Kido Neko

"speaking"

'thinking'

Kido or justu or bijuu talking

I own nothing, if I did Sasuke would have died on the bridge, and Haku would have lived.

/

Iruka stood in front of the newly graduated genins and gave them one last look over. While his back was still a little sore from the shuriken that was lodged in his back a few days ago, he was still able to hand out the team lineups.

"Team 1 will be…" the scared chunin began reading off a list on names. "Team 7 will be Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno" the pink headed girl shouted off some nonsense before Iruka could finish off the names. "and Sai." A plae boy in the back of the room let out a sigh. After a shake of his head, Iruka read off the rest of the teams and dismissed them for lunch saying that their sensei's would be there to pick them up after.

The genin filed out of the room and headed off to lunch. Iruka slowly walked over to his chair and sat down. He stared out the window and saw a yellow blur dash across the courtyard. A second later a yellow kitten sat on the window sill and scratched it's paw against the glass. Iruka went over to the window and opened it. The little cat jumped inside and then onto Iruka's desk. It was then that Iruka noticed the blue headband around the cat's neck. Iruka sat down in his chair again and gave the kitten a small scratch behind the ears. "Kiiro, what are you doing here?" the cat looked up at the scared man and pushed his head into his palm. Kiiro got it's name from the bright yellow fur it has. Iruka was one of the only people that it was friendly to in the entire village. While Tora the demon was the hellion of the ninja ranks because of all the injuries he had caused, Kiiro was known for bad habit of biting or scratching anyone that got to close. Iruka reached into his desk and pulled out a small can of tuna. The kitten's eyes lit up.

For the next half an hour the kitten finished eating and then curled up on Iruka's desk and fell asleep. 'lazy little…' Iruka never got to finish that thought because his student began to file in. The kitten took no notice of what was happening around it and continued to sleep.

As time passed the genin teams were slowly pulled away by there jounin sensei's, all except team seven. Iruka knew that it would be a while before their sensei would show up so he left the window open for Kiiro to get out when he woke up. It was three hours later that a silver haired man pulled the door open. As the door opened Kiiro opened a blue eye and let out a low hiss. Without warning a yellow blur flew at the silver haired man. After a minute or two of fighting the kitten the jounin was able to grab the kitten by the scruff of his neck. Pulling out a little ninja wire the jounin proceeded to tie the kitten up. Kiiro hissed again and tried to break free of it's restraints. The jounin stared at the cat with his single eye.

"Well, that was unexpected." The silver haired man said. "On the roof in five minutes." Before he left he grabbed the kitten and then vanished in a puff of smoke. The three genin looked at the place where the man stood of a minute then slowly made their way to the roof.

Once there the three genin saw the strangest sight to date in their minds. The jounin seemed to be lecturing the kitten. While the though of talking to an animal was not odd, the fact that the cat was throwing insults back at the silver haired man was.

"Kakashi you ass, three hours I had to wait. Do you have any clue how much the pink one talks?" the voice that came out of the kitten was a very pissed off teenage girl. The cat was still tied up so it couldn't do any more harm to the man.

"Well, you know a black cat crossed my path and I had to take the long way around." Kakashi lied.

"BULLSHIT!" the kitten yelled. "there aren't any black cats in this village. Now untie me!" the cat twisted against its bonds.

"OK, just no more scratching" Kakashi slowly untied the cat careful of her claws. The insant that Kiiro was free she sank her fangs into the flesh of the jounin's hand. "OW"

"We're even" Kiiro turned and noticed the genin standing there. "Hello." Kiiro waved a paw at the three.

"WHAT? DID THAT CAT JUST TALK?" Sakura yelled putting her hand on her head. Both boys stayed silent, just confused out of their minds.

"What never seen a talking cat?" Kiiro asked. "Now lets get this over with, Ichiraku is having a shrimp ramen deal and I don't want to miss out."

"OK, so let's get started then, tell us your likes, dislikes, hobbies, dreams that sort of thing." Kakashi pulled out his book and began reading when he was head butted by the yellow cat.

"Wait, I don't get it sensei. Can you show us what to do?" Sakura asked. "and why is that cat still here?

"Sure, My name is Kakashi Hatake, my like are my own, I dislike a certain yellow kitten." Said kitten stuck it's tongue out at Kakashi. "My hobbies are…, and I don't really know what my dreams are. And Kiiro is like my personal assistant"

'all we learned was his name' all three genin thought.

"Ass, I'm not you assistant."

"Ok, looks like I'll do his information for you guys. He likes Icha icha Paradise, and reading it in public, his hobbies are reading porn and thinking about porn, and his dream is to be in the Icha Icha Paradise movie." The kitten said. "My name is Kiiro, my likes are fish, seafood, and ramen, I dislike perverts, people who look down on others, and people who try and hurt poor little kittens." The kitten glanced at Kakashi"My hobbies are getting scratched behind my ears and pulling pranks, and my dreams are to find my mom and have a family of my own." Kiiro stretched out and lay in the sunlight. "Mister broody?"

"My name is Sasuke Uchiha, I don't like anything, I dislike quite a lot, my hobbies are training, my dream…no my ambition is to kill a certain man and resurrect my clan." The depressing boy finished.

"Pinky?" Kiiro rolled out of the way of a kunai that came flying towards her.

"My name is Sakura Haruno, the person I like is…" glance at Sasuke. " My hobbies are…" glance at Sasuke. "my dream it to…" break out into blush and squeak.

"And what do you dislike?" Kakashi added.

"Kiiro!" Sakura yelled.

"Last but not least Elmers glue?" Kiiro asked.

"My name is Sai, I like drawing and stuff, I dislike loud people and noised, my hobbies are drawing and painting, and my dream it to learn to be more social." Sai slapped a weird smile on.

"Ok, that's all for today, meet us at training grounds 7 at 7:00 in the morning." Kakashi eye smiled. "We start missions then."

"What kinds of missions?" Sakura asked.

"A very important survival mission with a high failure rate, 66 percent of the genin fail." Kiiro said. "so don't eat breakfast, you will probably puke it up, and Kiiro's poor nose couldn't take that." With a puff Kakashi was gone leaving a pissed off kitten and three genins.
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At seven the next morning the tree genin were waiting for their sensei and the kitten to show up. The genin were tired hungry and getting pissed off.

At nine thirty the kitten showed up with a small sack hanging from it's neck. "YOU'RE LATE!" Sakura yelled. She went over to strangle the little kitten, only for it to jump out of the way and scratch her hand. The hand was drawn back and a foot came at Kiiro next. The Kitten made a dash for it and the foot missed her tail by about and inch. "Death to the kitten."

This went on until ten o'clock when Kakashi showed up. He pulled out an alarm clock and two bells. Before Kiiro could react Kakashi tied a bell around the cat's headband and then put her back on the ground. The other bell was tied around his belt. "Ok, you have until noon to get the bells from me and Kiiro."

"Why are there only two bells?" Sakura asked. "And what happens if we don't get a bell?"

"Well if you don't get a bell then you are tied to that post and I get to eat my lunch in front of you, and the reason that there are only two bells is so that one of you gets tied to the post. And who ever doesn't get a bell goes back to the Academy for more training" Kiiro explained. She back away from the three genin. "Begin." The genin shot off in different directions.

"Well at least they know how to hide well, right Kiiro." Kakashi dove his nose back in his porn.

"Kakashi, Bakudo # 1: SAI!" Kiiro's tail slashed through the air. Without warning Kakashi;s arms snapped around and were locked behind his back. "That's for calling my your assistant. You know I'm here to make sure you're not failing these teams for no reason. What I don't get is why I have to help you train them if they do pass."

"Lord Hokage, want you to be around people for once in your life." Kakashi fought against the invisle bonds, "I'm sorry for calling you my assistant." The spell dropped and Kakashi gained his arm usage back.

"HA, I spend time around people, there's Iruka, Old man Teuchi, Ayame, and the Hokage himself." Kiiro's tail twitched.

"That's what five people. The rest of us you tend to ignore or attack."

"hey, I talk to more people than that." The Cat crouched low ready to pounce on Kakashi.

As this conversation continued towards the more insane the three genin in the forest just watched and wondered what the hell was going on. Yet again their sensei was having an argument with a cat. 'Wait they let their guards down' Sasuke flung two hands full of shuriken and kunai at them. The shuriken sank into the ground after the kitten had moved and Kakashi disappeared in a puff of smoke after getting pummeled by the kunai.

"well, it seems like you finally made your move, little Uke." Kiiro teased the dark depressing boy. The broody boy was no really mad. "If Kakashi were the one doing this he would say something like 'ninja technique number one, taijustu'" the kitten said in a lazy voice to mimic Kakashi. "You had better come at me with intent to kill, or you may never get the bell."

Sasuke didn't waste anymore time and dove at the kitten. Kiiro just jumped straight up and out of reach. Sasuke chucked a other batch of kunai at the cat, who seemed to have stepped out of the way in midair. Kiiro landed back on the ground and turned towards Sasuke as he did hand seals.

"Katon: Goukakyuu No Justu" Sasuke let out a stream of fire towards the kitten. The boy looked around as the fire died down. "were is the bell or the cat?" he looked up, left right, even behind him and there was no sign of the yellow furred kitten.

"Sasuke, I have to admit, that was rather impressive." Kakashi's voice came out of no where. A tug later and Sasuke was a stuck in the ground. "Doton: Shinjuu Zanshu no justu."

"Wait, Kakashi could you get a picture of that?" the kitten seemed to have pulled a camera out of thin air. "I want at least one good memory from today." A few clicks later the camera was passed back to the cat, were it disappeared. Kiiro walked over to Sasuke and sit down in front of him. "You know you messed with my fur, so I mess with your face." Three scratch lines appeared on Sasuke's cheek.

"Damm Cat." Sasuke tried to break free. Kiiro walked next to Kakashi.

"So you got Sakura in a genjustu, then?" Kiiro asked.

A nod later they set out to try and find the last genin. They were coming into the next clearing when a very large, well drawn dog came charging at the two. The dog focused mostly on Kiiro. Sai stepped out of the shadows and went after Kakashi.

"What exactly is that technique?" Kakashi asked.

"Choujuu Giga, if I can draw it, I can bring it to life." Sai answered. Before he could make a move a pressure hit him and he stumbled.

"HADO #4: Byakurai!" a bolt of lightning came out of no where and destroyed the ink dog. "A dog really? It takes a lot more than that to scare me." Kiiro deadpanned. "well Elmers glue, what are you going to do? You have about two minutes left and I don't think you can one bell let alone two bells from us that easily."

"You're right" Sai stood up and the bell rang.

"Head back to the posts and we will be there in a minute or so" Kakashi walked off. As they looked for Sasuke they found him still stuck in his hole with a passed out Sakura not that far off. Kakashi grabbed the two genin then walked back to the posts.

After Sakura was tied to the post, the other two genin waited for her to wake up. When she finally did, they were able to get down to business.

"So, good news and some bad news, what do you want to hear first?" Kakashi asked.

"Wait, Kakashi I have a question." Kiiro raised a paw to stop him. "Have they all been this bad?" a nod from the silver haired scarecrow was the response.

"just give us the good news," Sakura shouted.

"None of you are going back to the Academy" Kakashi said.

"We PASSED!" the pink haired girl screamed. 'all I did was faint, but love wins out, Cha!'

"No you all failed miserably. You will all be dropped from the ninja program and have your chakra sealed away." The kitten said. Kiiro pulled the bell from her bandana and laid down on the ground. "None of you get the point behind this exam, TEAMWORK."

"WHAT?" all three genin looked at the kitten.

"Why do you think that you were put in squads, with people who can cover your back the best?" Kiiro asked. "Teamwork, it's so simple. If you had come at either of us as a team then you would have passed."

"Sakura, you focused solely on Sasuke but Sai was just a little ways away. Sasuke you think that your teammates are below you and that they will hold you back, get over yourself. Sai, you did nothing this entire time but stand there."

'Wait, if the meaning was teamwork, how come there are only two bells?" Sai asked.

"It was to see if you would pick the group over yourself." Kakashi said. "Those who abandon their mission are trash, but those who abandon their comrades are worse then trash. We will have another test after lunch. One rule, sakura can't eat anything." Kakashi left two bentos and then grabbed Kiiro and vanished.

As the three genins stared at the bentos and wondered what was happening, the kitten and the scarecrow watched from a little ways away. Well, Kakashi was watching, Kiiro had her head stuck in a can of tuna, just munching away. "Well, would you look at that." Kiiro picked her head up and looked out at the three genin, Sasuke and Sai were trying to feed Sakura. Sakura was only accepting it from Sasuke but it was an improvement.

"Hado #31: Shakkaho!" a red ball of light shot out and destroyed the post right behind Sasuke. "What do you have to say for your selves?"

"We gave her food so she wouldn't be useless in the next test. We're a team."

"A team?" Kiiro asked. A slight nod was all the response.

"YOU! " the pressure came down on them again, and they all began to sweat.

"ALL!" Kakashi joined in at this point.

"pass" Kakashi stood up with his eye smile, and Kiiro gave them a paws up. "Starting tomarrow Team 7, will be doing missions."

With that Kakashi left the three genin and a kitten there. "Ok, you guys can head home. Sakura, I want to talk to you for a second." Kiiro asked.

"What do you want kitty?" Sakura asked in a rude tone.

"First of all, you will show me the proper respect because I am you superior, and sensei."

"Yea, but I could be going out with Sasuke right know." Sakura whined.

"SHUT UP!" Kiiro let all of her spiritual pressure out on the pink haired girl. She fell to her knees, sweating. "You have to start taking ninja life seriously. Do you know what can happen to a Kunoichi if she gets captured?" the pressure was released

"She gets killed." Sakura answered.

"True, but that is after she is used as a fuck toy for an entire mercenary camp, and she is interrogated to get information out of her." Kiiro responded, the kitten began to mutter something in a low voice.

"Sasuke will save me, if I get captured." She stuck her tongue out at the kitten.

"…wheel. With light, divide this into six. Bakudo # 61: Rikujokoro!" six beams of light slammed into Sakura.

"I can't move! Let me go!"

"So Sakura, where is Sasuke to rescue you?" Kiiro asked. "You see this is the same thing if you were scouting out an area and were found out. It could be days before your teammates find the camp. You are completely helpless." Kiiro began to run a clawed paw over Sakura's leg, cutting just enough so it bleeds slowly.

"SASUKE! HELP!"

"I told you that he is not COMEING!" Kiiro cut her other leg. "Now I have two questions for you. First why did you become a ninja? And second, are you willing to change your ways so you can survive?"

"I joined the ninja program because I wanted to be able to stand up for myself. I don't really know what I'm doing wrong so why would I change my ways. I mean that I was on top of all the kunoichi in the class"

"Because you have book smarts and some of the lowest Chakra reserves I have ever seen. I'll give you a week to do something about you attitude, if it doesn't change I'll pull you from the team and the program. Don't worry you wont have any scars." Kiiro vanished leaving a very confused and angry Sakura.
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Kiiro sat outside the door of the Hokage tower waiting for someone to open the door. Powerful Kiiro may be but there is only one problem with being a cat, you can't open anything.

"Kiiro, what are you doing here?" The voice came from behind Kiiro. The kitten looked back and saw the two eternal chuunin there, Izumo and Kotetsu. These two are always trying to help the little kitten out, often hiding the cat while it runs from the villagers after a prank.

"I need to see the old man." Kiiro told them. Izumo picked the kitten up and then walked through the door.

"you know, I think that the Hokage would install a cat flap for you." Kotetsu said.

"It's considered a safety hazard." Kiiro told them. "You can put me down now." Izumo gave the kitten a quick scratch behind the ears and then set her down. "Later guys." The kitten took off down the hall towards the Hokage's office.

Now the door to the Hokage's office did have a cat flap, the Hokage installed it himself for his feline friend.

"Kiiro, how was the test?" the liver spotted hokage asked.

"Kami help me old man. I hate you for giving me this mission." The kitten hissed at the Hokage.

"You did it as a cat didn't you?" the old man face palmed. "I wanted you to make friends with that team, as a person not a pet."

"Hey you never said that I had to do it as a human." The cat gave the Hokage a toothy grin. "Besides, I'm not one of your ninja you can boss around."

"Yet you wear the headband."

"Well it either that or I have people trying to adopt me, or put me in a shelter." The kitten leaped up onto the Hokage's desk. "Don't worry, if something big comes up I'll change back."

"What about clothing? And weapons?"

"I'll slip a scroll in to Kakashi's stuff later." The cat push an open drawer wider then curled up and fell asleep.

'Hey, that's my Icha Icha drawer. Yellow nuisance .' The Hokage left the kitten alone and turned back to his paperwork. Around seven the Hokage picked up the sleeping cat and walked out of the office.

Once he arrived at the Hokage mansion, he set the now awake kitten down. The Kitten took off towards the laundry room where the dryer was running. "You know for a human, you have to many feline tendencies." The Hokage walked into the kitchen and saw his small family there, his wife of many years, his last remaining son, and his only grandchild. While Asuma was not on the best term with his father he still liver with him to make sure that Konohamaru was protected well.

"Hey Konohamaru, why don't you go get Kiiro from the laundry room, and we can have dinner." The Hokage told his grandson.

"Hey, let me go! KONOHAMARU!" the kitten was pulled off the dryer.

"But Kiiro, it time for dinner." The helmet wearing boy said. A yellow blur came skidding into the kitchen a second later. Kiiro looked around and saw the rest of the Sarutobi clan watching. Konohamaru came into the kitchen a few seconds later and then sat at the table.

"So Asuma, how was your test?" Kiiro asked the blue haired man.

"Alright, but they need some work on overall stuff." Asuma told the cat.

"Biwako, how was the meeting today?"

"It was fine, we are still trying to find a away to break girls of this mentality that they have developed in the last few years. I swear the wannabe to kunoichi ratio is like ten to one." The older woman hung her head. She was the head of the woman's society.

"I know I have seen it as well, between the three graduating teams only one is really serious about her training, and last year only one team graduated, and the girl on that team is the definition of a dedicated ninja." Kiiro stated. "Konohamaru, stop giving Ebisu so much trouble, he may be a closet pervert but he does know how to train people." The rest of the meal was quite conversation.

"Kiiro, are you going to be staying here tonight or are you going to sleep on the streets again?" Biwako asked. She hated the fact that the kitten would spent so many nights sleeping on the streets.

"I'll stay here tonight" the kitten went and curled up on the sofa in the living room. Later that night Biwako came around and pulled a small blanket over Kiiro. "Arigato…Ka-san" the little yellow kitten mewed. Biwako let a tear leak out at this. Thinking back, it has been eight years since that tragic night. The night that Kiiro lost it all, and Konoha lost a small child. Eight years since Kushina Uzumaki was killed by some mysterious killer, and eight years since her child, turned into a cat and almost never changed back.

/

Bakudo # 1: Sai- restrain—locks the arms behind the back

Bakudo # 61: Rikujokoro

Hado # 4: Byakurai – White lightning- shots bolt of lightning from finger

Hado # 31: Shakkaho – Shot of red fire - shots ball of red energy at target

Katon: Goukakyuu No Justu- fire style: grand fire ball

Doton: Shinjuu Zanshu no justu—earth style: head hunter justu- drags enemy underground only leaving head visible

Choujuu Giga- super beast imitation drawing—brings drawings to life

Ok, this is chapter one of Kido Neko. I have had this idea in my head for a long time and I just wanted to write it down to get it out of the way. I have been doing a little bit on most of my stories between homework and classes but today was the first time that I have had any free time to get a good chunk written. I want to focus on my First of seven story but I'm really stuck on what to do and everytime I get started I get like a page, or page and a half written then hate the way it went. I'm sorry if you are mad but I'm trying. This just came easier to write. I will get a chapter posted eventually I just can't tell you when.

Will