This is just a sort of experiment. I was watching the Office today and I was just, you know, thinking and I came up with this idea of doing a sort of Harry Potter version of the Office and calling it the Hogwarts Teacher's Lounge, or "The Lounge" for short. Yes, the wizards have television in this story and I call the network the show is on WizTelevision. And yes, I will have interview scenes and whatnot and the style may be a little weird, but like I said, it's an experiment. And just in case I made it confusing, in the interview scenes the only person that is talking is the person who is being interviewed. The interviewer has no dialogue.
And I know I have a ridiculous number of WIPs, but I can't focus on just one piece at a time. It doesn't work for me; I don't have that type of attention span. So yeah, here's another multi-chapter fic that I'm starting. Don't judge.
This story will be AU because it takes place after the war and Snape and Lupin are still alive (again). Also, the main romance, or the "Jam" if you will, is Snupin. So, don't like slash? Run far, far away.
It will also focus on the various, random relationships between various professors. So yeah. Like, review and stuff. Thanks.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the Office.
The Pilot
The Hogwarts Teacher's Lounge really brings the citizens of the wizarding world inside the workings of the famed school as well as giving a spice of humanity to the teachers that are so famous for their stark defiance of the Dark Lord. From Minerva to Severus to Remus, it is a portrait of the war veteran with a splash of teenage debauchery. It is the best show on WizTelvision.
Remus Lupin stares blankly into the camera.
"The harshest critics at the Prophet said that?"
--
September, 22nd, 1997
The Hogwarts Teaching Lounge is a simple room, decorated with mahogany tables and red, poufy arm chairs. There is typically a fire roaring, even in the summer because the room is tucked deep within the castle walls and situated over the one of the draftier dungeons. The only stand out piece of furniture is a large, oak armoire that holds the teacher's spare robes. More often than not, there are only one or two teachers in the room at one time. Today it is Remus Lupin and Severus Snape, who are sitting in arm chairs that do not face each other and are making a point of not acknowledging that there are other people in the room, not the camera crew and most certainly not each other.
--
Remus smiles weakly and leans back against the hallway wall.
"Severus and I…our history isn't exactly…good. I mean, when we first met, I thought we could be friends," he pauses, a small, sad smile sliding onto his face, "Needless to say, the rivalry between him and James Potter, one of my dearest friends, was infamous during our school years. I suppose you could say he dislikes me on principle."
"–What? How do I feel about…?"
He looks down at his hands.
"I've never disliked him."
" –Why?"
Remus's eyes stare back into the camera blankly.
"I don't really know."
--
"Lupin," Snape says suddenly without looking up from the essay he's currently scrawling ugly red marks all over, "I saw you talking to Potter yesterday. Why?"
Remus stops grading his own papers and turns slightly to look around the arm of his chair, though he still can't see Snape because of the position of the chairs, "He was asking me for advice."
"What sort of advice?" Snape demands softly. Remus looks up at the camera quizzically and frowns.
"What does it matter, Severus?"
Snape grits his teeth visibly and his grip tightens on his quill, "Lupin, just answer the question."
Remus's expression becomes even more confused and he shrugs at the cameras, "He and Ginny's anniversary is coming up. He wanted advice on what to do for it. Told him they should just spend some time together, do something romantic, if that matters at all to you."
Snape snorts nastily, "I could not possibly care less about Potter's love life," he rolls up the undoubtedly destroyed essay and gets to his feet, "By the way, if you want your wolfsbane, come pick it up tomorrow. I am not bringing it halfway across the school to you."
--
Remus picks at a loose thread on his rather old, frail looking set of brown robes and leans backwards into the arm chair.
"I'd like to think I've gotten to know him fairly well, we've known each other for near thirty years, after all, but honestly? I have no idea what that was about."
--
Snape glares up at the cameras from his seat behind the desk.
"War hero or not, Remus Lupin is still a werewolf. That's all the explanation you need."
--
Filius Flitwick and Pomona Sprout sit later at one of the two mahogany tables in the Lounge sipping tea and ignoring the pile of essays they each have sitting beside them.
"Neville Longbottom's come quite a long way," Flitwick comments and Pomona nods avidly, smiling.
"He's been brilliant lately. Absolutely brilliant."
"I was pleasantly surprised at how much he'd improved at the beginning of this year. I mean, he worked so hard before he disappeared last year, but he must have been practicing the entire summer. He doesn't even hesitate anymore and Merlin knows that was his biggest problem," Flitwick plucks an essay from the top of his pile and the camera zooms in on the name, revealing that it belongs to the student in question, "Even his writing's more confident. He's growing more and more like his father every day."
At that moment, Remus wanders in holding a tea mug and smiling distractedly, "Hello, Pomona, Filius," he greets softly and they both turn to look at him, offering their own hellos.
Remus makes his way over to the fireplace where, as the camera focuses there for the first time, there is a folded bit of parchment lying on the mantle. He grabs it and immediately shoves it into his pocket and jumps when the door swings open and Snape, who is entering and obviously looking for Flitwick, as he zeros in on the tiny man at once, starts speaking, "Filius, I need you to—" Snape stops as he catches sight of the stunned look on Remus's face and scowls at him as he stands there, looking remarkably similar to a deer in the proverbial headlights, "What, Lupin? What the hell are you staring at?"
Remus blinks and, as though coming out of a trance, shakes his head slightly, "Nothing, Severus," he glances surreptitiously at the camera, "I was just leaving."
He crosses the room in four quick strides and brushes passed the Potions Master and into the corridor. Snape frowns at the fire for a moment before turning back to Flitwick.
"I need the exact brew of the Soothing Solution you wanted, Filius," he says pointedly, "Give it to me at dinner."
He then spins and stalks out in Remus's wake.
Sprout and Flitwick exchange a glance.
"I wonder if Remus realizes how obvious he's being?" Sprout asks, looking almost amused.
"I wonder if Snape's thick skull will ever get the less than subtle message?" Flitwick adds, his lips twitching into a smile.
--
Minerva McGonagall stares severely into the camera.
"As headmistress of Hogwarts School, I make a point of not interjecting myself into the personal lives of my teachers."
Her look becomes even more disgusted.
"—Why? Because it's not my business who they choose to have consensual, romantic relationships with. If Pomona and Filius were to take up with each other, it would not my place to pass judgment, even if I am their superior. I am also still a teacher at this school."
She blinks.
"—Snape and Lupin? No. What is between them is their business and I would never, ever try to force something that wouldn't happen naturally. And no, that does not mean I do think there is anything between them. Like I said, it's their business."
McGonagall's mouth becomes a thin line.
"I don't care if this will be good for the school in showing that we've rebuilt a stable learning environment. Interfere with any of the relationships between any of my teachers and I will have you removed from the grounds. Thank you."
She gets up and leaves and the camera turns to watch her stalk moodily down the hallway and round a corner out of sight.
--
Remus cocks his head.
"What was the paper I was getting? Oh. Erm, it was a list of things that I…this is going to sound ridiculous for someone pushing forty, it's a list of things I want to do with my life. Or rather, that I would like to do with my life."
He smiles nervously.
"—What's on it? Well, I mean," he reaches into the folds of his robes and tugs out the folded and obviously old piece of parchment, "I've had it since I was sixteen," he explains as he opens it and frowns down at the list, "Let's see. Teach, which," he gestures around vaguely with his free hand, "I'm obviously doing. That's been crossed off. Erm. Apologize to Sirius for immediately assuming his guilt. I did that too. –You want ones I haven't done?" his frown becomes more pronounced and his brow begins to furrow, "Well, take care of Harry Potter. Which I'm doing, or trying to do anyways. Erm…oh, here's one, work with the Ministry for werewolf rights which…I mean, this is getting kind of political, so I probably shouldn't have mentioned it at all. Visit Rome, which I plan on doing this summer. Purchase a decent flat. Tell Se…"
He breaks off and his expression turns closed off. He looks up at the camera once, quickly, before his gaze darts away off over the lens and stares into the distance.
"Erm, yes, that's basically the sort of things that are on there. Look, I have this pile of papers to grade and I should really get to work on it, so I'll just…be going…"
The camera has zoomed in on his face and, more importantly, his dejected expression as he looks back down at the list he holds on his lap.
"Yes, I'll just be going."
He gets up and leaves.
Produced by WizTelevision
