I wonder when everything will stop and let me be. I wonder when I can love who I want without my family suppressing my feelings. I'm trying to understand what is so wrong with everything; what is so wrong about this? This love? Isn't love a natural feeling? Why is every family member blowing up about my feelings of love? I know they want an arranged marriage. I know they do. They want to set me up with a nice prince from two kingdoms over. I know this because they have told me. But I don't care! I love the prince from one - just one - kingdom over and I see nothing wrong with that. Just that one little detail - that one little insignificant fact. Why, oh, why, dear God, did my love have to be the prince of the kingdom we already have a swell relationship with? The other prince - the one they want me to marry - is from the kingdom we are on the verge of war with. If I marry him, we're guaranteed safety from war. But no.

I found myself with my love on the eve before my wedding to that dastardly prince. He was holding me ever so gently and I felt as if I could melt there and forever stay there. His arms were warm and comfortable and I never wanted to leave. But I knew I would have to. I had to— else my family literally murders me. "Roderich," I sighed.

Roderich kissed the top of my head and proceeded to place his cheek against mine. "Elizabeta," he sighed softly. He knew that I would have to leave soon, too. And that was the saddest part. "Elizabeta," he said again, "I love you, Elizabeta."

I closed my eyes and willed myself not to cry, to sob, to weep. I forced myself to absolutely cherish these last few minutes with him I had. "I love you, too, Roderich," I whispered. "I wish I could marry you."

"And I you." He squeezed me tighter. "I love you so much. I love you much, much more than the Sun loves to burn." It was then I broke down into sobs.

Roderich, my love. The world was cruel. Ever so cruel. I wanted to stay, to stay with him, to live my life with him, with my Roderich. I wanted to marry him, to have him father my children, to rule a kingdom with him. I wanted to tell him I loved him each and every day, to hear him say the same just as many times. I wanted to know everything there is to know about him; how he looked when nude, how many children he wished to have, how he would treat them, how beautiful he looked when sleeping, how he looked when waking up, just everything about him I wanted to know. Everything.

"Roderich, my love," I choked out. "My love, I love you. I love you."

He held me even tighter. "I know," he whispered back, "I know. I love you, too, Elizabeta."

And suddenly I was no longer in my love's arms. I was pulled roughly pulled up by my arm from my comfy seat (otherwise known as Roderich's lap). I looked up and, through my blurry, tear-filled eyes, I saw my father with a twisted expression of rage and fury upon his face. I gasped in surprise, my tears drying up in fear. I glanced over at Roderich to see he was now also standing, most obviously on his guard.

"Elizabeta," my father growled. "How dare you." I missed the action, but I could most definitely feel the burn and the blood rising to where he had just smacked my on my cheek.

"Sir," Roderich exclaimed, the disgust marring his beautiful face.

My father turned to him with wrath-filled eyes. "You stay out of this, boy," he hissed. "May God curse you with damnation for disgracing my family. And you, Elizabeta -" -his gaze was directed back towards me- "- I will teach you a lesson." He pulled on my arm and a sharp pain came from my shoulder as he started to drag me away from my love.

I looked back at my love. "Roderich," I called.

His expression was crestfallen as he pathetically whimpered back my name; he could do nothing. He was unable to.

If only we had a second more; maybe then my heart wouldn't have been broken as painfully as it did.

My father dragged me past the castle I called home, ordering a servant to retrieve my hand-maid Bella on the way. She joined us halfway into the fields behind my home. It was her face that told me I was hopelessly doomed.

There was a tower four fields and a forest away from the center of the kingdom. It stood there and had no use other than keeping the memory of what had been part of a grand castle many, many years before. This is where my father brought me. He pushed me and Bella inside. "Girl," he started, "You will not be my daughter for seven years. This is where you will reside in the meantime; I will have food and water sent here, enough for seven years. Be thankful that I am allowing you to have this hand-maiden for company in your banishment. Perhaps, by the time the seven years are up, you will leave your idiotic 'feelings' of love for that prince in the past. I will not tolerate this behavior." With that, he left, locking the door behind him.

It took a few hours to transfer the seven years' worth of food and water into my new home. When they left, they put mortar over the door, effectively sealing us in.

"I'm sorry, Bella," I said. "You shouldn't have been dragged into this. We'll find a way out somehow."

Bella gave me a kind smile. "Do not fret, my princess. I'll remain forever loyal to you."

Seven years. Seven years until I could see my love again. Oh, Roderich, my love, when I see you again I shall be a full grown lady of twenty-three, and you a man of twenty-five, surely married with at least one child by then. Oh, my love.


Five-eighths of the food would spoil within a year. Three more eighths would spoil within a year and a half. That gave us so little time to escape.

One month into our imprisonment, Bella and I heard strange noises coming from outside. Six months later, they stopped and it was relatively quiet. During those eight months, we had been picking away at the mortar on the door with a knife. I prayed every month that we would be done within the next eight months and be able to escape.

May prayers came through.

Fifteen months of imprisonment. Fifteen. It was a wonder on how we made it through. Surely we could have died if we hadn't worked so vigilantly! Our skin was pale, our eyes unused to such bright light. Nevertheless, Bella and I climbed out of the hole we had made and embraced the outside.

But the outside was not the outside we had been expecting.

Sure, the Sun shined, the grass was green, and bugs flew about. However, there were massive craters littering the ground. Bodies upon bodies of decaying corpses were not too far off from them. Barracks and forts were scattered across the once tranquil and marvelous field. The strange noises we had heard were the sounds of war. And yet, why had no one come to collect their loved one's body? Why were they still here, smelling up the should-be-clean-and-fresh air? Where were the farmers that had tended this field? The war was over, they could have come back. Bella and I looked at each other.

Off we went to the center of the kingdom. If anyone was here in this wasteland, they would be at the castle. To our great disappointment, not a single soul was there. The castle lay in ruins. It must have been pillaged for there was nothing shiny amongst the debris. And all about were more and more corpses.

I bit my lip and my breath became uneven. It was awful. How could the world be so cruel? What had happened? Why had war befallen my kingdom?

"My princess," Bella questioned, voice quivering. "What shall we do now?"

A sob ripped up through my throat. I looked around at the decay and destruction. I couldn't understand. Why would this happen? And then a thought struck me. "It's all my fault."

Bella was quick to react and deny my faults. "No, no, my prin-"

"It's all my fault," I interrupted. Because it was, wasn't it? It was probably because I hadn't married that dumb prince two kingdoms over. My whole kingdom paid the price due to my own carelessness. If only I had left my love a few seconds earlier, if only I had never met Roderich at all!

I instantly retracted that though. Roderich was the best thing that had ever happened to me. I could never regret any second I spent with him. I turned to Bella. "We'll leave this place and go to the next kingdom over. We can set up life there."

"Starting from scratch," Bella timidly asked me.

I nodded my head grimly. "From scratch."

It took the rest of the day to make it to the next kingdom. We moved slowly through it as to not attract attention. We walked all the way to the castle – Roderich's castle. Was he married already? Did he have a wife with child? Did he already have a child?

We knocked on the servant's entrance. A young maid opened. "Yes," she said.

"We are looking for work," Bella said confidently. "Do you have any positions open?"

The girl took in a breath to answer, but only closed her mouth and let us in to which we were thankful. It was cold outside. The inside was cozy for a servants place – it was the kitchen area so it was really warm. The girl turned to look back at them. "We have two openings for women," she said. "We need a window washer and someone to bring the Crown Prince's fiancée her meals and keep her company. She refuses to leave her room."

Crown Prince? That was Roderich. My heart swelled with sorrow – he was getting married. Married. And he wasn't getting married to me.

"I'll be the window washer," Bella offered. I don't think Bella realized that this was Roderich's kingdom. She didn't realize what pain this would bring me.

The girl nodded. "You two will start in the morning. Follow me; I shall show you to your rooms." We said thank you and gladly accepted our new homes.

In the morning, I took Roderich's fiancée her breakfast. On the way out of the kitchen, I learned they were to be wed tomorrow. She had arrived around the same time we escaped. I knocked on her door and the person within slowly opened it; keeping their face from view, a small, delicate hand reached out and dragged me in.

Inside, I was met by the face of a pretty young girl. She had short blonde hair with a pretty purple ribbon in it, her dress was purple and finally made with ruffles galore, her eyes were a vivid sea foam green that shone as if the Sun was always on them. She was cute, beautiful, and I envied her so much. She was going to marry my love. And yet, she was young. It surprised me. Surely she's older than she looks?

"Your breakfast, Your Majesty," I said, placing the tray of food on a table nearby.

"Thank you," she replied in a quiet voice. She seemed shy. "What is your name?"

How kind. But I felt the need to not give her my full name. "Eliza. And yours?"

She smiled prettily. "Erika. I'm the princess from the land across the sea." Erika sat down on a chair by the table and placed the napkin from the tray onto her lap. "It's very pretty there, Eliza. I miss it." I'd imagine so. Foreign lands always were. She looked up at me and motioned for me to sit in the chair across from hers. "Go on, sit." I did as told, mumbling a thank you. She was quiet for a while as she ate. Suddenly, though, she put down her utensils and looked me dead in the eye. "Eliza, in your honest opinion, what do you think Prince Roderich will think of me?"

I blinked and almost relished in her nervousness. I had to be nice. So I told her the truth. "Prince Roderich is a very kind man. However, if he has an opinion, he won't be afraid to voice it. But don't worry, my princess, he'll only have nice things to say about you. You're sweet and cute – don't worry a bit." I smiled at her to emphasize my point.

Erika frowned despite my reassurances. "But he's older than me. I'm scared."

This spiked my interest. I knew she was younger than me, but how much younger? "Your Highness, if you don't mind me asking, but how old are you?"

She looked down at her plate of food, her hands folded into her pocket. "I'm not quite fifteen yet," she admitted timidly. "He is turning twenty this year, will he not? A five year age gap. Five years, Eliza, do you understand?" Her lip quivered. "I'm scared."

I drew in a breath. Barely fifteen? And her parents were marrying her off to a man five years her elder? Sure, marrying someone five years older or younger than you was not uncommon, but hardly fifteen? I would have been terrified, too, if my parents made me do it! The prince I was supposed to marry was three years my elder and that wasn't too bad, considering I was sixteen. Erika wasn't even fully developed. She still had a little baby fat, her chest was nearly flat, and she was borderline looking like a child! And she was to be married?

I reached out to touch her shoulder hesitantly. "You'll be okay. I know you will; you have to. Everything will be fine, okay, my princess?" Erika looked up at me with big sea foam green eyes filled with tears and my heart broke even more. "Maybe I can go, too. I'll be on the sidelines, giving you silent moral support." She only nodded her head.

I stayed with her until a little after she finished her meal. She had said she wanted to be alone, and I completely understood. I told her I'd be back later with her lunch.


The next morning, the day of my loves wedding to a sweet, innocent girl, I went and took said girl's breakfast to her room. "Good morning, Princess Erika," I greeted as she let me into her room. Her eyes were no longer puffy and rimmed red. "How was your night?"

Instead of answering my question, she looked in my eyes and said, "Eliza, you go and marry Prince Roderich on my behalf."

I blinked. I had not been expecting that. Had Erika gone mad between dinner and breakfast? "Um, excuse me," I asked, setting the tray on the table.

"Please," she tried. "I don't want him to see me. He won't like me, I just know it! Nobody here has seen me, so it will work. You can be Princess Erika and I can be the Maid Eliza. Please, Eliza, please!" Erika had taken her hands into mine, a puppy-dog pout on her face.

I took my hands from hers. "I cannot do that, Your Excellence! That's a form of treason! We could be put in jail!" I had a horrified look upon my face. She had to be crazy.

Erika turned away and sighed. She was silent for a few moments before turning back with an excited look on her face. "You could just go and get married to him, then! Don't take off the veil and give me a few more hours to prepare myself. I'm begging you." Another pleading look.

I was crushed and torn. Finally, I gave a heavy sigh. "I'll only get married to him. I won't take your identity. Afterwards, he's all yours and you are all his. Understand?"

Erika looked like she was on cloud nine. "Oh, yes, Eliza, yes! I completely understand! Thank you! When I have some power here, you are definitely getting a pay raise, I promise." I gave her a solemn smile and she smiled animatedly back. "Come, share my breakfast with me; I'm so nervous I'm afraid I'll only eat half!" I was nervous, too, and I had already eaten breakfast, but for her sake I ate more.

Afterwards, I tried to fit into her dress. That did not work so well; she was smaller than me, after all. We were just about to give up when I remembered something Roderich had told me a time ago. "There's a wedding dress," I told Erika, "in the West Tower. It was Prince Roderich's great-great-grandmother's. She was my age when she got married; it should probably fit. And we can make it look newer by taking this sash off your dress and putting it on the other."

Erika nodded her head. "Thanks, Eliza."

I tried to calm my nerves. When she came back, I put on the old dress and it fit like a glove, thankfully. We tied the sash around my waste and did my hair up and put some makeup on me and finally the veil was placed just so it would cover my face without a trace of skin underneath. Makeup was practically unneeded, but it made Erika feel better. Ten minutes later, someone came to collect "Princess Erika." Off I went, giving a small wave to Erika in good-bye. She still looked nervous.

With every step I took towards the church in which "Erika" would be wed to Roderich, I prayed and prayed and prayed I wouldn't be found out. No matter how much I wanted Roderich for myself, I knew I couldn't have him. I never could have; not before, not now, not ever. He was Erika's. To him, I was probably dead. Elizabeta was now a name for his past. And that depressed me. A lot.

All too soon, I was at the doors of the church. Inside I was walked down the aisle. Down the aisle to Roderich like I had always wanted. I only wished I could have been myself and not some other girl. He looked up at his bride and gave her a smile. The smile didn't reach his eyes and I was instantly very happy it wasn't Erika doing this; she would have noticed, too, and that would have broken her heart even more than it is mine. But he did look rather dashing; he was gorgeous and I really missed being in his arms. I had already come to terms that I would never be in his arms a year ago.

The wedding was a blur to me and I tried to say as little as possible. I thanked the Lord when I only had to sign Princess Erika Vogel of Liechtenstein on a form (and watch him sign Prince Roderich Edelstein of Austria) rather than kiss him. Not that I would have minded kissing my love, but that would have given away the whole thing. However, when we were under the arch of the door, Roderich turned to me. "Princess Erika," he started, "Please accept this gift." He wrapped a chain with an Edelweiss flower pendant around my neck. I stared at it, sitting so innocently on my collarbone, so beautiful.

"Thank you," I said quietly.

My love smiled kindly at me, a smile that did reach his eyes. I realized he was just as scared as Erika was. "You're welcome. I shall see you back to your room; my parents have requested we consummate this marriage by the end of the week. Whenever you are ready, come to my chambers. I am in no rush and I will treat you like delicate Edelweiss." I nodded, blushing a bit underneath the veil. I committed the information to memory so I could tell Erika later. Roderich was just as kind and as straight to the point as I remembered.

He walked me back to Erika's room and we said good night. When I stepped in, Erika waited until his steps faded into nonexistence before bombarding me with questions. I answered them all while undressing. But when I got to the necklace, I had trouble parting ways with it. "What is that," she asked, taking notice to it.

"The necklace Prince Roderich gave his bride," I answered, fiddling with the pendant. Edelweiss had been his and mine favorite flower.

Erika leaned in to see it, then looked at me and smiled. "You may keep it."

I blinked in surprise. "But, my princess! It is rightfully yours!" I took it off, regretfully, to show my point.

She shook her head. "No, Eliza, I'm serious. Keep it as a memoir." She took it from my hands and clasped it onto my neck once more.

I smiled at her, a tear coming from my eye. "Thank you, thank you very much." I wiped away the tear and the information I needed to tell her came back to mind. "Oh! I almost forgot!" I told her what had been said to me.

Again, Erika looked scared. "He sounds very nice, but…."

"You have a week," I said. "And you can go of your own accord. I'd do it when my nerves are at an all-time low."

She nodded. "Okay. But I'm still scared."

"I know."


On the seventh day after the wedding, Erika had still not gone to consummate her marriage. I was still bringing her meals three times a day and keeping her company. She was very frightened and anxious; I felt so bad for her.

It was during my afternoon visit that I told her it had to be done that night. "No," she protested. "I'm not ready yet!"

I sighed sorrowfully. "I know, my princess," I said, "but you can't leave him hanging. He's your husband now; you need to get this over with. You will be procreating with him someday – maybe soon, maybe later, but the point is, you have to!" She proceeded to make me feel horrid about saying such things when she started to cry. "N-No, Your Greatness, don't cry!" I started to desperately wiping away her tears and of course that's when there's a knock at the door. Who could be knocking?

They, whoever it was, hadn't waited for one of us to answer; they just stepped right in. We looked up to see Roderich, who wasn't particularly looking at us; rather, he looked like he didn't want to be here at all. "Princess Erika, I have come on the behalf of my parents who-" He cut off when he saw us, er, me wiping Erika's tears away (who had now started helping me, seeing as her husband had walked in on such a disgraceful moment).

My love continued to stare at us. I couldn't figure out why until it hit me. He had married someone of my stature, not the cutie in the regal gowns. He had married someone like me, in the rags. He was putting it together. Princess Erika had not signed her name on the marriage form, someone else had. Princess Erika was young; the person who was married to him was older. The person he had married was given a necklace with an Edelweiss pendant on it. And the person wearing the pendant? Well, she was wearing rags, trying to calm down the girl who should have been walking down the aisle to him a week ago. Erika was figuring out this, too.

Roderich looked at us both sternly. "Who had I married last week?"

We looked at each other and for a second, I had the feeling I was the one that was going to have to explain. I was shocked when Erika did, though. "My prince," she started, "I am Princess Erika Vogel. Last week, I had my maid walk down the aisle for me. I was scared and nervous and felt like you would not accept me. We have committed treason together and we will take the punishment. I am sorry." He had been looking at her the whole time, then he turned his gaze onto me.

"And who are you, maid," he asked coldly.

I took in a shuddering breath. "My name is Eliza." I prayed he wouldn't ask for my full name. That would most definitely ruin everything.

"Your full name, please."

My heart was pounding, my palms sweaty. Damn it. I guess I had stayed quiet longer than I had though because he repeated his question more forcefully. "E-Elizabeta Héderváry," I stammered.

And the look he gave me. It was like I had become the Devil itself. Like I had come from Hell and was here to torment him until he finally gave up on life. He glared at me with such distrust and animosity I felt as if I couldn't breathe. "Your real name, you damn wench," he hissed.

I flinched. Erika did, too. Out of the corner of my eye, I could tell she was curious on why he didn't believe me. I bit my lip and decided to ignore his demand. "Why would I lie?"

"Don't take a dead person's identity," my love countered.

That hurt. He really, truly believed I had died? The pain on my face showed, apparently, because his scowl got more defined. "But, but I'm not dead. And my name is Elizabeta Héderváry! The princess of Hungary. Believe me! Why would I lie to you? You, the man who said he loved me more than the Sun loves to burn?" Angry tears filled my eyes. "You, who wanted to marry me because I was the love of your life! You, who wanted nothing more to hold me in your arms for all eternity! No! You leave me for dead because my father locked me up into a tower and got his kingdom into a suicidal war all because I wanted to marry you, too!" Tears streamed down my face and I furiously scrubbed them away. "Roddy, why," I asked him.

It was silent for a long while. I still continued to brush away my tears, but somewhere between the end of my explosion and now, Erika had come and put her arms around my shoulders for comfort. She really was a sweet girl, not even questioning me about anything. Did she not care? She had to, but at least she wasn't voicing her curiosity.

My love broke the silence after what felt like a few hours. "Liz," he whispered, unbelieving. "Elizabeta?"

I looked into his wide, violet eyes. "Roderich, my love."

And suddenly the world felt right and at peace once he pulled me into his arms. "Elizabeta," he whispered softly into my hair.

"Roderich," I breathed back. "I never stopped loving you."

He squeezed me tighter. "Nor did I. I love you so much; I love you more than the Moon loves to reflect the Sun's light." I smiled. Everything was going to be all right.

"I'm happy for you two," came Erika's voice from behind. I almost jumped. I had forgotten she was here. I turned around in my love's arms to grin at her. She grinned back, but then addressed my love. "Prince Roderich, if it isn't too much trouble, may I request a marriage cancellation?"

Roderich went to squeeze her shoulder and beamed at her. "Of course, my princess. I'll send for a servant to do so right away." He left the room after kissing me and Erika on our cheeks. I couldn't wait to tell Bella the news!

"Thank you, my princess," I said to Erika, giving her a hug which she reciprocated.

"No," Erika denied, "Thank you."