So I was thinking about all the silly things Chris Colfer claims he does while he's sleeping, and I got this idea in my head and just thought it would make for a very funny, but also endearing, story! I hope you all enjoy it!
This will probably be a story in two or three parts (:
Pillow Chat
It wasn't until Chris made the comment about the Martians and the space probe that Mark realized something was amiss.
Nothing out of the ordinary had been happening: Mark was sitting on the hotel bed, his back against the headboard, his laptop on his legs, writing lyrics to a new song he was working on. Chris had been sitting pretzel-style in his plaid pajama pants and grey t-shirt next to him for thirty minutes or so, doing some editing on The Land of Stories.
The two had been talking casually the entire time, while the rest of the cast chatted amongst themselves as well – Amber, Dianna, Lea, and Jenna were braiding each other's hair, sitting in front of the bed on which Mark and Chris were diligently working. Kevin, Heather, and Naya were sitting on the floor between the two hotel beds in a heated game of Egyptian Rat Screw.
And lastly, Cory, and Chord sat on the other hotel bed, hard at work on a puzzle in Chris's Ultimate Sudoku book, trying to finish it before Darren and Harry (sitting on the same bed) finished their puzzle in the Ultimate Renogram book (also Chris's. The gang had found that they could always count on him to be the supplier of brain-tickling Japanese math puzzles). All the while, Zombieland was playing on the TV at relatively low volume while everyone chatted in their own little groups about different things.
At that relative thirty minute mark, Mark saw (out of his peripheral vision) Chris close up his notebooks and place them on the nightstand. The boy then proceeded to lie down on the bed, turned on a slight angle to face Mark. This didn't surprise Mark at all – the cast had been very energetic all day. Lots of sight-seeing, lots of fan-meeting… not to mention it appeared that the thirteen of them were the only people in the hotel who, earlier that night, had decided to take advantage of the fact that the hotel had an open-all-night swimming pool.
Just an hour prior to their little "slumber party," the gang delighted at the fact that the pool was completely empty and made a quick dash to get in their swimsuits and start the never-ending shenanigans. Mark and Cory had successfully captured every cast member at least once, giving them all rough tosses into the water, just to "keep them on their toes," as Mark had reasoned.
All that taken into consideration, Mark figured Chris was just getting his R&R. When Chris continued the casual conversation, though, Mark figured he wasn't ready to fall asleep just yet. So they kept chatting, until…
"Do you think those Martians are up to something… you know… sketchy?"
Instinctively, Mark began to nod and respond, but he cut himself short when he realized just how bizarre of a question that had been. Brow furrowing, he looked up at from his computer screen and stared straight ahead, slowly asking, "… What?"
"The Martians – the ones next to the probe that crash-landed on your keyboard – do you think they're up to something?"
Almost cautiously, Mark turned his head to glance down at Chris who, sure enough, was curled up on the pillows right next to where Mark was sitting, reading glasses still on, but eyes just the tiniest bit still open.
In an instant, a thoroughly amused and excited grin spread across Mark's face. He took a quick glance around the room to see if anyone else had noticed Chris's subconscious talking absolute nonsense, but it was clear nobody had. Mark leaned down a little and responded to his sleeping friend, "I don't think so bud. I told them they could hang out on my keyboard until they get their probe all fixed up. Then they'll head back to Mars."
Chris stirred a little, eyes still slightly open behind his glasses, then answered groggily, "Oh… okay. Just wanted to make sure you knew what was going on is all…"
The exhausted, expressionless look on Chris's face was just too much for Mark to handle. He began laughing to himself, and it wasn't long before his chuckles were loud enough for the rest of the gang to pick up on. Cory was the first to react, smirking and rolling his eyes.
"Dude… if it's another 'hysterical sex joke,' you can spare us all the agony. This'd be your fourth one today –"
"No, no, no," Mark stammered, trying hard to stifle his laughter and not wake Chris, "It's not that it's... it's…" biting down on his own knuckle to keep quiet, Mark gestured to the sleeping boy next to him. Darren, it seemed, was the first to catch on. He hopped off his own bed and headed toward Mark and Chris. "Nuh-uh… oh this is too good…"
In a few seconds, all the boys had caught on, already grinning while they thought of the opportunities this presented them with. The girls – kind of mind and compassionate in nature – weren't so devious.
"Should we understand what's going on here?" asked Dianna, smirking and laughing amusedly at the immaturity she and the rest of the girls (and Chris, and occasionally, Kevin) put up with on a daily basis.
"Oh, no…" began Naya, a devious grin spreading across her face as well, "I know what's up…"
"Then please, explain?" Amber requested with a confused little smile.
Naya chuckled and began to gravitate toward Mark and Chris's bed with all the others before answering, "Our man Chris is about to entertain us with some pillow chat…"
"Oh that's so mean!" exclaimed Lea, earning herself a harsh "Shhh!" from all the boys, and from Naya. "What are you gonna do, interrogate him about his personal life?"
"Of course not!" Mark reassured her, watching in amusement as the disapproving looks of herself, Amber, Dianna, Jenna, and Heather were slowly but surely turning to curiosity. Soon, he thought, and accurately so, all of them would be on board as well. The moment was just too perfect. "We're just gonna ask him some funny questions and see what kinda answers he – or should I say his subconscious – comes up with. Who knows, we might learn some things about him that even he doesn't know!"
Mark closed his laptop and set it on the floor while the others gathered near the bed. Chris began to stir again, nearly turning his face into his pillow when Mark stopped him with a soft "Hold up there, bud," and a gentle grip on the boy's shoulders. He didn't want to risk letting him break his glasses by turning on his side. Carefully, Mark slid Chris's glasses off of his nose before folding them up and placing them on the nightstand.
Quietly the boys egged him on, knowing that if anyone could think of a good question to ask Chris Colfer's subconscious, Mark could.
Mark thought for a moment. Of course he wouldn't ask him anything too personal, and of course he didn't want to embarrass him… Well, at least not excessively…. He thought with a grin. He loved the boy like a brother, and that he knew. Anything and everything they asked him would be in good humor.
"I've got it."
I could totally see this happening in real life haha. Hope you're enjoying it so far! Chapter two shall come up soon, and it may end there or there may be a chapter three, not totally sure yet. Thanks for reading! If you feel like it, please tell me what ya think! (:
