The X-Files - The lost episodes of Season 10
HUNGER PAINS
( MSR (Shipper), Romance, Action, Horror, Angst )
Chapter One
Mulder looked up at the rain. It poured down over his face and hid his tears. They were flowing freely, coming from a depth so deep in his heart he couldn't hold it in much longer. Scully was inside the motel, she was sleeping. He looked over briefly to her room, it was lit up with a soft glow of a bedside light. He had gone in to check on her, he wanted to confide in her. But she had been sleeping soundly and he hadn't wanted to wake her.
He signed deeply and closed his eyes. His mind was racing, his heart was breaking in two once more. He was grateful of course, grateful that they were back together, working The X-Files. But he was also so sad, it was bringing back so many painful memories and he still loved her, god he still loved her so much. It hurt just to look at her sometimes, to know deep down that she was still reeling from the break up as well. But here they were, working together again like old times.
He took a deep breath and tried to get himself together. If she had seen him in this state she would have been so worried about him. He was grateful that she hadn't been awake now, but then he was also a little but gutted inside that she hadn't been awake, because may be he would have been brave enough then to tell her how he felt. He had tried, on their first proper case a few weeks back, 'You've never just been anything to me, Scully..' he had said to her, and she had brushed it off, tearing his heart into pieces again, knowing that she still loved him, or at least he wanted to think that she did, but that she was going to ignore any advances because the break-up had been so painful, so raw.
He brushed the tears off his cheeks and turned back to the Motel. Her light was still on, she had left it on and fell asleep without realizing. He wanted so badly to go into her room, turn off her light and scoop her up in his arms. But he knew that he couldn't.. or could he?
He seriously considered it for a moment, and started to walk towards the door. The rain was easing, he was feeling more confident. He took a few more steps onto the walkway in front of her door. Then he froze.
'No' he said to himself. 'Leave her be.'
Mulder and Scully's Cabin – 16 months ago
'Mulder are you going to get up today or what?' Scully proclaimed, standing by the bed, a hot mug of coffee in her right hand, her briefcase in the other. She was dressed, ready for work. Her shirt and loose fitting over jacket looked like it needed an iron. 'You were supposed to iron my jacket last night, I got in late..' She said, exasperated. She looked down at the creases and sighed. 'FOX!' She exclaimed loudly. He jumped at the sound of her voice and rolled over in the bed to face her, his face drawn and tired. Scully's heart dropped. He looked terrible. She gasped and put down the coffee cup on the bedside table then flung herself towards him.
'Mulder! You look…' She tried to find the words, 'So tired.' She said with hot tears stinging her eyes. He was getting worse, much worse than he had been.
'Thanks.' He said, in a lightly sarcastic manner. Scully put a hand on his covered body and then to his face, she ran a hand over his bearded cheek in concern.
'Have you..' She started, she knew this was a difficult subject, a start to their arguments normally, 'Have you taken your…'
'Meds?' Mulder said loudly. He was shouting. Scully flinched and moved her hand back. 'Yes Dana! I have taken my meds. But guess what, they are not magic pills, they don't work overnight, You should know that more than anyone!'
'OK! OK!' Scully said in a fluster, and moved back from the bed. She felt tears threatening to fall. He was getting worse, and she was trying to help, but trying to help someone you love who is mentally depressed was the hardest thing in the world. She knew what was wrong with him of course, as a medical doctor, but she had never experienced the emotional side of it before. It was so hard.
There was an awkward silence for a moment between them. She looked down at the coffee cup, still steaming. She didn't want it now. Her stomach turned at the thought of it.
'Scully.. Scully I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.' Mulder said sadly with a sigh, and forced himself into a upright position in bed and raised his hands to his face in shame. 'I just.. just don't feel great today.' He lowered his hands slowly. Scully looked at him with concern. She held her grip more on her briefcase. She wanted to hold him, but she knew that if she did that he wouldn't let her go this morning, and she needed to get to work.
'It's ok. I know.' She said softly. Mulder raised his eyes to her. They were so dark and sad. She shook her head.
'Try and do something with your day. It will make you feel better.' She said. Mulder raised an eyebrow.
'What? What can I do Dana?' He said, exasperated. She shrugged.
'I dunno.. may be some gardening?' She said with a small smile, not sure how he would take the comment. Luckily, it seemed to cheer him up.
'Gardening?' Mulder said with a smile, he looked at her and laughed. 'Really? I would never have thought of that. You know I am not a great gardener Scully..' He said. Scully let out a small laugh as she imagined him pottering around the garden.
She leant down, put her right hand on the bed and leaned towards him for a good bye kiss. He met her gaze and moved towards her, lifting his left hand to her cheek and pulling her in. He seemed to light up at the touch of her lips and he pulled her into him hungrily. She lost her balance as he pulled her further towards the bed and his body, then suddenly she was lying down on the bed, Mulder over her kissing her passionately. He moved his hands to her shirt under the jacket and fumbled at the buttons. Scully felt him do this and raised a hand to his. Although she would have loved to stay, she needed to get to work. And she was late.
'Mulder…' She muttered as she managed to break away from the kiss. He moaned and wanted more. She pushed his hand away and managed to struggle away from under him. 'Mulder.. Mulder no.. I have to go to work.' She gasped, and finally got upright. Mulder reached out for her longingly and gave her a small smile.
'Ok… I'll miss you..' He said as she straightened up her shirt and jacket. 'Oh crap, I forgot to iron that didn't I.' He said with an apologetic face.
'That's ok.' She said, with a smile that left him longing for her. She turned on her heels and walked out of the bedroom, Mulder watching her leave. He sighed heavily, he missed her deeply as he heard the familiar sounds of her keys locking the front door, and then he heard the soft rumble of her engine and finally her tyres rolling across the grass.
Then he was alone.
'Agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully, FBI.' He said as the raised their badges to the Sheriff. He scanned their badges briefly and then raised a hand for him to put them down. They obliged.
The crime scene was busy. Scully's heels dipped into the ground and she pulled them out with each step in annoyance. She should have thought this through more, they weren't thin heels but the rain the night before had made the ground so muddy. She should have worn her boots today.
'So Mulder, there's no trace of a body. But there are these blood trails from the scene into these bushes.' She said pointing out the direction that she suspected the killed dragged his victim. 'Are you still presuming that the victim was…'
'Eaten?' Mulder finished for her. Scully grimaced. 'Absolutely Scully. No doubt in my mind.'
Scully raised her eyebrows at the grotesque thought. There was not enough evidence to support this theory in her eyes.
'Mulder if the victim had been eaten here by someone or some thing, there would surely be more blood or more traces of tissue, but there is no evidence of this just the small blood trail.'
'I know Scully, but I believe this someone has either eaten the body in its entirety or it has taken the body somewhere else, may be up in the trees.' He said, pointing to the old trees above them. Scully looked up and tried to imagine this.
'That is like an animal Mulder, you think this is a human?' She said.
'We've seen crazier things right?' He said with a small grin. Scully nodded.
'Yes we have.'
'So where were you last night?' She said. Mulder was driving. He gave her a small glance as he remembered his actions the night before in the rain. He wondered what she was getting at.
'What do you mean? I was in my room.' He said, his heart quickening slightly. Had she seen him?
'No, after that. I was watching the news and..' She said slowly, she felt her cheeks blush slightly. 'I fell asleep didn't I.'
'Yes Scully, you fell asleep while watching the news. You were exhausted.' He said gently and turned back to the road.
'You.. you checked on me?' She said, her heart rising in her chest slightly. She felt hopeful, maybe he had come into her room and laid with her while she had been asleep, maybe he still loved her. May be. She missed him. She missed him even while being with him because it wasn't the same. Her heart was still aching from the pain of their dreadful breakup. It had been so difficult with him being depressed and her working so hard. It had been so hard to keep it together, and they had really tried. They really had worked so hard at trying to be together and happy. But it had just fallen apart. And now here she was, she was back with Mulder working together like they used to and it was wonderful as she had never felt more alive, however every time she looked at him she just wanted to hold him, kiss him and tell him that she still loved him.
'I did.' He said softly. His heart started to race. Had she wanted me to?
'Oh. Ok.' She said taking a deep breath. 'Thanks.'
Scully looked over at his handsome face and smiled at him a little. He smiled back and she sensed that he was happy at her comment. Slowly, without thinking, she saw him reach over and take her left hand. She lost her breath for a second in shock, but she didn't pull away. He was determined, she could see that. He didn't care what she said or did, he wanted to touch her. Scully felt his warm, familiar touch as he put his hand over hers and she welcomed it, and held his back.
Mulder shyly looked over at her and gave her a loving smile. Scully felt her heart nearly burst and she smiled back, and tightened her grip on his hand.
'So this was how it is going to be.' Scully thought to herself. 'We still love each other, but we are too scared to admit it as we don't want to hurt each other again.'
They stayed like that until they reached their next destination.
Thanks for reading! More coming very soon! I am so happy I am writing again, the new mini series has inspired me all over again.
