I do not own Naruto. But if I did, I would make Sasuke and Sakura a couple! :)
Edited July 24, 2013. (But not majorly, just tried to make the whole story flow a bit better!)
Sakura approached Sasuke, careful not to spill the piping hot bowl of his favorite tomato soup that was in her hands. This was the first time she had ever made anything for her beloved Sasuke-kun to eat, and she had put a lot of effort in to make it perfect. Gently placing the bowl in front of him, Sakura, along with the ubiquitous Karin and Naruto, looked at Sasuke anxiously, waiting for his reaction.
"I don't see why I have to drink this bowl of crap. Or eat. Sakura, why the hell would you make me something that I don't know whether it should quench my thirst, or satisfy my hunger?" Sasuke questioned, nonchalantly. It had taken quite a lot of begging and pleading on Sakura's behalf to get him to eat her food, and Sasuke still seemed a little miffed about it. In response to his comment, Sakura just smiled, too happy to care. "Please, Sasuke-kun, try it, just once, for me," she encouraged sweetly.
Sasuke just rolled his eyes, and dipped his spoon into the bowl. He scooped up some of the red liquid, and brought it halfway to his mouth. Suddenly, he dropped the spoon back into the bowl.
"Did you use organic tomatoes?" Sasuke asked, eyes narrowing. Sakura nodded. Satisfied, Sasuke proceeded to ladle the soup back into his spoon. Stop. "Did you peel off the skins? You should know I hate the skins." Sakura twitched a little, but nodded with a smile. The spoon once again took its place into the bowl of soup.
"Did you use fresh, organic basil?"
"Yes, Sasuke-kun."
"Did you use free-trade, extra, extra virgin olive oil?"
"Yes, Sasuke-kun."
"Did you wash the tomatoes with mineral water from the flowing spring in the mountain?"
"Yes, Sasuke…kun."
"Was the color of the tomatoes bright red? You know that I only eat the ones that are bright red, like my eyes with activated Sharingan."
"Yes, Sasuke...kun, I did."
Naruto leaned over to Karin, "I bet you that Sakura-chan is going to explode in his face." Karin pushed him away with a look of disgust and seethed, "Sasuke-kun is going to make Sakura so ashamed of herself that she has to wear a plastic bag over her head for the rest of her life! She doesn't even deserve to be making MY dear Sasuke-kun food!" Naruto scoffed, and said, "If I win, you have to shave off your hair. If you win, which you won't, I'll give you my Pokemon cards. Deal?" Karin contemplated his offer, but agreed. "Deal."
Meanwhile, Sasuke had not stopped his interrogation.
"Did you make sure that they were all firm? I mean, I want them to be really firm, you know? That's the only way I can appreciate their full potential."
"Oh... I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to..."
"What are you saying?" Sasuke sneered. "You didn't… check the firmness?" Sasuke suddenly became very threatening. His sharingan are activated, and if hypothetically, in the same room there was a hardened man that served in the most gruesome war in history, and took out his own appendix with a rusty spoon on the back of a thrashing shark, he would be cowering in the corner, sucking his thumb like a three-year-old in fear.
Sakura started to protest, "But please, Sasuke-kun, please try it. I spent a whole week remaking the soup over and over again, trying to get it just right for you!"
Sasuke glared at her. Slowly, he took his spoon, dipped it into the soup, and brought it to his lips. Around him, Naruto, Karin, and Sakura held their breath, analyzing Sasuke's unreadable face, not knowing what the heck he was thinking. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of suspense, Sasuke spoke. "It's cold," threw the spoon on the ground, and stood up.
Naruto's heart immediately went out to Sakura, who had bent down to the floor to pick up the spoon that she had oh-so-carefully crafted in her own hand from the finest platinum that she could afford, that she carefully shaped into the shape of her beloved Sasuke's clan symbol, the Uchiha fan, and clutched it to her chest, fighting tears.
Sasuke reached over, took the saltine cracker that Sakura had made into perfectly shaped hearts, threw it on the ground in disgust, and stomped on it right in front of Sakura's face.
CRACK
Sakura stood up, eyes flashing, and looked Sasuke straight in the eye. Her menacing stare was none that he had ever seen before. He couldn't help but admit he was taken aback.
"WHAT THE HELL, UCHIHA!? THE SOUP WAS AS FREAKING HOT AS THE SUN WHEN I BROUGHT IT TO YOU! ITS YOUR STUPIDNESS THAT MADE YOU EAT IT WHEN IT BECAME COLD! WHAT WAS THAT ANYWAYS. DO YOU THINK YOU'RE THE SOUP POLICE OR SOMETHING, INTERROGATING ME LIKE THAT? YOU SHOULD GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS AND JUST ENJOY THE SOUP THAT TOOK ME 7 FREAKING DAYS TO MAKE FOR YOU. 168 HOURS OF MY BEAUTIFUL LIFE GONE TO WASTE. 10,080 MINUTES OF MY LIFE THAT I WON'T EVER GET BACK! 604,800 SECONDS I SPENT PRAYING IN MY MIND THAT YOU WILL LIKE THE STUPID FREAKING SOUP MADE FROM THOSE STUPID FREAKING RED BALLS OF DEATH THAT YOU LIKE SO MUCH TO EAT OR DRINK OR DIP YOUR STUPID HEAD INTO EVERY MORNING!"
Naruto chuckled and poked Karin. "Bye bye hairs." Karin's eyes widened, and promptly fainted. Only too bad for her, because Naruto just let her fall, and Sasuke was too scared to react. Not that he would do anything, but he didn't even notice Karin's body thud on the floor next to him. The pink-haird girl in front of him had just turned into something that he had never seen before.
"OH YEAH, AND YOU LEFT ME ON A BENCH. EVERYDAY, I WAS DECLARING MY UNDYING LOVE FOR YOUR CHICKEN-ASSED HEADED BODY, AND YOU JUST IGNORED ME LIKE I WAS A BUMP ON A LOG. I SHOWED YOU SO MANY SIGNS THAT I LOVED YOU, I CARED FOR YOU WHEN YOU WERE IN THE HOSPITAL, I TREATED YOU EVEN BETTER THAN I TREATED MYSELF! I MADE THE ONLY GIRL THAT EVER STOOD UP FOR ME, AND MY BEST FRIEND NOT TO MENTION, MY DEATH ENEMY BECAUSE OF YOU, YOU STUPID ARROGANT FOOL! YOU STUPID PERSON! YOU SCUM OF THE EARTH! OH YEAH, THEN I FIND YOU WITH THAT STUPID GIRL LYING ON THE FLOOR. MAN, SHE IS EVEN WORSE THAN ME YOU MORON! I GUESS WHAT ATTRACTED YOU TO HER WAS THE FACT THAT SHE HAD THE SAME KIND OF DUCK-BUTT HAIR YOU DID BUT LONGER YOU STUPID BUTT-HEAD! OH, YEAH, NOT TO MENTION THAT IT IS RED. YOU PROBABLY JUST KEPT HER AROUND BECAUSE YOU WERE CONVINCED THAT HER HEAD WAS THIS GIANT SPIKEY STUPID TOMATO! I COULD KILL YOUR STUPID ASS RIGHT NOW! I'M GOING TO TAKE YOUR TESTICLES, CUT IT UP INTO LITTLE PIECES, ADD SOME ORGANIC EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL, SOME OF THOSE TOMATOES YOU LOVE SO MUCH, FETA CHEESE, AND SOME RAW EGGS, ROLL IT INTO A BALL, AND STUFF IT RIGHT DOWN YOUR THROAT, AND THROW YOU INTO THE FLAMING OVEN! WOULD YOU ACTUALLY EAT THAT THEN? HOW WOULD YOU LIKE THAT MISTER I'M-GONNA-LEAVE-THE-GIRL-THAT-SPENT-EVERY-MOMENT-O F-HER-GODDAMN-LIFE-THINKING-ABOUT-THE-BUTTHEADED-M E-ON-A-BENCH!?"
Sakura stopped for a breath. It felt good to finally get that off her chest.
But she wasn't done. Taking the soup, she poured it over his head and propped the bowl on it like a hat. Taking the tablecloth (which she wove herself, into little designs of angels and stuff like that), she tied it around his neck like a cape, and put the spoon into his open mouth, making him look like the stupid fool he is. She then stepped around him, over the unconscious Karin, took the snickering Naruto by the arm and led him out of the door.
Sasuke slowly turned around, bewildered, and whispered, "I'd tap that."
Yes, kind of ADD, and VERY weird. Maybe offensive? Anyways, it is my first work, so I hope you guys liked it! I would love to hear what you guys think. :)
