"DAMN!" I started my long gurney back to my palace from Sasori's old home, The Red Sand. "Hu OH Shit hu hu!" God, stupid damn clock! Its sooo hot! And I thank my arms broken, damn, that battle was fucking intense. "Shit I sound like Hidan!" I heard a snap and looked down. I saw this bitch, on her side, clutching a small blanket. "HAHA, bitch, what the fuck you tiring to… oh shit." As I pulled back the blanket and saw a baby. "DAMN IT ALL TO HELL MADARA YOU FUCKING LYER!" He told my no children were here. I picked it up by its neck and saw it was a girl. I pulled out a knife and held it to her thought. "Agooo! Agooo!" She said as held her arms out tugging on the knife and looking at me with the biggest eyes that were shimmering. "D-don't look at me like that! I, I'm suppose to kill all of you!" She tilted her head and closed her eyes "Ahhh meh graa!"S-she is kinda cute. Fuck it! I lowered my knife and cradled her. "Hu, it's like you're a child spared by a god. I'll call you Konan."
- TIME SKIP
Pein is now at home and walking to Kakuzu's room!
God he's going to be the one most affected by this. Ok 1 he hates kids. to there expensive to take care of. 3 it's his money. FUCK. I announced my entry to his room, with her hidden of course, and sat on the edge of his desk. "Kakuzu, I have chosen you to be the first to tell. This will affect you the most. It will be a LOT of money. And there's nothing you can do to change this." I saw him twitch and groan. "What is it LEADER!" He said with venom. "I found o baby." I said calmly and put her down, a little too hard, on his desk. "MEEEEHHH GOHH!" She yelled but didn't cry, which made me smirk. She had this demonic look on her face and started carling towards Kakuzu, managing to knock down all of his paperwork. "DAMN IT YOU FUCKING BRAT! GET OFF MY DESK!" He yelled as he pushed her off the desk. "KAKUZU!" I snapped. I started to scolded him. "W-wh. WAHHHH! WAHA!" She cried as she wiped her eyes. "KONAN!" I gasped when I saw blood streaming down her face. I punched him in the face, picked her up, and ran out of his room with her, still crying.
I knocked on Deidara and Sasori's shared bathroom. "UN!" "Dei-cun, please help." I said then realized I asked someone for help and added respect with it. He opened the door fast and gasped. He grabbed my arm that wasn't occupied and pulled me into the room and locked the door. "OMG! Give me her." He yelped as he snatched her out of my arms. "WHAT HAPPENED?" "SHHHHHH! Be quiet! You and Kakuzu are the only ones who know I have her! Kakuzu pushed her off his deck, and he will be punished!" "Well I will be talking to him as well, I mean, if it's ok with you." I chuckled at this and rubbed his hair, in a way that it wouldn't mess up his beloved hair, and pulled him closer by his waist. "Hun, you can do whatever you want, you know that babe." He lit up like a Christmas tree, set Konan down, and raped his arms around my neck and kissed me. "Ok but I still feel bad for cheating on Danna tho, but you're worth it!"
During are heated make out session, we herd Konan giggle and clap her hands. Dei giggled and I rubbed her head and stuck out my tough at her. She lafed and smiled. Deidara finished tending to her wounds and kissed me on the check. "I love you, and call me mama now." He blushed and giggled as he let go of me and left. I sighed and looked at Konan. She was staring at some toothpaste and when she saw me looking at her, her arms reached out for me. "AGOO!" "Huhuhu." I chuckled deeply and saw her … blush? "How old are you?" She titled her head and said agoo again. "Ugh your impassable." I said as I picked her up and proceeded to the living room.
"MEN, FROT AND CENTER!" I yelled when I saw no one in the room. One by one they came in, not noticing the kid except Hidan. "HOLY FUCKING SHIT! WHY DO YOU HAVE A BABY!" "That's why I called you all in here. I found her and didn't have the balls to kill her. The mission said that no kids were there." I looked angrily at Madara and then noticed Sasori stand up and approach me, well Konan to be exact. He snatched her and held her by one arm with his other on his hip. "What The Hell Sasori!" "… this is my sisters child." He said without emotion and tossed her back to me.
"W-what, she's your niece?" "Ya but I'm not taking care of her. Her names Hailae, but call her whatever the fuck you want to, I really don't give a shit." Damn he's a dick! "DANNA! WHAT THE HELL'S YOUR PROBLM! SHE'S SOOOO DAMN CUTE! Leader?" "Yes Deidara." "Can we call her Konan, she looks like an angle!" I mentally sighed and was very grateful that Dei-cun wasn't the dumb blond like everyone thanks he is. "Ya, that sounds nice." "AGOO!" I saw Sasori wince and quickly leave. Noticing Kakuzu sigh and shack his head, I looked down at Konan and laughed out loud, not even embarrassed that everyone looked at me. "Oh Kakuzu, Ha-ha, she really does like you, even if you are a dick! Ha-ha! Ok well this is Konan, get use to her, she aint leaving, EVER. Dismissed!"
