Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the characters in this story. The are property of Masashi Kishimoto.


Kakashi Hatake was walking down the street, his eyes concentrating on his Icha Icha Paradise, as usual. Nothing could go wrong for the Copy Ninja...

...Until Maito Gai showed up.

"Ah, Kakashi!" Gai proclaimed, "How are you doing on this youthfully youthful day full of youth, my youthful rival?"

"Gai, please stop."

"But how can one do so? By the power of youth, I am compelled to youthfully spread the seeds of youth to today's youth in the hopes that they will continue on my youthful legacy!"

"...So this is why Asuma and Kurenai think he's on drugs..."

"So how many seeds of youth have you spread in today's youthfully sunny sunshine of youth?"

"Gai, you're gonna make me cuss."

Konoha's Sublime Green Beast of Prey gasped. "Kakashi! How dare you think of swearing, it's so unyouthful!"

Kakashi began to twitch. "You know what...Gai?"

"What is it, my youthfully youthful rival who is twitching with the almighty youthful power of YOUTH?"

Kakashi was glowing red. "I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!"

"KAKASHI! THAT IS SO UNYOUTHFUL, THE HUMAN ANUS SHOULD BE USED ONLY FOR THE EXCRETION OF WASTE! ANY OTHER USE IN SIMPLY UNYOUTHFUL!"

"Start running."

Gai didn't need to take another hint and the Copy Ninja began to run after him.


Sasuke and Naruto were just walking in the street.

"Hey Sasuke," Naruto started, "Where did Sakura tell us to meet her again?"

"She told me to meet her, idiot." Razor Weekly replied, "I don't know why you're following me."

"Because it's obvious you're gonna get some, Sasuke."

"...Get what?"

"...Are you blind?" Naruto shouted, "You never noticed that she wants you?"

"What does she want me for?" Sasuke deadpanned.

"...Hey, why is Super Bushy Brows-sensei running away from Kakashi-sensei so fast?"

"Probably another one of their challenges."

"MOVE ASIDE, SPARKLING CHILDREN OF YOUTH!" Gai shouted as he ran over Sasuke and Naruto.

"I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU, GAI!" Kakashi shouted as he further ran over his students.

"...Ouch." Naruto sighed.

"Itachi..." Sasuked growled to himself, "You are lucky you don't have to deal with a nutcase who can't stop saying a certain phrase..."


"MOVE ASIDE, NON-GOOD BOYS!" Tobi shouted as he ran over Itachi and Kisame.

"I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU, TOBI!" Deidara shouted as he further ran over his comrades.

"...Ouch." Kisame sighed.

"Foolish little brother..." Itachi said to himself, "You are lucky you don't have to deal with a nutcase who can't stop saying a certain phrase..."


Kakashi had chased Gai almost to the end of the village. Gai was used to running a lot, however, and Kakashi began to lose speed.

"YES!" Gai shouted, "HE'S LOSIN-"

Then Gai tripped and fell.

"YOU'RE GONNA BURN IN HELL!" Kakashi shouted as he jumped onto Gai.


Gai was in the hospital, and he was covered in a full body cast.

"Hey, Gai." Kakashi said as he walked into the room and sat down next to his "rival".

"Hello, Kakashi."

"Sorry about breaking every bone in your body and all..."

Gai tried his best to give his "Nice Guy" pose, despite the fact that he couldn't move a finger and most of his teeth were missing. "All is forgiven, my youthfully full of youth rival!"

Kakashi took out some brass knuckles. "THAT'S IT, FUCKER!"

"NURSEEEEE!"


Be sure to check out "Kakashi's Had It 2", where we see what happens when Gai gets better!