He started kissing me, and slowly making his way down to my neck but I pushed him away and shook my head.

'No, Louis. Not now.' I said quietly but he pretended not to hear. He continued kissing me and I responded but not as enthusiastically as he did. I felt all my desire for him melt away but I denied it, scared that if I admitted it, I'd carry on thinking like that. I felt so tired, I wanted to fall asleep right there. I mean, it wasn't as if me and Louis hadn't gotten 'intimate' because we had. Apparently, we were more intimate than Liam and Jess and Harry and Jordan put together... a Jordan had a child.

When Louis pulled away, he stared at me with his inky blue eyes. He smiled cheekily at me and I couldn't help but laugh. He lifted his finger to my chin and raised my head.

'That's better.' He said softly. He knew everything I went through and he was the most sympathetic towards me. He witnessed everything, from John's death to Jasmine, Jack's bitch-filled ex.

Speaking of her, I hadn't seen or heard of her since she disappeared that night I collapsed. She told me that she'd dreamt about John dying and I thought it was another pile of bullshit but it turned out she was right after all. That was another one of the reasons why I felt so down about myself and feeling like it was my fault that I didn't listen to her. The more I thought of John, the worse my feelings got. I mean, two years ago there were a few signs that told me he was still with me and he was happy but I just felt uncomfortable... this stuff was affecting me way too much.

Louis distracted me from my intense daydreaming and took my hand.

'C'mon, let's go downstairs.'

Louis dragged me downstairs and into the living room where everyone was sat. Harry and Jordan were attempting to blow up balloons whilst keeping an eye on Jay who was running around in circles. Jess and Liam were arguing over what went in next for a cake and Zayn and and Niall were sorting out banners and other various decorations and it wasn't going very well...

I stood in the doorway, holding onto Louis' hand and coughed quietly. Jay seemed to be the only one to notice me and screamed, 'Aunt Chloe!' before making the rest of the group jump at his little screaming voice. Harry was suddenly alert in case the screaming was for anything else but relaxed when he saw me in the doorway.

'But nothing's ready!' Niall complained, throwing a banner on the floor.

I finally smiled when they all screamed, 'happy birthday!'