AN: Back to our regularly scheduled fic-purge.


Kelly's always been a past master at hiding his pain from Scotty.

Like that stupid knife-fight, kissing the girl so Scotty would believe Kelly's wound was just a scratch. He saw the gash, the stitches, when Kelly undressed that night, but made no comment. If Kelly wanted it that way, that was the way it would be.

But nothing compares to the betrayal he feels when he discovers that the 'no visitors' thing was Kelly's idea. He called the doctor, telling him it made no sense, as he and the child had already been exposed to Kelly long enough to get sick or get immune – which was when the doctor told him that Kelly begged him for it, begged him to keep Scotty and Ramon away to spare them the sight of his fever, his suffering.

When he found that out, he cornered Ramon's aunt at the pool while Kel was off refreshing her drink, and sure enough, she revealed that Kelly orchestrated his whole theatrical reappearance at Las Brisas with her just to reassure Scotty and Ramon that he's fine, to make Scotty so outraged at his partner supposedly ignoring them both for some bonita that he won't fuss over Kelly.

Why, Kelly? Why did you keep me away? Even now he's seen Kelly alive and well, the memory of those 'No Visitors' days haunts him, the bereft sensation of not having him near after almost losing him disturbing his sleep, finally sending him fleeing to Acapulco, losing himself in showing young Ramon a good time. Why didn't you want me to see you, Kel? I've seen you tortured, I've seen you wounded, I've seen you brainwashed, I've seen you in every state it's possible for a man to be in. You can't still be ashamed of me. You can't think I'll call you less of a man if the pain makes you cry out or you shed a few tears. Anyone can cry, I know that. What is it, man? What?

Was it that perhaps Kelly feared revealing something classified, should he speak in his fever? But they have the same security clearance… and it's not like the doctors couldn't hear it all anyway… Is it that Kelly fears appearing vulnerable before his partner after all this time, still thinking there's anything in the entire universe that would make Scotty lose his respect for him? Is it that? Is it some stupid macho imperative?Is it that Kelly rejects the company of a friend in his illness, the way he once rejected his family, out of a sense of unworthiness?

Or is it truly – and he knows with a sinking feeling that it is – a misguided desire to spare him, Scotty, to calm his fears by protecting him from the sight of Kelly's own suffering?

A little late for that, Jack. Perhaps Kelly doesn't know that not knowing, not being there, is the worst torment of all. That after all these years, it's more of a balm to his soul to be at Kelly's bedside, the idiot, reassuring himself that Kelly's still in the land of the living and offering what comfort he can, than girl-watching and sipping coconut milk by the pool. That no matter what the extremity, there's nowhere he'd rather be than at Kel's side, his stupid, ridiculous, ignorant, deluded ideas to the contrary notwithstanding.

He'll have to enlighten the dum-dum.

Or smack him right in the mouth. One of those, anyway.