My leg pushed my body back and forth on the swivel chair. I was downstairs of my nanny and pop pops house. Well pop pops house now anyway, my grandma "nanny" died around 1:50 p.m. I think, on December 9th, 2010. I was still in school that day, and wasn't even told until I had gotten home. My dad was in a car accident, so I would be out of k a ride, but my dad lived. Nanny on the other hand didn't. She died of a massive heart-attack, I have been wearing the heart vine necklace she got me when I was very young, and haven't taken it off since. Except maybe one or two days, cause I was mostly getting distracted.

God, I wish I brought my homework! One thing you should know is that I absolutely love writing stories, and just like that I left them there. My special notebook anyway, I don't keep many notebooks I write in because heir usually invaded and critiqued without my knowledge. I was broken, that my dad and so called best friends invaded my privacy. Did it involve them? No...okay maybe. Did they write it? No! Do I want them to? Fuck no! I may love them, but it's like I haven't trusted anybody. My life's a living hell hole. My grandpa died in 84 of the 19th century, my grandma (his divorced wife) died in June of 1999 for not taking her pills to keep alive. My great grandma died in I think 2001 for having a hole in her stomach, my friend Zach, we weren't close, but I was in love with him, he never knew that, god I wish he was still here, I need him.
My heart split in half that day, right down the middle. And had cracks pouring with tears. My grandma "Nanny" died this year or should I say last year since now it's 2011?

So yeah, like I said a living hell hole, the only thing that makes it worth while is my best friends and well my iPod. Oh and um... Casey. He's this really cute guy, light brown hair, sky blue eyes, and has a musical heart. He plays electric guitar, where I, play acoustic. I feel this very strong attraction towards him. Anne or Annie, as she likes to be called, says that he trips every one with his long legs when he bends to open his locker, I don't think he even notices, and apparently she doesn't like his hair? What the f**k? It's hot! It's wavy and spirals into flips, combined with his face, and muscular attire. He's the perfect guy, what I mean is everything about him is well... very handsome, and a sort of man beautiful. Maria or aka Nina said he was ugly. In which I disagree, he is the most beautiful thing out there! Especially to me. The others can't see what I see, I've been sad because he had three classes with me, then no science, no math, then no art! Stupid advanced classes! I've only ever told Anne and Maria aka. Nina. The others have no clue I'm...attracted to him...a lot. Okay Amber stop talking to yourself and start texting Annie, but before I could do that, my mom yelled to me from upstairs.

"Amber" she yelled while an organs music filled the background. I ran up the carpeted steps, and made it up the first staircase and stopped at the floor that which had the bright white door.

"What!" I yelled. "Were leaving in a bit, so get ready!" she said from the next staircase upwards, in the kitchen. Pop pop then echoed her by telling me what she said, but I knew what she said because I heard her.
Rolling my eyes I let my fingers glide against the metal as I walked down it's stairs...


Gosh, I love the water. I carefully steppes out of myt bathrooms shower, careful not to trip over the little wall it had to keep the water from flowing onto the tiled floor. My hands started messing, well, drying I mean, while they were planted onto the hair towel to dry my hair.
I looked up from under the towel and saw auburn strands of hair and some dark brown ones curling on top of my forehead. As my arms started to dry it again, my purple towel that was wrapped around me started to fall. Putting the towel in-between my teeth, I wrapped my towel harder against my body.

Tightly wrapped, I started combing my hair through. It was knotted to say the most. My hair was well a unique color I guess you could say, it's curly yes, it shines light brown everyday, but in the sunlight it's a golden red and blonde with very few strands of black, and my eyes are grey, and I'm pale. So either way ehh. I don't really care about my body or face. I have curves, yes, but I also have a bit of a beer gut. What I mean is I have fat on my stomach, which makes me push my hips out more, I call it my beer gut. What I don't get is, how am I pretty? Three guys, one fourteen year old in massachusetts called me hot, cute and sexy. A nineteen year old in what? India, I think? And a fourteen year old or 13 year old here called me beautiful, cute, I love you, the girl I'm going to marry and some stuff like that. Either way, what they say, I resent that! I'm goth, slash e.m.o, slash Tom boy, slash... Ummmm writer I think? I absolutely love writing! And art! Those are my favorites! I'm wondering if Casey might he in one of my 8th or 9th period classes. I hope so. Maybe I can then find the nerve to talk to him? Let's hope...