Jane stared down at the cardboard box full of pregnancy tests and her jaw went slack.

"Oh my God, Darcy," she finally choked out. "I asked you to get one, not one whole stores worth!"

Darcy wondered round from behind her friend, perching down on the bed beside her generous purchase. She not to be weirded out by the thought that the reason the box full even existed in the first place was because of certain – hem – activities that had occurred in said bed behind her. She folded her arms over her chest protectively. "Three stores worth actually."

Jane shot her a wild eyed look.

"I wanted to be sure okay!" Darcy protested, bearing her palms defensively.

Rolling her eyes, Jane sighed. Well, she thought, she was a scientist. And wasn't repetition key when performing a science experiment? If the box couldn't give her a reliable, conclusive result she didn't know what would.

Reluctantly, she plucked a test from the masses and held it gingerly. "Fine." She eventually said, eyeing the little box in her hand warily "… I guess."

She still couldn't believe Darcy had filled the cardboard box to the brim; she'd given her the box as a means of concealment more than anything else. If – God forbid! – Darcy had run into Thor, she could use the 'I'm bringing more lab equipment' excuse. Thor may be fascinated by Jane's research but the technology she used still confused him to the brink of madness. Thor wouldn't be able to get away from the box fast enough, and Darcy's path would be clear.

The only real issue was Heimdall: Darcy could lie through her teeth to the gatekeeper if she wanted to but that still wouldn't stop him from being able to see what she was really doing once she was on Earth. Thankfully, Jane knew he would only tell if Thor asked him directly.

Then she'd be screwed.

For now though, the plan had worked and the box was safely in Thor and Jane's bedroom, while Jane rallied herself up.

They'd been in Asgard for little over a month. Thor had brought her back to meet the parents and after she'd arrived, Jane decided she liked it way better here than being pestered by S.H.I.E.L.D back on Earth. Erik hadn't seen it the same way. He refused to even come in the first place. Darcy, on the other hand, had been more than keen, treating Thor's home realm like her personal summer retreat. That was, at least, what her glowing tan from bathing under the glorious Asgardian sun suggested.

"How much did all this cost?" Jane frowned down at the box in her hand, finger flicking at the fifteen dollar price sticker.

Darcy shifted uncomfortably on the beds edge. "Let's just say Erik could have bought an iPod and a new laptop for the money I spent on those."

Jane's jaw dropped. "You used Erik's credit card?"

"Well, you're like his adopted daughter anyway!" Darcy's lips pursed. "It's the least he could do after not coming to meet your future in-laws."

The test dropped numbly back into the box as Jane buried her face in her hands, groaning. "He's gonna kill me! Not just how much you spent but when he finds out what it's for …" her wide eyes peeked out from behind her fingertips. "Thor is so dead."

"Don't you mean you are so dead?"

"No," Jane dropped her hands to her sides again, staring at Darcy hard. "Thor is so dead."

Darcy shifted awkwardly on the bed again, averting her eyes elsewhere around the grand bedroom as she realised just what Jane meant. Even more reason to just stay in Asgard, she thought starkly in her head. "Sorry if I just unmanned your boyfriend." She eventually coughed into her hand. Her eyes swivelled round to Jane again. "But we don't even know if Thor needs to worry yet! Hurry up – I'm not good with waiting!"

Jane bit back a remark (settling with a glare) and gathered up the box, groaning slightly under its weight. She shuffled to the bathroom with her stomach in knots.

XXX

Two hours later, Darcy was flat out on the bed examining every inch of the intricate white ceiling. She was getting bored. No, scratch that; she'd been getting bored over an hour and a half ago. Now, she was brain dead comatose.

"Are you done yet?" she called out.

She was fully prepared for another 'No!' or 'In a minute!' or even a 'You bought so many, give me a goddamn chance to get through them!' as had been hurled back at her over the last hour or so. She'd been keeping a mental tally as to which snap seemed to Jane's favourite. What she didn't bet on (and had zero points on the score board) was silence. Darcy jerked herself upright on the bed, frowning at the bathroom door nervously as that was exactly what she got.

"Jane?"

Silence.

Darcy slipped off the edge of the bed and crept to the bathroom, picking over stray books and clothes that lay discarded on the floor. Yeah, she'd been bored. So she'd had a little leaf through the bedroom to try and amuse herself. The ceiling had been more interesting than the science books and jeans Jane possessed!

She pressed her ear up near the door to try and hear something, whether it be a sob or a trickle to indicate Jane was in the middle of another test. It was neither.

Again – stark silence.

She was starting to get anxious. "Jane, are you okay?"

The light click of the door unlocking answered her and Darcy stepped back. Jane looked pale as she stepped out, moving with almost robotic steps. What did that mean?, Darcy half screamed in her head. Shocked or disappointed? She watched round eyed as Jane wondered out and flopped on her back over the bed, her mouth hanging open slightly. She threw her arms over her head.

Darcy kept her hand on the door handle, trying to fight the urge to peek inside the bathroom. "Well?" she gulped. The suspense was killing her! "What's the result?"

A "Go see for yourself." stifled from between Jane's arms and Darcy didn't need telling twice, darting through the door into the bathroom, eyes finding the box on the floor beside the sink instantly. She kicked her way through the cascade of small package boxes to get to the bulk. Her eyes were wide behind her glasses as she peered over the cardboard edges, tensing herself as if it were her future she was leaning in to find out. Her vision was attacked instantly with bright, angry red plusses and double lines gleaming out from the lumps of plastic.

"Holy shit!"

XXX

"You're not allowed to tell him."

Darcy nodded obediently, eyes gleaming like a little puppy dog. Jane had her perched back on the edge of the bed, pinning her down lightly with hands on her friend's thighs. Surprisingly, Darcy did as she was told, a little smile pressed into her lips. Jane was still a shade closer to white than her complexion normally was but she'd been jolted back to her senses at Darcy's cursing.

"You're not allowed to tell anyone." She spelled out carefully to the younger woman. "Understand? This is our little secret. Thor can't find out about this until I decide to tell him."

That was going to be a feat in itself, Jane thought to herself. How the hell was she going to tell Thor that she was pregnant with his child? He already had his suspicion that something was wrong with her – he'd been just as concerned with her bouts of recent sickness as she had. But Jane had her skipped period to point her in the right direction of what was wrong with her, rather than Thor simply leaping to the conclusion that she was ill. Her hand rolled over her stomach, which was still mercifully flat. She prayed it would stay that way long enough for her to tell Thor for himself.

She pushed out a breath through gritted teeth, eyes over Darcy's shoulder as she thought. She missed the mischievous glint in her friends gaze.

Jane fell face forward into the bed as Darcy abruptly jerked free, cackling as she raced for the door. Panic flooding through her system, Jane twisted and reached for her but missed, scrambling up from the bed to hunt her down. Damn, Darcy was fast, she thought with wide eyes as she skidded out the door.

Laughter drew her attention down the right side of the corridor.

"DARCY!"

Jane howled after her friend as she flew after her, not caring about the mad stares from guards and servants she received as she went. She just had to get Darcy. That had been an amateur move, letting her guard down like that. She should have known better than to relax around Darcy when she was fuelled with this sort of gossip.

God, what if she told someone?, Jane thought with dread running icily through her system. What if she bumped into Thor's parents? Or Thor himself!

Jane felt her stomach drop to the floor at the prospect and forced herself to move faster. She had to catch her. She threw herself round a corner, just yards behind her friend. Her nerves went into overdrive for every second Darcy was out of her sight. Jane gritted her teeth and reached out, Darcy's shirt tantalisingly close to her fingertips.

Darcy swerved round a corner before Jane could get a grip. Jane tore forward to go after her – when Darcy bounced back and crashed into Jane's side, sending both women sprawling back into the wall behind. A strangled sound somewhere between a grunt and a groan escaped Jane's lips as her back thudded hard into the wall and her friend crushed hard into her front. Her body slumped numbly as she slid to the floor, no strength whatsoever to resist in her winded, stunned state. Darcy didn't seem much better; she slipped to the floor simultaneously, body draping over Jane's knees as her friend leaned against the wall.

What the hell had Darcy hit that bounced back like that?, Jane gasped in her head, eyes rolling up to the ceiling as she waited for the world to still. She must have hit her head on the wall, she reasoned.

Her question was answered almost instantly as her walking wall of muscle of a boyfriend stepped out from around the corner, brow furrowed in adorable concern. He was at her side in a few long strides, kneeling as his large hand cupped her cheek, guiding her eyes to his. "Jane, are you hurt?"

Jane struggled to stop her eyes rolling in her sockets. She shifted her knee – earning a groan from the weakly struggling Darcy.

"No." she sighed, gritting her teeth as she tried to peel herself from the wall. "Just – ow!" Thor offered a helping hand and she took it gratefully. "Just bruised."

She let Thor pull her upright and leaned almost instantly back against the wall. She released his hand as he crouched down again to help Darcy next. Suddenly, her hands shot out. "No!" she half screamed, wide eyes shooting down to the pair, Thor's hand held out waiting to her friend. His gaze frowned at her deeply, utterly bemused. Jane cleared her throat awkwardly. "She, er," her mind searched frantically for something believable, but was quickly distracted by the flash of Darcy's wicked grin. Jane's eyes narrowed, her panicked voice hardening. "She's fine."

Thor straightened up - pulling Darcy with him - and frowned at Jane. She ignored him for a moment as she grabbed at her friend's collar, tugging her to her side before she could run off again.

"Jane, is everything alright?" Thor asked in a deep rumbling voice made Jane go weak at the knees. His piercing blue gaze felt like he could see right through her. "Why were you running with such a speed through the palace halls?"

"She -oomph!"

Jane stuffed her hand over Darcy's mouth before the young woman could betray her, ignoring the way she clawed at Jane's fingers. Jane fought hard to keep Darcy in place, mortally fearing the consequences if she didn't. She locked her eyes on Thor, knowing hers were probably a touch rounder than they should have been. He was frowning. Jane's heart sank; he definitely knew something was wrong.

"Um…" She searched for an excuse, but it was impossible. Darcy's frantic struggling was getting hard to contain. She had to do something fast, else Thor would know her little secret whether she wanted him to or not.

Every instinct in her body was telling her to run, but the though had barely crossed her mind before she dismissed it. Running – what would that do? Thor would catch her within two steps, with his unnatural reflexes and god-like speed, and all she would have done would be to raise his alarm level to dangerous heights. She felt trapped.

But every instinct in her gut was telling her to spill. To tell the truth. To just get it over with before someone else – specifically the woman who was trying to manoeuvre her teeth into Jane's fingers to bite her away – beat her to it.

Her heart pounded as she found herself siding with her gut's set of reasoning.

Jane took a deep breath, calming her wide eyes as much as possible until they glittered up at her god of a boyfriend. "We need to talk." She said as slow and clearly as she could, as much for the sake of her own flittering nerves as much as Thor's. "I've got some news."