72 of the 100 challenge. This was made for pure silliness. Sadly, I already used the title 'fairy tale' for something else. But if you ask me, this has plenty of mischief.

Edit: Thanks for catching that, i'vebecomesonumb. I write these things up and totally forget to check them over for such silly mistakes. Excellent choice in music, BTW.


For all his pessimism, Stork didn't actually believe in hell. When you were dead, you were dead. Hell and heaven were human concepts. Yet, this day, he was willing to believe that such a place did exist.

After all, it was the only term to call the Condor now that Tinky was back.

"Junko!" The Merb nearly screeched, leaning towards the taller species in a shaky wrath. "Either you get that thing to be quiet, or I swear to Atmos I'll drive us right into the near mountain!"

The taller one seemed to shrink back, holding onto his relative of…some sort. The others had honestly last track of just how that twisted family tree worked. "It's not his fault!" The Wallop meekly replied, cradling the infant, which was currently wailing its rather massive lungs out. "He just needs a little nap, and then he'll be fine!"

"Well get to it!" Stork snapped, before turning around and leaving in an angry huff back to his station.

Junko glanced to his other teammates, who had been silent through the entire ordeal, not too sure whose side to take.

Mercifully, Aerrow spoke. "…Okay…Junko, just set Tinky in your room, and he'll…uh…nap. That music box should do it. Right?"

The babysitter looked behind him, making sure Stork was out of hearing distance, before he could speak. "I was gunna use that…but when I went to my room yesterday, it was broken!"

Finn whistled innocently. Which, ironically, made him appear less than so.

Piper rolled her eyes, and stepped towards the troublesome toddler. "I have an idea, Junko…when I was little, my mom used to read me fairy tales to help me get to sleep."

Junko's eyes seemed to light up, and it followed with a bright smile. "That's a great idea, Piper!" He turned away, and began to head to his room, cradling the still crying child. "You hear that, Tinky? You'll be in lala-land real soon!"

It was only when they heard his door close that Aerrow spoke again. "…I don't think we have any fairy tales on board." Radarr nodded in agreement.

"Hey, it's his problem now." Finn shrugged in dismissal. "As is the music box I so did not break, by the way."

"Finn."

"Yeah Aerrow?"

"You know that little voice that tells you what you should and shouldn't say? Get one."


Junko had already arrived at Aerrow's problem. He thought desperately, patting Tinky's back in his ponderings. He wracked his mind, trying to remember any fairy tales from his own youth…admittedly, those were few, as it all it took was the dimming of lights to knock him out cold.

Yet, the fact that Piper brought it up seemed to trigger something…Ah, yes! Hadn't humans implanted many of their cultural tales into modern media? He recalled one in particular.

"Okay, Tinky, I'm gunna tell you a story." He informed the young one, moving him so they could look each other in the eyes. This caught Tinky's attention, and he seemed to settle for a moment. "It's called Cinder…Cinder…"

…What was it now? Ellen? Eliza? Elphaba? The baby's eyes began to water, and Junko panicked internally…if he began to cry again, Stork was going to…

…Hmmm.

"This is the story of CinderStork." He finished, with a smug look on his face.

"Once upon a time, there was a huge kingdom. I mean really big. With burger stands on every corner! And, in this kingdom, there was a little Merb, named Stork, and his family. They were a happy family…but one day, his mom died from…

Uh…from…"

"It was the mindworms. Went right up her nostril and devoured every single nerve."

"Uh, yeah! So the father and son were really sad. So sad, in fact, that the dad married really quickly to the next woman he met. It was 'cause he was so lonely, that he didn't realize was a mean lady she was. She came with two sons who were just as mean as she was…and…

…Uh…"

"Snipe is the best at pushing others around! Isn't that right, Dark Ace?"

"Refrain from speaking to me. I'm still trying to deal with how Master Cyclonis is our mother."

"…Yeah! Their names were Dark Ace and Snipe. They made Stork do all the chores, and cook all the food, and be their slave. It was really rough. Poor guy. They even called him CinderStork…because…"

"Because Snipe couldn't come up with a good name to save his life. That, and if I didn't pick up all the cinders, we would most likely have inhaled them and blackened our lungs to a night hue."

"Anyway, one day, the King announced he was holding a ball, so that his beautiful daughter, the princess Piper, could choose a husband."

"Honestly, one fangirling fit over Starling, and daddy can't rush me to the altar fast enough. Sheesh."

"CinderStork was really excited, and didn't even mind making his step-brothers' tuxes, because he thought he'd get to go."

"Can you blame me? I could head to the dungeons and see all their torture equipment. I could learn so much."

"But, remember, these guys, they were so mean! On the night of the ball, they said he couldn't go because he was all in rags. They made him stay home, and pick up all the cinders again. When they left, he was really, really sad. But, then, outta nowhere, out came his Fairy Godmot –

…er…

...His Fairy God-Finn!"

"Oh you've got to be kidding me."

"Hey, at least you aren't a fairy! Dude, this is so lame. Is this because I broke your music-box? Uncool!"

"The Fairy God-Finn knew that Stork was a really good guy, so he decided to help him out! Using his fairy magic, he made him a carriage…I mean…a Condor! Yeah! And then he poofed him up some real nice clothes…including…"

"Special goggles that can detect brain tumors! Ticking time bombs."

"Right, that'll work. But the Fairy God-Finn told him that he had to be back home by midnight, 'cause that's when the magic would run out."

"It's because you made me a freakin' fairy! And I didn't break your music box. Totally Radarr."

"At the ball, the princess Piper wasn't interested in any of the guys there. She was going to give up, but then a newcomer came into the castle. It was a really handsome Merb! It was love at first sight."

"Hey, he has crystal cufflinks!"

"No brain tumors on her. Neat."

"So CinderStork asked the princess to dance, and everyone was really impressed by how good they were. Not even the mean step-family realized who it was that was dancing with her."

"That would be because Snipe is an idiot, and I was distracted by the fact that Cyclonis is our mother."

"They had a really good time…but, uh, then! The clock struck midnight! CinderStork remember the Fairy God-Finn's warning, and ran outta there! Piper tried to run after him, but all she could find were those goggles."

"It was an epic fall down those stairs, let me tell you."

"By the time CinderStork got home, the magic had worn off, and when the family got back, no one was any the wiser."

"Which, for Snipe, isn't saying much."

"One more of those remarks and you're gunna get a Snipe Smash!"

"But the king and princess were real upset. They really wanted to find that guy! Piper, she was really smart, she decided to fit the goggles on every single guy in the kingdom until they fit the right one. It took 'em a while, but they finally got to CinderStork's house. Of course, it didn't fit Snipe's head, and it didn't fit the Dark Ace's either. The princess was getting really upset."

"You'd be upset too if Master Cyclonis was giving you that weird look."

"She asked if there were any more guys in the house, but they were like no, 'cause they never would have guessed CinderStork would fit it. But CinderStork said that was okay…because he had another pair!"

"That fairy took my Condor! I had to get some sort of consolation prize!"

"Piper was really happy to find her guy, and so they got married, and lived happily ever after, but the mean family didn't, because they were mean. The end."

Junko was startled at the long pause that came after his story. He looked down, and, thankfully, Tinky was fast asleep. The mechanic leaned back against the headboard of his bed, rather proud of himself. "Maybe I should write a book." He mused to himself.


Oddly enough, Aerrow was getting some lunch, and suddenly felt very grateful for being left out of something. He blamed it on the food.

End. (or Happily Ever After, if preferred.)