Disclaimer: Whatever OCs appear are mine and the plot, but nothing else, so you can't sue me!

This is the first collab fic I've posted, with my best buddy friend N8theGr8! Say hello to my readers!

N8: Oh crap, you're actually posting this?! Help! I'm trapped in Itachiforever342's basement!

Me: Don't listen to him! He's crazy!

N8: If I say hello, can I get some food?

Me: You already said hello, so I don't have to feed you!

N8: *whimpers*

Me: Hush you!

This is a crossover fic, and since there is no options on the site for this crossover, it's .hack/G.U. and Escaflowne!

Here we go! I hope everyone enjoys this!


Game or Not?

The familiar hum of her VR setup was music to her ears. A two hour meeting in the morning set the tone for a perfectly unproductive day. She knew there was only one cure: logging on to "The World". Seconds later the short cat girl player character looked around the Sigma Server's root town Breg Epona. Dozens of other players shopped, formed parties, or stood around chatting. The mass of voices made all but the nearest conversations unintelligible.

"… just got this from that raid last night."

"Dude, have you been to…"

"Terror of Death? I fought 'im once…"

"…never seen anything like it."

"They need to bring back Monsieur…"

"How I mine for fish?"

"Who'd win? ToD or Tri Edge?"

The chats about the Terror of Death are still all the rage. Every Player Killer, is asked about a "Tri Edge". If they don't know anything, they get PKed. The Terror of Death is something of a hero to the n00bs because he's a Player Killer Killer. There are so many rumors that I don't know what to believe anymore.

"Are you Kari396?" a random PC asked.

The cat girl/Adept Rogue nodded. "Yeah, what about it?"

"You went through the Forest of Pain, right? And you survived?"

"Yeah, what about it? I quit once I got to the end. Decided that it wasn't my thing. I prefer normal areas, anyway."

"Could you please, please, please join my guild? Here, I even have a guest card."

What is with everyone and joining a guild? I don't need anyone to help me level up, I know all the "Repth" spells that I get from leveling up, which I don't particularly need. Kari, or Kari396 as her screen name said, pushed the card away. "No thanks."

"But why?! You could at least protect our group as we level up! It isn't safe with all the PKers and the Terror of Death roaming around! You're only a few levels shy of him, too!"

Kari shook her head. "No thanks, I don't ever want to go against him. I might be level one-thirty, but that doesn't mean that I'm even slightly on par with him. First of all, he uses three types of weapons. I only use one. Second, he doesn't care who gets in his way, if they're useless, he PKs them. I actually don't fight other PCs, even if I wanted to, because I'm not as cruel as to PK someone. And third, the guy's a couple sandwiches short of a picnic. I, on the other hand, am quite down to Earth and don't want to get PKed by the infamous Haseo. Anything else you'd like to say?"

The PC huffed and accused, "You're just afraid of him."

The blue-haired cat girl snorted. "Of course I am! And for good reason, too! I heard he PKed one hundred PKers at once without breaking a sweat! Why wouldn't I have a generous amount of fear for him?! Don't say that you're not dead scared of him, even though you're bad-mouthing me!"

The other character quivered and then ran away, calling, "I'm sorry I bothered you!"

A sigh escaped her lips at that. Geez. Really, what is with everyone and joining a guild? True, there is strength in numbers, but the Terror of Death seems to be pretty strong on his own. Even though I am almost at his level and I nearly completed the Forest of Pain, that doesn't mean that I can take him. Even I know that, and I've never faced him, or even seen him, besides in the pictures people put on the forum.

Looking at the list of items she had in stock, she knew that she was ready for another round of leveling up. Some people called her a "level grinder" because she was always leveling up before going against a boss, making sure she was more powerful than it was. I get all these rare items too, most of which I alchemize or sell, mostly sell. I go almost everywhere to get powerful. But even if I go to certain places, there are some items that can only be gotten if I participate in special events. The only one I've ever done is the Forest of Pain, and I didn't see the point in it, besides that there were really strong monsters for a hundred levels. I never did find the point as to what all that was for. Even though the Terror of Death did get the way he is now because he completed that event.

Shaking her head, she headed for the warp point. She had the best weapons, armor and accessories she could find, so it wouldn't be too easy for anyone to PK her. And for good reason, too. That's why I leveled up so much.

She actually held some pretty strong armor and accessories that she couldn't even equip yet, that she'd found in some areas. Most other players would be scared of going to the places she went to, because she actually went to places that were five levels higher than she was so she could level up faster.

Arriving at the warp gate, she looked at the list of places she could go to. Hmmm, let's see... Oh! Look at this one! I've never seen something like this before. Intriguing Mysterious Gaea...it sounds interesting. But it's a level one-forty...I'm not nearly high enough in level to go there without getting killed. Even six levels higher would really hurt. But ten...I don't have nearly enough healing items to keep my HP up from even glancing hits. Although...it might not be here when I get to one thirty-five. So, let's go!


When the warp was complete, she found herself in an area she'd never even seen before. When she looked around, she couldn't find anything like the other areas. No monsters, no treasure chests, no Lucky or Unlucky Animals, no Chim to kick, nothing. "There's not even a return warp gate. How do I go back to town if there aren't any warp gates? Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all."

Stretching, she reached behind her for her weapons and blinked when she felt the Twin Blades in sheaths starting at her hips to below the base of her tail. Drawing them, she saw they looked the same, but felt heavier. "They feel like my daggers in the real world. Must be a new patch."

Sheathing her Twin Blades, she started walking, heading for the wooded area. "Maybe I'll be able to find something in there. I just hope it isn't a monster that's higher in level than I am." When she thought about what she'd just said, she almost hit herself. "Idiot, of course all the monsters are gonna be higher in level than I am. It's a one-forty area, after all, if that's what it is."

Suddenly, she heard something behind her. Stiffening, she turned around. A huge dragon stood behind her, yellow eyes considering her. She drew her weapons, and it roared, before charging at her. Kari leaped, slashing at its back, only to find that her blades bounced off its tough hide. "No effect?! Is it a boss?"

In a surprising display of intelligence, the beast shifted its weight to its left foot and pivoted, slamming its heavily muscled tail into the girl's unarmored midsection. The impact lifted her feet off the ground, throwing her against the trunk of a tree. She felt two ribs shatter under the blow, and the tree added a third. Choking, she felt something warm dribbling down her chin, giving her mouth a copper taste. Wiping her face, she found it was blood.

Why am I bleeding?! There's no blood in The World! It hurts to breathe...that's not right, either. What's going on here?

The dragon locked its gaze on her. A fleshy pink tongue swiped over its scaly lips and it came forward, eager to have its meal.

In a last desperate act of defiance, her left hand whipped around, opening a wide gash on the creature's tongue with her dagger. The dragon recoiled from the sting, thrashing its head left and right and spraying turquoise blood. It drew its head back, two sacs on its chest glowing bright red as it sucked in air. A burst of flames spewed from the dragon's jaws.

A split second before Kari was incinerated, she heard an unfamiliar voice whoop, "BOOYAH!" and the fire halted. All she could see was an unkempt head of hair, bright orange.

Orange? Who in The World has orange hair?

It was as if she blinked and the dragon was lying on the ground, dead. Her savior placed his spear on the ground next to him, drawing a knife, almost a short sword, out of his belt, thrusting it into the soft underbelly. A disturbing squish followed, as he cut another gash perpendicular to the first.

I'd barf if my chest didn't hurt so bad. I thought it would disappear. That's what usually happens to monsters.

As the man reached in and tore a round pink gem out of the dragon's heart, Kari thought, Chest pain or not, I can't take it anymore, and she lost it.

"I track you for three days, and I fight you for just a little bit and you retreat! But you shoulda known better than to try and get away from me! I wonder how you cook dragon meat."

It might be a good sell item, but why would he try to cook it? And why didn't the EXP show up above his head? Maybe I wasn't conscious for that.

He turned around, narrowed eyes accusing the injured girl. "As for you, don't ever try to steal my kill again." His eyes widened in alarm. "By the Mystic Moon, you're a mess... What were you thinking, taking on dragon with only those two puny knives?"

"w0t j00 s4y?" she gasped. "D33z r ubr r4r3 t\/\/il\l b1adz."

"I can't understand you. What are you trying to say?"

"r j00 n00b? u h4\/z teh l337 n1nj4 sl1llz."

"I've been all over Gaea and I have never heard anybody talk like that. Where are you from?"

"25/f/jpn. u?"

"Huh?"

"a/s/l! j00 r t07l n00b!"

"I'd better take a closer look at you. Dragons aren't known for being gentle." He laid her gently on her back and opened up his medicine pouch. "You've got a couple of nasty gashes, but they're not life-threatening. The bigger problem is your ribs. If they're shattered like I think they are, you could be bleeding internally."

Kari felt a brief sting as a liquid poured over her wounds. Several small pricks followed, and a slight pulling sensation, as the needle and thread closed her lacerations. Why doesn't he just use a...healing item? Her mind was muddled from blood loss. Is he a...foreigner? Is that...why he doesn't understand?

"Now that that's taken care of, I'm going to have to take a closer look at your chest." He pulled the center zipper of her top, laying it out to either side.

This...isn't right... What's...he doing...?

His hands began feeling along her ribcage methodically. As they rose higher and higher, Kari heard alarm klaxons wailing in her head. In a moment of clarity she gripped the blade in her left hand and swung wildly. The spearman couldn't evade the strike completely and suffered a scratch on his right bicep.

"WTF r u d0in? th1s i5n'7 a pr0n gam3!"

"You're insane! I'm trying to save your life, and you act like I'm some pervert! You shouldn't move around, you could kill yourself."

Kari realized her mistake when a fresh wave of agony flared up in her chest.

"You've had your bottom three ribs on each side shattered. Since you've coughed up that much blood, I'm guessing that you've got some internal hemorrhaging. I may not look like it, but I've got some healer's training. I can't risk moving you without checking your insides," he tried to sound calm as he unrolled a surgical kit. He took a piece of leather, wrapped it around a stick, and placed it between the cat girl's teeth. "I'm sorry I don't have anesthetic, bite down hard."

What's he gonna do?

The sunlight glinted off of a scalpel and seconds later Kari felt a slash along her breastbone and all she could focus on was biting the leather as if she could make the pain go away by biting through it. As soon as the incision was opened fully, the impromptu surgeon gasped. Most of the bone fragments had stayed in place, but three were driven into her liver, as well as one in the right lung. He reached inside with his forceps and removed the shard from her lung first. Kari coughed up more blood, but her breathing was slightly easier. The other pieces came out just as smoothly, and soon Kari once again felt the poke-and-tug of the needle.

If this is normal game play, then I'm canceling my subscription. This is way more than I can handle.

Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as she passed out, and the three pieces of the leather-bound stick dropped out of her mouth.


Anybody confused yet? Anything you want to know, just ask! I can explain things as well as I can!

For now, we will part and see you next time! *nudges N8*

N8: Send help...

Please review!