Disclaimer: I was watching the Little Mermaid when this plot bunny came into my head. R&R!

Nessie sighed to herself, plucking away at the yellow sunflower petals. All day, she had busied herself with housework; and upon finishing all that needed to be done, Nessie decided to spend her leisure time pondering her feelings about Jacob Black, whom had no interest in her whatsoever. . . and probably never will.

"He loves me, he loves me not," Nessie murmured to herself, scowling darkly at the loves-me-not petal.

"I can't imagine what that flower did to deserve such a hideous fate," Edward teased, unfolding another newspaper article to read, "all in the name of a crush on a mongrel, too? Pity."

Nessie glanced at her father from his spot on the couch, unaware of the footsteps approaching the cottage.

"Daddy, why didn't you go hunting with the others?" Nessie questioned, bothered with the fact that her most private inclinations about a certain werewolf best friend could be easily read by a parent.

"And miss the opportunity to see my daughter struggle through emotional maturity and infatuation? Never," Edward replied, not fighting to conceal his growing smirk.

"So in other words, you enjoy my pain?" The seemingly sixteen year-old inquired.

"Precisely."

Nessie rolled her eyes, returning the flower petals left to be picked. "He loves me, he loves me not." Staring with wide, milk chocolate brown eyes at the final petal, the half-human half-vampire girl arose from her seat on the sofa, and started bouncing up and down ecstatically. "Yes! He loves me, he loves me! He is so in love with me!"

"Who's in love with you?"

Crap!

Nessie froze in fear, hearing Jacob's smooth, deep voice query her burst of excitement. How long had he been standing there anyway? Why hadn't her father said anything? Finding no time to elaborate, she turned around to face him, blushing an intense scarlet as she did so.

"Um, Brad Pitt," she answered, forcing a convincing smile.

Jake lifted an eyebrow, skeptically gazing at Nessie. She usually wasn't the type of person to gush over celebrities. "Brad Pitt?"

"Yeah-huh," the seven year-old nodded. "Well, you know, a girl can dream."

"Certainly. About Brad Pitt apparently," Edward commented, endlessly amused by his daughter's foolishness. What could be funnier? That Jacob wasn't buying her obvious fib, leaving Nessie to slowly go insane in her silent manner.

"Since when do you care about Brad Pitt?" Jacob asked, ignoring Edward.

"Uh. . ." Nessie gathered the pile of sunflower petals off the sofa and into her palms, flinging them at Jacob. A fair few landed in his long, jet-black hair. "Whoopsy daisy!"

Shaking his tiara of flower petals, Jacob looked to Edward for some sort of an explanation as to what the heck was going on. The vampire simply shrugged, pretending to be too entranced with paper.

"Have you lost your mind?" the werewolf questioned Nessie.

Letting out a long, needless breath, Nessie flopped onto the coach miserably. Indeed this had to be the most embarrassing moment of her life. As the awkward silence lingered in the air—Jacob still expecting for Nessie to tell him why she's acting so insane—she smiled at the idea of a subject change.

"So enough about me, how's your life going?"

[insert epic fail line here]