This is AU of One Piece, so some stuff might be wrong but I tried to get it as close to the real story as possible.


I do not own One Piece.


The Sorrow Takes Hold


"When you lose a person you love so much, surviving the loss is difficult."

-Cristiano Ronaldo


He had lost everything.

The pain ripped at his very being and nothing could extinguish it.

His tears had long since dried and the blood that stained his fingers was dried. He could still see the image of their corpses lying on the ground, bleeding as he attempted to put them back together in no hope. He could still smell the ashes of his sister and watched as they wafted into the air. He could still feel the blood coating his hands as he tried to save them but they had long since been dead.

His screams ended only a few nights ago when his throat had dried up and shadows hung under his eyes. He was the haunting figure of death yet was still alive, for some reason he did not know of.

He should have died with them yet his body did not accept this fate.

His legs made him ran and his hands covering his mouth to silence his own screams of wanting to be killed and be with them.

Yet, he was not fortunate enough.

The loss had taken hold of him and he could no longer accept the reality, that he was only survivor and would soon too die.


Trafalgar Law shot up with sweating covering his body and face from the nightmare. His eyes shot around to see if he was still in the cursed town of Flevance, surrounded by corpses that continued to bleed out even after many days of being shot down. He released a breath after seeing he was still on the Thousand Sunny yet the nightmare had taken hold of him.

He quietly moved to the deck, trying to move around the sleeping bodies of the Straw Hat crew. None noticed the Surgeon of Death as he took note of the sky and saw the moon was out with the stars glistening down on the ocean.

He rubbed his aching body and brushed his hair and closed his eyes for a second.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU SAVE ME, NII-SAN?!"

His eyes shot back open and felt his heartbeat explode within his chest. Her voice haunting his very core and he blinked, hoping to stay awake so he wouldn't be haunted by those nightmares.

He muttered quickly and quietly to himself, "Shut up."

He hoped her voice would be gone and he wouldn't have to hear her screams if he said that yet it proved him wrong.

He knew he sounded crazy yet replying back to her voice, mostly silenced her.

"YOU PROMISED YOU WOULD PROTECT ME!"

He scowled at her voice and grinded his teeth against each other. He gripped his hand tight and looked around to see if she was anywhere.

"Shut the hell up." He hissed out again and bite his lip to silence himself. If he were to slip up again, someone would wake up and he didn't need that to happen.

He didn't need them to concerned that he was possibly crazy.

He leaned against the ship and released a breath, rubbing his face and slapping himself gently.

He didn't need to sleep.

He needed to stay awake and he would do that any cost.


Crying was heard in the distant and he slowly turned towards the direction it was in. His eyes hollowed out and sunk deep in his skull, looking much like the dead around him but still was breathing. An emotionless frown always kept on his face and continued to move in the direction of it, crying echoing off of the rubbled walls. He struggled to get around but still made it through until he reached his destination.

The exact place where they had all died.

His eyes grew wide at the sight: The enormous building brought to ashes and smell still surrounding the place. The wood scattered around the ground and only the first floor had managed to survive but not in much grace.

His body shook at this and moved towards the building while he heard a distinct voice call out from the rubble.

"ONII-SAN, SAVE ME!"

He bolted towards it with his frail body but it did not stop him. He rushed in towards the direction where she had been kept, hoping she was still there. His breath caught in his throat and began to dig around once he saw the closet underneath the pile of soot, rubble, and ash. His fingers began to bleed and muscles nearly gave out on him as he pulled everything away to get to it.

"ONII-SAN, PLEASE! SAVE ME!"

"I'm almost there!" He shouted and once having everything out of the way. He tried to control his breathing but couldn't help himself as he quickly opened the door and was greeted with horror.

And that's when he screamed again, this time for actually finding her body as to knowing what exactly happened to her.


He again woke up and placed a hand over his beating heart, knowing he needed to control it. He glanced around and saw that he was still on the Straw Hat's boat, the sun slowly grazing over the sea. He narrowed his eyes at this and he clenched his teeth, realizing that he had fell asleep again.

"Good morning, Law."

He turned to the voice of Nico Robin who gave a small smile which he scowled back at before sighing.

"Morning." He replied back and slowly moved away against the boat, slightly feeling off.

"NII-SAN, WHY DIDN'T YOU HAVE ME?"

His breath hitched in his throat at this and attempted to keep his eyes from widen, knowing the shadow of his hat would help with that.

"Did you get enough of sleep?" She asked and he nodded before looking away from her.

"Yeah." He said and hoped she would go away.

"Good, it would be terrible for you be sleep deprived when we are getting close to Dressrosa." She stated and he gripped his knuckles tight, almost tight enough to cause blood to run down. He nodded and she let him be, allowing him for some peace and quiet.

"NII-SAN, DON'T YOU LOVE ME?"

That one got to him and whipped around to see the distorted figure that haunted him. Her skin bleached with white patches while other parts were burned to a crisp, blacken. Her eyes held no emotion in them as they stared him down. Her outfit burned and haunted his very being. Her hair burned right down to her skull with her muscles weak and face sunken into her skull. She looked much like the personification of death itself.

"ROOM!" He shouted and quickly gained attention as others were awoke at the sound of him using his Devil Fruit powers as Nico Robin stared. He watched as she continued to stare at him before he waved his hands around.

"SHAMBLES!" He then again shouted as she quickly disappeared and was replaced with Zoro. The swordsman was quickly awakened at this and glared at the Surgeon of Death, announcing and anger radiating off of him. He released a breath and relaxed as the swordsman quickly got up.

"The hell was that for, bastard?!" Zoro shouted at him and he dropped the ROOM, scowling at this too.

She snuck up on him and he didn't mean to overreact but couldn't help it.

The swordsman continued to yell at him yet it fell on deaf ears, as he could still hear her.

"NII-SAN, WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME BEHIND?"

Normally, she would not be this bad but it could not be helped.

Suddenly reality crashed back into him as the swordsman attacked him with his sword, nearly inches from catching him. He scowled at this and instantly regretted leaving his sword below the deck.

"Are you friggin' listening?" Zero swore at him and he quickly dodged the attack yet a headache pounded against his skull, her voice so strongly crying at him.

"SAVE ME! PLEASE! I DON'T WANT TO DIE, ONII-SAN!"

He swore and tried to block her out but nothing was working.

"Dumbass, pay attention!"

"PLEASE SAVE ME!"

Agony boiled in his veins and felt himself going blank, not caring anymore.

"You've been dead for years. Shut the fuck up already." He casually said and caused Zoro to blink at this, confusion writing across his face at this statement.

"The hell are you talkin' about?" Zoro asked and he again ignored the swordsman.

"DON'T YOU LOVE ME, ONII-SAN?!"

"Huh? Love, what use is that to me anymore? It has only caused me more sorrow to be taken account of." Law spoke out and then looked back to the swordsman, the blank gaze taking over him.

"WHY ARE YOU SO CRUEL TO ME, ONII-SAN?!"

"Because, it is the only why for me to live." He said before blinking at his own words, shock crossing over his features.

He was lying, he had to be.

His own words broke him and that is when he realized he was becoming much to what he what he wanted to bring down.

His mind was breaking down on him but he didn't want to accept it.


Her body had been ruined before the fire but now it was more of a mutilation than corruption of her body. It was soiled by the fire that tainted her with the burns that spilled across the left half of her body. Her eyes were luckily closed but still blood erupted from the burns boiling her own blood. She bore the white hospital gown that she wore since the disease started marking up her body. The white patches of skin nearly covered her entire face that had not been burned and no death escaped her parched lips or burned nose.

He continued to stare at her before his screams dried out his throat and he slowly backed away from her, trying to process what exactly he had just say and happen.

"Are you alive?" He whispered in false belief until he brought his hand to his eyes, pulling down his face in confusion and fury.

He was certain she was dead since her body laid right before him but something was gnawing at the back of his head, a worm digging around.

"Onii-san?"

He trembled at her voice and looked behind him to see her staring right at him, both eyes opened. Her white gown flowing in the wind, as if she were an angel sent to bring him to Heaven, while her hands were held behind her behind. She gave him an emotionless frown and detached gaze held in her eyes.

"Huh? What are you-?" he began but quickly silenced himself, knowing she was a hallucination.

He needed to leave and the illusion of her would leave. He did not have time to bury her nor try and find the others to bury. He needed to leave the land and never return back.


He was brought back to reality yet again and thus time in the sick bay since the reindeer hovered a light into his eyes before noting he was back. He groaned and attempted to move but Chopper pushed him back down and said, "You need to stay down. You attacked Zoro unconsciously and ended up injured. So until I'm done, lie down on the bed and rest."

He wanted to laugh at the reindeer's idea since he no longer could survive with sleep but accepted the fact that he had done something while being pulled off into a memory. The reindeer then pulled something out in front of him and he blinked at the ink blot, scowling at this.

"I'm not your damn patient to test with." He hissed and Chopper frowned at this before sighing,

Chopper began explaining and Law bite his lip at every mark being made, "You scared us back there, Law. You clearly weren't back consciously and were making remarking to someone being there yet we could not see said person. The words you said before going to an unconscious state were detached and held much aggression towards Zoro. It's not good to-"

"I know what I have, Chopper. I'm schizophrenic." Law stated without any remorse telling the doctor that before the reindeer blinked at this. Shock and horror crossed over the reindeer's feature and shrieked at the statement.

"EHHHHHHHH?!" The reindeer shouted and backed away from him, trying to comprehend the situation.

"I've known for a while. I know how to treat myself." Law said and stood up, looking around to see if she had appeared again, "Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to get some fresh air."

"Wait, how long has this been going on for?!" Chopper exclaimed and Law blinked at this before shifting his gaze away.

It had been going on for far too long.

"Over ten years now." He replied and then admittedly scowled at this, confused to why he should even tell the Strawhats this.

"TEN YEARS?! And you haven't seemed medical attention?!" Chopper continued to yell at him but he ignored the doctor and swiftly placed his hat back on his head.

"I'm a doctor, too. I knew after researching for two years that something was not right with me. I've tried multiple medications but nothing seems to dull it down so I've gotten use to these attacks." Law explained and opened the door to head out but was greeted with a dead body on the ground, bleeding out. He blinked at this and stared at the figure: blond hair coated red with a smile crossed over his features with a blue four star-like symbol below his right eye and red Glasgow grin from either make-up or tattoo. Bullet holes coated the figure and the the white shirt with pink coated turned red from the man's blood. A dark purple feather mantle surrounded him and coated his body with feathers like a fallen bird.

"You're free now."

No, he wasn't. Not from the past that continues to haunt him to this day. He sighed and tried to ignore the fact that he simply side stepped away from the man, acting as calm and normal as possible.

"Law, what did you just see?!" Chopper cried out and he continued to go, ignoring the the doctor.

"YOU LET US ALL DIE, ONII-SAN!"

He released a breath and prepared to go until something caught his arm. He looked to see who it was and once noting who it was, he wanted to kick the person away. She gripped onto his hand and her eyes inked black.

"Ne, onii-san, you promised to protect us but you let us down. You ruined us. You'll ruin them too." She said and he blinked at this before pulling away from her, staring her down while the man slowly moved off of the ground.

He started trembling.

"You're free but you are still chained down. You are holding yourself down." The man spoke and he scowled, teeth grinding against each other.

"ROOM," he spoke and the bubble surrounded them as the man slowly turned his body towards Law, blood dribbling down onto the floor.

"Law, don't do anything!" Chopper shouted once hearing Law speak but he overlooked the doctor's voice and felt a grin slip over his features.

"SHAMBLES." He spoke and his sword appeared in his hand with the blade out and ready to attack, pointing it down to her.

"What do you plan on doing?" The man asked and he waved his sword at the man and her. The ship shook at this and the man's figure was sliced in half as well as girl but in her grasp was still his hand.

"AMPUTATE." He announced and Chopper cried out as he cut his own hand off, no blood spilling since he used his ability to do so.

He was willing to separate his own body as long as they touched him. He did to want to make himself believe that they were in way physical beings to him but illusions in his mind.

"Law, what are you doing?!" another member of the crew cried out but he watched as they both slowly disappeared, as if they were ashes in the wind. He observed his floating hand as it swirled around in the ROOM and quickly called it back to him with a movement of his finger. The hand reattached itself and he released a breath, knowing they would gone for the meantime. He dispelled the ROOM and observed the shocked faces of the Strawhat crew, a frown present on his face.

"Are you an idiot?!"

He turned to face the doctor and said back, "No, I have done this before as an extreme measure. It has been acting up since we are getting closer to Dressrosa."

"At least warn us next time!" Chopper continued to yell at him and he flexed his reattached hand.

"Sorry." He mumbled as as an apology but did not believe in his own words.

"What is going on with Torao, Chopper?" Usopp asked the doctor who frowned and then Law smirked at the crew.

"I'm schizophrenic." He bluntly spoke and Usopp blinked at this, not sure what he meant.

"He is informing us that he considers himself mentality unstable or insane." Robin spoke on the behalf of Law who then nodded at this and most of the crew besides Luffy, Zoro, Robin, and Sanji paled at this.

"YOU LET AN INSANE MAN ON THE SHIP, LUFFY?!" Nami shrieked and Luffy casually blinked at this before shrugging.

"So, what if he's sick?" Luffy stated and everyone continued to stare at the captain in confusion.

"He's crazy! He could kill us, Luffy!" Nami again cried but fell on deaf ears and Law sighed.

"I am not crazy. I have known what I am for over ten years and been self medicating myself. I know the difference reality and illusion. I know how to handle myself." Law told them and leaned against the mast of the ship, "I overact when I know I won't be handle the pressure. That is why I used ROOM and AMPUTATE on myself and illusions, right now. I do not plan on slipping off the edges of reality so soon."

"If anything I can make some medicine to help calm down your hallucinations. It may affect your senses, like dulling them down. We can trust Law, Nami. He is just sick." Chopper said and Law narrowed his eyes at the last word that escaped the reindeer's lips. He licked his parched lips before nodding in agreement even though he did not believe so.

"If you would like me to take medication to help relieve your nerves about me and our alliance, then I will gladly do so." He replied and Nami bit her lip at this, still concerned but nodded.

"As long as they prove to do something, then yes." She said and he ignored the flicker of blood seeping out from her neck, thinking medication could be useful to his situation.


She giggled and he winced at this, trying to ignore her yet proved to be difficult. He knew that she was a hallucination but did not say anything to rest of the crew. He didn't need to be thought of crazy when he had only so long to live.

"Onii-san, can we play?" She asked him and he glanced away to see the two other children laugh at the fact that the man had slipped again. He scowled and clenched his fists tight, glancing back at her. She gave him a smile and he stood up before moving towards an alley to hide from them.

"If we play," he asked in a hushed whisper, "Will you leave me alone for a few minutes?"

She blinked at this before nodding and she continued to laugh as they moved towards the alleyway.

"Ne, onii-san, can we play hide-and-seek?" She wondered and he nodded at this, hoping to finally get some moment of peace.

"Do you want to hide or seek?" He questioned her and she blinked before running more towards the trashed pile of alley.

"I'll hide! You get to find me, onii-san! No peeking!" She exclaimed and he nodded, before facing the dirty wall and closed his eyes. He quietly began to count to himself and she quickly was silenced, already hiding and running from him.

"HIDE IN HERE. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK, OKAY?"

His own voice reminding him of her death caused him to quickly snap out of counting and panicked. His eyes wide in fright before the feeling of dread kicked in.

She could really disappear.

He dashed down the alleyway and started looking around, trying to find her.

"WHERE ARE YOU?!" He cried out in hysteria and his heartbeat pounded against his chest. He could lose her all over again and he couldn't accord that to happen. He reached the mountain pile of trash and began to climb it, scraping himself in the process. He pulled and wheeled himself up, looking around yet she wasn't anywhere in sight.

Worry sunk into his bones and he looked below him, his mind racing that she could underneath.

JUST LIKE HOW HE FOUND HER DEAD.

"No. No. No. NO." He muttered to himself and started pulling and pushing every piece of metal and trash around, trying to seek her out.

"NO! NO! Hey, come out already! I'm starting to freak out!" He called out and continued to plow his way through, sweat building off of his body. He winced as pain infected his body and the white patches on his hands slowly grew.

"This isn't real." He muttered and watched as they continued to grow over his body, horror spreading across his features, "The poison doesn't move this quick. I'm imagining this. Ne, this didn't to happen you so quickly so I'm hallucinating this."

Yet the patches continued to grow over his body and he felt a chuckle escape his lips, observing as the color of his skin drained to white.

"Onii-san, I guess we'll be seeing each other soon!" She cried and he snapped up to see her smiling down at him, her arms open wide to embrace him.

"I guess so!" He exclaimed and laughed, tears building up in his eyes over the fact that he was dying and nothing could be done about it.

"Hey, what are you doing?!"

He blinked and snapped back to reality. She disappeared and he looked behind him to see the three figures stare at him in confusion.

He especially did not like the look of the man with his cigarette in his mouth with a frown on his face.

He looked away and glanced down at his own hands, noting the fact that they had returned to their normal appearance.

He was losing his mind and he couldn't do anything to stop it.


Law stared down at the medicine, in his hand, in wonder, since he was positive he had not seen the medication before, which was odd since he was considered the Surgeon of Death and knew almost every medicine in the world. Chopper stared at him as he waited for him to take it with a glass of water in his opposite hand. He placed the red colored pill in his mouth and took a swig of the water to down it down. He felt it slip down his throat and moved the glass away, a glare present on his face.

"Will there be any other medication you would like for me to take or am I good?" he asked and Chopper grabbed the glass from him before giving a smile small to him.

"Nope. You are all set. Just come back in twelve hours to take the next dose. The medicine does nothing but help ease the hallucinations away or keep them at a distance to easily ignore them." Chopper replied and he sighed, standing up and opened the door to see the crew stare at him.

"Everything is fine. I'm drugged up and shouldn't be causing any more problems." Law stated and most of the crew sighed at the fact.

"Good. Now, we can start getting somewhere." Nami stated and he watched as they headed their way.

"Law, would you mind helping me make some medicine?" Chopper asked and Law nodded at this, knowing he would have no other preferred way of helping. He moved back towards the room until everything shifted around him. He blinked and rubbed his eyes to settle the image but still bothered him.

"What were the side effects of the drug you gave me?" He asked and Chopper blinked at this.

"Are you having trouble seeing? Blurred vision is a common one. If you don't think you can help me then go rest it out. See if someone else needs some help that will satisfy with your issues." Chopper stated and Law nodded.

"Will do." He said before moving on and looked around to see that everyone had disappeared, leaving him to some alone time.

But something was off.

He glanced around again in hope that someone would be around but wasn't. His heartbeat slowly grew faster as he did not know why he was reacting to being alone so badly. He had wanted to be alone but something was not right.

He was getting nervous over the fact that he could not see any of them.

He scowled at the realization and cracked his knuckles, trying to avoid the sense of dread filling him. He was having separation anxiety over it and it seemed crazy but reasonable after seeing them for so long and to finally having some alone time to himself.

Great, he developed separation anxiety from being away from the hallucinations of them.

He blinked before thinking about removing the drug from his system. He had taken the poison out of his system after eating the Ope-Ope Fruit so taking a drug out was nothing in comparison to it. He released a sigh and looked around to see if anyone was around but no one was, to his luck.

He quickly murmured, "ROOM."

The ROOM conformed to fit around just him and the area near his sword and he looked down his body, seeing the tanned skin greet him. He sighed and quickly switched his sword with a barrel. He positioned the blade over his stomach and while also mumbling, "SHAMBLES."

His upper body floated above his torso and then cut more pieces off before finding the medication he sought after. The tiny pill floated between the many pieces of himself and he grabbed it, staring at it.

Should he really remove it when it would rid his problem?

He growled at his split mind and quickly put himself together, noting someone was heading towards him from the noise being made. The ROOM disappeared and he looked to see Zoro glare down at him, his one eye narrowed.

"Ne, when did you get your sword?" Zero questioned him and he smirked at the swordsman.

"I had it in the medical bay." He stated and Zoro blinked at this, unsure if he was lying for not before sighing.

"Fine, then. Do you mind helping me out then?" Zoro asked and Law nodded at this, while following right behind him but no hallucinations greeted him.


"Law, do you have something else besides the Amber Lead Poisoning?"

He blinked and looked towards his new guardian with confusion written over his face. The man's cigarette hung limp between his lips and he sighed before rolling his eyes at this.

"No. The only thing wrong with me is the poison. Why do you ask?" He questioned and the man looked away, letting smoke escape his lips.

"Because I'm starting to believe that the ruin of your town did more to your psyche than I thought." The man said and Law knew exactly what he meant. He pulled his hat away from his face and ignored the man's gaze for some answers.

"…Don't worry about it." Law said and observed the white patches on his hand, "I can handle it. I know what is wrong with me and I know how to treat it."

"How long has this been going on for?" The man asked and Law blinked at this, actually shocked at the question.

"For…well over three years now…" Law said with doubt and the man's eyes grew large at this.

"Ever since Flevance was destroyed?!" The man exclaimed and Law looked away, trying to hide at the fact.

"Yes, it is nothing major. I haven't caught anything. I am fine. Do not worry about it. We need to focus on the Amber Lead Poison." Law stated and the man scowled at this while harshly biting the cigarette between his teeth.

"Law, do you not lie to me about-." The man began but pain shot throughout Law's body for him to respond and his eyes grew wide. His mouth opened to release a cry pf pain but his voice died down as he froze, the pain overriding every sense he had. His vision grew blurry but not before being her stare down at him with empty black eyes did he pass out.


The Straw Hat crew ate in silence and Law observed the crew in curiosity. Normally, they would be talking and having food fights but something was differently off about them. He sighed at this and felt his fingers tap against his arm in restlessness, something he normally did not do. He stared at them before reaching the conclusion that it was another side effect of the medication.

"When does the medication wear off?" Law asked to break the silence and Chopper blinked at this before glancing over at the clock above the table.

"In about half an hour." He replied and Law nodded at this before picking up his food again, eating it.

Silence again surrounded them and he couldn't help but feel the dread reminder of the man's power. His shoulders lumped down and a frown appeared over his face.

The slam of hands on the table caught everyone's attention and looked to see Nami glare at the Surgeon of Death.

"Did you even want to take the medication?" She hissed at him and he shrugged at this while also stuffing a rice ball in his mouth. He chewed it and ignored the orange haired young man before she pulled him up by his jacket.

"Clearly something is not right with you! Don't you want to be better?!" She shouted and he blinked at this.

He hadn't thought of that for a long time. He had gotten used to their presence thought of them as normal life. Getting better meant they would no longer greet him anymore.

"Your definition of getting better is different from mine, girl." He hissed at her and anger pounded in his body to be released.

"Aren't you at all concerned what it has done to your personality?!" She shouted back and he narrowed his eyes at his.

"If you think that is what caused me to be this way then you're dead wrong. I've been like this because of everything that has happened in my life. Don't blame it for me acting this way." He scoffed at her and she bite her lip harshly from his response.

"Onii-san, is she bugging you?"

He ignored her voice and slowly sat back down, ignoring the rattling in his brain.

"YOU SHOULD TAKE CARE OF HER, ONII-SAN."

He whipped around to see her grinning down at him from the ceiling that she stood on her. Her grin dripping blood and ink black eyes staring down at him in anticipation. He clutched his fist and swore softly at her presence.

"I'm fine." He mumbled towards them as he felt his eyelids become heavy and saw their faces of concern, worry, and ready to attack him.

"They don't like me, Onii-san. Why don't they like me?"

She was suddenly in front of him, blocking his view of most of the Straw Hat crew. She knelt down on the table and reached to touch his face, sorrow across her face. The blood continued to spill and trailed down onto his face. He winced at this but tears filled her eyes.

"You still like me, right, onii-san? You won't leave me, right?"

He felt something inside him die at this and his grip on reality disappeared at her words.

"Never." He hissed with anger and his eyes flashed a dangerous color, "I will never leave you. I won't let them."

Yet he knew, he should have gotten help a long time ago but now it was too late.


"We suffer primarily not from our vices or our weaknesses, but from our illusions. We are haunted, not by reality, but by those images we have put in their place."

-Daniel J. Boorstin