Well...this...is just odd. This story...is just...yeah.
I don't like Navi.
Disclaimer: I do roleplay as Navi. However, I do not own anything Legend of Zelda. I do not own the series, I do not own the characters. I do technically own Legend of Cleverbot, but as that's something else entirely, I don't know why I even mentioned it.
Once upon a time, there was a fairy named Navi. She had served the Great Deku Tree well for many years, but it was time for her to leave the Great Deku Tree. It was time for her to become the fairy of a boy named Link. Link was a resident of the Kokiri Forest, but unlike the other residents, he wasn't a Kokiri. He was a Hylian. Long ago, his dying mother had brought him to the forest to be raised there in safety, but that's not important.
When Navi first heard she was going to be someone's fairy at last, she was excited. At first, she didn't care that her companion was a mute. The mere thought of going out and exploring was enough to excite her. But after some time, she noticed something. Link didn't seem quite as happy as she was to be going on this journey together. Every time she said the famous words 'Hey! Listen!' she received a dirty look in response. Fortunately, the mute hero couldn't speak, for if he could, Navi couldn't imagine some of the things that he would say to her. Horrible, angry things, to be certain. As time went on and Navi caught his attention for various reasons more often, Link's looks got even worse. He looked almost like...he was ready to murder her or something. All Navi could do was hope he wouldn't.
Well...
Link swam though the path that went from Zora's Domain to Lake Hylia. He had recently arrived at the home of the Zoras to learn that Princess Ruto had gone missing. He needed the Zora's Sapphire to defeat Ganon, and King Zora wouldn't help him until she was found, but that's not important either. As he searched in the water, looking for any clue of the whereabouts of the princess, those dreaded words came once again.
"Hey! Listen!"
Poor Navi, being helpful for once, was alerting him to a bottle with a note inside floating along the surface of the Lake.
Link had had enough. He swam to the surface and grabbed Navi by the wings, which stopped most of her struggles, and pulled her down close to his face. There was a dark look in his eyes, and as she watched him glare at her, wondering what to do, a smirk grew on his face. He grabbed his sword...and cut her in half. The scream was short, as the fairy had barely seen it coming. The lake began to turn red as her blood spread throughout the ocean, but Link didn't care. The hero had just done the most heroic deed of all: ridding the world of Navi the fairy.
YES DIE NAVI DIE- ahem.
Yes. My brain is certainly an...interesting place to live in.
