1: A Mazoku in the Bush is Worth Two in the Cave
"VESTALIA!" My mother's voice, which struck terror into the hearts of dragons and bandit bosses alike, was leveled at me. I could tell she was more pissed off than usual, because she'd called me by my whole first name...and that's never a good sign. (Vestalia was my great-grandmother's name. You can just call me Talia. Really, I'd strongly prefer if you did. But I digress.)
"How many times do I have to tell you-NO SWORDS IN THE HOUSE!"
Gulp.
So maybe you're wondering: 'Gosh Talia, what exactly did an upstanding young gal like you do to incur the wrath of the world's most powerful sorceress? Surely having a sword in the house is not that big a deal.' To which I would reply, well, it's a long story. I'd probably have to take you back to the time when I was three and I conjured up a golem at my friend's neighbor's cousin's birthday party. But for the sake of keeping this relatively brief, let's just take it back to about four minutes ago, shall we? Please file the following flashback under Talia's Most Epic Adventures:
The enemy swung down with an incredible force, enough to make me break a sweat as I blocked the blow with my longsword.
"Ga ha ha! It's a hundred years too early for you to oppose me, you so-called hero!" he taunted as I just barely managed to shake him off, diving to the left. "Give up this fool's errand now, and perhaps I shall spare your life!" He pointed at me as I recovered and prepared to strike another blow. Talk about rude!
"So long as I live and breathe, so long as the people of this great city have hope, I shall never surrender to thee, Demon Beast Zanaffar!" I retorted. (Hey, an epic battle calls for epic dialogue, right? Not that I talk like that all the time or anything. It just seemed like the right moment for a little pomp and circumstance.) "I, the Swordswoman of Light, shall slay thee! Hah!" With that, I charged forward and swung with all my might-right into the hutch where Mom keeps the good china. Err...I mean, the forbidden trove of ancient regalia. Yeah.
And for some stupid reason—perhaps because the universe is out to get me—just as every last dish, saucer, and teacup of value shattered into billions of tiny pieces, the front door swung open to reveal a woman whose face quickly turned the same shade of crimson as her robes.
"VESTALIA!" My mother's voice, which struck terror into the hearts of dragons and bandit bosses...well, you get the idea. End flashback.
I weighed my options. I could skip town, dye my hair pink, change my name, and become a nun. I could lie and say the goldfish did it. Or…
"He started it!" I hastily blurted out, fingering the other guilty party in the room. If I sang like a canary, I could get my sentence reduced or even be pardoned for my crimes, provided I was willing to throw my accomplice under the bus. Honesty is the best policy, right?
My partner in crime, however, was nowhere near where I'd last spotted him. I figured he must have already concealed his presence. His specialty is stealth after all, and hey, who can really blame the guy? He needs to weasel his way out from under Mom's ironclad death grip even more often than I do, if you can believe that. But while he might have been able to stump your average village kid (and admittedly, me) with the disappearing act, my mom saw through him in an instant. She peeled back the paisley curtains and found the other perp cowering there.
"ALDEN!" she barked.
"Oh hello, Mother dear! Back so soon? I was just dusting like you asked me to!" He lied through his teeth with a chicken-eating grin on his face, large beads of sweat pouring out of the back of his head. Yeah right, Mister Let's Pick The Lock On Dad's Armoire And Play With His Stuff Because Mom Won't Be Back For At Least Another Hour! Way to leave your only sister high and dry!
Or not. Alden might be good at hide-and-seek, but he needed a lot of work in the Powers of Suggestion Department. Mom's face contorted in a way that could only mean I Am This Close to Actually Committing Filicide as she towered over him. "Dusting, huh!?" she said pointedly, plucking a silver sword out of his hands. "With this?"
"I can explain!" Alden interjected. "It...was really thick dust?"
I opened my mouth to say something, anything to get myself out of the doghouse, as Alden crawled behind me from under the window.
"Save your breath, both of you!" Mom snapped. "Do you realize those ceramics were worth a fortune!? They're irreplaceable! I'm so angry right now I-I'm so angry I can't even-!"
"...form full sentences?" I kindly offered, since Mom seemed to be having trouble with that at the moment. Bad idea. She grabbed both of us by the back of the collar. I saw my life flash before my eyes.
Lord have mercy, I'm too young to die!
"You two are beyond grounded!" Mom thundered. "Start packing your bags!"
"What!?" Alden and I whimpered in reply. Oh no. Not that. Anything but that.
Then my mom said the five words I have dreaded since the day I was born.
"You're going to your aunt's!"
And thus our parents decided (without consulting us first) that we would spend the entire summer bussing tables and doing dishes at the restaurant where our aunt works as a waitress, at least until we could earn enough to pay Mom back for the damages. That might sound like a square deal to the uninitiated, but let me assure you, it's a fate worse than death. Because, you see, my Aunt is….
Shudder.
My Aunt is so strict, she makes Mom look like a pushover by comparison. And that's on a good day.
So Alden and I were sent trudging down the long, long, long road that leads to the Royal Capital of Zephilia-at the very butt crack of dawn, no less-under the ever-watchful eye of our dad, who happily took time off from work to accompany us on our journey towards a most certain demise. Dad, you traitor! How could you do this to your beautiful daughter!? I thought miserably as I kicked a tin can down the weather-worn path through the woods that dotted the foothills.
"Come on Dad, can't you beg her to reconsider?!" Alden pleaded, his eyes glistening with big, fat, ugly crocodile tears. "What about our camping trip? You can't just cancel it! We were supposed to spend a week together as rugged, manly men out in the wilderness with only our manliness to guide us!"
Excuse you?! I was supposed to go on that camping trip too, you jerk!
Dad smiled a huge, compassionate, infuriating grin. "There are other ways to prove you're a man, you know," he declared. "I bet you'll figure it out on your own sooner or later, but well...let's just say the road to becoming an adult is paved with hardships. Besides," he scratched his chin, "When your mom gets like this, there's really nothing I can do about it except wait until she's had a good meal or four and hope she gets distracted by something shiny..." Thanks, O enlightened one.
Alden continued his feeble whining, as if he were the only one affected by all this. It's not as if I didn't have anything better to do this summer, either, okay?! I was about to miss the most important moment of my young life-this was supposed to be the summer I finally walked up to the fishmonger's son and said something besides 'I'll take eight pounds of halibut and half a bucket of fish guts please.'
...I mean, I would still say it, but then I was kind of thinking of casually throwing in something along the lines of 'Soooo, the grape festival is coming up, not like I'd be caught dead going there or anything, ha ha,' and he'd say 'Yeah, me neither, it's so lame that we have to go every year, ha ha ha,' and subsequently we'd strike up a conversation about how uncool the whole shebang was and then decide that if our parents were going to make us go anyway, at least we could go suffer through it together, and then we'd gorge ourselves on grape pies and dance under the light of the pale moon for hours and hours and then he'd carry me away on the back of a silver dolphin to his lavishly-furnished fishing villa to live happily, and wealthily, albeit somewhat stinkily, ever after.
Hey, it could happen! Never underestimate the power of my womanly wiles!
….except that if I were four days' walk away from home, my womanly wiles were of no use whatsoever. It kind of threw a monkey wrench into the whole plan. Sigh. Goodbye, my summer of love.
Mercifully, Alden was jostled out of his whiny monologue by a rustling sound in the bushes. He instinctively reached for the dagger at his belt, but my dad put out a hand to stop him. If Dad wasn't sensing a threat, I figured it had to be an adorable bunny or, judging by the amount of rustling, maybe a deer or an exceptionally chubby raccoon…
Or a really loud and irritating kid, apparently.
"Hiya folks! Step right up!" she shouted with enough volume to make a grown dragon go deaf in one ear. "Welcome to Olivia's Magical Shop Of Wonders!" she cheered, scattering a handful of squished confetti around for effect. "Wheee!"
Ugh, who says 'wheee' this early in the morning? Or ever, for that matter?
Judging from the exuberant tone of her voice alone, I immediately disliked her. She looked to be about nine or ten, her mousy hair pulled back with two shiny barrettes. Her hairstyle screamed 'I CUT MY OWN BANGS.' She wore green merchant's tunics and a red mantle, which were in pretty poor taste if you ask me. Blech. First of all, complementary colors like that are so basic that they're a cliché. Second of all, I wouldn't wear a mantle if my life depended on it...I mean, they went out of style at least a decade ago, and that's being generous. Although my mom still seems to think they're the fashion statement of the century. Don't try telling her they're not still in vogue, though, unless you're prepared to hear a 45-minute lecture about the many historical and practical uses of a good mantle. Believe me on this one, okay? You do not want to get her started.
The badly dressed little kid continued shouting, "Everything's extremely rare and valuable! Would you like some jewels, ma'am!? How about a real solid gold watch?"
Huh? I blinked. There wasn't a building around for miles. Was she seriously playing at being a shopkeeper in a backwoods place like this!? (Also, where did she get off calling a sweet, rosy-cheeked thirteen-year-old maiden such as myself ma'am!? The nerve!)
She's got to be kidding, I thought as she pulled out both sides of her mantle to reveal-and this honestly floored me-actual valuables. A silver chalice imprinted with the royal seal of Saillune, a jewel-encrusted amulet worn by a high priest of Sairaag, a golden idol from the Temple of Sellentia, and an odd assortment of what appeared to be...designer watches. My jaw dropped. Not only was there a distinct possibility that this puny kid could be mauled by bears or trampled by boars in the middle of the forest, if she flaunted that stuff around, she was likely to be accosted by-
"Bandits!" my brother shouted, and this time, both he and my dad readied their weapons. A pack of seven filthy brutes came wriggling out of the woodwork, drawn like seagulls to a fresh basket of bread. Figures. I shook my head at the sheer lunacy of it all, but never being one to turn down a featuring role in an action sequence, I decided to start chanting a spell.
"O spirits that move the winds,
Gather in my hand
And become my power."
I hastily rattled off the incantation, or Chaos Words, so I could get to the Power Words, a.k.a. 'the good part.'
"Diem Wing!"
An intense burst of air ripped through the trees, sending both branches and brigands hurtling upwards. Thank you, thank you. Please file this heroic deed under Talia's Most Epic Adventures.
...Or not. The blast had not exactly missed the little girl and the two members of my immediate family, the latter of whom were now up in a tree.
"Talia, you idiot...!" my brother muttered in a pained voice. To make matters worse, an eighth guy showed up and snatched away the unconscious little girl we were trying to rescue. Ugh, can I just crawl under that rock and die now? Thanks.
"He's getting away!" Alden shouted as he and Dad shambled down the tree trunk.
"Thanks, Captain Obvious!" I snapped back as the guy turned around to leave the scene. Now, I say guy instead of bandit, because this guy was no mere highwayman. He wore the deep red robes of a sorcerer, and as I opened my mouth to recite another incantation, he simply vanished, taking the girl in the cloak along for the ride. Which, by the way, is a feat that no mere human being, regardless of how much magic they're capable of, can possibly achieve.
"He's a Mazoku!?" my brother stammered, looking ready to cry big fat ugly actual tears this time.
I'm sure you're at least familiar with the term Mazoku. But since you've probably never been unfortunate enough to run into one, let me level with you here. A Mazoku is bad news personified. They are the living embodiment of evil, the race of monsters that has vowed destruction upon our world.
"Yeah," my dad affirmed as he tightened the grip on his sword. "Looks that way."
To tell you the truth, it was the first time I'd ever seen a Mazoku in person, but when Alden was little, there was an incident with one that emotionally scarred him pretty badly. Usually I'm all for giving my brother grief, but hey, there's a line even I don't cross. So, I've never really asked about the details of what happened that day. All I can tell you with certainty is, if my parents hadn't been there to save his hide at the time, I'd be an only child.
"Well, it's a shame about the kid, really, but I guess we're in over our heads, right guys?" Alden whistled and twiddled his fingers.
But Dad had already taken off in leaps and bounds towards what I could only assume was the direction the guy-the Mazoku, I mean-had gone off to. "Stay here," he called over his shoulder.
"Guess he's got this all figured out. We're counting on you, Dad! Good luck!" Alden clapped nervously. "We'll just, like, y'know, root for you from over here. We'll save you a sandwich!"
"Like hell we will!" I snapped back at my trainwreck of a twin.
"We're not gonna save him a sandwich?" Alden gasped. "That's cold, sis."
"I'm not talking about the sandwiches, dumbass! Do you really want to just stand around here and wait all day while Dad carves up a bunch of bad guys again? He's not getting all the glory this time!" I resolved, yanking my reluctant sidekick along by the boots as he clawed uselessly at the ground.
My bro went kicking and screaming and desperately trying to talk me out of it the whole way, which quite frankly was embarrassing for both of us. As we followed Dad's trail into the mouth of a cave, I clamped my hand over Alden's mouth in order to keep his gross sobbing from giving away our position.
It looked like the cave was the hideout of the group of thugs that had attacked us (or attempted to, anyway). I could smell something cooking on a rotisserie up ahead, and beyond that...the hair on the back of my neck stood up. Was this what Mom meant when she said she cold sense bloodlust?
I felt a tug on my arm and looked over my shoulder to see Alden quite literally shaking in his boots. What happened to the whole bit with you being a rugged manly man out in the wilderness with only your manliness to guide you? I rolled my eyes. Up ahead, I could hear the sounds of clashing steel. My stomach turned, but without thinking I began to run towards the noise.
"Wait!" Alden hissed. It's a good thing I didn't ignore him as usual, because the next thing he said was "Dodge left, there's an arrow trap-"
And sure enough, as I dove to the side, eight arrows shot rapidly out of the darkness, narrowly missing turning me into a human pincushion. Huh. Well, I guess Mr. Manliness is good for something.
"Thanks. I'll take care of the offensive spells— you just cast Lighting and keep an eye out for traps, okay?" I ordered. Alden swallowed hard and nodded. As he cast the spell, I steered him ahead like a human lantern.
"Watch out for the spike pit under the rug there-good, now don't trigger that tripwire by the door-! Bandit at four o'clock!"
And so we went, with Alden surveying the surroundings for danger while I blasted bandits left and right, side stepping traps and all of the bandits Dad had already shish kabobed. A freeze arrow here, a fireball there...you know, the very basics of the basic elemental attack spells. Shamanism is just a hobby of mine, and this was the first time I'd used it in a practical sense. I mean, becoming a great sorceress is on my to-do list and all, but I usually have a lot of other things going on—like school, and my burgeoning social life.
I'd always assumed killing bandits was hard, based on how much Mom talked it up, but they're kind of like walking targets, really. They're big, dumb, slow and squishy. Hey, I could get used to this...
"Watch out for the falling boulders!"
"Tell me sooner next time! Geez!"
...or maybe not. If I had to choose, I guess I'd kind of rather be enjoying my picnic lunch right now.
Before I could really even ponder just how bored these bandits had to be to make this many stupid traps-or what they were trying to protect with them, for that matter-or how Dad had managed to avoid all of them-I ducked into a side passage, waited for the boulders to miss us, and continued ahead. And then there we were, face-to-face with the rest of the band of not-so-merry thieves. They looked like they'd already been steamrolled. Dad and the captured girl were nowhere to be seen, but the pile of bandits strewn about the floor sure looked like his handiwork. He'd probably gone on ahead to rescue the little kid.
Then I felt a presence-the bloodlust I'd sensed earlier. The Mazoku in the red cloak materialized right in front of our eyes. If he noticed us at all, the kidnapper didn't acknowledge it. Instead, he picked up the injured body of what must have been the bandit leader by the throat and spoke to him in a kind of unearthly voice that made my blood run cold.
"My end of the bargain has been fulfilled. Now, give me that which I seek, brigand."
The bandit chief wheezed in indignation. "Your end of the bargain!?" he choked out. "Our hideout is destroyed and my men have been brutalized! There's no way I'd pay you now!"
"Fool," the Mazoku interjected in an icily calm voice. "I never said anything about preserving your pathetic property. Furthermore, you're lucky I agreed to your terms at all...there are other ways of getting what I want."
"Heh...try your worst," the bandit boss smirked. Uh-oh. Famous last words.
"I don't even have to try," his assailant answered levelly. And with that, the bandit chief was toast. Without so much as a snap of the Mazoku's fingers, the man dissolved into dust. My brother, in all his manliness, fainted from shock. Crap! I never thought I'd say this, but I think I'd rather be back at home getting screamed at by Mom right now…!
My mind reeled with the scene I'd just witnessed as I tried to piggyback the unconscious Alden back out the other way. My bro had been right-we were in way over our heads. What was I thinking!?
My heart dropped as I rounded a corner and found myself face-to-face with the Mazoku Kidnapper Guy. Damn, I forgot about the whole teleporting-anywhere-he-wants-to thing…! It's actually sort of hard to think straight when you're running for your life.
"I normally don't go out of my way like this, my dear, but I do need to stop for a quick morsel. The fear on that one is especially delicious," a long, spindly finger reached out towards my brother. "I'll need to cause you a little more suffering to make it worth my while...nothing personal, you understand," the cloaked figure spoke, drawing back his hood for the first time since we'd encountered him.
Hey, here's a riddle for you. What has twelve eyes, wrinkly gold skin, and apparently wants to eat my feelings for lunch? No, it's not a mutant potato. I definitely preferred him with his hood on!
My hands shook as I prepared to launch a spell that could at least hit him from the astral side. "E..Elmekia Lance!" I stuttered, letting loose with my strongest spiritual attack.
The Mazoku looked almost amused as the pillar of energy glanced his arm. "Is that the best you can do?" he chuckled.
"No way!" I shot back, trying to sound indignant. Err, yes way, actually. That is literally the best I can do. Are you there, gods? It's me, Talia…
"Hah. You amuse me, human girl. Let's play a little longer, shall we?" the guy laughed as he rapidly fired white-hot balls of energy out of his twelve gnarled fingers. I scurried to dodge them as they exploded like little fireworks in the darkness, and let me remind you that it was no easy feat with Alden dangling like a particularly drooly sack of bricks around my shoulders.
What was a life-or-death struggle to me was all some big game to the Mazoku, though. I threw up a wind barrier, knowing at this point I could only prolong the inevitable. But I couldn't hold it forever. My life started to flash before my eyes for the second time that week as I wondered why the beautiful (and their brothers) were doomed to die so young...
...wait, that wasn't my life flashing before my eyes, it was Dad's sword! He parried away the white energy as easily as he could swat a fly.
"I dunno what you're doing here, but you picked the wrong guy's kids to mess with, pal," Dad said, flashing a gallant grin.
"Give him hell, Dad!" I whooped, suddenly hopeful that I would live to eat that picnic lunch after all.
Okay, so here's the deal, since right now you may be thinking 'Hold up, how can one guy with a sword hope to beat back a demon with immense astral powers that disintegrates people with his mind!?' And if you're thinking that, you haven't met my dad.
Now, since most Mazoku don't run into a first-rate swordsman wielding the Blast Sword-forged with Elven magic so strong it's known to cleave through boulders, brick walls, and oh yeah, astral beings-the guy wasn't exactly expecting to have to defend himself when my dad made a beeline for him and lobbed him in half like a butter cake. With a scream not unlike the sound of nails on a chalkboard, the demon retreated to the Astral Plane from whence it came.
"Way to go, Dad!" Alden shouted in my ear. Oh, look who's finally awake. Well, as long as he's okay...I made quick work of dropping my useless sibling on the ground.
Dad was at our side in an instant. "Are you both okay?" he asked, sheathing his sword.
"Yeah. Sorry Alden was useless," I shrugged, grinning from ear to ear.
"Uhh, me too," Alden smirked, brushing himself off and standing up slowly. "Sorry Talia fights like a paper bag."
"What!? I'll show you who fights like a paper bag!" I prepared to give my runt of a brother a knuckle sandwich when—
Clonk. Dad's hands gently but firmly gripped Alden and I by the shoulders. Our heads bonked together awkwardly. Ow. "I told you both to wait in the forest," Dad said, sounding as though he'd just been forced to give away a whole box full of puppies. "Why did you come here?"
"I didn't even want to! It was Talia's idea; she dragged me into this!" my thoughtful brother blurted. His honesty is so charming. Remind me to punch him in the guts later.
Dad's eyes bore into me. My eyes bore into the ground. There were an awkward few moments of silence. Huh, is that a mud stain on my shoe? That is suddenly really interesting.
"Talia, listen," he started. Suddenly, something inside me snapped and anger flared up in my chest, though it didn't quite replace the nagging feeling of guilt.
"No, you listen to me, Dad!" I snapped back, pulling my arm away from him. "I took care of those bandits all by myself!"
"It's not the bandits that were the problem here."
"But I beat them! Without any help! Isn't that at least worth something to you!?"
"Nothing is worth losing the two of you," Dad replied, unflinching. My anger quickly gave way to...even more guilt. My eyes sunk back to my feet. Time to get acquainted with Mr. Mud Stain again. Oh, does he have a brother?
"What if I hadn't made it back here in time? How would I ever face your mother then?" Dad argued. The question lingered heavily in the air, unanswered.
Sometimes, I think the look of betrayal in Dad's eyes whenever I do something wrong is way worse than any punishment of Mom's.
We continued the rest of our stroll through the cave in silence.
"Oh, hey guys. What took you so long?" Olivia the Horribly Dressed Kid greeted us as we stepped carefully into the deepest den of the cave to rescue her. She was nonchalantly eating a turkey leg and rooting through the buckets upon buckets of treasure the bandits had stashed away for a rainy day.
Okay, sure, so we risked life and limb to save you, a total stranger, from a gang of thugs and a mid-ranking Mazoku, and the best you can manage is an extremely casual 'Oh, hey guys, what took you so long!?' I am so ready to be done with you and this entire day now.
"Gross. At least we know she has an indoor voice now," I nudged my brother.
"Kids these days. No gratitude, I tell ya," Alden folded his arms across his chest.
Dad sidestepped a goblet as Olivia thoughtlessly tossed it aside, along with a string of pearls and a silver tiara. "Um...are you all right, young lady?" he asked, as courteous as he was confused. Olivia dove into a pile of rubies and began tearing through it.
"Oh, yeah, I'm pretty good. You guys look kind of beat up, though," she popped her head out of the mound, wrinkling her nose. "Thanks for coming to see me, but you can go home now. I'm really busy."
Wait, what!?
"Did she hit her head when you blasted her with that spell?" Alden spoke to me out of the side of his mouth, raising an eyebrow. I scowled. Hey, don't blame me! For all we know, she was like this to begin with!
"That is the same kid from before, right?" Dad puzzled as Olivia started crawling around under the chairs. "The one who was shouting and jumping all around trying to sell us that counterfeit stuff?" I could practically hear the gears in his head smashing together as he tried to reconcile the present circumstances with the recent past.
Wait, did he say counterfeit? I didn't even pick up on that. Dad's sharper than he looks sometimes.
"Hey, I resemble that remark!" Olivia shot back from inside a treasure chest. "Only about half that stuff is counterfeit, y'know. The gold watches are legit!" She chucked out handful after handful of silver coins, leaving them to clatter and roll around on the floor. Alden shrugged and tried to pocket some when Dad wasn't looking, but not before I smacked a few out of his hands to keep for myself. (I don't get much allowance at home, you understand. Mom's kind of a tightwad.)
"Anyway, the counterfeit items were good enough to fool those bandits, so I'm done with them. If you still want them, I guess I could give them to you for half price…" Olivia mulled, trying in vain to lift up a floorboard.
"Still sounds like a rip-off to me," Alden snorted. "Thanks but no thanks, short stuff. Now, if it were something more like a 90% discount, then we'd be talking..."
"Hm. Sixty-five percent off, then?" Olivia haggled.
"Wait a minute, hold everything!" I cut in, less worried about the prices of the phony goods than the rest of Olivia's fishy story so far. "Did you just say you were trying to fool those bandits? You got a death wish or something, shrimp!?"
Dad was just as flabbergasted as I was. "Now listen, young lady. I'm sure you have your reasons and all, but...playing around with guys like that is really dangerous, you know?" he explained. "You could have been seriously hurt." His eyebrows were practically knitting a sweater.
"Huh? Oh, um..." Olivia's eyes lit up as realization dawned on her. "Ohhh, you guys thought I was actually in danger, huh? Yeah, I guess I can see why you'd think that..." she rubbed her chin thoughtfully. Well duh! Usually when a little kid is accosted by thugs and then carried off by a Mazoku to a secret den of thievery, it's not all sunshine and daisies and rainbows! Were you raised in a barn!?
"Like I said, it's nice that you came to look for me, but getting kidnapped was all a part of the plan. I really don't need your help." Olivia explained boredly.
"What?" the rest of us shouted in unison. Alden dropped the gold ingot he was stuffing into his knapsack in surprise. I caught it and tucked it away neatly into my sash.
"Hey, don't look so surprised! It was the easiest way to get in here. Those bandits had some things that belonged to my family. I was just getting them back, that's all," the half-pint waved the chewed-up turkey leg around for emphasis.
"So you just...went ahead and got yourself kidnapped by them. On purpose." I summed up incredulously.
"Sure, what could go wrong?" she shrugged. Ugh! Quite a lot, actually! I fumed internally.
"Hah! Kid, you're all right," Alden gave the thumbs-up of approval. Glad you've found someone on the same wavelength as you, weirdo.
Olivia probably missed the compliment, because by then she was waddling through a pile of stolen pottery. She shook jar after jar like a thing possessed as we looked on, perplexed. The pipsqueak plucked a magnifying glass out of her mantle and sighed, "Well, look, you guys...if you really don't have anything better to do, can you help me look for my stuff?"
"What makes you think we don't have anything better to do!?" I seethed, thinking of my picnic lunch again.
"Of course we will," Dad said pointedly, patting me on the head. "We've got plenty of time to help you out. Right, guys?"
Ugh, speak for yourself, old man! My schedule doesn't involve your fatal weakness for helping small children, animals and the elderly! This is the stupidest...wait, is that a pair of sapphire earrings over there? Maybe I'll just start searching in that direction, and if they should happen to accidentally fall into my pocket, I'm sure no one will miss them…
"What exactly are you looking for, anyway?" Alden asked, rolling up his sleeves and heading straight for the weapons pile. Yeah, no ulterior motives there.
"Right, could you tell us more about them? It would be really helpful to know what your missing things look like," Dad said agreeably, squatting down to be on eye level with the half-pint halfwit.
Olivia obliged us with a description. Sort of. "Well...there's four of them, see? They're about this big…" she made a motion to indicate an object about the size of a biscuit, "They're different colors, and they're really shiny," she nodded matter-of-factly.
That could describe literally anything in this room! How is that even remotely helpful!?
"Oh, I see," Dad smiled, catching me off guard. What, exactly, do you see!? Because I'm still kind of lost here. "So...something like this thing, then?" he asked, reaching down to pick up an obsidian stone set in a silver broach. He presented it to the brat, who squealed like a delighted little piglet.
"Wow, that's exactly it! Thanks mister!" Olivia clasped her hands together gratefully, then plucked the broach out of Dad's hands.
Wait, what the hell, Dad!? Was that just dumb luck, or do you know something I don't here?
"This is one of my Grandpa's treasures. He gave it to me before he died," Olivia explained, tucking the broach safely into her mantle. "I'm responsible for keeping them safe."
"Oh, I see," dad nodded, seeming thoughtful. "So that's why it's so special to you, huh?" he smiled. "I understand."
Olivia turned to my brother and I. "There are three more still in here! Come on, chop chop! We've gotta find them!" she urged. Oh come on, I did not sign on to be this little brat's errand girl!
"Treat your seniors with some respect!" I muttered as I rifled through some doubloons. It was going to be a long day.
It took us nearly two and a half hours, but somehow we managed to locate the rest of Olivia's lost stuff. The other three items she was looking for were part of a matching set with the broach, cast in the same silver plating but with differently colored gemstones in each. Their value must have been sentimental, I thought, because there were other treasures in the room that would fetch a much higher market price.
As I begrudgingly handed Olivia the last of them-a crystal one-she jumped up and down like the overly excited little dog she was.
"Well, that's that. I'm starving," Alden complained, whipping out his own picnic lunch.
"Can't you even wait until we get outside, you glutton!?" I scolded. I was sick of this cave already. A little fresh air sounded pretty good right about now. "Tell him to wait, Dad!" I whipped around to look for my father, who had been standing guard.
Dad didn't answer me. He was on edge, his sword drawn. "Nobody move," he whispered. Oh, what now!? I wondered crankily. I thought we took care of all the bad guys!
"I will…meet my objective…" said a scratchy voice from the darkness. "No matter the cost…"
"I will not fail my master…" said another, "No matter the cost…"
What appeared next was pretty gruesome, so sorry in advance if you're squeamish. Two of the bandits we'd beaten earlier shambled towards us, but they weren't quite their regular, lovable, greasy old selves. Their arms and legs moved unnaturally in their joints, their flesh expanding and contracting oddly with each step. Each one had six beady eyes and a long, golden, spindly arm. Almost like…
"They fused with the Mazoku?!" Alden gulped, seeming faint again.
I turned around and gave him a good smack across the face. "Keep it together, Alden!" I warned. "If you pass out for the second time today, so help me, I am NOT lugging your sorry ass around again!"
"But he almost killed us before-and now there're TWO of him!" He shook like a leaf, but tried concealing his presence behind a barrel. I suppose I should do him a solid and remind you now that he's not usually this much of a chicken in battle. It's just that the whole "Mazoku Incident" of his childhood was apparently so traumatic, he gets paralyzed every time we face off against one. I was starting to suspect that his decision to train himself as a rogue wasn't solely based on sneaking away from Mom.
However, there were a few new circumstances that gave us the upper hand this time. First and foremost, we had Dad with us. He was doing a pretty good job of blocking attacks from two enemies at once. Also…
"Chill out for a second, would you, bro? Look, quantity isn't necessarily quality in this case. He's split himself in half, so each body has roughly half the power he had before. Plus he's got physical bodies now since he combined with the bandits, see? First of all, that negates his ability to teleport. Second of all, we can damage him with spells or weapons that attack him physically. For example—
"Stop talking and do something!" Alden flailed. "Dad's in trouble!"
Now, I had read about all this in a book from Mom's library recently, so I was kind of eager to show off my newfound knowledge of magical theory. But I guess there's a possibility that maybe it wasn't the best time for an impressive show of my above-average intelligence.
"Hey, Talia? You know that spell you've been practicing behind the garden shed at night? The one you thought you were keeping a secret from me and Mom?" Dad grimaced as the two half demons flanked him on either side, each one assaulting him with the exploding orbs of energy. Though he dodged with relative ease, he had to be on the defensive instead of the offensive this time, since one misplaced thrust could leave him open for an attack from behind.
My ears turned pink. "Will I get in trouble if I say yes?" I asked cautiously.
"Just do it!" Alden exclaimed irritably as he tossed me a nearby rapier from the weapons pile. "Use this."
"Oh, you can use magic too, Big Sis?" Olivia gazed up at me, wide-eyed. "I wanna see!"
Well, finally! A chance to show them my real power. I ignored how annoyingly chummy Olivia was being with me and twirled the rapier around a bit. "Stand back kid, I'm about to knock your socks off," I smirked.
Olivia joined my bro by the barrel, looking on curiously as I scrawled a quick magic circle on the ground with the blade. A line here, a curve there, rinse and repeat, et voila. A little lopsided, but it was the best I could do in a pinch.
I'm actually not the best at drawing, and that was why I'd been practicing at home, alone, in the middle of the night, behind the shed...well, and maybe I had a few other reasons to keep it a secret—but I guess I hadn't covered my scribbles well enough to really hide them from Mom. Oh, well, it kind of worked out in the end, anyway.
"Gaia Graze!" I chanted. From out of the magic circle sprung a Brass Demon, ready to follow my every command. I passed the rapier on to him.
"Okay, Brass Demon, get in there and cover Dad's back! And try to take out those two goons while you're at it," I ordered. All that was left now was to stand back and admire my handiwork as he slashed his way to victory.
"Oh…" Olivia cocked her head. "So that was your plan?"
"Yeah, now it's two-on-two and Dad can focus on offense again," I explained. "Pretty genius, right?" I said with a flourish.
"Not really," Olivia remarked, creasing her brow. "Your Brass Demon's kind of slow," she pointed out. "He can't even fly. I don't think he'll be able to do much except maybe act as a meat shield…"
Slow?! SLOW?! Well who died and made you an expert?! I mean, I guess he is a little chunky for a brass demon, but beggars can't be choosers, right?! "Oh yeah?!" I retorted. "I'd like to see you do better, pipsqueak!"
Olivia shrugged. "Oh, okay then," she replied with a totally straight face. "You might want to put up a wind barrier first though."
Um, what?! Hasn't this kid ever heard of being rhetorical?! "Hey, wait…!" I called out to her as she walked headfirst into the thick of the battle. Oh no...am I gonna get blamed for manslaughter?! I can't watch…
Olivia raised her hands over her head. I buried my face in my palms. Then...
"Thou who art darker than night…"
What what what?! My hands flew to my hair. My jaw dropped so fast it nearly fell out of my head. That spell...is she serious?!
"Thou who art redder than flowing blood…"
An immense power began to gather between Olivia's outstretched hands. Holy Mother of Gaav, she is serious! Is...is this real life?! Dad's head turned sharply when he heard what was going on behind him. Oh no...Dad! If he gets caught up in this…
"Brass Demon, get Dad out of there!" I shouted. And the Brass Demon obeyed, picking Dad up like a sack of potatoes. He ran like a bat out of hell and into the safety zone behind us, flapping his tiny, useless wings behind him.
"Thou through whom time flows, I call upon thy exalted name…"
Now that I knew it was getting serious, I put up a shield to protect us from the potential fallout.
"I pledge myself to darkness..."
Part of me wanted the kid to be full of crap so I could laugh in her face later, and part of me was morbidly curious to see what would happen if she succeeded.
"Let those fools
Who would oppose us
Suffer destruction
By the power we two possess!"
Yep, this was happening all right. Up until now, there was only one person I knew who was capable of pulling off a spell of this complexity...the single most destructive spell castable by a mere human being. Originally known as the Dragon Slayer, it was developed over 1,000 years ago by the sage Lei Magnus, whose soul contained a fragment of the Dark Lord Shabranigdu, the most powerful of all Mazoku. In fact, the spell draws power from Shabranigdu himself. Pretty scary stuff, right?
...yeah, I got that sweet bit of info out of one of Mom's books, too. Sorry for the massive info dump. It's likely you already knew that, huh? Anyway, we now return to your regularly scheduled explosion.
"Dragon Slave!" Olivia finished spectacularly.
Kaboooooooom! The ensuing blast ripped through the cave around us, sending debris careening hundreds of feet in the air. It tore the half demons, the bandits, and everything else in the hideout to shreds. My shield barely managed to keep us stabilized. At the end of it all, we found ourselves standing at the edge of a crater where there had once been a cave, a forest, and a hillside.
Damn. Just who the hell was this kid?
"You, you…! You idiot!" I karate chopped Olivia with all the strength my addled body could muster. "Don't you realize you could've gotten us all killed?! You can't just fire off a Dragon Slave anywhere you damn well please! Even with a protective barrier up, it's still the most dangerous spell in all Black Magic!" I grappled with the air and shouted as I nearly exploded from the sheer impossibility of it all.
"Yeah, I know," Olivia rubbed her head gingerly. "My Grandpa taught it to me," she shrugged.
"Whoa...dude! That was wicked awesome!" Alden shrieked, staggering out from behind the barrel to shake Olivia's hand aggressively. "You totally rule, Olivia."
"Thanks," Olivia smiled at her feet bashfully.
"Don't encourage her, you dolt!" I screamed.
The Brass Demon waddled forward and gently placed Dad down next to me, then shuffled as far away from Olivia as he comfortably could. It was a bit awkward. Dad sheathed his sword. He looked at the crater. He looked at Olivia. He looked at the crater again. He looked back at Olivia.
"So…" he shoved his hands in his pockets and sighed deeply, looking a few years older than when we'd left home in the morning. "Who wants ice cream?"
"Yay!" cheered Olivia and Alden.
"Whatever," I glowered.
