A/N: This fic follows canon up until the end of On My Way, and from there it spins off into my somewhat-headcanon after the events of Quinn's crash. This was prompted by someone on Tumblr recently posting about "what if Cooper had been the driver of the truck that hit Quinn." This fic quickly followed.
I went with an M rating due to pretty much the whole thing being based around the car crash; it gets into detail and I know that's triggering to a lot of people, so you have been warned.
Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy!
It's five minutes after Rachel Berry was supposed to walk down the aisle to meet Finn Hudson.
Kurt is sitting on the armrest of Blaine's chair, twisting the pink bouquet in his hands and wondering how the hell he'd been talked into being a bridesmaid, and Rachel is pacing the floor, clutching her iPhone in her hand, her last, unanswered text to Quinn still lighting the screen.
"Look, Rachel, I know you want Quinn's blessing and all, and I understand, considering all the weird, gooey, BFF eyes you two have been making at each-other lately, but if you want to get this show on the road, I suggest you do it quickly," Santana pipes up, delicately recrossing her legs and shooting Rachel the bitchface only one Santana Lopez could have perfected. Kurt smirks slightly, because, really, the ongoing drama spiraling between Rachel and Quinn has reached a climax of absolute insanity.
Rachel whirls angrily to face Santana, and Kurt can sense a Rachel-Berry-drama-queen-meltdown-extravaganza building like a tidal wave, so quickly intervenes.
"Rachel, if you're dead set on tying the knot with Finn, you better get in there and do it, Quinn or no Quinn." Kurt can't believe he's actually saying this, because this façade of Rachel and Finn playing grownup has left a sour taste in his mouth, especially when Blaine is sitting quietly at Kurt's elbow, all dressed up in a dashing suit and bowtie, and Kurt can easily imagine that the wedding march humming in the background could be in time to his father leading Blaine down the aisle to meet him – but Kurt knows such daydreams are irrational and should be squashed immediately. No one in this uptight, prejudiced town would marry him and Blaine, and anyway, as Kurt had been trying to cram into Rachel's impossibly stubborn head, they were just too young. Kurt loved Blaine as much as he knew how, but there was so much time ahead of them. Rachel and Finn actually had the legal rights to get married, whether it was going to end up ruining their lives or not, while he and Blaine were forced to sit on the sidelines, wondering if they would ever get that chance.
Kurt realizes that he's been staring off into space for a good few seconds when Blaine places a gentle hand on his knee and murmurs, "Hey, are you okay?"
"Oh, I'm fine," he replies airily, flashing Blaine a quick smile and sliding his hand over Blaine's, twining their fingers together. Blaine smiles back, eyes brimming with everything he can't say here; Kurt knows Blaine supports Finn and Rachel's decision to get hitched, but he also knows that Blaine feels just as strongly about the marriage equality issue as he does. They've talked about it many times, words stretching deep into the night with Blaine's curly head tucked under Kurt's chin, or over half-noticed homework assignments scattered across Blaine's bedroom floor; truth be told, they're both envious of how easy this is for Finn and Rachel.
Rachel bounces anxiously on her toes, shifting her phone restlessly from hand to hand. Tina and Mercedes exchange a long look, and Mr. Schuester and Coach Sylvester exit the room, saying something about asking the Justice of the Peace to wait just a few more minutes.
"I'm just going to call her," Rachel bursts out, casting a harried glance at the clock on the wall. "Girls, will you please go stall or something? Tell them we can start as soon as Quinn arrives, please?"
Santana sighs audibly, flipping her carefully styled black hair over her shoulder, but rises to her feet, offering Brittany a hand and guiding the blonde out of the room.
"Maybe Quinn got attacked by that vampire or something," Kurt hears Brittany mumble as she and Santana exit, and smothers a small smile behind his hand. Poor, innocent Brittany; at least she truly believes that life is as good as she sees it.
Rachel brings the phone to her ear and turns her back on those remaining in the room, her free hand fidgeting with her veil.
"We'll see you guys at the altar," Mercedes says lowly, pushing herself off the couch and patting Kurt's knee.
"Hopefully," Tina mutters, glancing at the clock again. Both girls stride quickly out the door, leaving Kurt and Blaine alone with Rachel for a blissful four seconds of silence before Kurt hears the heavy, stumbling thumps that announce Finn's rapid approach.
"Rach, we're seriously gonna lose our spot!" Finn begs without preamble, swinging his upper body into the room. He looks slightly panicked, and Kurt almost feels bad, because Finn is no doubt honestly fearing that Rachel is going to leave him before they even reach the altar.
"Yes, I know, Finn, I'm coming – hello?" Rachel's brow creases and she claps a hand to her ear, listening intently to the voice on the other end of the phone. "No, I'm sorry, who is this? Where's Quinn?"
Rachel's eyes grow wide and her mouth drops open, and alarm bells clang in Kurt's head. Both he and Blaine shift forward, trying to hear even a word of the other side of Rachel's conversation. Finn seems frozen in the doorway, looking so absolutely confused that Kurt would have laughed had the situation not been dangling so precariously on the edge of serious.
"Oh my god," Rachel whispers, and the room is so dead silent that Kurt can hear the beating of his own anxious heart in his ears. His hand darts out to find Blaine's and grips tight; something is very, very wrong, and Kurt's stomach dances itself into painfully familiar knots.
"I… I – alright –" Rachel Berry, for once, is utterly speechless, and if that isn't a sign of tragedy, Kurt doesn't know what is. Rachel sinks unsteadily onto the leather couch, color bleeding rapidly from her face.
"Rach, what's wrong?" Finn whispers from the doorway, fingers frozen tight on the doorframe. Blaine glances at Kurt, and Kurt's stomach performs another painful flip at how downright scared Blaine looks, lips parted and trembling, eyes full of wordless concern. Kurt squeezes Blaine's hand even tighter, feeling his fingers protest, but dismisses the pain that pinches at his circulation.
"Um, okay, I – what did you say your name was?" Rachel's voice is shaking, and Kurt wants to snatch the phone from her hand, hit her over the head with the nearest bridal magazine, and demand to know what the hell is happening, because this feeling, this thick, cloying feeling slowly filling the room is much too familiar. When he had heard about David earlier in the week, this feeling was what had strangled him, pooled in his lungs and left him breathless. Kurt isn't sure if he can handle it again, and he is seized with the sudden impulse to leap to his feet, to run, to escape, just get away from the odor of tragedy rapidly coating his throat, but Blaine's fingers squeeze even tighter and the sharp flash of pain roots him there, keep him grounded.
"Okay, thank you, yes, we'll contact her parents, thanks…" Rachel's phone slips from her fingers and she slumps forward, shaking hands pressing to her white face.
"Rachel, what happened?" Kurt snaps, jumping up and kneeling next to Rachel at the same time Finn stumbles in and drops next to her, looking downright terrified now. "Who was that, Rachel? Where's Quinn?"
"I… I was texting her…" Rachel whispers, stricken. "I was texting her and she-"
"What happened, Rachel?" Blaine asks, taking one of Rachel's trembling hands in his and squeezing it reassuringly, and Kurt wants to cling to his boyfriend and never let him go, because Blaine, somehow, always knows exactly what to do. "Just take a breath and tell us."
"She crashed," Rachel chokes, and tears are pouring down her cheeks and the air is sucked out of the room like a vacuum, vanishing into nothing with a nearly audible pop. Kurt can't breathe and he heard what Rachel said, but he's not sure if he can believe it or not. "She – she crashed – she got hit by a truck – and it's all my fault."
Rachel dissolves into horrible, wracking sobs, her small hands twisting in the white fabric of her wedding dress, and Finn just looks blank, hand rubbing up and down Rachel's heaving back as if controlled by an outside force. Kurt sags a little, back into Blaine's chest, and oh god, Quinn.
"Oh my god," Blaine breathes, and Finn blinks several times at the sound of his voice, staring at a point over Rachel's head, and Kurt can practically see the cogs in his stepbrother's head turning, trying to process, trying to comprehend.
"Is she… alive?" Kurt whispers, and his voice is so much higher than normal, and he hates how fucking scared he sounds.
"I don't – yes, I think so – there were sirens, I think they were getting her out – that's what Cooper said –"
"Who the hell is Cooper?" Finn demands, his voice cracking. Rachel just shakes her head, choking on her tears, and Finn pulls his hand to his throat, yanking his tie loose with a shuddering intake of breath.
"Wait, Cooper?" Blaine says blankly, and Kurt glances over at him, questioning. Rachel straightens up a little and nods, rubbing frantically at her eyes and smearing dripping makeup all over her cheekbones.
"He was the one who answered the phone – I think he was the one who hit her – I-" Rachel breaks off and staggers to her feet, dropping her phone to the red leather of the couch, and Finn follows like a puppet drug along by its string, eyes glazed. "I have to tell Mr. Schue, her parents don't even know, god –" Rachel's hand flies to her mouth and she rushes from the room, Finn stumbling dazedly in her wake.
"Shit," It's the only thing Kurt can think to say, and he collapses, legs sprawling unceremoniously beneath him, and he feels weightless, like he's not really here anymore, rooted only by that black feeling, of tragedy, of fucking death. He can't draw breath and chokes a little, hand flying to cover his mouth, and how did this happen so fast?
Blaine presses in close behind him, and Kurt can feel his boyfriend's whole body shaking as Blaine loops his arms around Kurt's waist, clinging to him. Kurt twists around in Blaine's grasp, pressing his face into the smooth line of Blaine's neck, breathing Blaine in, trying to be calm when there's no calm left for him to pull from.
Quinn. Oh god, Quinn. Just an hour ago she's been walking down the hall of McKinley in her old Cheerios uniform. She'd been so happy, she'd talked to them, and now…
"She… she said Cooper, right?" Blaine asks softly, and he sounds so small and scared that Kurt lifts his head to meet Blaine's eyes, huge and uncertain as they gaze back at him.
It takes Kurt a second to find his voice, but finally manages, "I think so… why?"
Blaine runs a hand through his thickly gelled hair, eyes darting around the room, unable to settle. His eyebrows contract tight across his forehead and he opens and closes his mouth a few times before he replies.
"I mean, it probably doesn't mean anything, but… my brother's name is Cooper."
