Kirara crept around the bend of the cave and stood hidden in the shadows watching him. He looked so sad, so lonely. His fur, normally so glossy, was dull and matted. How long had he been here? It had taken her so long to find this place. The whole month maybe? She could see his ribs from here, and she knew he must have come here to die. Starvation was a hard way to go, especially for youkai because it took then three times as long to reach the end, but that was the honorable way for youkai to die. In battle. Never mind that he battled hunger and not another warrior. She wouldn't let that happen to him.

"Kagome..." he muttered and curled tighter into a ball, "my mate."

No Kouga. Not Kagome, but I will be yours if you'll have me. Just wait a little bit longer.

Kirara turned and disappeared back into the forest.

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As she hunted, she thought back to all the times they'd fought together. They were never really on the same team, but they sometimes fought common enemies. However, it had not been during one of those times, but rather, during one of Kouga's battle with Inuyasha that she realized he could understand her.

She was so used to not being understood by her companions that it shocked her when she growled at him to look behind him and he actually did, jumping out of the way of Inuyasha's sword just in time. He'd even muttered a small thank you to her as he left. She purred at the memory.

"Thanks, cat. You really helped me out back there." he said as he walked by.

"You're welcome, wolf." she'd said to his back. She watched him disappear into the forest before returning to the fire with her companions.

She guessed it was because he was full youkai and not human or hanyou. He understood her, and because of that she had liked him. Over the years they had fought together, speaking occasionally, saving each other's lives once or twice. Before she knew what was happening, it had become more than just liking. She'd begun to love him, even if she knew he loved Kagome. Still, she never told him. Though they were both youkai, he was human in form, and he would want a mate that was similar to him in form. It was no wonder he loved Kagome. She was powerful and beautiful, gentle and strong. Kirara knew there was no hope that she could compete with the miko, so she pushed her feelings back, feeling herself die inside each time he told Kagome he loved her.

Then, a little over a month ago, Kagome and Inuyasha finally got over their stupidness and he'd claimed her as his mate. It was really about time they made it official. Kirara had been happy for the pair... at least until he arrived.

He'd looked so happy to see Kagome at first, and then he caught her scent. First shock, then pure anguish flooded into his face as he realized Inuyasha had marked her already. He didn't say anything. He just smiled weakly at Kagome, tears welling up in his eyes, and fled. It was so strange. He'd always been so ready to fight before, and now for him to just give up and leave... Kirara, being an adult youkai knew what happened when a male's mate rejected him, and it frightened her. She'd waited until everyone wasn't looking and snatched the shikon jewel before she followed him. She was happy that he'd finally realized Kagome wasn't for him, but at the same time it broke her heart to see him in so much pain. Was this how Kagome had felt before Kikiyo had finally moved on and let her soul rejoin with Kagome's? Yes, she thought so.

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She returned dragging the body of a large deer. Kouga woke with a start, snarling at her unexpected intrusion, but was unable to lift himself up. He struggled to sit and finally settled for propping himself on his elbows. Kirara mewed in sadness at seeing him weakened so. She placed her kill before him and ripped the stomach open, offering him the blood rich liver to help recover his strength.

"What are you doing, cat? Can't I die in piece?" he asked, turning away.

"No." she responded cooly, and placed the liver under his nose, "You won't take the coward's way, Kouga. She's only a woman!"

He stared at the meat for a moment before leaning down and taking a small bite. It took him several moments, but he finally finished it and lapped up the blood. It seemed to have given him a little strength because he was able to push himself up to a sitting position and lean against the cave wall, gasping for breath after such exertions.

"So, cat, what do you want with me?" he asked gruffly between pants.

"My name is Kirara, not 'cat'," I growled, and he smiled a weak smile.

"Ok then, Kirara. Why did you track me down? I went to great pains to ensure no one would find me. Did someone send you to find me?" he spat.

I shook my head as I looked at the floor, "No, Kouga, I came of my own accord. I was worried about you."

He grunted and was silent for a long time, "She ain't just a woman, you know. I loved her, and she chose that damn mutt!" he ripped of another chunk of the meat he'd been eating, "What does he have that I don't?" he asked.

Kirara sighed, "I guess only Kagome knows that, Kouga. You cannot control love," she said in a quiet voice. He was silent after that. She forced him to eat some more of the deer before he fell asleep, and then she went to the mouth of the cave to keep watch for the night.

Over the next few days he slowly began to regain his strength. Kirara was always by his side, bringing him food and water or just keeping him company. She brought him back from the brink of death, and he seemed to slowly regain his spirits. Finally, one night, he asked her if he could go hunting with her. She wasn't sure if he was well enough, but it was the first time he'd shown any interest in going outside again, so she agreed.

She flew over him as he ran, ready to help him if he grew weak again, but he seemed to have fully regained his strength. They went far afield in search of good game, listening to the forest for any sounds. Before the sun had fully risen, they'd brought down a bear and feasted well on its flesh. They sat together in the clearing, feeling content as the sun rose on the new day. Kirara was almost asleep when Kouga spoke.

"So, Kirara, what do I do now? My mate has chosen that mutt over me, and you won't let me die. What am I supposed to do?"

Kirara sighed, "Well, you could move on... take a new mate."

Kouga was silent for a long time before whispering, "But I'm a wolf. We mate for life."

He had been leaning on Kirara's back, and fell to the ground when she jumped up and faced him, "Kagome was never your mate, Kouga! If you could just see that then maybe you could let someone who really wants you have a chance!" she roared, tears welling up in the corners of her yellow eyes.

Kouga looked shocked, "What do you mean, Cat?" he asked as he pushed himself up off the ground.

"MY NAME IS NOT CAT!" roared Kirara, and the forest shook with the sound of her voice.

Kouga looked at her, his blue eyes locking with her golden ones, "Kirara... tell me what you mean. Who would possibly want me? I mean, Kagome chose a half breed over me. I'm nothing!"

She hung her head and let the tears spill from her eyes and mat the fur of her muzzle, "I want, you stupid wolf. You're something to me." she cried and collapsed in a heap on the ground, reverting back to her tiny kitten form and covering her face with her tails.

She was surprised when she felt Kouga's hands lift her up and pull her to him. She could feel his heart racing from where she lay against his chest. His voice was so tender as he spoke to her, "Kirara... I... don't know what to say... You've been a good friend. You saved my life, and I care for you, but ... but how can we be mates? We're... not the same..." he muttered as he stroked her fur.

"No..." she whispered, "but that can change, if you'll have me."

He pulled her away from him, holding her out like a doll in front of his face, his hands under her front legs, "What do you mean? How?"

She lifted her head slightly to reveal the shikon jewel. It was hung from a string around her neck, and was hidden under her fur most of the time, "It's not just for making youkai more powerful, you know. It can make a hanyou into a human or... give a youkai a different form. I could become a wolf youkai like you, have a more human looking body so we'd be compatible... but only if you will have me. I like being a cat too much to change for no reason." she said in a calm voice, but her eyes begged him to say the right thing, to say he'd have her.

"No, Kirara..." he said softly, and her heart sank.

She mewed pitifully and jumped from his hands, "I guess this is goodbye then," she said as she began to walk away.

"Wait!... I didn't mean for you to go. I only meant that... I don't want you to become a wolf. You can take a different form and still stay mostly a cat, can't ya?" he asked, his voice shaky.

She stopped and glanced over her shoulder, "Yes... but do you really want that, Kouga? Do you want me as your mate?" she asked hopefully.

He paused and smiled at her back, "Yeah. Anyone who saves my life is entitled to that much, and you ain't so bad for a cat."

Kirara did a little flip in midair and ran to him, changing first into her large cat form as she ran and then lept into the air, shimmering with a white light so bright that it blinded the wolf for a moment. When his sight came back, he was holding a slender woman with skin and hair white as fresh snow, black cat ears and two long, white tails spread out behind her like the train of a gown. She looked up at him with her golden eyes and grinned, her fangs glistening in the morning sun. Kouga's breath caught as he stared down into her beautiful face. He'd thought Kagome had been a beauty, but she was plain compared to Kirara. His Kirara.

He leaned down to brush his lips against hers, and was rewarded with a soft purr.

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Later that day, after he'd finished claiming her as his mate, the two of them sat on the banks of the nearby river watching the wind rustle through the tall grass. He was so lost in thought at that moment that he almost didn't realize she had spoken to him.

"What did you say, Kirara?" he looked down at where she lay gazing at the clouds.

"I said you have a problem, my love." she said with the kind of mischievous grin only a cat could manage.

"And what is that?" he asked with a smile.

"How are you going to explain to your pack of wolf brothers that you've chosen a cat as your mate?" she asked, and then began laughing hysterically at the look of worry on his face.