Authors note: Hello I would appreciate any constructive critism that you would like to offer. Feel free to point out spelling and grammar errors I would like to eliminate them. I am fairly new to fanfiction so anything you have to say will be appreciated. Hope you enjoy it.

warning: One sided slash.

Disclaimer: If I owned Hannah Montana do you really think I would be on here posting this oneshot.

I do what is expected of me. That means I date the popular guys, hang out with the right girls and do my best to look great at all times. It's what I've done for the last five years, and what I'll probably do for the rest of my life. There was only one exception to the perfect life I built myself, and her name was Sarah.

It started off with a simple conversation about some place called Tibet. Of course at the time I didn't care about some Buddhist monk dudes in some far off land. It was a five minute conversation that changed my life. I remember I couldn't sleep that night. Something about the way her hands moved when she spoke. Or maybe it was the sparkle in her eyes as she tried to convince me to help with some rally. Either way I knew I needed to talk to her...to figure some things out.

The next day I asked her why she cared about people she doesn't know. Her answer blew me away; it made me respect her -among other things. I scoffed and I made fun of her I called her naive and told her to grow up. I did this not because I wanted to but because my 'friends' (and I use this term loosely) were nearby. The hurt in her eyes, the hurt I caused, nearly broke my heart. I wanted to apologize to hold her to do anything but walk away. But I did what I was expected to do and I regret it.

That feeling of regret ate away at me every time I passed her in the halls it grew; I didn't understand it .I had made fun of people before I've mocked them called them names. So why did this one affect me so much? I was determined to find out; so every day I would make an excuse to talk to her. She forgave me within minutes of our next chat. That fact alone made my respect for her (and that unspoken feeling) grow. I couldn't really understand it, if I couldn't forgive myself how could she?

I think about her more often than I should. I often wonder if I'd been someone else or if she had if the feeling would exist. I wonder if she feels the same way, if she counts how many times I click my pen in a class, if she watches me walk away and counts how many seconds until I look back, if she sneaks glances at me while she thinks I'm not watching. I wonder all the time if she feels the same way. But I could never ask her, no that would go against what I am expected to do.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't expected to be anything, I wish I was just another invisible student. I wish I could behave how I want to, be who I want to be... love who I want to. I can't though, because I'm not brave enough, I'm not bold enough I'm not strong enough.

Besides there would be no reason to go against what I'm expected to do...except her. Maybe for her I'd go against what is expected of me. Yes for her and only her; because even though she doesn't know it she is my everything, my world. To her I'm nothing, another faceless student who she occasionally talks to, I sometimes laugh at the absurdity of it all... and sometimes I cry.

And every day I go on with my life, the secret glances, and the rushed exchanges I cherish. Every day my heart aches to tell her how I feel and every day I die a little more. I do what is expected and nothing more.


Thank you for reading and if anyone is wondering the pairing I wrote about was Amber/Sarah a one sided slash.

Have a nice day.