This oneshot wouldn't leave me alone. A moment that i think we missed through Hermione's journey, as well as a deeper friendship between her and Tonks. With a little Weasley thrown in at the end. Enjoy.
It was the knocking on the door that roused Hermione from her inner thoughts. She tore her eyes from the large, gilded mirror, unlocking the bathroom door. Tonks popped her head around the frame.
"Sorry Hermione, I wasn't sure if there was anyone in here."
Hermione smiled, the action feeling just a little more forced than usual.
"It's fine, I'm just about done in here anyway."
As she started to gather her wet towel, tightening her bathrobe around her pyjama clad form and grabbing her hairbrush off the side of the ornate sink, Hermione didn't notice Tonks observing her actions with a slight frown. Nor did she realise her hands were somewhat fumbling, almost shaking a little. When Tonks softly closed the door, she stilled.
"Hermione, are you all right?" asked the older woman.
That question. Of all the questions in the world, it seemed to Hermione that a simple 'are you all right' was all it took to solidify the knowledge to yourself that you certainly were not all right. Horrified that a lump had formed in her throat and her eyes prickled with a rush of tears, she slowly shook her head.
Since she refused to look at Tonks she didn't see her eyebrows fly up, but she heard her turn, locking and silencing the door. Then she was pulled into a gentle hug. That was all it took to start Hermione sobbing. It was completely irrational, she knew, when there were so many terrible things going on around them all the time. She felt selfish and vain and guilty. Which in turn made the urge to sob worse.
After a little while, Tonks pulled back, handing Hermione some toilet paper to dry her cheeks. She took a shuddering breath, exhaling slowly to calm herself.
"I'm being ridiculous," she stated.
"You're being a teenage girl," Tonks shrugged. Her dark eyes expressed both understanding and concern when Hermione finally found the courage to look at her. "Want to tell me what brought on the crying jag?"
Hermione began methodically folding the squares of tissue she had, then unfolded it and began ripping it in small, neat sections.
"Sometimes I just worry," she said with an ashamed blush. "About..."
Merlin she felt so embarrassed to admit this to someone. She fought for a way to say it to the patiently waiting woman in front of her. Hermione's eyes took in her face. The eyes. The hair which she still wore bright pink.
"I sometimes would like to be a metamorphagus," she settled on saying, praying Tonks would catch onto her meaning.
Thankfully it seemed she did, from the surprise briefly flitting across her face. It was only brief though; almost instantly her expression turned understanding again, but not in a patronising way.
"Do you want to see how much of my appearance I change?" asked Tonks, a small smile on her face.
Curiosity won over Hermione's embarrassment for a moment and she nodded. Tonks screwed up her face and Hermione watched as her hair lengthened, falling to her shoulders and turning a shade of mousy brown.
That was where the changes stopped.
"When I was your age I used to change quite a lot more," Tonks said honestly, looking in the mirror, her head cocked slightly in thought. "It took a lot out of me back then to keep the changes up. I'd have different hair everyday, hide that irritating teenage skin, make myself curvier than I really was..."
She caught Hermione's eye in the glass and the young girl felt her cheeks burning that her own insecurities seemed to be being voiced through another.
"All the girls were jealous," she said, honestly. "And I got all the boys attention. But everyday I just felt like such a fraud. Because that wasn't me all those boys liked. It was all just an illusion. So in the end, I just started changing my hair. I can tell you, my boyfriend at the time was more than a little shocked when my big boobs disappeared overnight! And the fact her broke up with me the same day just cemented what I knew all along."
Hermione fought a giggle at the chest comment, before turning to study her own reflection.
"My hair is awful," she said eventually, feeling her cheeks burn even hotter. "I'm not pretty like the other girls in my dorm. I am getting curvier, but I think I'm putting on too much weight. I'm not tall enough. I'm just... plain. And I know Viktor took an interest but that's just because I didn't fawn over him like the other stupid bimbos in that school. It had nothing to do with how I look."
She'd been staring so intently at her reflection that she was somewhat startled when Tonks' hand smoothed her hair back from her face, watching as the waves sprung back.
"You're hair is different," she said, looking at Hermione's reflection. "Individual. I bet no one else in Hogwarts has hair like this. It's got a lovely colour and texture to it. You have big brown eyes that show exactly what you're feeling the instant someone looks at you. You're well ahead in the curves department but you don't flaunt them in that way most teenage girls do. And by flaunt I mean let them hang out."
Hermione laughed a little again and Tonks smiled wider.
"You're not fat at all, you're in perfect proportion with your height. Your weight will get heavier, but that's as a result of the changes to your body, not the fact you're too big. You're lucky enough to have a decent complexion for your age. And as for not being tall? You hold a presence about you that towers above a six foot girl Hermione. I mean I've seen you cow Ron into submission he's huge!"
Hermione's heart skipped a little at the mention of his name, but her face didn't betray her. When Tonks grinned at her, she managed to smile back genuinely.
"You're a beautiful young girl Hermione," she said. "And soon you'll be an even more beautiful young woman. It's ok to feel this way, you've got more hormones than blood at the moment. But that doesn't change who you are. Even if you don't fully believe you're beautiful on the outside just yet, even you can't argue that you aren't on the inside."
Tears pricked her eyes again, but not from a dark feeling this time. She nodded to Tonks, and they had another sideways hug.
"Now then," said Tonks, pulling out her wand. "If you'll allow me, I could demonstrate one of the many 'bimbo' related charms I learned at Hogwarts."
With another concentrated face, Tonks' hair returned to her usual, bright bubblegum pink state. Hermione twisted a lock of her own hair nervously. It currently fell down to past her elbows, with no kind of shape to it at all. Just a long curtain of bushy, boring brown locks and a bushy fringe blunt across her forehead.
Tonks looked at her, the question in her eyes. Hermione summoned all her Gryffindor courage and nodded.
"Don't worry I'm not going to chop it all."
Ten minutes later, Hermione felt her hair dry instantly with a final flick of Tonks' wand.
"Why didn't I become a hairdresser?" sighed Tonks, examining her wand. "Such a much more low hazard occupation."
Too busy staring in the mirror again, Hermione didn't hear her at all.
"Do you like it?" asked Tonks quickly. "I can undo everything with a quick transfig-"
"I love it," Hermione breathed.
And she did. Her hair sat below her shoulders now and her whole head felt so much lighter without the weight. Tonks had grown her fringe out with a simple Transfiguration, and it now swept to the side the ends of her hair tickling her ear. The rest had been trimmed to gently frame her face, her features somehow both more noticeable, yet softer too. With the loss of the length, her curls were more pronounced than before. Her hair was still bushy but it just seemed... neater.
But it was her eyes that made her smile. Never in all her life had Hermione not sported that straight fringe. Without it, the focus was straight on her eyes. And it was like she suddenly saw herself with a renewed clarity.
"Thank you!" she squeaked, throwing her arms around Tonks.
With a chuckle, Tonks gave her a squeeze.
"You're very welcome Hermione. Could you do something for me?"
"Of course..."
Tonks released her and shoved her towards the door.
"Get out so I can pee! I'm bursting here!"
With a lightened heart, Hermione laughed and left the bathroom, a skip in her step as the bathroom door closed and locked behind her.
ooooOoooo
Ron was dying for the loo. He didn't know how all of a sudden his bladder seemed to decide it was going to burst unless he immediately peed, but the hell if he was going to ignore it. Pounding down the flight of dusty stairs, he ran full speed into Hermione, who squeaked and stumbled at the impact. Grabbing her wrist, he steadied her.
"Sorry! You all right?"
"Yes – I – yes you just startled me. I'm fine."
Ron sucked in a breath when she looked up at him.
"Your hair..."
She'd done something to it. When Ron used to look at Hermione, the first thing he saw was that wild hair over her forehead. It used to madden him how she could hide behind both a book and her fringe if necessary. Now, her chocolate coloured eyes gleamed at him, unencumbered by all that frizz. Her cheeks flushed and she glanced away. He swallowed, noticing how much more accessible her creamy throat seemed now too.
"Tonks, she – um she cut it for me."
Mmm she was chewing on her full bottom lip like she did when she was nervous and Ron was too distracted to notice the words that left his mouth.
"It's very nice," he said hoarsely.
Looking rather shocked, Hermione looked back at him, eyes slightly wide. She'd released her plush lip and it glistened in the light of the candelabra upon the wall. The flickering played off her curls too. Ron swallowed again.
"Oh, well thank you. That's very nice of you Ron."
Another sucked in breath came, along with a swoop in his stomach as she patted his arm and wiggled past him, disappearing up the stairs. He stood there for a moment, staring after her...
Crap. Now he needed the bathroom for two reasons.
Thanks for reading. All reviews welcome xxx
