DISCLAIMER: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. All of it. Even Edward. Sigh.
A/N: I always wanted more from the honeymoon scene in Breaking Dawn, so I decided to write a version myself. The scene is sexual, although I tried to be as restrained as possible. As much as I would love Edward to cut loose and liberate his naughty, frisky side, I knew it wasn't going to happen as long as Bella was human. However, in BD, Edward was so plagued by guilt and remorse, I really tried to turn it around so he had a good time during the honeymoon, too (before the bruises show up). This story is completely from Edward's POV and will have five chapters.
I didn't have my usual beta for this story (other than my incredibly sweet husband, who doesn't like Twilight), so if I make any errors, please let me know.
If you like my story, please review it. If you don't like it, I'd love to hear why. Comments help me improve my writing, so I really appreciate your feedback.
************************************************
I stood waist deep in the ocean, trying to calm myself. If I had a heart, its beats would be echoing through the palm trees right now, betraying my lack of confidence. I took an unnecessary deep breath, and concentrated on the way the moonlight shimmered off the water, reducing everything to black, white and grey.
What in the world were we doing? I still couldn't believe I'd let Bella talk me into this. She'd kept her part of the bargain by marrying me, and delighting me with the single best day of my entire existence. It's not like I didn't want Bella on a daily basis, but this was the most dangerous thing I'd ever done. Foolishly, Bella trusted me. I knew that I was strong enough to resist the lure of her blood—I'd proven that time and again, even to myself. This, however, was different. How could I possibly make love to her without hurting her?
I chided myself. Here I was, a century-old vampire, and I was reduced to a quivering coward. Admittedly, part of my anxiety was worrying that I would be awkward, or inappropriate, or unsatisfying. I knew the mechanics of sex. I'd lived with my family long enough to see every position possible—and the physical examples were nothing compared to the visuals I couldn't block out of my mind. More than anything though, I feared hurting Bella yet again.
Bella's shower had ended a while ago, and I couldn't hear her moving around the house. For the millionth time, I wished I could hear her thoughts. Was she regretting her decision for a honeymoon? What was she doing in there? As much as I wanted to peer through the distance into the windows, I kept my back turned. She could take as much time as she needed. Besides, I hadn't yet tamed the worried flow of energy that coursed through my limbs. I could use another minute.
Then I heard her crossing the sand to the palm tree. She paused, and I listened as she tried to slow the frenetic beat of her heart. Was she just nervous? Or did she finally feel the overdue fear of what we were about to do?
I envisioned her face, the perfect pale cheeks, her chocolate eyes. My mind filled with the possibilities of what Bella would be wearing. Despite Alice's attempts to hide this detail, I knew that she had purchased an assortment of lingerie for Bella. Phantom heat rushed through my stomach as I pictured one particular item, sheer and pale blue, with barely enough fabric to cover her skin. I exhaled as I heard Bella drop something on the tree—a robe?—and slowly walk through the gentle waves to meet me.
I studied the moon, urging myself to stay calm, and ignore every impulse to turn, to rush to her, to devour her skin with my mouth. The image of her face grew larger, until it felt like a shining sun against my back, beckoning me to stand in its glory. Nearly two years of memories flooded my head—every smile, every sigh and blush and kiss snowballed into a desperate desire to see Bella, to hold her—knowing that she would be even more captivating than my memory of her. My resolve made me think of Orpheus, and his attempt to retrieve his newly dead wife, Eurydice, from the Underworld*. He was so close, he had only a few more steps, before she would be freed from the grasp of Hades. But one quick glance ruined it all, and he lost her. I marveled that the analogy didn't send me into a fit of panic, dreading the moment when I would finally have to turn Bella and doom her soul. I knew it was a lost cause, and no matter how hard I tried to convince her otherwise, she would be a vampire sooner than later. But in this moment, I didn't care. I vowed that I would not be Orpheus, and I would not lose control.
Bella placed her hand on my own, light as a whisper, and warmer than the tropical water. That simple touch sent electric ripples through my body. I would not hurt her.
"Beautiful," Bella said, her eyes gazing at the nearly full moon.
Silly Bella. She had no idea that nothing in the heavens could compare to her. "It's all right," I replied. I turned to face Bella and my eyes blazed. Naked, with the waves lapping tenderly against her waist, she was beyond perfection. Her porcelain skin gleamed in the moonlight, her wet hair appeared nearly black in the darkness. She looked like a delicate figurine, so fragile. I intertwined our fingers and dipped her hand under the water to keep the chill from her skin.
"But I wouldn't use the word beautiful, not with you standing here in comparison."
The corners of her lips curved upward, and she slowly moved her other hand to rest against my chest. Another current jolted through me, and I couldn't control a shudder as Bella's heat blazed through my empty heart. Her pulse beat through my system, lighting a match that began deep in my body. I tried to slow the flames, knowing I could not allow the passion to consume me completely. If even for a second I pushed too hard or squeezed too much, I might kill her. Fear surged through me, dousing the growing inferno which had been blossoming in my legs, my groin, my stomach. My worst nightmare pulled me back—Bella, deathly pale, her neck lolled too far to the side and gashed open, her unblemished skin shredded. I tensed as I tried to think of any excuse to delay our consummation while dual monsters ripped and fought at the edges my mind. My predator's hunger struggled for release. I'd never seen Bella naked before, and in the glimmering moonlight, I could trace her singing blood as it coursed through her veins with every rapid heartbeat. But I had fought that demon enough to know that no matter what happened, I would not bite Bella because of her blood. The other monster, my greedy, untamed human side, reared its head and could barely be contained. My lack of experience made it even worse. Could I control these rabid, forgotten human urges combined with my deadly vampire strength?
"I promised we would try." I whispered. "If…if I do something wrong, if I hurt you, you must tell me at once." Every nerve snapped to attention. I couldn't let down my guard for even a fraction of a second.
Bella nodded, holding my gaze. She stepped closer and rested her head against my chest. "Don't be afraid," she cooed.
In an ironic effort to protect her, I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her body against my own. The flames exploded through my chest again. The sensation of our skin meeting felt like ice dropped in a boiling kettle. Surprisingly she didn't shiver, but closed her eyes and murmured, "We belong together."
I could never have predicted my response to her statement. Words could not explain how much I loved Bella, how I would do anything to keep her happy and safe. We did belong together, and the truth of it rang out across the ocean like chimes.
"Forever." I stepped back, pulling her deeper into the water until it reached Bella's collarbone. The only way I could proceed slowly was if I removed the distraction of her nakedness. I wanted to start with her beautiful face, to watch her expressions as we blindly explored with our hands.
Bella smiled up at me, content and trusting. I reached up one hand to stroke her cheek, the other on her waist. I kissed her slowly. She placed both her hands on my shoulders and leaned into me. She parted her lips, deeply inhaling my sweet scent and closing her eyes. I brushed my lips against her jawline, pausing at the soft spot behind her ear. Bella's breathing roughened and she tilted her head to the side to expose her neck. I breathed her unique aroma, fresh lavender and freesia, mixed with her pulsating blood, the tang of salt, and the smell of strawberries from her shampoo. I kissed the smooth skin down to her shoulder. My hand slid to her lower back, while the other caressed her collarbone. "I love you, Edward. I'm not afraid. I trust you," Bella whispered.
Encouraged by her words, though still doubting them, I traced her shoulder with the tip of my nose. My hand slid down her sternum, moving to stroke the underside of her breast. Bella shivered, and I heard her heart race. I felt her nipple harden under my thumb and it was like we were two bolts of energy, combining in the water. A jolt ran through her and passed on to me. Bella's breathing grew harder. She looked up at me, her lips still parted and her eyes full of longing. I obliged, and kissed her mouth, fighting to be gentle. She returned my embrace, pushing her lips harder against mine, entwining her fists in my hair and yanking. Both of my hands clenched her hips. Our bodies responded with a burst of heat, as if we were standing in a pit of fire rather than the ocean. I glanced down to see if the water was boiling, shocked to see that it wasn't even steaming.
Bella pulled away, panting. She grinned, her eyes disbelieving.
"You are so perfect, Edward. I'm just in awe of you."
"Me?" What was wrong with this woman? Was she really so blind? "Bella, you have no idea how gorgeous you are. I can't even find the words to describe what you're doing to me. I never felt this alive the entire time I was a human. That I can feel this now, as a vampire, is unbelievable. I'm the luckiest husband in the entire world."
"I'm the luckiest wife." Bella ran both of her hands against my chest. "Kiss me, Edward."
I kissed her once, lingering, before pulling away. With both hands around her waist, I lifted her up above me. Water droplets cascaded over her breasts and down her belly, reflecting the moonlight like gemstones trickling against her skin. I slowly lowered her, kissing her stomach, her neck and chin. Bella pushed my face toward her and crushed my lips with added hunger. I felt myself harden as her pelvis rotated against mine. She groaned softly as her nails raked down my back.
"Bella," I growled lowly. "Please be careful. I'm barely containing myself. I'm trying to go slow so I don't lose control."
She broke away again, her pupils dilated and cheeks flushed bright pink.
"I'm sorry, Edward. I don't mean to get carried away. I just want you so badly."
"Oh, Bella, I want you more than anything in the world."
I couldn't resist. I had to see her body, feel the entirety of her skin. In one fluid movement, I picked her up and stepped toward the beach. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and began kissing along my chin and neck. Despite my better judgment, I raced out of the water. I crossed the sand in a short second and stepped into the bedroom.
