Author's Note:

This is my first fic. Please be kind. As to flamers--- you can eat fuckin shit! Go ahead with your futile attempts to insult me. Nothing insults me. I don't care. But I would prefer if flamers wouldn't hog up my reviews.

Yes, my username is 'smoldering' and I don't like 'flamers', I'm aware of the parody.

By the way, this fic is rated 'T' because of the language of some characters in the fic, but mostly because of my foul tongue.

Anyway, this is one I thought of at five o'clock this morning, so on with the fic!

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Chapter 1: The Other Self

Jonouchi Katsuya swaggered in the direction of Domino High School, his clothes wrinkled and his school jacket open, as it always was. He practically owned the streets, and he wasn't going to let anyone forget it.

As he walked up the steps to the front doors, he noticed that Anzu was standing outside by herself. She seemed to have just come out, and walked down the steps, daydreaming.

Jonouchi thought this odd. She was almost always with Yugi.

After about a minute, Anzu noticed Jonouchi's presence, and looked at him, confused.

"Oh hey Jonouchi. You and Yugi done having your little talk about fights?"

In response to this, Jonouchi blinked stupidly.

"Anzu, what are you talkin about? I just got here!"

"Now Jonouchi, it doesn't matter what your excuse is. Everyone saw you! You can't pretend you weren't there!"

Another stupid blink.

"Um…Anzu, are you feelin okay today? I just now got here."

The two teens stared at each other for a moment, then Anzu suddenly cried out in anguish, "Oh Jonouchi! You have amnesia! Why do bad things always have to happen to my friends! What's your name? What's my name? How many fingers am I holding up? When's your birthday? Who's your best friend? What's your sister's name? Who's your mortal enemy? What really annoys you? What is the meaning of life!"

She said this all very quickly.

"Ok, in order, Jonouchi Katsuya, Anzu Mazaki, two, January 25, Yugi Motou, Shizuka, Seto Kaiba, you, eating. That's all my answers."

Anzu eyed him warily.

"The real Jonouchi would never be able to remember all of my questions!"

"Hey! I can rememba things just fine! I know the lunch menu from now until December!"

"Now that sounds like the Jonouchi we all know and love. Well, I don't understand what's going on here, but let's go inside with our friends."

They went inside, weaving throughout the hallways, Anzu leading the way to show Jonouchi where the gang was hanging out today. Granted, she was still very confused, but was forced to accept that it really was Jonouchi and not some trick of another psychopathic maniac hell-bent on taking over the world. Only the real Katsuya Jonouchi could accomplish a feat like memorizing the lunch menu for the next three months.

"What are we having for lunch…November 24th?" she asked, just to make sure.

"Pizza."

"December 2nd?"

"Sushi."

"October 12th?"

"It's the weekend."

"Damn you're good."

"I take pride in knowing my food", Jonouchi replied smugly, just as they turned the corner, into the hallway where their friends were. What they saw made everyone freeze instantly.

It was Jonouchi. But, it wasn't Jonouchi. Jonouchi was standing at the end of the hall with Anzu. However, he was also standing with Yugi, Honda, Otogi, and Shizuka. Both Shizuka and Yugi were reprimanding Jonouchi for getting into yet another fight. Honda and Otogi were standing back, gaping over Shizuka's form, though every time she turned back to look at them they would immediately take 'casual' poses.

"Oh. My. God. There's two Jonouchis! What the hell?" Anzu said, getting attention from Yugi and friends, who had not yet become aware of her presence. They looked between the two Jonouchis.

"I suspect dark magic is at work here", said Atemu from his soul room. Yugi shook his head.

"I don't think so. I think this was unintentional."

"Hey Jonouchi, did you get stuck in the cloning machine?" Honda asked.

"How is it possible that they could both be Jonouchi?" wondered Atemu.

"I don't know, but it is. I think that they really are both Katsuya Jonouchi", Yugi replied.

Jonouchi walked up to his other self, mouth slightly ajar, then poked the other to ensure he was real.

"Ow! Don't do that!" said the other Jonouchi (to ease the confusion, we'll call the other Jonouchi 'Katsuya' and our Jonouchi 'Jonouchi') "I am you one day from now."

Jonouchi looked at what he would look like one day from now. Katsuya had a black eye, many bruises, and cuts on his face.

"What the hell happened to you? I mean me? And how can you be me tomorrow if you're here?"

"It's a long story. In the future, a gang was goin to beat you up as you went home today and steal your rarest cards. So, I came back in time to prevent it from happenin, and beat up the three thugs who were goin to beat you up later today", Katsuya replied.

The others comprehended all right, but this information went way over Jonouchi's head.

"Well, wouldn't you need a time machine or somethin to come back here?" Jonouchi asked, after a moment of vainly attempting to work things out.

"Yeah, I used a time machine."

"They master the flow of time in the next 24 hours?" Anzu asked.

"Yeah, dis scientist creates three time machines--- a prototype dat he gives to da museum, one dat he keeps for himself, and one dat he gives to da government. Last night…er, tonight, after I get beat up, I break into da museum and steal it. It isn't easy; I almost get caught. But den, out in the street, I was almost home, when dis guy grabs me and pulls me in an alley. He knew I had da time machine. He said to give it to him cause meddlin wit time is dangerous. It was the guy who created it, and he said he was gonna destroy them and then kill himself, cause he was the only one who knew how to make em, ya know? Well, I still wanted revenge and I came back here. I'm surprised it worked; I don't even know how da thing operates."

" 'Operates'? Hey Jonouchi, you learn a new word between now and tomorrow", Honda sneered.

"Aw, shut up, Honda! So you don't know how to get back to da future?"

"Wait till tomorrow, I guess?" Katsuya suggested.

"No, you can't stay here!" piped up Shizuka suddenly, "You have to go back to your own time, or you could throw the fabric of time and space off-balance! You shouldn't meddle with time, big brother. I mean, what would people think if they saw two Jonouchis?"

"Don't worry Shizuka, I'll go back. There was just something I had to take care of. I had to change the future. And as soon as I figure out how this time machine works, I'll go."

"Well, let us see it. Maybe we can help you figure it out. I mean, Yugi figured out the Millennium Puzzle. What are friends for?" said Anzu cheerily.

From the inside of his school jacket, Katsuya pulled an hourglass, filled with tiny, shimmering golden grains of sand.

"It's so pretty", Shizuka murmured.

"Well, here, let me see it", said Anzu, reaching out to take it. Suddenly, Katsuya pulled it back, clutching it to his chest, glaring at her.

"No! You can't have it! You won't give it back! It's mine! MY PRECIOUS!"

Everyone sweatdropped.

"You can trust me. I'm you, after all. You can trust yourself", said Jonouchi.

"Well…dat makes sense, I guess", Katsuya replied, reluctantly handing Jonouchi the time machine.

Jonouchi looked over the time machine for a few seconds, when suddenly, there was a golden flash, and a sound like an explosion, as Jonouchi disappeared and everyone was knocked to the ground, unconscious.

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Author's Note: It was okay, I guess. It'll get better.