Is this thing on...? Okay, I'm recording. Ahem.
My name is Kasane. Teto Kasane.
Ooh! I sound so cool! Like a secret agent! Yeah, I'm secret agent Teto!
Anyway, this isn't about me. Though I don't see why not. I'd make a great protagonist!
No, this is about Tei Sukone. She's my adoptive sister with a problem. Actually, multiple problems. But though you may not believe it, as you've always seen Tei as an antagonist, violent, obsessed with Len Kagamine. And I, Failing Secret Agent Teto, am here to tell you why she does all this, why she likes to hide in the cereal box, or how she even fits in there. Actually, nobody but Tei could tell you that... Argh! Stay on topic, Teto! Though I do admit I made the cereal thing up to hook the readerl. So let's start!
See, it all started in the cafeteria of our school, when I noticed a pair of glowing red eyes behind the coat rack. I knew immediately it was Tei, as I had been living with her since I was about five...
No, Teto, that's waaay to far into it.
THEN LET'S SEE YOU DO BETTER, KAGAMINE!
Okay then. Give me the recording thingy... Is it on? There's no light thingy, or anything to tell me that it's on... Okay. My name is Kagamine Rin, and now I'm telling the SCRIPTED story. Teto's pouting in the corner, over there, attempting to write a script. Also, I go to Tei's and Teto's high school as well. And Teto, well, Teto was off by 12 years.
What really happened here was this:
"Agh!" A clash sounded from the outside of the room. Most likely a crash from the beer bottle. The five-year-old was used to it by now. Her parents, Sakine Meito, and Sakine Haku were never really nice to each other, and they got in fights like this a lot. They never really paid attention to their young silver-headed little girl, even though a normal girl her age would need lots of care. No, the child stood there, a bored expression on her little face. She waited for it to end...
Well that's awful! No kid should have to go through that!
Close up, Teto! I'm the one with the script, okay? You... just... SHUSH!
But, Rin, that's child abuse! I'm calling the police!
Do not call the police! DO YOU WANT TO HEAR THE STORY OR NOT!?
Well, yeah...
Then SHUSH! And put your phone down! We are NOT calling the cops, Teto.
She waited for it to end, not daring to exit her room, for fear of being hit...
And then a magical unicorn came, and took her to a happy land where there were rainbows and butterflies and flowers!
What the... Teto, what was that? That is not what happened! Okay pause it. *Static* I've successfully tied up Teto, and locked her in the closet. Now maybe we can get through a sentence!
The Kindergarten was starting tomorrow, and she knew she was the only five-year-old who wouldn't attend. No, her parents would flip if she learned how to behave herself. Unlike they do. Oh, sure they'd be all friendly to someone of higher status...but to her, or their underlings... Gah! The little Tei didn't even want to think about it.
She stayed in her position on the floor, quietly humming "World is Mine" Though nobody knew her talents, Tei was a very good singer for a child. As her childish voice pierced through the silent air, besides some crashing, and screaming from outside (It sounds like Teto is trying to yell "CALL THE POLICE!" through the gag...I untie her. Readers, ignore her) What would happen if the world was really hers? Would she be a good Number 1 Princess? Or would she get selfish? Tei herself didn't know. She also had no idea that she was too young to worry about this at all!
"Tei! Tei! Get in here, girl!" Tei immediately pulled herself out of her fantasies, and ran as fast as her little legs could take her to the sound of her father's voice. He seemed to have...tears in his eyes? The young little girl saw the dead body of her mother, and her father weeping over it. A knife had gone through Haku's forehead.
Tei's red eyes widened at the sight of the corpse, "M-Ma-Mama?! MAMA!"
Haku Yowane-Sakine was already dead. Too dead to hear her daughter's cries. Meito spoke up suddenly, "I'm so sorry, Tei... I was too drunk to realize what I was doing... OH, GOD, I'M SUCH A HORRIBLE FATHER!" Listen, Tei, I want you to run as far as you can. Make it to a pink house owned by Uncle Ted and Aunt Luka -you remember them? Your mom's friends, they have a girl just your age-, and bang on the door until someone lets you in. Tell them your name, and that both your parents are dead. You should also change your surname to Sukone, an inside thing between Ted and I, okay?"
"B-But Papa..."
"Go, Tei! I'm not good enough to look after you. Haku, was, and that's why I'm going to go with her!" Meito grabbed the knife in Haku's head, and held near his own. "Go, Tei! Run!"
Tei grabbed her coat, and did what she was told, hurrying out the door at top speed. In the split second she looked back, she heard the sickening crunch of the knife piercing her father's skull.
And this is where I come in, right, Rin-chan? Oh, gosh, this is so sad! Poor little thing!
Hai, Teto, it is very sad... Oh, you can't cry, Teto! Not now, because it can only get better from here, right? Here, read the script to the reders!
O-okay... Now Tei... sh-she c-c-comes across a p-p-pink house... Sniff... where Kasane Ted, baby me, and Kasane Luka l-lived... Aw, Rin, can't you do it? I'm just a wreck of tears! Sniff...MEITOOO! HAKUUU!
Sigh... Tei eventually came to a pink house where Ted and Luka Kasane and their daughter Teto lived. Seeing Teto's child-sized bicycle, she decided this was the house to go to. Her small boots caked in blood went on tiptoe to reach the knocker.
The door opened to reveal a pleasant pink haired man carrying a little girl looking a lot like him on his back. It reminded Tei of how much she was said to look like Haku, and... Tei burst into tears there and then.
The little girl jumped from her fathers back, and hugged Tei tightly, "Nee, don't be sad. You can be okay." Teto helps Tei up, and shakes her hand, "I'm K'sane Teto! I'm a vegetable, too! A 'tato!"
Ted laughed. First she was French bread, now she's a potato... his daughter never ceased to amaze him. But what amazed him more was the sight of this little girl on his doorstep covered in blood. "Okay, Teto. Why don't you ask her who she is?"
"Okay!" Teto's pink drills bounced as she walked over to Tei, "What's your name?"
"Tei Sukone. My Papa and my Mama are both dead, and I have to go to this house."
Ted thought for a moment. Sukone meant healthy sound... Vegetables were healthy... Ah! Po pi po! Except for that weird twist Meito's girlfriend put on it...
Therefore, you should drink my dubious juice.
It costs a special 20 trillion dollars! (Though who in their right mind would pay that much for juice? Seriously...)
Midnight dubious juice!
Uneasy dubious juice!
Oh, so you had to choose NOW to butt in, Teto...
KO KI KO KI KO KO KI KO!
KO KI KO KI KO KO KI KO!
Proof that Teto does not speak Japanese: THE LYRICS ARE THE SAME AS PO PI PO!
Well, so-RRY if Ko Ki Ko isn't to your liking, Kagamine! But it's my song, and Papa mentions it here!
This isn't about you, it's about Tei. Do I need to tie you up again?
Yipe...continue!
Just then, Luka happened to come to ask Ted if he'd seen the tuna, and saw the bloody, bruised, and cut little girl on the doorstep. Her mother instincts kicked in immediately, "KYAAAA! The poor thing! (Sigh... It'd be awesome if parents were actually like this. Sadly, If I were to commit suicide, they probably would only care that there's nobody there to do Onii-chan's chores while he plays some weird video game about creepy robots and pizza that I couldn't care less about, or how they would sell my left-behind shoes.) Luka had Tei cleaned up, bandaged, and in Teto's clothes in a matter of 20 minutes. Luka really, really, REALLY, wanted to adopt this child, and take her in as their own. Ted somewhat disagreed-she looked so, so much like her dead mother...
Luka ended up convincing Ted to adopt this poor gorl- it wasn't like she'd know that she was adopted by the time she got older, as she was too young to remember a thing- She and Teto accepted each other as sisters.
Hold everything!
What is it now, Teto?
You mean to tell me Tei isn't really my kawaii little sister? KYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!
...I think you should leave the room, Teto...Go sing Fukkireta for 10 hours again, or something.
Okay...
She and Teto accepted each other as sisters, and Tei began to grow. Luka and Ted were such nice parents, and even though Tei didn't have pink hair, and stuck out like a sore finger among them, Tei grew to love her new family, never even knowing she had had another. Or so they thought.
On the third Monday Tei stayed there, she had found an anthill in the yard, and was killing the ants one by one. When Teto came back from planting flowers to see what was going on, the little five-year-old asked, "Are you putting the ants down for naps, Onee-chan?"
Tei continued to stab the ants with her toothpick, "No, I'm ending their sorry little lives. Wanna try, Onee-chan? It gives a great feeling!" Tei held out a toothpick to Teto, who watched in terror as an ant failed to run away from Tei's toothpick of death. Tiny guts spilled out onto the grass. The more ants died, the happier Tei became. Soon, no more ants dared to emerge from the soil. They were all hiding in fear. Tei sat back on her knees, satisfied with her work. Teto's eyes had widened so much, she looked about to burst.
Tei definitely had some weird habits. She would sit on the ground in her room, and said that she was waiting for Ted and Luka to do the, "scary stuff" as she put it. It was obvious that this child had been very abused in her life, as if the signs of scars and bruises weren't enough to tell them, and so, instead of sending Tei to school, they would home school her, although Teto was ready and emotionally healthy enough to go.
Tei was always so excited to see her sister come home, that Ted and Luka thought she should try and go to school with Teto, for just one day in the fourth grade.
It went well, and Tei was definitely more behaved. She still had a few weird habits, and liked seeing death, but Ted and Luka thought she'd be okay in a middle school. Teto would go to the same one, as since they kept Tei out of school, she never knew anyone. So, at 11 years old, two girls were running to the bus stop, about to start sixth grade.
Rin-chan?
Oh~ Konnichiwa, Tei-chan. Speak of the devil!
Why are you reading my life from a script? And why is the cassette player on record?
Um... why don't you tell us what happens in middle school, Tei-chan?
What, me?
It's your story after all
Okay? I just came to tell you to gag Teto, who's singing Fukkireta nonstop. But I'll tell you about middle school...Yeah...that'll be fun...There was only one death report that year...
Konnichiwa... It's been a while hasn't it. My writing has definitely changed a lot, hasn't it. Of course, you probably weren't reading it before at all. And since nobody likes Tei Sukone... I-I thought she deserved a chance to be the heroine for a change. She's always the evil princess-oh, wait, that's Rin... Ah, forget it.
If you don't like it, that isn't my fault. G-Go read someone else's story... I'm not in the mood to deal with haters right now. A-And so what if a Luka x Ted shipping doesn't exist? I think they look kawaii together... Or Meito and Haku...
