Surrender

No one can save me.

Preface: I m Alice…married to James…in love with Jasper

Alice's POV:

I watched myself in the huge mirror. I was short and petite and my dark brown eyes were dull with misery. My hair was long black and reached just below my shoulders, it lay down in curls. I was wearing a short satin yellow sleeveless dress with yellow heeled shoes. I stared at my arms; the bruises had faded and could now be easily covered with make up…that's why he had ordered me to wear this dress. I cringed as I thought of him. My husband.

As if on cue, I heard sharp threatening footsteps. My heart beat increased due to fear and my eyes widened. I turned with a gasp. He stood by the door with a hunter's smile. He loved watching me get scared and I tried hard not to show my fear but I failed…every time!

His light brown hair was perfectly gelled and his pale blue eyes shone and that smile…so sly that it sent shivers down my spine. His tux fit him perfectly. He started walking toward me closing the distance between us and smiled. This time his smile was different, it was angelic. No one would believe me if I told them about his real nature.

"Alice," he breathed. He was almost a foot taller than me; I barely reached his shoulder even though I wore heels.

"James…" it was just a plea.

"You look simply…" he didn't complete his sentence. Just pulled me into a hug and started sniffing my hair, neck and he ran his hand down my back and stopped at my waist. He pulled me away harshly such that I was no more jammed into his chest; he held my arms now, firmly…too firmly. I looked up swallowing, "you will behave wont you?" he asked threateningly.

"Yes," I answered. What else could I do?

"Good," his fingers relaxed, and then he bent to kiss me. I moved back reflexively like every time I did. The cold glass of the mirror froze my shoulders. Anger flashed through his eyes…exactly what I had feared.

Why couldn't I listen to him for once? Why couldn't I give in? From the look he gave me I knew he wanted to thrash me right now, but he controlled himself taking a deep breath.

We had to attend the party. Without another word he dragged me out of my dungeon-his bedroom and down the stairs. Soon we were in the car; I tried to calm down. I wasn't going to think about what was going to happen tonight, I shouldn't; I had to behave or else he would hurt me even more. I took deep breaths calming myself and thought about what to expect at the dance. This party was being held by Carlisle Cullen and his family. James worked for Mr. Cullen, I had met him once, and truly he was the most compassionate person I had ever met.

James drove at a very high speed through Forks, and occasionally touched my arm and I tried not to flinch. We didn't stop anywhere in the town, started moving to the outskirts. He took a bend around the trees, for a moment I was scared, was he lying to me about the party and had got me to hurt here? But he didn't have to drag me somewhere far to hurt me, he managed it perfectly well as it is. Our house was situated in an extremely remote area surrounded by woods and a lone road in the front. I clutched the seat hard and breathed with relief when I saw twinkling lights after few moments, my face lit up with awe.

"We are here, and I want you to behave extremely well" he said in a controlled tone; no one could guess the anger he was hiding except me. I knew he hadn't hurt me recently or in cruelest was just because of this party. Many cars stood in a line, James parked his car in the nearest empty lot and got out, and he opened my door and held out his hand. It was too dark to see what expression he had. I placed my arm in his reluctantly.

We started walking toward the brightly lit area, the beautiful happy mansion that stood welcomingly.

"You are not working hard enough love," he whispered. I took another deep breath and tried to smile and look happy.

"I m trying," I found myself say.

"Try harder then, you know I love you," he smiled gently. Yes, I knew…I knew better, it was actually good when he was being angry and harsh; that was better than when he was gentle.

I composed myself, I was getting good at it, and he smiled at me again and led on.

The party seemed to have started long back. There were many couples swaying to the music in the middle of the huge living room turned dance floor.

"Hello James, Alice," Mr. Cullen greeted us with a warm smile on his face. I felt surprised that he remembered my name; he shook James's hand and kissed me on the cheek.

"Hello Mr. Cullen, nice meeting you," I smiled. "Please call me Carlisle," he smiled and led us to a group of three-a beautiful caramel colored hair woman, and a young bronze hair man holding a blushing brown haired beauty.

"This is my family, James you have already met them, let me introduce them to Alice," he continued beaming.

"This is Esme, my wife; and my son Edward and his fiancé Bella; and everyone, this is Alice, James's wife," he introduced us.

"Pleasure to meet you all," I smiled politely.

"She's a bit shy," James chuckled from beside me.

"Then she and Bella should get along well," Edward laughed making Bella blush even more if possible.

"Excuse us," Carlisle smiled and left with Esme to greet the new set of guests.

Edward and James started talking, I just stood there meekly, and Bella was the same as me. But I could tell the difference, I was quiet because I feared doing something wrong which angered James and Bella seemed truly shy.

"See, didn't I tell you! Bella and Alice do get along well," Edward joked after few minutes.

"Alright, I will save you from further miseries, Bella, dance with me?" Edward whispered the end as a new song started playing. She smiled at us and they left.

"You know she worked in the same company before she knew Edward? She is quite desirable, if I hadn't had you and if she wasn't my boss's to-be wife I would have surely gone after her," he leant and whispered in my ear.

I thanked god that Bella was with Edward, and I was his wife…though I felt sure that he would have gone after her even if I was there but Edward being his boss he had to have some limits. The pay-check provided to James was extremely hefty.

"Come on now, let's dance," James said irritated, held my hand and dragged me toward the dance floor.

He was really tall; I couldn't reach the top of his shoulders so I settled on holding his arm. There was still distance between us, James noticed it too so he pulled me closer with more harshness than necessary.

We moved together song after song, James spoke to me randomly commenting on things and I answered him whenever I thought I should. He went on telling me about the Cullens and Bella Swan's family; and I listened attentively.

"I want to go sit," I told him after a while. His arm tightened around my waist, I clenched my teeth to stop myself from wincing.

"Please?" I whispered.

"Why?" he asked.

"I m tired," I mumbled.

"I don't care…" he pulled me to his chest.

"My leg hurts…please," I pleaded moving back to look at him. My ankle was really starting to bother me, and I remembered why. He had stamped my foot after thrusting me down on the floor when I had tried to run.

"Fine," he said vaguely. I was actually shocked that he had given; I thought he enjoyed watching me in pain.

When the song ended he led me to an isolated table, the waiters got us some drinks and food. But James was distracted, he was watching someone else, I followed his gaze. His eyes were locked at a bright red haired female, she was well built and cat like, and she had a grace in her even though she was just standing. Her tall stature and a dress with a long cut showing her thighs and most of her chest surely had attracted James to her. I realized that she was watching him too.

I turned away from her and watched James, I knew he was going to cheat on me; but I didn't care.

"Aren't you going to eat?" I asked cursing my fate.

"Of course," he turned his attention on me.

After a while he turned vague again, but this time he wasn't watching her, he was watching someone else. A tall man with honey blond hair, he was just a few feet away from us, and as soon as I caught his eye I froze. I knew every feature of his face, though the passing of years had made him manly and hardened him from his boyishness. I knew him and yet I didn't. My face felt hot and I knew I was blushing deeply.

"Are you sure you can't dance?" James asked me, his eyes burned me.

"Yes," I nodded breaking my gaze from the familiar stranger.

"I want you to…stay here," he ordered and got up and left. I sighed in relief. Finally I had some alone time.

"You haven't changed even a little," his voice made my heart flutter. I stood up.

"But you look different," I whispered.

"I haven't changed much, trust me," he held his hand out and I took it.

"Oh Jasper!" I didn't know what took over me but I almost jumped to hug him.

"Alice," he whispered sweetly as his arms held me in his broad chest. I wanted to hold onto him forever. Seeing him again…hearing his voice…in his arms. It felt like…home.

"Hey! I m here now…don't be such a baby," he made me sit and wiped the tears from my face.

"It's been such a long time…and I just…I miss you a lot!" I sniffed.

"Shush Alice, you look so beautiful, don't cry honey," his warm hands cupped my face.

"Sorry," I muttered.

"I missed you a lot too," he said and sat closer to me.

Jasper Whitlock and I had known each other since forever! We grew up together, our parents had been friends and we turned into best friends. The whole of our school life we were a unit. I was always in love with him but I came to know what it really was in my last year at school. Of course I didn't tell Jasper that, he went around dating many girls but it was always too casual. That year Jasper's family moved and we went to different colleges. And there somehow our contact with each other just broke…and I met James. He was three years older than me; of course I had been gratified by a senior's interest in me. And then we dated for one year, he was always so sweet and perfect. And then he proposed and I agreed.

I looked around frightened searching for James; it wasn't hard to find him. He was already looking at me, with a triumphant smile. My heart increased due to fear…his expression so triumphant made me go cold.

I looked at Jasper to make amends; I realized that he was holding my left arm, staring in despair at my third finger on the left hand. I was wearing my wedding band…the mark of my enslavement.

"You're married?" he choked.

"Yeah…" I still didn't know what his feelings were toward me; for all I knew he could be married happily with kids.

"Wow…I just didn't think you would…thought you would wait…" he mumbled to himself.

I didn't know what to say…I kept quiet. James had seen everything that had passed between me and Jasper. It was going to be hell of a night.

I watched James, I didn't have the strength to take my hand from Jasper's; he was holding it firmly.

"You have a friend here!" James said brightly.

"T-that's my husband James," I introduced.

"You can leave my wife's hand now Mr.," he chuckled.

Jasper let go of my hand, it started trembling.

"And you are?" James asked in a direct manner not too rude.

"Jasper Whitlock," Jasper's voice was hard.

"Nice meeting you," James simply stated. He was still smiling widely at me like I had given him the best gift at Christmas.

I turned back to look at Jasper, he stood there frozen his face in anguish. My heart broke; I wanted to go to him…stay with him…hold his hand. Oh god!

"Er…I guess I will see you around Alice, I have to meet someone," he said distractedly, he eyes on James.

"Oh…okay," my voice barely passed as normal. Jasper looked at me now, his gaze softening a million times, he leant and kissed me on the cheek and then nodding at James he left.

James pulled me down to the table and sat across me.

"For the first time you have given me a challenge," he almost growled.

"What?" I asked him scared.

"You'll see honey," he winked.

I swallowed back the fear. He stood up abruptly, and I followed him. I didn't look for Jasper Whitlock again.

James had been quiet the whole time, he didn't say a word. We reached home; he walked forward to our bedroom without even looking at me. I locked up the house, locked myself within the wall and walked up. My knees were shaking.

Taking a deep breath I stopped in front of my torture room.

"Come in Alice," his voice was strangely calm.

He was sitting on the couch, his coat and shirt lay on the floor and his hair was ruffled. He had a bottle and a glass filled with his favorite drink. He shot down two more glasses before looking me at me again. I stood fixed at the door unable to move in.

He got up and started walking toward me, I shivered. He closed the door; holding my hand he led me to the bed.

Kneeling down he removed my shoes, and massaged my hurt foot.

"I-I m s-sorry," I stammered. His fingers tightened.

"For?" he looked at me. I didn't reply, I knew that he knew why.

Standing up he stared at me for a long while, I didn't look up…not once. And then he slapped me. My cheek stung and I fell on the bed.

"I'm sorry!" I cried.

"Jasper Whitlock makes your heart flutter my love?" he growled pulling my hair.

I screamed in pain.

"Did you like him hug you? Kiss you?" he twisted my arm.

"Stop! Please!" I begged crying.

"Don't you ever lie to me!" he growled.

"He was my best friend…" I cried.

"And you loved him I presume," he gave me another slap.

He zipped the back of my dress open, I thought he was going to strip me off and hurt me but he pushed me from the bed on the ground, my back was exposed to him; he had got his leather belt out and started whipping me. I curled up in a ball and tried to stay as quiet and immobile as possible so that he would get bored. But he didn't stop.

Finally after what seemed like ages the stinging stopped. My back hurt, and I couldn't stop crying. I didn't have the strength to move; he picked me up; the part of my back which he touched felt like it was on fire. I begged him…pleaded him to stop.

He dropped me on the soft covers of the bed, I turned and lay on my front unable to bear the touch of fabric against my cut and slashed back.

"Oh no, this wont do," he whispered in my ear and turned me back and lay on me holding me.

"No…" I cried. He stopped my screams by pressing his lips against mine. I tried to move my arm scratching him across his bare chest but his finger locked around my wrists. All I could do was cry…just cry. Tears fell down my eyes as I tried to ignore what he was doing to me. This was the first time he was forcing me into something more than just a kiss. I felt my dress being tugged and removed. I struggled but I was too weak to move him even an inch.

"Stop…please," I pleaded repeatedly but he never stopped. He just grew harsher every second. I would have take a thousand stings from the leather belt than feeling his lips against every part of me.

"Jasper…" I cried sub-consciously. This was the biggest mistake that I might have ever done. He pressed against me, his fingers digging in my skin…I had thought he was harsh before but what he was doing now was nothing compared to before. I could feel his anger…his desire to hurt me…to break me.

I don't know at what point but I fell unconscious. But the last thing I remember was my pain…extreme pain, his pleasure at it and his growl in my ear.

Believe me I wished that I was dead.

The next morning I woke up covered in sheets, and bright light filled our room. I remembered what had happened last night, I couldn't even cry. I felt empty. I felt dead. I wanted to die. I wanted to look around…to see if he was next to me, but I could hardly move.

I felt dirty…impure; wanted to clean myself from his touch.

With a very huge effort I clung to the sheets of the bed and crawled into the bathroom. I took a quick cold bath which soothed the stings on my back and dressed in a long white full sleeved gown. I looked at myself in the mirror, my eyes had lost their shine and lips were puffed, my left cheek was bruised and my skin was pale. I couldn't even look at my neck, arms and other parts of my body.

"Admiring yourself?" I was startled by his entry. My throat went dry. I trembled just by looking at him, and I didn't know if I could bear it if he touched me again.

"You're mine now, completely," he purred and brushed his lips against my ear.

Every night the same pattern repeated and each night was worse than the previous. I never got used to his touch but was awake for longer hours, awake to feel the pain he inflicted on me. When morning came he left and I let my thoughts return to Jasper. I had forced myself to not think of him wishing he was here to keep me safe. Sometimes I slipped and said out his name pleadingly and James would unleash his full force on me…he was such a monster! The bruises on my body didn't have a chance to recover as they were renewed each night. It felt like they were going to be permanently itched to my body.

Two weeks had passed since the dance, I was having breakfast or rather trying to have when he said, "We are going to have guests tonight," he stared at me.

"Ok," I mumbled.

"I m going to get food and other things so you don't have to do anything except turning yourself presentable," he commanded. I cringed under his scrutiny. The bruises on my bare arms screamed for attention. He was watching them too.

"Do you hate me?" he asked mockingly. I looked down not replying, of course I hated him! But I surely couldn't tell him that. He would kill me.

"I asked, do you hate me?" he shouted.

"N-no," I lied.

"You are so pathetic, such a coward Alice," he sneered. I bit my lip controlling the tears which threatened to roll down.

"I don't have time for you now, just be perfect in the evening," he said dismissively and got up. Leaving the hardly eaten food on my plate I got up too.

He bent to kiss me, as I thrust my fingers deep into my palm. "Bye…love you," he smirked and left.

I went around my closet trying to search for something chic and also covering. I settled on a white satin close neck shirt with sleeves until my elbow and matched it up with plain black knee length trousers. I was feeling very tired, I wanted to sleep for a while. There was still a lot of time left, I could easily take a bath later and dress up. Sighing, I went to the guest room. I didn't want to sleep on his bed willingly.

Brushing the last bit of make up off my face, I studied myself. My black hair was in a side plait and my arms were well covered up. James was right now taking a shower, I sat on the edge of the couch waiting for him to check on me; I started wondering about the guests whom he had invited. When he came back from work he seemed so excited. It scared me.

"You have cleaned up well!" I looked up startled.

Unable to say anything I just stared at him, his light brown hair was wet and he had wrapped a towel around his waist and moving through his closet looking for clothes. A sight that would have made my heart sped before he had married me…but now, I felt nothing at all.

"So which do you think is going to go well? This or this?" he suddenly asked holding a blue and purple shirt.

I stared at him. "Which?" he asked raising his right eye brow.

"Umm…the blue?" I suggested.

"Hmm," he went back to the closet leaving me shocked. This was one of the very rare times that I was actually having a 'sane' conversation with him; it felt so abnormal.

After few minutes he came out dressed in the very same blue shirt I had chosen on dark jeans with boots. He came and sat down next to me, instantly I stiffened.

"Who are the guests?" I blurted out, the suspense was killing me.

"Now, I don't want you to be stammering and frightened," he ignored my question and spoke staring at my dark brown eyes, I could see the blaze of anger in his.

"I-I…okay," I muttered looking down.

"Or else you know what I might do," he threatened.

"I know," I mumbled.

He held lifted my chin with one hand and his other hand moved across my back…I winced slightly, my back hadn't healed completely from the belting he had done few days ago.

He was so close now, just inches of distance between our lips, "you're so beautiful," he whispered. I shivered. Smiling at my discomfort he pulled me into a kiss.

Hearing the door bell James and I went down, I walked at my pace claming myself while he almost ran, this time not dragging me along with him.

"Hey James," I heard a familiar voice.

"Hello everyone, welcome to our home," he smiled at them genially. I stood behind him and looked at them. James pulled me next to him beaming.

Edward was leading the group with Bella, and they were followed my Emmett and his girlfriend Rosalie (Emmett was Bella's brother and Edward's best friend. I had met them once before), next were Mike and Jessica who worked in the same office and last and the most surprising person who took my breath away…Jasper Whitlock!

I had no idea how Jasper was known to Edward, a thought that I hadn't encouraged before. His pale blue eyes met mine and I was at home. I smiled at him, he smiled back but it didn't reach his eyes completely.

I hadn't realized that James had been watching me shrewdly, but when I stole a glance at him I knew the reason for this party.

Together we went to the living room where James spoke, "I haven't seen you around, Jasper right?" he asked smiling at him.

"Yeah, I moved back from Phoenix…" he nodded briskly.

"You do seem to know Alice?" this time it was Rosalie who questioned. I blushed unnecessarily.

"We were together from kindergarten till school…then we just lost connection," his eyes softened as he spoke about us.

"It's wonderful that you guys met again!" James piped in enthusiastically squeezing my arm.

The talk went on for a while, and then it was time for dinner. James sat at the head of the table and me at my usual place. Beside me Jasper took his place, it was difficult for me to let things remain awkward between Jasper and me. Soon we were laughing and talking of old times.

"You haven't changed at all!" Jasper sighed.

"I guess," I said. I was myself surprised; being with Jasper had brought my old self back…I never thought it would have been possible, not after what James had done to me. I glanced at James; he appeared in a conversation with Edward. It was my turn to sigh. In relief.

"What?" Jasper asked.

"Nothing," I continued with dinner.

It all seemed like a dream to me…happened but wasn't going to last long. Soon we were saying our goodbyes. Jasper came up to me and hugged me; I wanted to stay in his arms forever.

"Bye Al," he smiled after releasing me.

"Goodbye Jazz," I whispered.

And then he was gone…leaving me…in hell. My prison doors shut.

I turned slowly, crying. "Aw…" James pushed me, I stumbled against the door.

"James…" I protested as he stood holding my waist. The way he was glaring at me, I was sure…if looks could kill, I would be dead.

"What?" he asked.

"Not tonight," I whispered. "Please," I begged.

"And why should I listen to you?" he asked.

"Please," I pleaded.

"Alice…Alice…Alice…Jasper makes you happy doesn't he?" his finger encircled my arms.

My eyes widened. "And how dare you? How dare you let him touch you! You are mine!" he continued.

I was tongue tied. His eyes were raged, and his breathing was heavy.

"James let go!" I cried.

He dragged me harshly by my arm. Thrusting me on the couch he started to rip off my top. My struggles were received by a blow in the gut.

His lips were on mine, I tried to get him away from me but I was weak…very weak. I felt my body going limp as he continued his assault.

"I never loved you Alice, never! I just wanted you…and now I have you," he whispered in my ear.

"And Jasper did try to keep in touch…only it didn't reach you," he chuckled maliciously.

I froze horrified! James! He had planned this to get me!

"Shush, have you ever though it would be easier if you try not to struggle every time I touch you?" he asked kissing me ear.

Yes, I had considered that but I just couldn't stay still when he touched me! It was an instinct based reaction.

"That's okay love, I m not complaining." I chuckled in my ear. "I like it this way," I growled.

When James left me on the couch I thought it was over, but the rational part of me knew that this had been too easy for him. He wouldn't stop until he did something major. And tonight had been very different than others…I had been close to someone else, I had let my guard down…I had felt the spark and James had seen it, and he wouldn't let me go so easily.

Trembling I tried to sit up, pain shot across my foot, I winced. Somehow my leg had been hurt, this time I was sure I had to go to a doctor. Only if I didn't have marks which spoke about my assault on me and more than that James would never allow me to.

"Going somewhere?" he asked as he came from behind the couch.

He came and knelt down with a malicious grin, I stared at him and then at the small sharp looking knife that he had brought along, he placed it on the table but I couldn't tear my eyes away from it.

"Aaah!" I screamed. James was holding my foot too firmly.

"It's not broken, just a sprain, but it's going to hurt a lot," he stared at me. His last words hit me; he was going to hurt me worse than ever. Every night I thought this and every night it surpassed the limit. Wonder when I will break.

He knelt there with a firm expression caressing my knee; trying not to hurt my leg I moved down so that I was close to his than I had ever been willingly after the wedding. I watched his eyes widen in surprise. And then narrow when I held his hair gently (that was all I could do) with my right hand and placed my left hand on his shoulder for support.

I was now squashed between him and the couch, there was no escape. I had to execute my words out with extreme care. I didn't want to anger him further.

"What's it darling?" he asked, his eyes pierced mine.

"I-I…" I stammered.

"You know you can tell me anything love," he smiled his hunter smile.

"Don't do this please," I pleaded. Anger flashed in his eyes, so much for my planning!

"Don't do what?" he asked crisply.

"Don't…don't hurt me," I looked down feeling scared to look at him. I wanted to be no where close to him now.

"You know you earned it," he held me by my arms forcing me close to him sensing my thoughts.

"I'm sorry," I cried.

He didn't reply but got up abruptly pushing me down. Well, I had tried…

I continued watching him fearfully; he was searching for something but couldn't find it. I hoped he would never find it, then the night would pass and he wouldn't hurt me much…a child's wishful thinking.

"You know what? That top of yours is already worn and torn, so it really wont be of much use to you but it is going to be of very much use to me," his eyes were lit with excitement.

"Huh?" I stared as he came closer.

He pulled me up, and held the part where my top had torn off and tugged at it. He pulled top off. Smiling in satisfaction, he pushed me and I fell on the floor. My leg wasn't up for much standing. He was by my side at once, not to help me, of that I was sure.

He twisted my hands behind my back and tied it was the cloth that he had torn from my top.

"What are you doing?" I asked, so far he had never needed to take such measures. I was too weak.

"Patience…" was all he said. Then he turned me so that I lay on my back, my arms were killing me, it pained a lot.

"You are going to love this," he smiled crookedly. All I could see was his huge body on knees by my side. I didn't understand his posture until he picked up the knife.

My eyes widened…he was going to kill me! At least it would be over, I will have to suffer for few more hours only, not much longer. That was of some comfort.

"Stop dreaming! I m not going to kill you," he smirked. Then? What was he doing?

I felt the cool tip of the knife against my stomach; I started to struggle again. But his left arm was holding my hair and his knee was on my leg, and my wrists were tied. I could do nothing.

Tears just fell down my eyes continuously, "You are mine, just mine," he said and applied pressure; the sharp blade sliced my skin and I let out a scream. It felt like squeezing lemon on open wounds…I couldn't bear it and screamed the whole time. Begged for him to stop, he never tried to insert the knife in me, just at the skin but enough to cause pain.

"Guess what I m carving on you?" his voice was filled with enthusiasm.

"Stop…please!" I begged him.

"J…A…M…E…S! And trust me, these scars are never going to leave you, they are deep enough." He reached the left end of my stomach and then retraced it several times. He stopped again…I lay there gasping for breath; I could feel the hot blood pour out of me, now I was left with burning sensation. He pulled my arm harshly, my wrist twisted and I knew I had broken another bone.

He cut the skin on my right arm but kindly informed me that he was just writing his initials. Through my half closed eyes I saw him remove his shirt and felt it being tied around my stomach. I whimpered and tried to find a comfortable spot.

His arms swept around my and he stood up carrying my fragile body upstairs. He placed me on the floor and sat down beside me with his arm around me and untied his shirt from my stomach and threw it aside. I gasped as the cold water touched my head and then my skin. I don't know how long we sat there; I watched the water flow ahead mixed with red blood to finally colorless again. I touched my stomach…the bleeding seemed to have stopped; James knew what he was doing. But the burning was still there…light and numb, it was there.

After few moments he picked me up from the floor and made me sit on the slab by the sink. He got a towel and started drying me, and then he applied something on my stomach that stung for a moment but then made the area cold and numb and got a bandage and wrapped it around to prevent further bleeding. What was he doing? First he wants to hurt me and now was all for cleaning up? No, this was not the James I knew, he was cruel and sadistic, he would never feel regret! My suspicion was interrupted when he handed me my pale blue nighty and went out.

Shivering I stood on my good leg and put on the thin dress, not wanting to make him wait outside I went into the room. He already seemed to have changed into dry clothes-just shorts.

"Feeling cold?" he asked.

"No," I lied staring at my feet hardly able to stand.

I stumbled as he wrapped his bare arms around me and pulled me close to his bare chest. Was he going to let me sleep now? Or was going to continue with his torture?

"Feeling warmer now?" he asked.

I didn't reply and earned a squeeze, "answer me now!" he ordered.

"Y-yes," I stammered.

"But you are still shivering…" he mused.

"No…" my voice was barely audible.

"How about I make you burn?" he asked.

"What?" I asked confused.

And then I felt a prick on my shoulder. That's it? I would have taken a hundred pricks like this instead of the knife being sliced on the stomach. The next thing that happened make me take back my thoughts…I felt a burning sensation, much worse than the one I had felt when he had cut me spread across from my shoulders to the rest of my body.

James moved back and I fell onto the floor, I was in agony! It felt like I was on fire but I wasn't. I stared at James pleading with my eyes to end it but he just watched me with a smile…a-hunter-who-got-his-prey's smile.

I writhed in pain, screaming when I felt him on top of me again. I gritted my teeth to deprive him of the satisfaction he got when I screamed, but his lips were on mine and it was just impossible to hide my pain. I couldn't take this, I wanted to die! I crying…praying for this pain and assault to end. Help me! Someone just help me!

"Help!" I screamed when his mouth left mine.

"Who is going to hear you here Alice?" he laughed and continued. It was true anyway, no one would hear me…not a single person. This house was situated between the woods…completely isolated. Not even a car passed from here…no one would save me.

I might have started bleeding again, I felt sticky but I wasn't sure, and then I felt my head hit something and black spots appeared in front of my eyes. Soon I was gasping for breath.

The air around me changed, it became much colder and wet. I opened my eyes with difficulty to see the clear sky and feel the cold stone under me. We were in the balcony; James was still holding me, taking in pleasure at my stake.

Seconds, minutes, hours might have passed but the burning remained and James's constant touch reminded me what was happening. I still didn't faint. My neck felt extremely sore from his harsh touch and the rest of my body…I couldn't even speak about that. I just lay whimpering unable to speak anything. Unable to plead…unable to ask him to stop. I had reached the limits. Lost the count of the times James forced me, lost the count of everything he had done. I was now mentally assaulted, I knew it. If I made through this alive which was impossible, and I would never be the same. I was just an empty shell now.

I had lived the utmost and constant pain…now more of it meant nothing. I didn't struggle, didn't stop him from continuing his movements, not only because I didn't have the strength to but because I had lost the will as well. All this while there had been a hope in me that he would realize his mistake and repent it…it was just a very small hope in the deepest corner of my heart. But it was dead now, dead just like me.

The pressure on me lessened with sudden abruptness. Was it over? Was he going to give me sometime to rest before he started again? Sometime would be nice…not much, but just a little.

"Alice?" the voice from my heaven called me. Jasper…?

Oh no! I should be dreaming of Jasper now, what if I whispered his name or something? That would anger James, and I didn't want him to be angrier…not now, not when I had submitted myself to him completely.

"Alice…can you hear me sweetheart?" my angel's voice was in despair. That was wrong. He shouldn't be sad.

"Alice! Please, please open your eyes," it felt like he was crying.

No this couldn't be my imagination…it couldn't be.

I forced open my eyes and stared at the angel's face. He looked like he was in pain that made me want to comfort him. I wanted to laugh at my stupidity, here I was hardly able to move and I wanted to comfort him in his pain.

"Thank god! Alice…oh god," he looked helpless.

If this was real, then I would be lucky, if it wasn't…well, I had tried then hadn't I? so I said, "Kill me…" it came out like a broken whisper and I didn't know if Jasper had heard it or not. But just then I lost my consciousness. Everything started turning black…and I was glad for it.

James might actually stop now, what was the fun in hurting me when I wasn't there to feel it, right? Nothingness engulfed me. And Jasper's face blurred.