I know it seems team Stelena in this chapter, it does have both ships, but it's really just Elena's story.
I understood. I understood why he did it.
I had asked him to, that's why he did it. I didn't blame him for anything.
And I am so grateful that matt had survived. He's the closest thing to family I have left.
Stefan left me, because I asked him to. I wanted him to. I needed him to. I don't regret it either.
I understood why he did it.
He did it for me.
I don't think that Damon would have done that. He's not like Stefan; he doesn't respect me or really WANT me to be happy. He would have saved me only because HE couldn't have lived without me, because he's selfish and reckless and impulsive. And that is just the opposite of what love should be.
But that doesn't always mean that's not what it is.
But Stefan. I know I love him. I love him to the ends of the earth, and I will keep on loving him as long as forever can count, and further than that still. I Know I should tell him that, but I think he knows it already.
He loves me too, I know. He told me so. That's why he did it. And that's why I know he did it.
Because I know, when you love someone they are your reason and your life, but in truth, all fulfillment can be found in a smile upon their face. That's why Damon selfish. He loves me, I never doubted that, but the only thing that matters to him is my survival. All because HE needs me, not because he cares.
Stefan saved matt. And I died.
But none of that matters. What's done is done. The question was always: Would I live? Would I die? And now the answer is neither. The inevitable, that I wonder how we avoided for so long, has become. I am a vampire.
I am a vampire. Elena, that was my name. I suppose it still is, or could be. But I'm just not her anymore. She's been dead for years. But she just found an excuse to stop breathing.
Elena Gilbert. My Name. My Story.
I woke up fast. Really fast. Like when you're woken from a really deep sleep. But no, I was dead?! I had been dead.
Air rushed into my lungs, but it didn't feel like it was supposed to feel. It didn't flow like it should; it tripped over itself tumbling down my throat in a ragged current. I gasped and panted, but it still felt funny.
I noticed Stefan and Damon had rushed to my side. Stefan knelt beside my bed and had taken my hand in his, while Damon on the opposite side, kept his distance.
Wait was I in a bed? No, this was a stretcher. Where was I? I looked around, until I realized. The Morgue? Yeah, This was the morgue.
"Elena, are you okay?" Stefan asked. I looked at him blank.
"Yeah? I don't know." I just felt strange. Like completely wired but so disheveled. Like the world around me was completely different. Like I was seeing it for the first time. It was all so complex, everything was enhanced and it was all so confusing. It was like a kids puzzle that you feel stupid because even you just can't get the pieces to fit.
Wait a second. Matt.
"What about matt?" I blurted out. "Is he okay?" I turned completely to face Stefan.
"Yeah, Elena. He's fine." Stefan assured. He stood up a little bit and took my face in his hands. "Look at me," So I did. I think I knew what was happening. I didn't know how, but did it really matter? Of coarse not. Because I knew I was a v-
"Elena," Stefan said. "You had… Well Elena." His voice cracked like he was on the verge of tears. "You had Vampire blood in you-." I reached up to his hands that were on my face to comfort him. "Elena, You're a vampire." He said in what I knew was the most comforting way he could.
I just looked at him, though about to cry myself I couldn't help noticing… He looked damn good. Like REALLY GOOOOD! I just wanted to kiss him. I remember thinking when he came to save me and I was dying, all I really wanted was one real lasting goodbye-kiss. So I kissed him. I kissed him like I had never kissed anyone before. It was kind of short, and it wasn't rushed or lust filled. But it was nothing short of passionate. There was a little bit of tongue on my part, but I really just wanted to be close to him. Our lips moved against each other, locking and pulling apart to dive back in. he had put his hands around my waist, as mine ran through his hair. It went on for about thirty seconds. We pulled apart and he returned his gaze to my eyes.
"I just…" I stammered, as if I had a need to explain myself. "I just really wanted to do that." I said, almost as if it were a question. The corners of his mouth lifted into, what I assumed was attempting to comfort, but in reality was anything short of a real smile. He pulled me into a hug and cradled my head to his chest. I could tell, he mouthed something to Damon. I didn't know what it was but in a few seconds a disgruntled Damon trudged out of the room.
Wait. Just pause.
I was a vampire. A Vampire! This was not okay, and as if reading my thoughts Stefan planted a kiss on my forehead and whispered to me,
"Everything's gonna be okay."
But it wasn't.
