disclaimer: not mine, don't sue
dedicated to julia, of course, and to Life (nobody really lacks it)
I Will Never Ask For More Than This
Remission is a wonderful word.
But here aren't any more words to describe what she was feeling.
Relief
Anxiety
An overwhelming Happiness.
She felt that if she wrote everything in capital letters for the rest of her life, it would not be enough to show the world just how excited and absolutely thrilled she was to just be A Live.
The doctors said it would take awhile before she was back on her feet, but Scully knew she was getting better already. She could feel herself getting stronger by the second. And it wasn't just a placebo effect. She had been told for months now that things were looking good, only to have her hopes smashed in a second after a nosebleed or a bad headache. She had been on this roller coaster for too long.
And now she felt she was finally allowed to get off.
She could not ask for more, that night. Her family and her doctors surrounded her, all in awe. Skinner walked in, more confusion on his face than anything. Sometimes he didn't understand that woman. So full of fight and vigor, but nobody could have survived her fate.
Something more powerful than fate had intervened, though. Something possessed by someone secretly… someone who would prove himself to her over and over and over.
Someone who was not in the room.
"I can't believe it, I've never seen anything like this," her doctor muttered, not wanting to spoil the occasion but, really? This woman was at death's door…
"It's a miracle," her mother cried, not caring what had happened, just so that it happened and that her baby girl would be with her for another day. Scully looked up at her mother, wondering where her love extended to. Surely it would kill anyone to see their child die… maybe that was being a mother.
And maybe she'd get to find out one day too.
The look on her face did not accurately portray what was going on inside her mind. An overwhelming Happiness. Reality was setting in and it was amazing to find that this would be a reality. Her reality. A life that was supposed to end.
But there was something missing from this new life. Something she was sure she never wanted to be without ever again.
Her angel.
She grabbed her mother's hand when she realized she couldn't take it anymore. During the frenzied last few weeks, Scully had vaguely picked up on the fact that her brother did not get on well with her partner. But she knew that was not the whole reason he was staying away. He would kill for her, do anything for her, including endure her overprotective brother. There was some other block besides not being entirely welcome.
"Mom," she whispered, clutching her mother's hand with all her strength. She thought she was in such control of her emotions, but they always found some way to get out.
"What is it sweetheart?" her mother asked, leaning forward to talk in her ear and kiss her cheek. It was not so cold anymore.
"Where is Mulder?" Scully asked simply. But she needed to know. She needed him with her.
"Right outside, Dana, probably waiting to talk to you later."
"Well, I need him."
What can a mother say to that? When her daughter has just received the best news of her life, how can she deny her anything that she wants? Not for a few weeks, at least.
"Fox?" Mrs. Scully asked, peeking her head outside the room. There was a party in there. He needed to know that he was invited.
"Yeah Mrs. Scully?" Mulder asked, and it seemed suspiciously obvious to Mrs. Scully that he was trying to wipe away tears.
"Come in side, dear, she's asking for you."
"I'll be in later, Mrs. Scully. I want to give your family time with her."
"There is nothing that says we can't share time. And she wants to see you."
There. Proof. She needed him as much as he needed her. Mulder let Mrs. Scully take his hand and guide him into the room.
She looked like the same Scully in that bed. The same Scully with a cancer-ridden body who was waiting to die. But she wasn't. She had more time now.
It was something that happened. Something that could not be helped. Him losing all sight of everything around him and his body making his way toward her's. He couldn't be stopped. They were magnets.
"Hi," he whispered. Any louder, and it would be painful.
"Hi," she whispered back. No matter what he was feeling, no matter what turn his life had taken, he could always find comfort in her eyes, and now, the fact that they were there for him to get lost in.
Their hands reached for each other. They didn't have a say in it.
Her heart did a flutter. She knew because her heart had not had much reason to do any fluttering lately.
An overwhelming Happiness spread through her like a warm wave.
A second chance
A happy ending
No ending at all…
This is what you did for me. This is what you do for me and will continue to do for me for the rest of my life.
I'll never ask for more than this.
