Katniss's POV

A month have passed since I'v returned to district 12. Some kind of routine has taken place in the victors village. My mom and Prim, who have moved in with me in the new house, pretend that they don't hear me waking up screaming in the middle of the night, when the nightmares become too much. Some morning I see Prim wanting to question the events of the night before, but ager a look of my mother she just shrug it of and leave for school. My mother continues to help the town and the seam people that needs medical attention. She never talk to me unless she's asking me to find a specific kind of plant in the wood. It not her fault though, I think she just doesn't know how to help me anymore. I've been taking care of myself for so long, and to be honest, I don't know either how anybody could help me at this point. anybody who never went in the arena that is.

That brings me to Peeta and I, we are still in an awkward relationship. Ever since he realised everything that happened between us in the games were lies, he keeps his distance from me and I can't blame him for it. He said he understood, that we could still be friend, which is something I'd really like but I don't see that happening anytime soon, not with the way things are evolving. Of course I feel a little guilty about having faked those feeling toward him in the games, but all that acting is the reason we're both alive today. That acting and Haymitch, my dear Haymitch who I understand more with every day that passes. I don't know exactly what it is I feel toward him, I sometime find myself wanting to just hug him and tell him that he's not alone anymore. One thing is clear though, and I'd never tell him that face to face, he is family. Don't get me wrong he is still a real pain in the ass sometimes, but all the drinking, the rudeness and the attitude of an uncaring man, I now know is just a defence mechanisms the protect his heart from the Capitol. After having seen the games up close for 24 years I can only imagine the invisible scars that man has to wear every day of his life.

That is the reason why I've been taking care of him for the past few weeks, and why I'm finding myself in the semi-dark of the early morning dragging my latest catch two squirrels and a rabbit behind me. Plus I can't bear to stay too long in my sister's presence, I feel like I'm no good influence on her anymore and its not like my mom and Prim really need me anymore. We have money and food and I can't do anything more to protect them from the capitol. The biggest danger for them is me messing up and doing something rebellious in president Snow's eyes anyway.

After stopping by the Hob and the bakery to buy some booze and bread, I head to Haymitch's house, on the opposite side of the victor's village. The pace smells really bad, a mixture between sweat, alcohol and dust. Even though I try to maintain the house has clean has possible, I'm not the housewife type, therefore I'm not really good at cleaning and stuff. Haymitch is asleep on the couch, several empty bottles of liquor on the floor. I try to not wake him up because I know he must have had some trouble sleeping last night. His forehead is wrinkled and is hair is sticking to it.

A while later, I've manage to cook a semi-decent breakfast with what I brought from the hob and the bakery and I save the rabbit for later. Haymitch never complaints about my cooking skills anyway. It not like he really cares about what he ingest other than the booze I bring him every now and then. Although I have to give him credit for slowing down on it. I'd never encourage him to keep drinking, but I'd never tell him to stop either. It's about the only thing that ease is pain and make the nightmares more bearable.

I go to the living room and my mentor is still in the same position on his chair. Knowing he sleeps with a knife I don't bother trying to wake him up gently by touching his shoulder, I drop a cold water glass on his head and jump out of the way has the knife is thrown in front of me. « It's just me Haymitch. I made breakfast, come on lets eat. » I say when his eyes find mine. « You know I hate being woken up that way sweetheart » He says grumpily to hide his frighten face from me. I do has I didn't see and fallow me to the kitchen. We eat in silence and once we're done I start picking up the dishes and cleaning the place.

After a minute, I feel Haymich's gaze burning a hole in my back. « What? » I say without turning around. It takes him a second to respond and I barely hear him has it come out a small whisper « Thanks » He says. That makes me turn and face him to see if I heard him right. I try to find his eyes but he is looking at his lap. « Look at me » I say with a soft voice. He look up and my eyes find his. We don't say a thing but, we don't need to, we never did. Everything I need to know is right there in those seam eyes. Gratitude for having gotten out of the arena and for keeping on coming days after days to take care of him so he doesn't feel so alone and like he has the weight of the whole world on his shoulder. To understand him like no other ever since those damn games 24 years ago. To have given a purpose to the hell he endure since that fateful day some weird capitol puppet with a wig drew his name from that glass bowl. And I can't seem to look away from all those emotion I see in those grey orbs. I don't say anything because my brain feels so empty, I've never seen Haymitch show so much of him. He usually have those wall around him so high, it seems like nothing could knock them down. I don't know how koch time we stay that way, frozen. It the opening and closing of the door fallowed by heavy foot step that make me look away and toward the kitchen door where I see Peeta awkwardly standing, his eyes going from me to Haymitch in a confused way.

I than look back at Haymitch and the masque and the walls are up again. I know that the moment we just shared is over and so I turn around to finish cleaning to counter. « Hello Peeta, there's leftovers in the fridge if you'd like » I say a little to cheerful to my liking. He doesn't say anything but takes a plate, sit in front of his mentor and start to eat.

The rest of the day is uneventful, we watch Tv in silence, a glass of liquor on the table next to us. After a while, Peeta is probably uncomfortable because he get up and leave not even bothering to say goodbye.

It is late in the evening when I get back to the house, because that place scream capitol with all the technologie and the fancy counter top and everything, is not my home. I go to the kitchen to drop some of the game I killed earlier today and I see my mother sitting at the table. She looks nervous but determined to talk, her eye fixed on me like a hunter fixe hie prey. « Katniss, we have to talk » She says as soon has she sees me.

Author Note's

So what do you think should I continue ? Review please